


My Star

by Dreamofshadows



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Parents, Comedy, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Family Drama, Family Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Mush, Idols, Jennie Kim Is So Done, Jennie Kim Is So Whipped, Kim Namjoon | RM is Whipped, Kim Taehyung | V is Whipped, Kim Taehyung | V is a Little Shit, M/M, Min Yoongi | Suga Is Whipped, Min Yoongi | Suga is So Done, Personal Growth, Relationship Reveal, Retirement, Romantic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:15:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 84,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23393131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dreamofshadows/pseuds/Dreamofshadows
Summary: Wherein Min Yoongi falls for the youngest member of Blackpink, who shines bright as the brightest star.(A collection of one-shots centring on the pair with other members' stories interwoven in between.)[cross-posted from Wattpad]
Relationships: Lalisa Manoban | Lisa/Min Yoongi | Suga, Others that will be revealed as the story progresses and I really don't want to spoil them here
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	1. My Star

He must have been the only one who noticed her running away from her members after their performance.

And without thinking, without even putting conscious effort into his actions, Yoongi stood up abruptly and excused himself from the table.

He was going to follow the sun, no matter where she went.

To hell with cameras and those hateful people behind their TV screens, ready to bash anyone. He didn't care anymore if he was associated with idols by deluded people. Those girls, and her in particular, didn't deserve such disrespect. It was disgusting and vile and he was sometimes ashamed he was part of the industry that hurt so many with its cruel, unfeeling judgements.

The sun was in trouble and he wasn't about to sit back.

He searched for about fifteen minutes. His sense of direction was basic at best, and even though he was practically a veteran at music shows, he usually didn't venture to the restrooms alone for fear of never making it back.

He felt his heart sinking as his phone vibrated for the tenth time. He sighed when he decided to take the call, knowing he was in for an earful.

"Yah, where the hell are you?" Jin asked, his voice taut with anxiety. "We need to be on the stage soon, Namjoon's pacing around and the maknaes are driving me-NO TAE STOP IT YOU-"

He rolled his eyes and was about to reply when a distant movement in his dimly light surroundings caught his attention.

"I'll be there soon hyung, catch you later."

"But wait, Yoon-"

He ended the call and hurried towards the leggy, forlorn figure slumped against the door of Blackpink's dressing room.

Her silky, luscious hair hid her face. Her arms gripped her elbows tightly, as if she was afraid of falling apart. He could hear quiet sobs as he softly padded closer.

The sight of her, so vulnerable and fragile, was enough to choke him. Hearing her actually crying out of misery was inconceivable but here he was, and it crushed his heart, leaving him breathless.

He opened his mouth. "Hey, you okay?"

_Smooth, Min, smooth._

She jumped, literally jumped, into the air. Wide, wet eyes collided with his stern gaze and his resolve faltered, his rehearsed words vanishing in a blink.

He had meant to warn her about Dispatch snooping around, nothing more.

But all that went out of the window when he finally saw her distraught face up close.

_Beautiful._

_How could anyone hate this angel?_

_Even with her makeup smudged, her beauty was undeniably exotic._

_And those eyes, he felt himself falling into them the longer he stared: deep pools of emotion, clouded with shadows. But past those shadows, he could see swirling stars._

_It was mesmerising._

"S-s-sunbae?" Lisa stuttered, hastily wiping her face and then inwardly cursing when her hand came away smudged with mascara. "What-what are you doing here?"

"I could say the same for you," he returned nonchalantly, hands in pockets. He was feeling anything but nonchalant next to this Thai goddess but Tae's coaching in acting seemed to be working.

"I...I...was...having a little moment..." she mumbled, straightening up to her full height. She nodded at him and bowed. "I'll be going now, sunbae. Good luck on your performance."

She was going to walk past him when his hand shot out and gently latched on to her wrist.

"Wait."

His touch was electric and for the second time, Lisa started in shock. He bit his lip, amused at her reaction and released his hold.

"Sorry about that."

"It's...it's ok," she squeaked, "did you want something, sunbae?"

He regarded her thoughtfully.

"Smile." he said simply.

Lisa's jaw dropped. "P-pardon?"

"Smile," he said again, "don't let the world change your smile, Lisa-ssi. To hell with all the hate and backlash those ungrateful, ignorant masses throw at you. Show everyone the tough, fiery rapper of Blackpink. Burn them down with your fire, your kindness, your smile, your happiness and then watch them seethe in anger. Gloat over them as they stamp their feet and tear their hair out trying to drag you down. Don't let them win."

His eyes glowed like hot coals. "Rise above it all, Lisa-ssi. You're so much more than what they make you to be."

Lisa was taken aback at this passionate outburst from BTS's rapper. She had seen Suga at many shows of course, and they bowed to each other on occasions, but she had never in her life imagined him addressing her with such earnest, _sincere_ words. They were like a soothing balm on her hurting psyche.

"Sunbae...thank you..." she mumbled, "but...it gets so hard sometimes..."

He shrugged. "Didn't stop me..."

As he pushed past her, Lisa could have sworn she heard him whisper:

"...and neither will it stop you."

*

The next time he saw her was months later, at yet another music awards show.

Actually in his mind, he had seen her everyday, and he had secretly been staying updated with their appearances and shows.

Following the scandal that nearly cost them the respect and recognition they commanded ever since bursting unto the K-pop scene, Blackpink was slowly, painstakingly picking up the pieces, winning back their audiences with their usual stellar performances and undeniable stage presence.

The girls were breath-taking as always: the rap line trading fire and the vocal line blessing them with angelic harmonisation. Yoongi relished Blackpink's time on stage: they were one of the few groups he actually looked forward to.

And no, not just because of Lisa-ssi.

Well, yes of course, he would be a liar to dismiss those wide, innocent eyes belying her swag; that smirk when the camera zoomed in on her; that smooth flow; her brassy, firm voice ringing around the arena, and her fluid footwork.

"Aww yes, you go girls!" J-hope clapped, echoed by Jin and Namjoon. The maknaes next to him were similarly enthusiastic.

"Jennie's killing it tonight!" Jimin commented, but his eyes were on Rosé, smiling absently as her voice climbed higher to perfectly nail down the note.

"Nah, Lisa's the best, check out that swag!" Taehyung countered.

"Yeah, and that body roll, whoa!" Jungkook pretended to fan himself. Taehyung nudged him and they laughed.

Yoongi however, didn't laugh. His mouth was clamped shut, fists clenching underneath the table.

"Hey, lighten up hyung, we're not going to take your girl away," Taehyung teased, wiggling his eyebrows.

Yoongi spluttered. "What- she's not-we're not-"

"Yet," Jungkook filled in with a wink.

Jimin was grinning at him too, and Hobi suddenly seemed to be interested in the conversation as well.

"You think we didn't notice you keeping tabs on her? You totally have the hots for Blackpink's maknae, man" he snickered.

"He probably doesn't even realise, he's that whipped. Do you think will ever get himself a girlfriend?" Jungkook asked casually as Yoongi fumed next to him.

Taehyung stroked an imaginary long beard. "Well, that is rather a difficult question to answer indeed, my dear Kookie. See, girls these days are very particular, especially when it comes to...bedroom affairs, so to speak. And this grandpa here is a grumpy, tired old man with very poor stamina, so the most he can last is approximately-"

Yoongi clapped the back of his head as the rest of the members laughed, even Namjoon and Jin.

"Shut it maknae, have a bit of respect, you're giving me a headache"Yoongi hissed,"let me watch the show in peace."

Taehyung obeyed but out of the corner of his eye, Yoongi could see him winking and joking with Jungkook and Jimin, still laughing over his hyung's reaction.

Meanwhile, Blackpink had finished their last song and bowed to the audience.

Yoongi's brow furrowed with...was it worry? concern? disgust? as the crowd behind them booed the girls, although they had toned down somewhat from the first time. The other artists cheered for them instead, Red Velvet and Twice being the loudest. ( _It actually looked like they were competing on who could scream the loudest. Girls_ , Yoongi shook his head.)

He had his eyes on one girl in particular and when his eyes settled on her, he grinned.

She stood tall and proud on stage, eyes blazing, her sunny smile brushing aside the petty insults as if they were confetti. She bowed nonetheless and sent a flying kiss towards the audience, waving in the direction of the idols.

And then for one heart-stopping moment, her gaze landed on him. Yoongi felt his breath catch in his throat when he spied her toothy smile grow broader, her eyes sparkling.

Later that night in their dorm, Yoongi lay awake for a long time, and not because of Hobi's snoring.

A certain Thai beauty was occupying his mind, and she refused to leave.

She kept reappearing in his head in these last few weeks, images of her replaying even during the day, catching him off-guard with the funny feelings in his gut that were rapidly evolving into something bigger than flimsy butterflies.

Briefly, he remembered the maknaes' teasing from the awards. Would it be possible....

_Could he allow himself to indulge in a little fantasy?_

_Was she worth the risk?_

_No, rather the question should be..was he worthy of her?_

Now if anything, Min Yoongi was a hustler: he hustled all his life to achieve his aspirations and more than he had ever hoped to attain in the short span of time he had walked the earth. ( _He even became a part of KOMCA, for heaven's sake._ _The freaking KOMCA... he still sometimes woke Hobi up to ask him if it was all a dream._ )

Well, chasing after a new dream never hurt anyone, as long as he didn't lose sight of where he started as well as the important things he had now....

*********

"Oppa!" she called happily.

Yoongi turned as she came running into his embrace, her lovely chestnut hair flying behind her. He caught her, holding her tightly against his chest as he laughed. "Lisa-ya, what are they feeding you?" He teased, "You weigh a ton nowadays."

"Annniiiiyooooo," she protested, batting his arm. He pulled down his mask and edged closer.

"What-what are you doing? Somebody's gonna see us!" she whispered in panic, blinking rapidly.

He pressed a tender kiss on her forehead then hid his face again. "Is it wrong that I want to greet my darling girlfriend with a kiss? Especially on our anniversary?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. He smirked when she blushed, her eyes gleaming beneath her bangs. They walked hand in hand into a coffee shop, heading to a corner table secluded from the rest of the area. They ordered their usual drinks, although Yoongi relented and ordered a slice of red velvet cake like Lisa besides his Americano, much to her delight.

"Say ahh" she giggled, holding up a spoonful of cake. He obliged, opening his mouth expectantly.

And then she shoved the cake-loaded spoon into her own mouth, chuckling as his jaw dropped lower. Yoongi shook his head, trying to keep a hurt expression as he glared at her.

"How cruel of you, jagiya." he complained, holding his chest as though wounded.

"That's for calling me fat," she retorted, sticking her tongue out at him.

He rested his chin on his arms on the table top, just watching her tucking into the cake as though she was famished.

She didn't surprise or worry him anymore-he remembered being really concerned in the beginning, thinking she had been starving herself. She had laughed so much and then explained about her metabolism. She also didn't allow him to pay for the food every time and he was secretly relieved.

He remembered the time he was bowled over by her hearty appetite-once while strolling through the bustling market in Myeondong on a casual date, she devoured 2 tornado potato wrapped hotdogs, 2 fish cake bars, a carton of grilled squid, tteoboki, a couple of jjimandu, and one half of a corn-on-the-cob (apparently it hadn't been grilled properly, or so she claimed.)

Yoongi smiled as memories of the past few years with her flashed in his mind. Sometimes, he had to pinch himself to make sure it wasn't all some elaborate hallucination. But here they were, celebrating yet another anniversary after being together for several years.

"Oppa?"

He glanced up at the frown in her voice.

"Oppa, why aren't you eating?" she asked in concern.

"Oh, I'm not that hungry. You can eat mine too, if you like." he offered, pushing his plate towards her.

Lisa stopped the saucer midway, her hand resting on his. The simple silver ring he had given her for her birthday gleamed on her finger, a little thrill of happiness flooding his system every time he caught sight of it.

"You're in the midst of making a comeback," she said softly, "I hope you're eating well. You..look tired. We can go home already if you need to rest," she went on tentatively but he shook his head.

"No!" he said firmly. He took her hand, the one with the ring and kissed it. "Lisa, today is about us. I wouldn't miss it for anything. You..you mean so much to me, you make me so happy...you have no idea..."

"I think I do," she smiled, taking his hands, "maybe just as much as you make me happy..."

They gazed at each other, grinning like idiots.

"Umm...shall we...go for a quick walk? Before it gets dark?" he suggested.

"Eat your cake first."

He rolled his eyes. "Fine but help me out here-I can't really eat much sweets you know, I'm supposed to be on a diet."

"Pfft, excuses. Why don't you just admit that Mr Tough Guy Min Yoongi has a delicate stomach and will get indigestion just from eating cake?" Lisa giggled with a wink.

"It was just that one time," Yoongi groaned as she laughed.

They finished eating, paid the bill then walked out to a nearby park. They walked arm in arm, with Lisa huddling up close to Yoongi because a chill wind was blowing.

They reminisced about the past years spent together and talked quietly. They walked through the mostly empty park and so dared to lower their face masks while there weren't many people around. Yoongi liked it better when he could see her whole face whilst she was talking to him.

The trees were almost bare of their leaves, naked and shivering in the breeze as they passed underneath them.

"Oppa, why did you choose me?" Lisa asked suddenly, plumes of her breath materialising in the cold air.

He grinned because Lisa still calling him 'oppa' after all this time was adorable, but he wasn't complaining.

_Wait what? Adorable? Min Yoongi you're turning into a soft marshmallow._

"Hmmm.." he mused, to tease her," now just why did I choose you huh...I seem to have forgotten..."

"Yah!" she yelled indignantly, swatting at him.

He wrapped his arms around her slim waist from behind her, resting his chin on her head, inwardly thankful she wasn't wearing heels.

"Well, aside from your beauty," he replied huskily, inhaling the tangerine scent of her shampoo, "I think it was your passion that tipped the scales, and afterwards everything just clicked in place. But that fire you displayed in your performances.... I could see it just by looking in your eyes-you _love_ performing. You love what you do. And of course, you wouldn't have made it this far without that important factor in play."

"But my unnies have passion too," Lisa countered from beneath his chin, leaning back against his chest, "my Jennie unnie gave up the chance of becoming an attorney. She trained so hard and took everything in stride. And Jisoo unnie, she works twice as hard to keep up with us. Chaeyoung-ah, she doesn't show it, but I think she's the one who strives the most to prove herself."

"All very admirable," he agreed, twirling her around so that he was now looking deep into those mesmerising eyes. "But, Lisa, which of you four left her family at the mere age of 13 to travel far away to a foreign country? Which of you didn't even know the language of this new country, to the extent that she was isolated from everybody? Which of you stayed at the dorms during holidays, unable to visit her parents? Which girl," he asked softly, "slogged through it all with a smile on her face and never let anyone, or anything, take away the dream of debuting?"

Lisa lowered her gaze for a moment, shy. He cupped her face, the pad of his thumb brushing across her soft cheek.

"All four of you girls are unique," he admitted, "which is why you are so deserving of the recognition you have. But for me, you stand out, Lisa. Tell me, would a regular teenager accomplish all that you have achieved without the most powerful input of all-a passionate drive to attain one's dreams? Like I told you before, I admire you so much for that, jagi. You persevered, and look how far you've come."

She was listening to him quietly, reddening slightly at the pride in his voice.

He leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss on her forehead. "I don't think I would have lasted long if I had been in your place." he whispered, more to himself.

He still remembered those cold nights on the streets of Daegu, trying to make it on the underground scene, hoping for that big break that would earn him some money. He remembered the hunger pangs that used to afflict him, and then how he threw up right after eating when he got a hold of food. He remembered the dark voices he chased away, but not quite stamped out. They were always there, whispering at the back of his head.

Even now, he could distinctly hear them, the familiar shadows threatening to get a grip on him if he so much as let his guard down.

And then those dark shadows dissipated just as quickly as Lisa looped her arms around his neck, snuggling closer against his chest.

" _You_ madeit too," she murmured softly, "you're stronger than you think, don't forget that. You clawed your way up from the dirt, you fought your way up from scratch. Fighting against all odds. Fighting against your own self even. If that's not a heck of a success story, I don't know what is." She lifted her head up, her loving gaze making his heartbeat quicken. "I like fighters with a passion too."

Yoongi didn't know what he did in his previous life to be graced with this remarkable woman.

He didn't regret bribing her manger to get a hold of her number.

He didn't regret waiting for her, agonising over whether YG would give him permission to date her, especially considering the serious accusations Blackpink was facing and that was threatening to jeopardise their very existence.

His refusal to back down regarding Lisa initially made everything awkward between the two CEO's. However, it was practically smooth sailing once her boss realised Yoongi was serious about dating her.

Yoongi didn't regret the non-stop teasing from the maknaes, or the rumours still swirling in Blackpink's wake.

It would be a lie to say that both of them hadn't been worried about their respective groups in the beginning. There had been some misunderstandings too, but it was all in the past. He was overjoyed that she hadn't given up, despite the obstacles set in their path.

Yoongi didn't have a single regret from the moment he fell in love with Lisa.

With just her comforting presence, her playful, lovable antics and her steady support, she had managed to brighten his daily existence as if she were the sun itself.

"Happy anniversary Lisa," he said softly, bringing her closer.

She smiled, that beautiful sunny smile that reached up to her eyes, and he saw a whole galaxy of stars in them.

"Happy anniversary, Yoongi," she answered just as tenderly.

She rolled on tiptoes to meet his mouth as his lips descended on hers, fitting so effortlessly like two pieces of a puzzle come together. They kissed slowly and softly, savouring each other's warmth, conveying a thousand unspoken emotions through their kiss.

Yoongi was kissing the sun itself.

That was the only explanation for why his body-every nerve, every vessel, every fibre of his being-was a blazing inferno. She broke the kiss first with a chirky laugh, coming back in for a peck. He held her, kissing her more deeply and she responded, cupping his jaw.

"I could do this all day," he breathed at length.

"And all night." he added with a knowing grin. She hit his arm, blushing crimson as he laughed.

"Let's get you home, sweetheart," he said, snaking an arm round her waist to pull her to his side. He had noticed her stifling a tired yawn as they walked along the path. She must be exhausted, after all Blackpink were training harder now that their comeback was in a few months' time.

Lisa snuggled close, sighing contentedly. "Yeah..."

Later, tucked next to him on the taxi seat and holding onto her anniversary present (a pair of rose-gold earrings she had been eyeing for some time), she sleepily mumbled: "Thank you Yoongi...."

He glanced down at her long frame, her head resting comfortably against his shoulder. Yoongi brushed a kiss on the top of her head.

"No... _thank you._ " he replied quietly,"thank you, for being in my life."

He was mildly surprised when she slipped a hand into his, because she was usually more afraid to initiate contact in the presence of people. Her fingers stroked over the anniversary present she had gifted him which he had worn immediately—a small silver ring engraved with a simple heart and their anniversary date.

"I love you," Lisa said softly, barely above a whisper.

But Yoongi heard, and it was enough. He squeezed her hand.

"I love you too, my star."


	2. Next Time

To say Yoongi was pissed would be an understatement, as the rest of his bandmates could tell just by hearing him speak one sentence.

"Open this damn door!" he snarled through the intercom. His members glanced at each other, confused as to why he simply didn't let himself in.

The maknaes darted out of his way the moment he stomped into the dorm, slamming the door shut with uncharacteristic force.

"Yoongi--"

"Not now, hyung!" he snapped at Jin and marched to his room.

He never snapped at Jin.

"Yoongi, is everything okay?" Hobi was, as usual, blissfully unaware of the dark tension that enveloped the room.

"Do I," Yoongi hissed, turning back, "effing look okay to you?"

"Uh...no?"

Yoongi slammed the door, rattling the windowpanes.

A thick blanket of silence descended and the older boys glanced at each other as Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung tiptoed out of the kitchen.

"What did he say?"

"Is it because of Lisa?"

"Did they break up?"

Namjoon stood up from the couch, shutting his book with a snap. "You better leave him alone to cool down. He hasn't been in the most cheeriest of moods lately...I think they're experiencing some bumps."

"But...they can't break up," Jungkook chewed his lip worriedly, "he promised he'd ask Lisa to introduce me to Rosé."

"Well dayum, you got your priorities straight, Kookie," Taehyung rebutted sarcastically, "we wouldn't want your chances to woo miss Rosie posie go flying out of the window now, do we?"

"What? You said you wanted to talk with Jennie too--"

"Yeah yeah yeah la la la laaaaaaaa," Taehyung interrupted hastily, "we gotta focus on hyung right now, he's the priority. Bros before hoes, am I right?"

"They are not," growled Yoongi's voice, "hoes."

All six whirled to find the short rapper glaring at them. They hadn't noticed the door opening. His eyes looked oddly pink before he averted his gaze.

"Go yell somewhere else... leave me to sleep in peace. And maknaes, if you want to talk to those girls, man up and do it yourselves. Although if you only see them as hoes, they sure as hell are better off without you."

He slammed the door again.

>

AD 1 ( _Aftermath, Day 1)_

Yoongi groaned when he remembered, and rolled in his bed, avoiding the sunlight filtering through the blinds. His heart twitched painfully, because the sun reminded him of Lisa.

Scratch that, literally _everything_ was reminding him of Lisa.

On his walk back to the dorm the day before, he was in agony.

The streets, the clouds in the sky, the sun, the trees, the birds, the street vendors, the smell of the food, the people, the stores, the bus seat--every single thing was imprinted with a memory of her, and it was killing him.

The terrifying thing was that they hadn't even broke up and he was experiencing _this_ level of pain.

Well, at least he was hoping they hadn't broken up.

Yoongi was glad BTS were currently in their rest period, because he sure as hell was not budging from his room to face his members, or sing in front of crowds.

He just couldn't.

He'd break down and blubber like some twat, remembering her cheering at their concerts, and her congratulatory kisses, quick pecks that still made him swell with pride.

He had committed a mistake. A grave error. 

His sin? He had made her cry. 

His little ball of sunshine had actually cried in front of him, _because of him_ and they weren't tears of joy.

An invisible knife stabbed his heart, cleanly slicing it in two when he spotted the fractured expression in her eyes.

He had been irritated and frustrated, the accumulation of months of stress. Bang-PD was pressing him to finalise his songs, because Namjoon and J-hope had already submitted theirs, well ahead of the deadline. 

Add to that some stupid bureaucratic tangles that had him wasting hours at a time phoning offices and talking with gormless morons as he tried to resolve his situation, and you had a recipe for an imminent eruption. (You'd think being a superstar idol, everything would come easy but when they meant equality in this country, they really meant it: shitty service for all.)

In brief, he had been running on a short fuse, and Lisa got the end of the stick. 

She did her best to mask the hurt but he saw her ducking her head and not even her peaked cap could hide her tears.

"Oh ****" he cursed and then slapped himself because he had striven not to curse in front of her. 

_Way to go, Min, way to go._

"Lisa--"

"It's okay, I'll stop now," she mumbled. 

The remaining pieces of his heart dropped into the pit of his stomach. 

She had been happily prattling like an excited kid about this new line of makeup she was modelling for and the upcoming fansign she was nervous about, and he just had to cut the party with a curt: "Can you just shut up? You're giving me a headache."

The moment the words fell out of his mouth, he realised it was too late.

She stared at him dumbly for a moment, because he was usually always interested in hearing her out, one of the reasons she appreciated him so much.

"Lisa—"

"I-I'm sorry if I bothered you, oppa" she said shakily, "I....guess I'll see you another time? You should go rest...."

He wasn't going to let her go like that, not with the space between them swelling up like a balloon, distancing them further.

"No, Lis, wait...please..."

But she had already gone, slipping away through the crowd of market-goers like sand through his fingers.

He had stormed back to his dorm, berating himself loudly. He didn't even notice the startled bystanders he passed by: he was too angry with himself to care. 

Yoongi fell on his bed after scolding his members, and he didn't stir until next morning. With his eyes shut tight and a rock lodged in his throat, his mind replayed the exact moment that her face crumpled.

He had vowed with himself he'd never make her cry.

He'd succeeded to overturn that vow within the space of fourteen months.

Yoongi wasn't one to cry, but his eyes just wouldn't stop leaking all night.

>

_AD 2_

"Yoongi, I think you're being a bit over-dramatic."

Yoongi hadn't budged from his room all through AD 1, except to grab a stash of cup ramen and retreat back to his studio.

If he wasn't going anywhere, he might as well work.

All he ended up doing was binging on the noodles until he was physically sick, lounging about in his swivel chair and scrolling through his phone, smiling nostalgically at his photo gallery which was packed with photos of her, her and himself, and more photos of her.

"Whipped," his bandmates had snickered when he had left the phone lying around one day and that devil of a golden maknae had managed to guess the password, thus adding 'Hacker Extraordinaire' to his long list of accomplishments ('Oh it wasn't that hard hyung. So cliche really, putting your girlfriend's birthday as the pass code.')

Come AD 2, Yoongi woke up after an entire night agonising whether to contact her and apologise properly, or phone her and beg her to forgive him. 

She must hate him now. He really was the worst.

_Why did she even agree to date him anyway? What did he even offer her? Did he make her happy after all?_

His shadows were ecstatic, gleefully jumping on the opportunity to drag him down and for once, he surrendered to the dark thoughts swirling in his mind, clouding every good memory he had of her.

There was one thing he learned about the darkness that he now carried everywhere with him: it never truly goes away. You just learn to compromise and bargain with it, keeping it starved as much as possible but occasionally allowing it to roam. It may be unhealthy, but sometimes, it was comforting to wallow in self-pity and misery. 

The trick was knowing when enough was enough, and Yoongi usually had a firm grip on reality: he would promise himself only one day of weakness but tomorrow was a new day. 

It was how he survived his depression: _He would hang on, for just one more day, because there was no knowing what he could miss out in the future._

But try as he might, this time, the shadows had latched on tight, unwilling to be banished back to their prison at the back of his head. And Yoongi felt that maybe, just maybe, they could stay for a little while longer, until he felt stronger--

"YOONGI!"

He jolted in his chair, his eyes settling on Jin who stood before him, hands akimbo.

"Did you even hear what I said? Jinjja!" sighed his hyung. "Who would have thought Min Yoongi could fall so hard? Aissh, Lisa must really be one special girl. All the fangirls will be out for blood once they discover about you two."

"If there's still an us," Yoongi mumbled downcast. He straightened in his chair, grimacing as his spine popped from sleeping in an awkward position over his desk. "How did you come in here? I thought I locked the door....don't tell me you guys picked the--"

"It was open Yoongi," Jin said quietly, "you didn't even lock up. You're too out of it to focus and it's worrying me. You don't even know that I've been talking to you for the past ten minutes."

"I'm fine, just working on..stuff." Yoongi turned away, fiddling with the keyboard. "Shut the door behind you when you leave."

Jin realised his dongsaeng wasn't in the mood to talk but he wasn't deterred.

"Fine, but I'll only say this: so you fell out. It might seem like a big deal but Yoongi, here's the thing--I think you're being a bit of a brat about this here. I don't know who's in the right or wrong but there's nothing that a phone call or even better, straight up meeting her won't clear up. You guys care for each other. I've never seen you so committed before...as for Lisa...Jisoo has been telling me a lot about how her dongsaeng has been that little bit extra cheerful ever since she started dating you."

Yoongi lifted his head. "Jisoo and you are....?"

"Talking...yeah," the other man smiled sheepishly, "but please keep it a secret. It's early days. Besides, their sajangnim is a scary man, I'm not ready to ask for his permission to court her."

"But enough about me," Jin continued.

Yoongi raised an eyebrow, because Jin ceasing to speak about himself in the midst of a conversation was just about as likely as the existence of blue melons.

"If I were you, I'd settle this little tiff you have right away. I'll take my leave now, and good luck."

Yoongi nodded and then sighed when the door clicked shut.

If only it was that easy...Jin didn't understand yet.

Seeing Lisa cry, and moreover cry because of him, hurt Yoongi deeply, even if it wasn't anything truly despicable like cheating (he shuddered) but it still weighed down on his conscience.

And he had no idea how to make it up to her. He was too ashamed to show his face in front of her right now. 

Yes, he admitted it, he was probably over thinking as usual, but the guilt choking him made him restless and nervous.

He would wait, for just a little while longer, until he collected his thoughts.

He would wait another day.

>

By AD3, he didn't feel any better.

If anything, the guilt feelings had gotten worse.

_You're a sad, pathetic excuse of a boyfriend she's probably waiting for you to make a move you utter spineless coward what in actual hell do you expect you're the one who hurt her, you disgusting son of a--_

"Hyung?"

"What?" he rasped through the door, now securely locked.

"Manager hyung wants to know when you're getting out of there."

Now more than ever, Yoongi wished he could hibernate.

"Soon. Go away I'm busy."

He heard hushed mumbles and then Jungkook piped up again.

"Oh by the way, we have a practice schedule sometime today." 

Yoongi frowned. He was positive they hadn't had anything planned as a group so what was the maknae on about?

"We don't have anything today Kook, if it's a ploy to get me to watch you lift weights, go find somebody else."

"Hyung, they announced this extra dance practice just this morning, that's why manager hyung wants to know when you'll be out. We'll all be heading there for warmups soon. The earlier you get out, the better."

Yoongi glanced at his watch. It was almost noon but he didn't feel hungry. "I'll join you in 30 minutes, how's that?"

"Uhhhmm, how about an hour?"

"Whatever, okay," he dismissed, turning back to Youtube and browsing aimlessly through the fancams of Blackpink. The Lisa-focused ones, obviously.

"Awesome! See you hyung!" 

Yoongi grunted and settled back in his chair to watch his girlfriend dance.

When was the last time he watched her dance? He'd been so caught up with his job lately. Had he neglected her? He hoped she was still eating well--she had looked so skinny back when they debuted. Beautiful nonetheless.

Yoongi drifted in a daydream and was rudely awakened by the alarm he had set on the timer.

Grumbling, he logged out of his computer and stood up, joints popping. He had been sitting down for too long and the sensation of stepping on pins had him flinching with every step.

Maybe this dance practice was a good idea. He could do with some exercise and clear his mind a bit.

Yoongi wandered to the practice room, frowning at the total silence from within. It was deathly quiet, as if the whole place was holding its breath.

Warily, Yoongi pulled down the knob and peered cautiously around the door, expecting the maknaes to surprise him.

The room was deserted. He checked his watch to make sure he was on time and then checked that it was their own practice room but there was no doubt about it.

So they bummed out after all.

Yoongi sighed, shutting the door behind him and walked in front of the wall-length mirror.

A pale, unkempt figure with bags under his eyes gazed back.

_Min Yoongi, you look like shit._

And then his eyes fell on the small piano at the back, the white keys gleaming invitingly.

As if in a trance, Yoongi shuffled over, plopping down before adjusting the stool and settling more comfortably.

"It's been a while, old friend," he murmured apologetically as he stroked the keys. His fingers curved elegantly and he started playing, sweet melancholic notes echoing around him.

After gauging the acoustics of the room, Yoongi had specifically asked for the piano to be placed in that corner, since the notes resounded off the walls to produce a richer sound.

Yoongi played from memory, losing himself in the technique, concentrating on pressing down at exactly the right moments, projecting all his emotions in the music that would move even the most stone-hearted person.

He was so immersed in the music flowing around him that he didn't notice the door opening.

_CRASH!_

Yoongi's hands slammed down on the piano in shock, notes jarring.

He glanced behind him in annoyance.

His jaw dropped upon spotting a leggy, orange-haired girl frantically trying to lift a couple of dumbbells unto the shelf.

"I'm-I'm sorry!" she cried,"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bother you, I'll just put these back and...nngng" she grunted with effort to lift the weights.

He rushed over to help her, hitting his knee against the stool and toppling it in the process but that didn't matter right now. 

Right now what mattered was Lisa, and she was going to hurt herself lifting Jungkook's 20kg dumbells.

"Heh, you're strong," she chuckled as he easily put the weights back in their place.

Yoongi hid a proud smirk. He didn't show off his strength much, but it would be a lie to dismiss that he didn't put effort in developing his core strength.

They stood there grinning at each other before Yoongi remembered the harsh manner he had addressed her the last time they met.

"Lisa..."

"What were you playing?" she asked conversationally, drifting towards his baby. She ran her long fingers across the keys and for a moment he stood entranced, seeing his two most beloved possessions together.

"It was beautiful. Oppa, play it again?" Lisa asked hopefully, eyes bright and child-like. "Chaeyoung plays it too but I forgot its name."

He cleared his throat. "Oh, it's by Yiruma. _River flows in You."_

He stood the stool upright and dragged another one next to him, inviting her to sit. She obeyed, keeping slightly away from his arms to give him space, although he would have preferred her leaning against his shoulder.

He started playing again, aware of her gaze following the fluid motion of his fingers dancing across the white keys. 

"Doesn't Rosé show you how to play?" he asked at length. 

"It's hard," she sighed, "it's not the same as a guitar. I only know how to play one song."

"Oh? Show me."

"After you finish," she promised, and he had to carry on playing. 

He was dying to turn around and look her in the eye and apologise because the tension in the room was growing, and he could feel it choking him. It wouldn't do to keep on ignoring the elephant in the room.

She must have come here to BigHit for some reason and he's rather find out sooner than later.

_But what if she had come to break things off? Maybe she realised she was better off without him._

Yoongi stumbled, the notes clashing and off-key. He came to a stop, breathing heavily.

"Oh it's over already?" Lisa asked without missing a beat, "my turn!"

She lightly brushed his hands away and then started playing that annoying birthday theme. 

The song grated on his nerves but watching her suck her breath in concentration as she did her best to play made him smile. 

"Aiissh jinjja!" she exclaimed in exasperation as she stumbled over the final progression of the piece.

"Not bad" he told her, "I see the making of a pianist in you. Yiruma is quaking in his shoes."

He chuckled when she shot him a patronising look.

"Here, let me show you a better song. And let's work on your technique too."

He motioned for her hands and she reached out shyly as he positioned her fingers, instructing her to curve them.

"Imagine that you're holding an apple as you play," he explained,"that's the way your fingers should arch over the keys, nice and relaxed. Not claw-like and stiff, because then you'd get a stabbing effect, and it's more difficult to move fluidly. Also, don't let your palms rest on the edge of the piano--it should move lightly, following your fingers, like so..."

He demonstrated with a few arpeggios.

"Okay, now the song I had in mind should be easy enough without the sheets for you to learn. And I'm sure you've heard it, check this."

Yoongi dashed a few quick notes, Lisa bobbing along.

"Oh oh oh oh!" she gasped, flapping her arms excitedly, " _Heart and Soul,_ yasssss!"

"Yeah?" he smiled, "okay, so you put this finger here, over C..."

He showed her several times, patiently positioning her fingers again and again, even chuckling at her adorable pouting face.

She finally managed to play through the shortened version of the piece, albeit with stilted jerky movements and a little stiffer than Yoongi liked, but she had learned it nonetheless.

"Yah! I did it!" she cheered.

"Yup!" He agreed proudly.

He barely had time to register before her arms engulfed him in a hug.

"Thank you!" She gushed, "Chaeyoung-ah will be so pleased!"

His mind had gone blank, the cogs and wheels in his brain grinding to an absolute halt.

He returned her embrace with an awkward pat on her back, expecting her to release him.

And he suddenly remembered he hadn't washed in two days.

_Oh sh—_

"Yoongi?" Her voice was hushed.

"Yeah?"he whispered. He felt that speaking aloud would ruin the sanctity of the moment.

"Forgive me. I'm sorry about last time," Lisa pulled away from their hug, her eyes tinged with apology "I should have realised you were tired and not in the mood--"

"What? No!"he exclaimed, "Lisa, I'm the one who should be saying sorry, it's not your fault at all, I shut you down so I'm the one who should be asking for forgiveness."

He clutched her hands. "I'm sorry for not contacting you, for not running after you to ask for forgiveness, I'm sorry for not being there 100% of the time. I never meant to hurt you, or make you cry...because seeing you cry makes me cry too. It makes me hate myself so much..."

Her cool fingertips grazed his jaw, caressing his cheek. She tilted his head up to gaze into his eyes. He could make out dim stars in her doe-like orbs, distant but still there.

"You mustn't pin all the blame on yourself," she whispered hoarsely," it hurts me to see you kicking yourself to the ground because of me, when I'm not entirely blameless either...."

Lisa took a deep breath. "I'm sorry for not noticing you were stressed and just kept on talking about myself. Not just about the last time, but also the previous dates. If I had been a good girlfriend, I would have asked you to share your problems with me. Together we could come up with a solution and if not...well, it's always better when somebody hears you out, don't you think? So later, I want to hear what's bothering you, because I want to help as much as I can, araso?

He could only nod. "And you're going to tell me all about Moonshot and the fansign--I'm actually really proud YG is letting you do all that promotion for the brand. You deserve no less."

She brightened at that, bobbing her head vigorously and he gave himself a mental pat on the back.

"I'm sorry for running away like some pathetic idiot," she added contritely.

"If there's an idiot here, it's me," Yoongi said immediately, "because I should have phoned you right away. And next time, I'll tell you straight to your face. I'll get on my knees in the dirt and apologise a thousand times over because Lisa, you don't deserve to be treated the way I treated you and I wish I could be a better boyfriend--"

She pressed a finger to his lips. "You're perfect the way you are, don't let anybody else, or even yourself, say otherwise."

Lisa was well aware of his hateful demons that came out to play during his moments of insecurity and it pained her that now, she could be one of the triggers for their release.

He nodded obediently then lowered his gaze."I hope there won't be a next time though..."

Lisa smiled gently, arranging herself so she was now sitting close to Yoongi, snuggling into his hoodie.

"There will probably be many 'next times' oppa," she replied sagely,"main thing is we work out the problem together...just like how you taught me to play now."

She felt the vibrations of his shoulder against her cheek as he chuckled. "Aiish since when did my little Lisa grow so wise? But...you're probably right. Now I know what to do, when a 'next time' comes...."

"So do I!" she retorted, not to be outdone. She sits back in satisfaction when his deep laugh resounds throughout the room.

Yoongi started playing again. With Lisa leaning on his shoulder and the music transporting him to a world of his own creation, it was enough: he felt at peace and ready to take on anything.

He still wondered how Lisa had come to BigHit and suspected his members had set them up (he had to hand it to that maknae: Kookie deserved an Oscar.)

But Yoongi wasn't complaining about the fact he had been hoodwinked. He was even considering rewarding them with a trip to their favourite restaurant when he heard a low, contented sigh.

"Oppa?"

"Mhm?"

"We're good now, yeah?"

The smile on his face broadened. "Yeah. For sure."

"Pinky promise?" Lisa asked seriously, straightening up on her stool. He stopped playing to face her properly.

Yoongi's heart melted at the sight of the adorable girl sitting in front of him, her expression solemn. Yet there was a hint of playfulness in the way her lips quirked up at the corners.

She held up her little finger, waiting.

Yoongi leaned forward, raising up a small finger of his own, connecting them. His eyes flicked up to his girlfriend, mirroring her smile.

"Pinky promise."


	3. Be Careful

If somebody had gone up to an impulsive, teenage Min Yoongi and informed him that one day, he'd be standing in front of a backstage dressing room with anxiety levels skyrocketing waiting to speak with a female idol he couldn't get off his mind, he would have punched them in the face for screwing around.

Although mild-tempered, Min Yoongi didn't take kindly to people who screwed around, especially people like those shady characters that populated the back alleys of Daegu.

Those vultures were always on the lookout to cash in on innocent passers-by with promises of once-in-a-lifetime deals and phony fortune telling powers.

So to actually find himself in the said situation was beyond ironic: it was extremely hilarious.

Or so Taehyung thought when Yoongi announced he would attempt to talk to Blackpink's maknae, Lisa Manoban.

"Mark your calendars everyone--and what's the time? Grandpa Yoongi has finally decided he's getting back into the dating game!"

"About time, hyung." Hobi teased.

"Kookie, he beat you to it, what you gonna do now? You need to find a girl ASAP!"

"Let's bet on how long he'll take to ask her out" Jimin said brightly.

"Do you think her sajangnim will send him packing? I think they're still under a dating ban too."

Yoongi sighed, regretting his decision to be transparent with his members righr away.

_Why did he have to blab?_

The answer came sooner than he expected when a warm hand dropped on his shoulder. He looked up to find his leader grinning down at him but his eyes were serious.

"I'm happy for you, hyung," Namjoon said quietly, "be careful."

Two words. _Be careful._

_Translation: don't get hurt...again._

Yoongi swallowed.

Once upon a time, he had fallen in love.

Tumbled head over heels, _h_ _opelessly_ in love.

He didn't look it, but Min Yoongi was a romantic sap, as Namjoon could attest during the years they shared their living quarters together.

Think roses and chocolates, nightly serenades, song compositions dedicated to his muse, photos to commemorate the time he spent with his girlfriend, picnics, walks by the river bank, bicycle rides, festival outings...all the romantic tropes done to death, Yoongi cared not a jot and proceeded to be the perfect k-drama boyfriend.

He was at the girl's beck and call. He loved deeply and unconditionally. He smiled and laughed. And he had good reason to. 

It was the most euphoric feeling in the world: the knowledge that out there, someone's heart was beating just for him.

And then just as soon as they started, Yoongi's second love (his first would always be the piano) came to an abrupt conclusion.

If his relationship had been a movie, the title credits had barely finished rolling before it ended unceremoniously.

It was a bolt out of the blue, like an unexpected cliffhanger that leaves a sour taste in your mouth.

Yoongi still recalled the shock waves--multiple jolts of electricity travelling all over his body in a tsunami-like fashion--after the dreaded words fell from her cold lips.

**"We need to break up."**

Not _should_. Not _maybe_.

We _need_ to break up _ **.**_

_As if his very presence was toxic._   
_As if it was killing her._   
_As if the mere sight of him was repulsive and repugnant._

No reason was given, no explanation whatsoever, which was what devastated him the most. It left him wondering for days, weeks, months, years on end: _What did I do wrong?_

Of course, he moved on. He picked himself up and trudged on. It's something he had mastered over the years.

So Life had dealt him another blow to the face. What else was new? 

_Dust your shoulders and walk on, Min Yoongi._

If it only was that easy...he could honestly say it wasn't.

He pretended it was, for the sake of getting on with life. As the years passed, he looked back with a new perspective and recognised the cracks in what he thought had been a relationship destined to be eternal. He even found it in himself to laugh wryly at his younger, innocent self.

Music kept him occupied for the better part of the next few years.

Once his dongsaengs entered the scene and they grew busier with every year that their fanbase grew, his preoccupations with his love life were all but forgotten.

Until _she_ came along...

Yoongi now smiled up at Namjoon. "Thank you. I'll try to talk to her first so don't get all excited for nothing."

"Eh you're giving up already? We might as well not bet on you getting together then." Taehyung winked. 

"When are you going to talk with her?" This was Jin, squinting thoughtfully. "You need to be careful--there are reporters everywhere and if anybody catches wind of what you're up to..."

Yoongi sighed. "I know, I know.... I'm going to do it tomorrow, after our performance."

It was almost as if Fate had handed him the golden card: both their groups were busy with comeback promotions, thus guaranteeing a potential set-up for a meeting at some show or other.

"Hyung," Jungkook spoke suddenly,"how come you're so...determined? I've...I don't think I've ever seen you like this. What do you even see in her?"

"I like how she performs," Yoongi replied without missing a beat. 

_And maybe it wasn't just that..._

Briefly, the conversation he had shared backstage with a crying Lisa when Blackpink was involved in that stupid rumour a few months back replayed in his head and a smile took over his features.

_Her eyes expressed every emotion. So raw and passionate and....alive._

_Maybe it's because he had been through so much that he had all but forgotten..._

_Yet he could have sworn he spied a gleam of innocence in her teary eyes. A sense of child-like wonder and it was captivating._

_Beautiful._

_It took him right back to his_ _young naive self who believed in clichés_ _like love and all that jazz._

_Jeez,_ _he sounded like some reminiscing ahjussi right now..._

"We've lost him again..."

"Hey hyung you in there?"

"Yoongi this is your leader speaking, blink if you can hear me."

Yoongi slowly blinked at them before slipping away into his room and shutting the door, ignoring the wolf whistles. He threw himself on the bed, covering his face with his arm.

_Be careful._

Was it just a mere infatuation after all?

Was this going to be a repeat of what happened all those years ago?

Was he really attracted to her, or simply admiring how she gave her all for each and every performance?

And does she even like, know he exists? _Of course she does Min, what kind of stupid question is that?_

Not to mention there was that four year gap between them....maybe she'd be disgusted. Maybe she'd think he was perverted to hit on her.

Maybe...maybe...

Yoongi groaned and clapped both hands to his cheeks. _Focus._

He was older now. Wiser.

He should be able to deal with his feelings more maturely, like the adult he was. And after all, he was merely going to start by talking with her, if he could do that at all.

But he was determined: he was going to try.

The fact that she had been constantly hovering at the edge of his consciousness for the past months ever since their conversation backstage must mean something.

And he was genuinely interested in Lisa. He watched Blackpink's vlives. She made him smile with her crackhead personality, so much so that his face ended up aching at times.

He stalked their instagram account. Her duality in the pictures always amazed him.

He watched their pre-debut videos on Youtube. He had learned all about her background and history (he felt a bit guilty for this but in his defence, it was all over on the internet anyway, along with the utter bull and crap Dispatch pinned on Blackpink. It had his blood boiling but at least her agency had handled the damage somewhat.)

So yes, something was definitely there.

The question was whether these feelings could be reciprocated. Whether these feelings could blossom into something more.

Moreover he was wary of trusting again.

_Was she worth it?_

_Or rather...was he worthy of her?_

_*_

He was seriously annoyed with himself.

Barely five minutes after he somehow found Blackpink's dressing room without getting lost or bumping into any staff, he now grew aware that he was starting to sweat.

_What the actual hell_ _Min Yoongi? Pull yourself together._

By his count, he only sweated on three instances: after a killer workout, before and during a performance, and lastly, the time his mother busted down his door and caught him watching porn ( _The only time he had just peeked on a website out of curiosity_ , he swore on his dead grandfather, but his mother wasn't buying any of it.)

Usually out of anxiety, he would chew on his lip until it turned bloody....but sweating? This was perplexing indeed.

_And she hadn't even shown up yet._

He shoved his hands in his pockets and leaned back against the wall, tapping his foot to an internal rhythm.

Tap tap tap...Tap tap tap...ttap ttap Tap...

He grunted in irritation when he realised his timing was out of whack. He wasn't thinking straight.

Yoongi suddenly grew alert when he heard chattering voices and then it came, clear as a bell-- _her_ loud giggle.

_Showtime._

He suddenly realised how stupid he looked waiting here, without even preparing what to say once they approached. And they will probably be accompanied with an entourage of managers, stylists and whatnot too.

_Now was not the time to panic, play it cool, Min, play it cool play it--_

And Blackpink appeared before him, decked out in their stage costumes. He was quite awestruck for a moment before collecting his thoughts that were running haywire, inwardly scolding himself for being this distracted.

Rosé spotted him first and uttered a squeak before scuttling to hide behind her Jisoo unnie, probably shy because of the rather short dress she was wearing.

Jisoo and Jennie looked similarly stumped upon recognising him. He could almost see the question form in their mind: _What is the genius rapper of BTS doing outside our dressing room?_ (Okay maybe he added the genius part but otherwise their faces said it all.)

Lisa on the other hand broke out into a broad grin and bowed. "Suga sunbaenim!"

Bringing up the rear was, as he predicted, a coterie of their staff.

"Girls what's the hold up? Come on we have a schedule to adhere to--" their manager-unnie stopped short, blinking rapidly behind her glasses when she spotted Yoongi.

He cleared his throat. "Uh... annyeonghaseyo."

"Can we help you, Suga-ssi?" Their manager said stiffly. He glimpsed the female staff giggling and stealing glances at him. The familiar anxiety of being surrounded by strangers was starting to kick in.

He took a deep breath. _Now or never._

"If...if it's not too much trouble," he muttered," I'd like to have a word with Lisa-ssi privately ....please...."

_Did he sound desperate?_

They all looked taken aback. Lisa's mouth dropped and she pointed at herself, as if there were a hundred other Lisas around them and he had specifically chosen her.

"Uh..." their manager now sounded uncertain, "I'm not sure that is possible Suga-ssi, the girls need to prepare for their next event, so I'm afraid we need to get going..."

"I won't be long." _Definitely desperate._ "It's for a possible future collab, I'm very interested in collaborating with her..."

Immediately, his audience's jaw dropped and he wanted to hit himself on the head but his mouth wasn't finished spewing nonsense.

"It's purely on a professional basis, for business purposes..."

"Then you can speak with me."

"Oppa," Lisa called nervously as her manager-oppa strode up and crossed his arms, eyeing Yoongi suspiciously.

"You can all go in. I shall negotiate with Suga-ssi myself, don't worry. Go in, Lisa you as well."

They stared at each other for a beat longer, with Lisa definitely looking anxious as she watched him and her manager square up to each other. Yoongi distinctly heard her members' hushed voices immediately pounce on her as the door shut behind them.

"Well, Suga-ssi first of all, annyeonghaseyo, I am Lisa's manager." said the man as he bowed. "How can I help you?"

Yoongi hadn't anticipated this turn of events but maybe he could still make it work, if he sold his story well enough.

"Umm...this is purely my own initiative, nothing to do with my agency...but I am interested in a possible future collaboration with Lisa-ssi, so I was wondering if maybe I could...have her contact details in case such an opportunity cropped up..."

He could practically hear Taehyung screaming at him: LAME.

"Suga-ssi, you understand that such matters cannot be simply discussed between artists themselves, unless they are independent and work on their own terms?" Her manager said kindly and Yoongi had to admit he was speaking sense: he hated the fact that their artistry was owned by their companies and basically contracts restricted any individual collaborations in between idols, unless agreed upon by their respective agencies.

Yoongi lowered his head. 

"Yeah but I still wondered if perhaps I could..."

"I'm very sorry, but I'm not allowed to do that. YG sajangnim was very clear about the rules, Suga-ssi..."

Yoongi tasted blood and realised he had bitten through his cheek.

Right now, he was not Suga of BTS, Suga the superstar k-pop idol, Suga the genius rapper famed for his tongue technology.

Right now he was Min Yoongi, a young man facing down the guardian of the girl he had fallen for. The outcome was looking extremely bleak as both men stood in silence, waiting for the other to make their next move.

Yoongi cursed himself for having absolutely nothing else to add or embellish to his story. So much for love conquers all, what a cliche, he hated himself, he was such a pathetic loser, not even able to man up and use his superstar millionaire status to assert dominance--

_Millionaire._

Yoongi hid a smile. "Say uhm...sir....how is it... looking after Lisa? I heard she's a bit of a handful."

The man blinked in surprise. "Uh...it's okay? She's...she's alright. A little headstrong, especially when she's hungry and wants to go to the store to buy food...but she's a good kid. She really takes care of her unnies too. The only downside is when sometimes I have to accompany her at 4 in the morning to raid some store. She has quite a big appetite, you see. Or when she goes shopping, it takes forever!" the man reminisced, smiling. Yoongi smiled too--it was obvious this manager guy genuinely cared enough about Lisa to forsake his sleep without grumbling too much about it.

"Mhmm...and I suppose you get paid quite well for that, am I right?" Yoongi probed. "I mean, having to forgo your sleep for a girl's cravings...can't be easy. I myself feel like killing my members if they start acting boisterous at such an early hour."

"Don't we all,"laughed the man and Yoongi leaned back against the wall with a chuckle, relaxed and at ease, as if he had known this man all his life and was sharing a frank conversation with him in a bar.

He may have despised those shady characters on the back streets of Daegu, but their tricks to ease into a conversation with anyone that caught their attention, coupled with Tae's coaching, proved to be invaluable in emergency situations, such as right now.

"But sajangnim is a generous man," Lisa's manager continued after a brief pause," he pays us very well for our work. After all, the girls are his treasures, and no expense is spared to provide them with anything they could possibly desire..."

"Except for comebacks and proper promotions..." Yoongi mumbled.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh nothing. So...salary wise...are we looking at like, at least, 6 digit figures?"

The man finally seemed to have cottoned on. "Why the sudden interest, Suga-ssi?"

Yoongi took a deep breath and played his final hand. "This may not be morally ethical but sir, I would like to pay you double your wage to allow me time to speak with Lisa-ssi."

There was a heavy silence, interrupted only by faint chatter and laughter from within the dressing room.

Lisa's manager glanced at the door then at him, then back at the door, then back at him.

"So you're bribing me."

"Yes," said Yoongi honestly. There was no point in denying.

"The famous rapper of the industry's underdog idol group, trying to cosy up to one of the Big 3 now huh?"

Yoongi gritted his teeth. "That is NOT my intention, _sir_ "he said, practically spitting out the last word.

"Why do you really want to talk with her then, Suga-ssi?"

"If anything the Big 3 should bow down before us for practically paving the way for them. We managed to scale to the top, and break into U.S charts. The Big 3 all want to be us, to emulate our success. Pardon me," Yoongi drawled,"but if anything, it would probably be _your_ artists that wish to cosy up to _us._ "

"You haven't answered my question--"

"I'm getting there." Yoongi exhaled. "Lisa-ssi is...one of the best performers I've ever seen, and seems to be an overall likeable person. I would like to get to know her better. Simple as that." 

He was feeling drained. The conversation was going nowhere. Blackpink was probably getting ready to leave as well. For himself, he had warned his manager and members in advance to leave without him.

"Suga-ssi," Lisa's manager said softly,"you do know the girls have a dating ban, correct?"

Yoongi raised his gaze. "Yes...I do..." He said quietly. _This was it. He had been caught. It was over._

_He had failed._

"Then...why still try to talk with her....?" 

Her manager was watching him carefully. In that moment, Yoongi understood everything--Lisa's manager was just like a father, interrogating a boy who showed interest in his precious daughter. Questioning if he was worthy of the girl, trying to understand the boy's motives.

"I just...would like to have a chance. Just one chance to speak with her, for now. If...if things turn serious...I will speak with YG sajangnim himself." Yoongi said slowly, balling his fist in determination. "I forge my own path, see. I can never sit back and wait because otherwise...it might be too late for...anything, really..."

He had spoken too much, even though he meant every word he said. But this manager guy might go report everything to his CEO and that would really be the end. 

"You really are something else, Suga-ssi..."

To his amazement, Lisa's manager was smiling. 

"Sajangnim would probably kill me _and then_ fire me from the job if he ever finds out," he continued," so...I request recompense, and in return...I shall allow you to speak (just speak) _..._ with Lisa."

This man knew how to do business without making it sound shady, but Yoongi wasn't complaining. 

Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, Yoongi tried to suppress his grin with a neutral expression."With pleasure... here, you can just type in your details in my phone and--"

"Oh oppa, manager-unnie wants to speak with you!" Lisa suddenly appeared, startling the two men. They retracted their hands as she stared, nonplussed.

"Uh...what is it Lisa?" Her manager said, scratching the back of his neck. Yoongi could have sworn he saw the man redden.

She shrugged. "I dunno, she just wants to speak with you. If you're finished talking with sunbae..."

Her manager glanced over at Yoongi and seemed to have come to a decision.

"Yeah, we're finished. Suga-ssi..." In a flurry of movement, he tore out a piece of paper from some notebook about his person and scribbled for a minute before passing it to him.

"Please...be careful..." whispered Lisa's manager earnestly before nodding at Lisa and entering the dressing room, shutting the girl out.

Yoongi clutched the piece of paper which after a quick glance he confirmed to be bank account details.

_Be careful._

_Translation: Don't make me regret my decision._

"Sunbae?"

The smile came easily when he took in her appearance. She had changed into a simple lilac oversized hoodie and black pants with her make up retouched and hair still down. 

A total girlfriend look.

_Wait what?_

Lisa-ssi" he greeted quickly, pushing the thought out of his head. "I didn't think we'd get to talk back there."

Lisa giggled and bowed. "Forgive my manager-oppa, he can be a little intimidating, that's why I came to rescue you."

"Rescue me?" Yoongi chuckled but at the same time he felt a pleasurable shiver run up his spine.

"Yeah, uh...forget about that..." she muttered," but anyway..." she perked up, eyes shining.

"It's good to see you again!" she said, her face breaking into a smile.

"You seem to have had a good performance," he complimented," I only caught half of it sorry..."

She chuckled. "Well, it's getting better yeah. And oh... _(her smile, jeez, her smile made his heart do somersaults)_ I never got to thank you for...last time...so,uh...thank you for your advice, sunbae." She bowed again, hands locked together.

"It's Yoongi. And no need to keep bowing heh" he said awkwardly, chewing on his lip.

She glanced up. "P-pardon?"

"I'd....I'd like you to call me Yoongi," he muttered, averting his gaze as he felt his face heating up.

_Jeez, was he gonna start blushing too now? He wished she wouldn't stare at him like that. Like...like he was some god on a pedestal._

"Well then, I'm Lalisa, but you can still call me Lisa" she returned in jest. He quickly glanced back at her, captivated by her smile.

"Lalisa..." he tested slowly, relishing how it rolled off his tongue. Not Lisa-ssi. _Lalisa_. 

It sounded melodic, like dancing musical notes. Some of his confidence was restored.

"Umm so uh Lalisa...uhh about that collab thing...I'm sorry, I-I kind of lied just to speak with you." He blurted. To his surprise, she giggled.

"I guessed as much. So, what can I help you with, sunbae?"

"Yoongi."

"Oh I'm sorry, I mean Yoongi!" she gasped and he almost had to suppress his laughter at her apparent dismay, weren't he so surprised by her previous answer.

"Wait a minute, how did you know...?"

She fiddled with the strings of her hoodie. "Ahh well...why would such an esteemed rapper like yourself want to collaborate with someone like me? I'm still starting out...practically still a rookie. Moreover...with the recent occurrences...I'd only drag your name to the mud and your fans wouldn't be too happy. Besides, there are far more talented, veteran artists in the industry who could lend their expertise for your projects, and produce better quality music." 

He was literally struck dumb.

How could she say that without even a trace of envy or malice in her voice?

Did she honestly believe she wasn't one of the best performers of the generation?

How could she be so humble, when her swag-oozing rapping voice was the only thing playing in his head all day ever since he first heard their music?

"Paboya..." he whispered softly, and he didn't know if it was directed at her or himself.

"Pardon, sunbae?"

"Yoongi"

"Argggghhhh I'm sorry I'm sorry!"

He laughed out loud for real now. She was adorable when she was freaking out, the way she flapped her arms. 

He tilted his head. "I never said I wouldn't consider a collab with you someday. You see, I like...everything about you. I really like you, Lisa." Yoongi held his breath and waited.

"Oh thank you, sun--I mean Yoongi, really I..." the words died in her throat and her eyes grew round as saucers. She covered her mouth in shock. "S-s-sunbae?"

He took out his phone. "May--may I have your number, Lisa?" he asked nervously,"I'd like to talk to you more... you know in case that opportunity for a collaboration ever turned up..."

He expected her to back away. Waited for her to politely decline. Prepared himself for her refusal, citing their dating ban and her sajangnim's strict rules. Braced himself for a meltdown. Anticipated a byuntae accusation. 

What came instead was a soft and timid: "It would be an honour."

He hadn't realised he had his eyes squeezed tight until he blinked them open and her face swam into focus. She had her phone out as well and he almost wanted to take a picture of her adorably flustered expression.

"I'd...I'd like to talk with you as well, s-s-sunbae _."_ she stammered, a light blush dusting her cheeks.

His heart was a monster roaring victoriously in his chest, clawing at his ribs to escape and announce to the world that he, Min Yoongi, had basically just confessed to Lalisa Manoban AND she had sort of accepted him. He wanted to break out into a victory dance right there.

_It was a start and he was so freaking ecstatic, thank God thank Allah thank the goddamn Buddha! Halleluljah to Jesus!_

_Keep it cool Min, you'll scare her off,_ commanded his inner voice.

In a daze, he typed his number on her phone and she did likewise on his own. 

She had added a small monkey emoji next to her name. _Cute._

"Well then...I'll be going. Talk to you later?" he asked. Her hand was on the knob of the door and she turned back, blasting him with a bashful smile.

"If...if you'd like to," she answered, but her eyes shone hopefully. 

He nodded and tapped his phone. "Wait for my text then." _Yes, that was a good way to start_ _conversing._

"I will," she answered and Yoongi could have sworn he saw stars dancing in her eyes.

Lisa waved shyly. "Take care...Yoongi."

_Take care._

_He liked the sound of that._

_"_ You too, Lisa" he replied, feeling his mouth stretch into his broadest grin yet. She quickly ducked her head and Yoongi swore he heard her faint squealing when the door clicked shut. 

_Take care._

_Translation: ......_

His brain buffered and failed to come up with a translation. All he could think of right now was how her face softened when she said his name. All he could think of right now was that 'take care' sounded so much better than 'be careful'.

_**Be careful** _ _was ominous and dark. It meant heartbreak or the end of their careers._

_**Take care** _ _was hopeful, optimistic and light. It meant tentative steps, a return to an age of innocence and the possibility of finding happiness together._

Yoongi didn't bother to remove the wide grin taking over half of his face. He shoved his hands in his pockets and sauntered away,like a cowboy riding off into the sunset at the end of a movie.

_The only difference was that Min Yoongi's story was only just beginning._


	4. Just Fine

"Promise me you'll take care out there," he mumbled, holding her in his fierce embrace.

She had the audacity to chuckle. "Oppa you're choking me."

He pulled back at arms' length, keeping a firm grip on her slight shoulders. "Lisa, I'm serious right now."

She noticed his distressed face and sobered.

"I will, don't worry. Besides, I won't be alone. We're gonna have tons of guards and I'll stay with the girls all the time. And the managers will be with us too."

Yoongi closed his eyes, tension coursing throughout his body, making him feel stiff and disjointed.

"You can't have that carefree attitude when you're there, or anywhere in the open for that matter," he began again slowly, so that maybe this time she'd understand.

Sometimes, her naivete was a bad thing: she had a sunshine personality, pure and innocent to the point that she didn't think badly of anyone. And he was concerned that her innate child-like trust would get her in trouble.

Scratch that, he was _mortally afraid_ that if he let her out of his sight, something bad would happen to her.

"It's what those crazy antis would be waiting for: waiting for you to lower your guard. And the minute you do, they pounce." He gazed at her, eyes blazing with desperation. "Lisa, are you even listening to me?"

She was smiling up at him in a dopey manner."Oppa, you're so cute when you're being protective."

He exhaled, giving up, and pulled her into a hug again.

"This is exactly why I'm worried about you," Yoongi mumbled, breathing in her scent of tangerines and a whiff of coconut. "You have the attention span of that blue fish from _Nemo_."

She laughed. "DooOooOooory."

He brushed a hand down her back as she nuzzled against the crook of his neck.

"Yoongi, this isn't the first time that the girls and I will be out of the country, you know. And I'm not a kid, I know there are people out there who hate us" she said at length, taking him by surprise, "I'll promise to be extra careful."

"What about sneaking out to buy food?" Yoongi said sternly, straightening and folding his arms. He knew this was her big weakness.

He had in mind to ask her members to buy tons of snacks, just to make sure she wouldn't have to go out at some godforsaken hour unaccompanied. 

She sighed, pulling her cap low over her brow. "I can't help that..."

"Try again."

"I promise," she said reluctantly. "I promise I won't sneak out to buy food without telling anyone to go with me. Happy now?"

He finally relaxed. If Lisa promised, he knew she wouldn't go back on her word.

"How about a reward then?" he asked lightly, seeing her mood plummet as their date was coming to an end.

He tugged her inside an arcade which immediately made her perk up as she gleefully rushed in, whooping like an excited kid before he had even finished paying at the entrance.

"Babe, wait for me!" Yoongi groaned. He had never shied away from running, but he was exhausted after roaming around their favourite haunts for the better part of the day. Lisa on the other hand still seemed to have energy to spare.

She laughed at him as she ran ahead whilst he gave chase.

And Yoongi decided that maybe hearing her happy, bubbly laughter at the expense of his lungs collapsing was worth it.

*

Soft music played in the background as Lisa sat on the floor of her bedroom. She was going through her clothes as she packed for Blackpink's imminent departure to Japan.

She hummed along softly, occasionally tuning in to her boyfriend who was lecturing her as he sprawled on the bed.

"....And make sure you call your members if you see anyone, _anyone_ at all that is acting suspicious, do you hear me?" he asked, biting his lip.

"Yes, Yoongi, yes," Lisa sighed in return.

Ever since YG had given their relationship the green light, Yoongi could visit Lisa more freely, although he still had to be extremely discreet--if the press caught wind of their relationship, he had no idea of what they'd make of it.

And not only would it tarnish Blackpink's image, their relationship might also irk their respective fandoms. He didn't really care, but for the sake of not causing an uproar, their CEO's had jointly agreed to keep the relationship private for now.

The world was just not ready for them yet. 

But he was fine with keeping it a secret--he didn't need any more spotlights on his private life.

Moreover, the fact that Blackpink's 'dating ban' was still technically in effect helped to keep potential admirers away so it was really not such a bad deal, as Yoongi saw it.

"And buy some pepper spray, keep it on you at all times, okay? I should have bought it myself, pabo I forgot! Also, I want to see how you're doing with that defence move I showed you, in case some bastard dares lay a hand on--"

"Oppa, I think you're even more anxious than I am about this tour," Lisa grunted as she sat back on her luggage, attempting to close it.

He sighed, then stood up and helped her zip up the bulging suitcase. "It's just...I'm...I'm just....I'm sorry..." he mumbled, changing tack.

_Maybe he was being a bit_ _too protective_ , _nagging like some grandmother_.

She surprised him with a hug. "Don't be: I know you mean well, and I appreciate you worrying so much about me. But I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself!"

"Oh yeah?"

Scooping her up, he had Lisa squealing in his arms as he threw her on the bed. He landed on top of her, tickling her mercilessly.

"Stop, ah, ah hahahaa, Yoongi please stop it I can't ah!"

He was laughing too, his fingers scrabbling relentlessly. "Nope."

"You monster!" she pouted in between hiccups.

Yoongi couldn't resist, he dipped down and gently brushed his lips over her warm soft mouth, sensing her completely still beneath him.

Lying down by her side as they regained their breath, he turned to face her, watching her mirror his grin.

"I'll miss you," they blurted and then they both laughed.

"Lisa?" he said when they had calmed down a bit more. 

"Mhmm?"

"You do know about the death threats my group received over the years, right?"

She shifted slightly. "Yeah."

"I think Jimin's the one who got the most," Yoongi mused,"and Kookie was even the target of some satanic cult ritual....but they ended up writing his name wrong, idiots."

He would have even smiled if the subject at hand wasn't so serious. Lisa's eyes were on him, waiting for him to continue.

"I just...I wish I could come with you somehow," he sighed, worry lining his face. "I...I...get scared sometimes. If something happened to you, I'd..." he turned away, unable to finish the sentence.

In silent consternation, Lisa noticed the pale boy looked weary, as if he had been holding up an invisible weight and was now tiring. She tapped his chest to make him face her.

Leaning in, she connected their foreheads, feeling his breath flutter against her face as her eyes closed. Nothing existed but the soft voice of Ariana in the background, his warm forehead and their breathing, perfectly in sync. Not too fast, not too slow. 

Small moments like these were important for the couple.

They lay quietly, their unspoken emotions being translated in the intimate silence they shared. There was no need for much words or displays of affection. A simple gesture such as touching foreheads held far more meaning. 

And right now, Lisa wanted to reassure him, wanted to remind him: _We're here. We're together. We're okay._

She wasn't as oblivious as Yoongi made her to be--she was well aware of rumoured haters that had lately grown much more bold, openly proclaiming their malicious intentions on IG and Twitter--she had seen them for herself.

There were even the chilling death threats surfacing here and there, levelled at her group, and at herself.

It was also unnerving how the culprits just vanished off the internet, deleting their accounts once they were reported.

But Lisa knew they still lurked there, watching her every move.

And without even telling him, she knew Yoongi noticed her uneasiness, which was probably why he was fussing and keeping close to her in the last few days before they departed.

She marvelled at how he patiently waited for her to finish practising just to spend time with her, when he himself was no idle man with much time to spare.

"This isn't the first time we're going to Japan you know," she told him now, shifting to give him space. "Security has always been tight, I mean they don't even let Blinks take photos or videos."

He didn't answer right away as he rolled on his back, humming quietly.

Lisa watched him, her face softening when she noticed the small quirk of his lips as he nodded his head to the music.

"But you're global superstars now," he spoke up, startling her, "and that means more haters will be coming for you. Speaking from experience, by the way."

Lisa giggled. "You're making it sound like they're lining up to shoot me or something. Most of them do it just to get attention anyway. Lighten up, old man."

"Yah, I'm only trying to be a dutiful boyfriend here!" he protested indignantly, "do you want another round from the Tickle Monster?"

"No no I'm sorry, I'm sorry oppa, forgive me?" she pouted, blasting him with her _aegyo._

"Yeah whatever."

He tried to play it off, tried to pretend it didn't fluster him, but his pink ears gave him away.

Lisa punched the air in victory. She started when he sat up with a jolt.

"I hear footsteps."

Seconds later, the door swung open and Jennie Kim strode in without even batting an eyelash at the sight of the couple on the bed.

"Lis, Leo's crying, I think he's hungry, and unnie says we have to--"

"MAMMA'S COMING BABY!" Lisa hollered, dashing out of the room.

Jennie sighed as she bent to pick the remaining clothes littering the floor and place them back in their drawers. "Well, at least she's packed a suitcase. And hello, Yoongi."

Yoongi grinned.

Jennie had been the last of Lisa's members to warm up to him when it transpired that he and Lisa were a thing. He was still in awe of the commanding aura that she exuded: poised and in control.

It would be a lie to say he wasn't intimidated at first and he even tried extra hard to be cool and nonchalant around her to assert his dominance ( _War of Hormones_ , Jisoo had wittily dubbed those first few months of awkward interactions between the two rappers).

When he learned (courtesy of Jisoo) that Jennie had been doing exactly the same to hold her own against him in her territory, they laughed over it and became more comfortable with each other.

"Guess I'll be heading back then," he stretched. "I'll see myself out."

"Did you remember to tell her everything?" Jennie chuckled. "The pepper spray and the judo move?"

He clicked his tongue. "Fudge, she hasn't shown me the kick yet. Wait how did you--?"

She laughed and showed him a scrap of paper she had just picked up. "You had to make a list? You're just like a fussy aunt, are you sure you're not just babysitting our Lisa? I don't remember hiring a sitter."

He huffed, snatching the list back, and an amused Jennie caught snatches of _being a dutiful boyfriend_ and _just looking out for her_ before he stalked out, his usually pale face rosy.

*

It all happened too quickly.

One moment he was hurrying back to their dorm from the hairdresser's, cursing the traffic that was going to make him late for Lisa's video call. She had promised to call after their performance in Kobe before they left for Tokyo, even if it was for just a few minutes, because they were on tight schedule.

The next, he learned that there had been a shooting incident at their concert. 

Immediately, a strange burst of heat scaled up to his head and the face of his members warped and contorted out of shape. 

Taehyung was standing the closest and noticed his rising panic. He nudged the elder boy.

"Hyung, calm down, we don't know anything...we don't know what happened exactly..."

But Yoongi didn't react. Instead, his pupils steadily dilated.

"No. No. No... no no no no no no--"

"Hyung, wait--"

"Let go of me!"

"Kookie, hold him!" Hands reached out to grab the frantic short rapper as he struggled and fought against them.

"Hyung, calm down!"

"Jin, talk to him, do something!"

"Let go!" Yoongi was blinded by terror, his eyes bulging, horrible images flashing in his head, "I need to call Lisa! I need to make sure she's okay!"

"Look look, I'm calling Jisoo, okay?" Jin hastily held up his phone. "It's going to be okay."

"You don't know that! Oh god, I knew it, I knew it--"

"Yoongi, look. Look at me. "Namjoon stated calmly. "We don't know what happened exactly, there were just people talking and posting clips on the internet. Now breathe."

Yoongi heaved a ragged breath as Jungkook released him. He dropped to his hands and knees, retching. He clenched his jaw and raised his face.

Jin was frowning at his phone. "That's strange, why isn't she picking up?" His voice was strained.

"Maybe they're still backstage or something,you know how the signal's weak there," Taehyung put in loudly, making Yoongi wince, "they're all fine, they're all gonna be just fine, I mean there must have been tons of security, they probably whisked them off the stage real quick and right now they're just waiting for the chaos to die down. I mean there probably was a stampede or something--"

"Shut up." Yoongi stood unsteadily. "Keep phoning her, I'll just phone Lisa--"

"NO!" Everyone chorused, even Namjoon. And then they stared at each other in dismay.

Yoongi's eyes narrowed. 

"Something's happened to her, hasn't it?" he whispered. "Something bad..."

When they avoided looking at him, his hands balled into fists.

"Tell. Me." he gritted, rocks lodging in his throat. He could barely breathe.

Nobody spoke for a full minute until Namjoon heaved a sigh.

"It was during her solo stage," he said quietly.

"There was a gunshot and she collapsed. But the clips didn't show clearly where she was hit and there has been no official statement from YG. The culprit then shot himself in the head too, when he was chased outside the stadium."

"It...it was chaos hyung," Jimin piped up timidly, "we couldn't see what else happened from the videos. I'm sorry."

_Gunshot._

_Collapsed._

A muffled roar filled his ears, drowning out the pounding of his heart. He bit down hard on his tongue to stop himself from spiralling down a panic vortex. A coppery tang slid over his tongue and he realised it was blood.

"I'm going to call her," he said faintly.

"Yoongi--"

Yoongi made it to his room and shut the door, sliding down to the ground as he held his head.

Mustering his last ounce of strength, he dialled Lisa's phone number, praying to anyone, anything, that she was still alive and laughing and smiling. 

_His star couldn't die yet, right?_

To his shock, she immediately picked up.

"Li...Lis?" he asked in disbelief.

"Yoongi!"

His heart sank. "Rosé?"

"Lisa..." She was crying so hard, barely able to speak. "Lisa...she...she..." she couldn't finish before breaking down in a fit of sobbing.

"Yoongi?" A calmer voice buzzed through the phone.

"Jennie, I heard what happened" he pleaded,"please, I need to know, Lisa...is she...?"

"Dead?" He almost stopped breathing. "No..not so far..."

"W-what do you mean?"

"She was hit in the chest," Jennie whispered, "and right now she's very critical. I think they're gonna operate on her too but we don't know, we don't know anything, oh god Yoongi!" 

And this time it was her turn to surrender to her emotions. He could still hear Rose crying in the background, and a low voice murmuring, probably Jisoo.

"It happened so fast, w-we thought she had just tripped but we had heard t-the gunshot as well..." Jennie was fighting to keep her voice steady. "Yoongi, I don't know what to do, what if she...she..."

Yoongi swallowed. "She won't," he rasped. "And I'm flying over."

"How can you know--wait what?"

"I'm coming over," Yoongi gritted his teeth in determination, "and nobody's stopping me."

*

He thought he wouldn't be able to sleep but shock and exhaustion caught up to him en route to Kobe Airport. He slept fitfully, fuzzy images and screams crowding his dreams. He had watched the clips of the shooting on the internet of course, his heart dropping at the dreaded point when _it_ happened.

The footage he had seen was too blurry to even make out her expression, and it was too distant to properly discern where she had been hit exactly, even though he cycled through hundreds of clips shot from different angles that were spreading all over global news sites at a blistering rate.

His frustration and fear grew when YG released a short, vague statement that did nothing to ease his mind regarding Lisa's condition. They didn't even say she was shot, for crying out loud!

Were they seriously going to keep it hushed up when everyone had seen that damned video, had heard the gun fire, had seen his beautiful girl fall backwards, limp as a rag doll?

He wondered then, wondered what she had been feeling prior to being rudely interrupted by Death's metallic messenger.

Had she been having fun? 

Had she been laughing and smiling at her Blinks, her beloved fans she loved so much? 

Had she been about to slay them all with her killer dance moves? (His body warmed at the memory of her grinding on Osaka's stage.)

They say the faces of your loved ones flash in front of your eyes just before you die...had she thought of him as she was falling?

_No! Don't go there she was going to live, they were going to be reunited and live happily ever after like in her Disney movies, everything would be fine._

_Just fine._

This was the mantra Yoongi chanted in his head all through the cab drive to her private hospital, where he was going to meet Jennie, Jisoo and Rosé.

And he sure as hell hoped the press were more occupied with some other idol at the moment. 

His uncharacteristically positive thinking was dashed as soon as the taxi approached the hospital building.

Yoongi's line of sight was assaulted with a _sea_ of reporters, camera people loaded with their equipment and even more people camped outside, holding up banners and condolence messages for Lisa. Although he was moved by the latter group's gestures, it meant there was no way he could enter without being mobbed.

So much for being incognito.

Exasperation mounted, quickly followed by irritation bubbling in his gut.

"What the actual heck Jennie, where the hell are the security guards?" he hissed into his phone, peeking out from the car's window. "I'm toast if they catch me out here--"

"Chill lover boy," she drawled, but her voice was tense, "our staff is working on it but this situation is out of our control at the moment. Tell your driver to follow the directions I'm gonna tell you. It will take you the long way round, near the hospital's mortuary."

"Did you just call me--"

"Oh please, this is not the time for your bickering!" Jisoo came on line. "Yoongi, just bear with Jennie a bit longer, she's been on edge."

_What about me then?_ he was about to snarl but Rosé came on at that moment.

"Yoongi, hang in there ok? Lisa will be waiting for you."

Grateful, he nodded, even though she wouldn't see him. 

_Y_ _es, that's what he needed to remember._

_Lisa._

_Her face. Her smile. Her laugh._

Yoongi exhaled. "Tell me where I have to go..."

*

"Well that's simply preposterous, we wouldn't even last two seconds before we're caught--"

"Shut up Kim!"

"Oh _you_ want _me_ to shut up? Screw off Min," she snarled back, her eyes flinty. Yoongi stared her down.

They were in some waiting room, tempers fraying as the hours stretched into eternity. Lisa had been transferred to an intensive care unit after her operations, but it was maddening that her friends and Yoongi were still not allowed access. He had been in fact proposing to force their way in.

"Stop it. We're no closer to seeing Lisa than before." Jisoo sighed. "Look, we can just wait until the doctor allows, _like normal people do,_ instead of plotting to break in--"

"I would, but I don't have time!" Yoongi held his head. "The boys and I were supposed to leave for a concert rehearsal--" he glanced at his watch, "four hours ago. Nobody knows I'm here, not even Sejin-hyung! The boys said they'll stall for me as much as they can but they can't do it forever."

He stood up, pacing back and forth. "And...and I don't want to keep them waiting...I don't want to hold the whole group back because of me. They're always so supportive...and they're always excited to perform for ARMY's...Bang sajangnim won't be happy..."

"So go ahead then!" Jennie said suddenly. She glared at him, unflinching. "Go ahead! Hop on the next plane to Seoul and get the hell out of here, Min Yoongi! Who cares if Lisa dies anyway, right? You can probably find a ton of other girls for your next girlfriend--"

Yoongi slammed her into the wall and she gasped, but not from impact: he had his arm behind her, protecting her back.

His face contorted as he spat out his answer.

"Don't you ever," he hissed, " _ever_ speak about Lisa like that in front of me."

"Well then," she replied silkily, ignoring Jisoo's pleas,"who are you going to choose right now: Lisa or BTS? Your call, _oppa._ "

That word, that one word broke him, because only Lisa called him oppa, with that adorable bubbly laugh attached to it.

Only Lisa called him oppa with all the warmth and happiness in the world.

Only Lisa meant it when she called him oppa.

_Only Lisa..._

He raised his clenched fist and Jennie shut her eyes tight. He heard Jisoo yell.

And Yoongi's knuckles collided with his jaw. He fell to the ground with the force of his punch.

"What the actual fudge--"

"Yoongi!"

Waving their hands off, he sat up, spitting blood. He winced and tapped his cheek.

"This is nothing," Yoongi grimaced, before breaking down in sobs.

*

It must have been hours later when he woke up after his outburst.

It was humiliating to say the least, because Min Yoongi wasn't usually a man who liked to bare his feelings for the whole world to see. 

But certain situations had the control of his emotions wrenched out of his grasp, and he was helplessly sucked into a black hole of torment and anguish that had him crying his heart out until he was drained. 

He woke up in the same waiting room as before, but this time someone had lifted him on the couch and covered him with a blanket.

"Yoongi?"said a timid, breathy voice. He sat up, his jaw stinging and he remembered the powerful punch that almost knocked him out. But he didn't regret what he'd done--he had been so dangerously close to losing his head at that moment.

Gingerly, he stroked his cheek. He could already feel the side of his jaw swelling up. His manager was not going to be happy. 

"Rosé?" he croaked. She was sitting by his feet, clutching a plastic water bottle and a bread roll package.

"Here," she said gently,"I thought you'd be hungry...and you do need to keep your strength up as well, so eat up." She pushed them into his hands but avoided his gaze.

Yoongi's stomach growled. The clock on the wall marked the fourth hour since he had arrived, the twelfth since he had something to eat or drink and the twentieth hour since _it_ happened.

At this realisation he stiffened. "Rosé, is she awake...?"

"Not yet," she said sadly and turned away.

Yoongi noted the way she was sitting, hunched up, fiddling with her nails.

"Thanks" he muttered. Slowly, he started eating the roll, washing it down with water.

In the time he had been dating Lisa, he got to know more about Blackpink's members and he observed their interactions. 

While Jisoo was like the big sister of the group, she never bossed her dongsaengs around--merely cared for them, like his Jin hyung, and was also the mood-maker of the group. Lisa loved her and looked up to her like the big sister she never had.

Jennie, after the initial avoidance, was shy and introverted, hanging her head and blushing in his presence. When she relaxed even further, he even got a glimpse of her spitfire capabilities whenever they touched upon topics that had her worked up.

She was Lisa's crush and at times Yoongi had even caught himself being jealous of her, which had the rest of the girls falling about in amusement when they found out.

Rosé was the closest to Lisa, the one who stayed with her when she was feeling down, the one who shared her laughs, the one Lisa bickered with on a daily basis, the one who knew first about their relationship.

She was in a way Lisa's twin sister, and although they could be complete opposites--with Lisa bouncing around the room while Rosé was quietly drawing, playing her guitar or staring at her pet fish--they still could glance at each other and understand what the other needed to say in a heartbeat.

He couldn't imagine what she was feeling right now.

"Like you, I suppose," the pink-haired girl answered, raising her head. Her eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot."Like anyone else who cares about her."

He realised he had spoken out loud. Yoongi reached out and took her hand. She was shivering.

"Where are your unnies?" he asked quietly.

She gestured at a distant blue door. "Talking with the managers. They've contacted your staff too. Jennie asked them to give you more time, but I don't think they were happy about it. I don't know what they've decided. And Lisa's parents are going to fly over soon."

Grudgingly making a mental note to thank Jennie later, he turned his attention back to the pink-haired girl. 

"Rosé..how is she, really...?"

The girl shrank into the stiff couch, almost as if she wanted to disappear.

"She's... still fighting," she began, her bottom lip trembling,"they were operating on her for so long I thought she wasn't coming out alive. I mean, she was still in there even when you came! And now...now... the doctor says we still can't go see her...not until she shows any improvement after 24 hours....and if she doesn't....it could...it could mean she...she..."

She was on the verge of tearing up, Yoongi could see the tears pooling in her eyes. But the thirst for any scrap of information rendered him merciless and he probed further. "She...?"

Rosé gulped. "It could mean she won't come back." she whispered," there had been several complications during her procedure. I heard the nurses: they mentioned myocardial infarction-"

"Heart attack," he breathed.

"...and they weren't too happy with the outcome. They said...they said there was this huge possibility it would affect her cognition permanently, like 80% chance... And by permanently, they meant she might never wake up."

Her voice cracked at the last sentence and she covered her mouth, squeezing her eyes shut. "I'm so scared, I don't want her to die! I love my bratty Limario, I never want to wake up without her next to me. Lisa has been there every step of the way! She promised we'll be together through it all! How...how can she not come back? Why did it have to be her? It's...it's too cruel!"she wept.

He didn't reach out to comfort the crying girl--ironically enough for a composer, he had no words in his mouth, his mind blank.

"I have to see her," he said after an age, his voice quiet and steely. "We have to see her, all four of us."

She looked at him tearfully. "B-but how?"

Rather than describing what happened next, it would be far more compelling to describe how the heroic Min Yoongi was suddenly fired up with courage, that rare burst of confidence that briefly appears when all is lost but the dying embers of hope suddenly spark up again.

It would be far more captivating to narrate how he puffed out his chest and with a glint of determination in his eyes, declared that _where there's a will, there's a way_ before proceeding to fight the hospital's security and force his way into Lisa's room.

Both accounts would however, also be completely untrue.

In reality, the small pale boy sat back on the couch and closed his eyes, unable to look at the hopeful girl next to him.

"I don't know," he said in defeat.

Min Yoongi was no hero. Min Yoongi was no knight in shining armour.

And he knew that. His demons knew as well.

_Min Yoongi is a cowardly goody-two shoes who blindly obeys what his superiors say,_ they howled.

_Min Yoongi is tired and worried_ ** _._**

_Min Yoongi is pathetic and useless._

_Min Yoongi is helpless and a crybaby._

_Min Yoongi is always cowering and hiding away behind his music sheets_.

_Min Yoongi is a hopeless wreck_.

_Min Yoongi is trash._

_Min Yoongi doesn't deserve_ **_her._ **

_Min Yoongi._.. _Min Yoongi_... chanted the shadows.

He clutched at his hair, begging the jeering voices to _please leave_ , as he crumpled upon himself and curled into a ball, hiding his tears.

They screeched in glee, seeing him give in so easily, and rushed in for the kill, swooping in upon him as he was falling into a dark abyss, falling falling falling. The shadows were everywhere, taking over his senses and he was suffocating, he was dying. When he screamed nobody heard him because he was falling alone alone alone--

"YOONGI!"

He jolted, cold sweat breaking on his forehead. "W-what?"

Harsh white light from the overhead fluorescent light tubes glared in his face, indicating the passage of time--through the lone window of the waiting room, he could make out the dark night outside.

Jennie, Jisoo, Rosé and two of their staff were gazing down at him, concern etched on each face.

"You--I think you were having a nightmare--"

"I'm fine" he muttered gruffly, but didn't trust himself to get up from his spot on the floor. It was such a blatant lie--he was the furthest thing away from fine right now. 

"And can you please stop staring? I'm not some zoo animal."he hissed, feeling the added anxiety swirl in his gut.

Jennie cleared her throat. "Anyways, we have some bad news and some good news."

"Tell me the bad news first," Yoongi said, bracing himself.

"You're booked for a flight out of Kobe that leaves in an hour. No buts, no excuses. Your sajangnim was really scary."

Yoongi stared at her blankly, wondering how she could be smiling at him when delivering such a blow, her lips peeling back in a gummy smile.

_Unless..._

"And the good news?" he whispered, daring to hope.

"Lisa woke up ten minutes ago."

*

The rest of the time until he was finally, _finally_ allowed in was a blur, but once he found himself in the same room as her, everything faded into the background and all that existed was him and her. 

He stood. He stared.

She was propped up in bed, long tawny strands of hair splayed out on the pillow like a halo. A faint sheen of sweat covered her brow, her bangs messy. Although she was dressed in a hospital nightgown, she sat in stark contrast to her dreary surroundings: her eyes were ablaze, gleaming and wet.

"Yoongi..."

At her call, he came alive.

Yoongi rushed to her side, urgently pressing his forehead against hers, clutching her cold hands.

He closed his eyes and time slowed down.

Nothing existed, except the incessant beeping in the background, her warm forehead against his own and their shallow breathing. Too fast but harmonious, nonetheless.

_We're here,_ he said. _We're together. We're okay._

She whimpered, snaking her hands around his neck to cage them in a world of their own making, their noses brushing gently as he nuzzled her.

"I thought you'd left me," Yoongi whispered, leaning back to look her in the eye, in case this was all a hallucination and she'd vanish without warning.

"I'm sorry--"

"No" he cut her off roughly, "no, you don't get to say that..."

He cupped her face. "I thought I'd never hear you laugh, or see you smile, or hear you call me again. I thought...I thought..."he didn't trust himself to continue and buried his face in the crook of her neck as she stroked his convulsing shoulders.

"I'm sorry," he sobbed, "I couldn't protect you, I couldn't..."

"You couldn't," she agreed, wiping his tears,"how could you do that, even if you had been there? You couldn't prevent the bullet from hitting me..." she guided his hand above her chest and he felt her heart, pounding strongly against his knuckles.

Lisa looked up at him, her gaze fierce. "So if I'm not allowed to say sorry for what happened, than neither are you."

At long last, his mouth quirked up into a tired smile. "Even now, you're gonna play smart, huh?"

And she giggled, throwing her head back in the process. His smile grew: her sunny laugh was back.

His momentary relief was quickly replaced by a frown when he saw her wince and squirm uncomfortably. He released her from his embrace and she whined at the loss of contact.

"Baby are you okay? Are you hurt? Should I call the doctor?" he asked worried. She shook her head, reaching out to him like a little kid.

"No, no I'm fine...just my wound is sore and my chest is all tight...huh...," she huffed.

"Maybe it's time for your pain meds, I'll just call the nurse--"

"Don't go please. I'm fine. I hate those painkillers, I was all groggy and nauseous before they wore off..."

"Ok ok I'm staying." He returned beside her, clutching her hand. He thought he heard faint noises coming from the door but didn't pay attention, focusing on the doe-like brown eyes gazing up at him.

Lisa raised the other hand to stroke his swollen cheek, frowning.

"You're hurt..."

"I uhm...punched myself in the face," he admitted, "I was losing my head back there."

Her mouth quirked at the corner and then she suddenly reached up and pecked his cheek. "There, all better." she laughed as he stood frozen by her boldness.

"And you also dyed your hair," she noted.

He nodded, grinning. "I was going to surprise you."

It came again: faint jiggles of the door knob but he didn't pay mind to it.

Her hands dove into his newly dyed violet hair, and he closed his eyes, savouring her fingers digging through his scalp. "It's for the comeback. I asked them for this purple colour because it reminded me...," he smiled shyly,"...it reminded me of you. I thought it would be like a reminder of you while you were away on tour. Cos' you know... 'purple hearts for Lisa', isn't that what you tell your fans?"

Lisa chuckled. "Oh oppa I'm touched! I thought you were going to say it reminded your of your dongsaeng, because he says 'I purple you', you know."

**"Jennie watch out that's the--!"**

The door burst open and Jennie and Rosé toppled into the room, their faces flushing scarlet as they looked up at the startled couple. Jisoo came in after the girls, wearing her trademark grin and nodded at the pair.

"Nyeongan maknae, welcome back to the land of the living."

"Unnies!" Lisa called happily.

"It's our turn to see Lisa, lover boy. Also your flight's in twenty five minutes, so I suggest you wrap up your conversation," Jennie drawled. "Kiss her goodbye and let's go."

"Unnie, don't be pushy, you ruined the atmosphere!" Rosé scolded.

"You're leaving?" Lisa said stricken, turning to Yoongi. Her grip on him tightened.

He sighed. "Yeah..." he admitted reluctantly, hating how she immediately looked crestfallen.

"But I'll call you later," he added hastily, trying to be cheerful, "and I'll text you and send you pics from our rehearsal, yeah? And we can Face Time too. I'll blow up your phone with texts, you'll see."

"And we're not staying here forever," Jisoo put in kindly,"the doctors are really surprised with your progress. They said they might even discharge you after a week."

"That's my Lali," Yoongi said fondly,"you show those bastards what you got!" 

"Your flight, Yoongi." Jennie reminded.

"You really can't wait to see the back of me, huh?"

Jennie gave him a sheepish grin. "Sorry, I just want to properly hug Lisa, but I don't want to interrupt your time with her either."

"You kinda did, eavesdropping and then bursting in on us like that,"he sighed.

"I told you they'd hear us!" Rosé hissed but Jennie just shrugged.

"I just wanted to see if they kissed yet."

"And they call me perverted," Jisoo said wonderingly," I didn't know you had the makings of a peeping-tom in you, Jendeuk-ah."

Yoongi smiled as the girls cracked up, Jennie included. He looked at his girlfriend, who was laughing heartily, and he knew she would be in good hands.

"Well...I guess this is a goodbye then, for now," he swallowed. He was reluctant to leave her side but although Bang-PD was a pretty laid back boss, when he put his foot down, you didn't argue.

"Yeah...I guess," she said quietly, intertwining their fingers.

Without further ado, he tilted her head and leaned in, ghosting his lips over her mouth before kissing her fully, slanting his mouth over hers. He took it slow and gentle, drinking in Lisa's firm response as her lips molded against his. He was faintly aware of Jennie gagging in the background and the others reproaching her.

But he didn't care, not when Lisa's scent beneath the impersonal smell of the hospital gown was giving him a heady rush. He even dared to brush a kiss along her jaw, eliciting a quiet sigh.

"Let's pick this up when we meet again," he whispered, knowing full well he wasn't going to stop if he didn't put on the brakes. She pulled back as well, her eyes already hazy.

"I love you. Take care," she told him. He gave her a soft peck on the forehead.

"I love you too."

"Oh gag," Jennie pulled a face,"what's this drama called again? I'm gonna get tooth decay from all this sugary lovey-dovey activity."

Yoongi smirked. "Now I wonder what _Tae-tae oppa_ would say to that?"

He laughed as everyone turned to a red-faced Jennie who was still sitting on the floor.

"Unnie?" Rosé gulped.

"Are you telling me..." Lisa gaped.

"....that you and Taehyung are...?" Jisoo goggled.

"Thanks a bunch, Min Yoongi," Jennie grumbled. Her members could only look on incredulously, a mischievous smirk slowly taking over their faces.

He laughed and bowed with flourish on his way out.

"Pleasure's all mine, Jennie Kim. And oh, thank you for talking to my managers for me."

He glanced back one last time at Lisa and she waved. He thought it would be hard to leave but seeing her old sunny smile was enough to let him know that things were going to be alright. 

The sun had come out, the dark clouds had lifted.

It was a new day, and he had many more to look forward to. He could feel it. And he could see it in her eyes: lively and starry as before.

They were going to be just fine.

"Run!" she giggled. "You're not gonna catch the plane."

He grinned, his heart swelling, his body filling with warmth. "Wanna bet? Just watch me."

"I'll come see you at your concert if you do catch it!" she winked and crossed her heart. "That's a Manoban promise."

Yoongi smiled. One eyelid flickered. 

"Challenge accepted."

And he ran.


	5. Not Yet

_When he was six, he thought heaven was in the sky._

He would tilt his head back as far as it could go and squint up, trying in vain to catch people wheeling about amongst the clouds on clear days. He envied them. It must be fun to play all day amongst the fluffy clouds, soft and white as cotton, clean as fresh laundry.

_When he was twelve, he thought heaven was an undefinable, mysterious place beyond the stars._

It was a place where you stay there for infinity times infinity equals eternity and he couldn't wrap his head around this fact. It seemed more like a punishment rather than a reward. What were you supposed to do during all that time, if there was nothing else to do but just...exist? He thought heaven sounded incredibly boring.

_When he was sixteen, he decided heaven was not real after all._

I mean, was there even a God in the first place? If so, why all the injustices? What did he do to deserve such a terrible malaise in the form of that dreaded shadow that now haunted his dark days, feeding off his doubts and insecurities? As far as he was concerned, there was only one truth: Life was nasty, brutish and short. Here today, gone tomorrow. What was the saying again? _Dust and unto dust you shall return._

Namjoon often tried to overturn his hyung's cynical outlook on life, stating that although Life was indeed as Orwell described in his seminal novel, it was also the reason one could on the other hand appreciate the simplicity and beauty in everyday blessings. (" _Like crabs_ ", " _Are you being serious right now?"_ )

"Think of it this way," Namjoon explained,"if you experienced no hardship, no worries, no stress whatsoever since the day you were born, how can you tell that you are truly happy? Are you truly justified to say that you appreciate your fortunes if you have not been through adverse circumstances where you had to fight tooth and nail to retain what was yours?"

Yoongi did try to understand his dongsaeng, but sometimes Namjoon got too caught up in his philosophical ruminations and forgot that his audience had vastly simpler problems than existential dilemmas.

It did not help that Min Yoongi was also a man who held steadfastly to his views. Embracing changes to his code of beliefs did not come so easily and subsequently, Namjoon's words often went over his head.

*

World War 3 started whilst the general was peacefully eating his lunch in his PJ's and browsing on his PC, safely hidden inside his room from the hurricane systematically destroying the rest of the dorm (the maknaes had started some game which consisted of a lot of shouting and he didn't want to get involved).

He was comfortably tucked up between the sheets, slurping on his noodles when an incoming call on his phone interrupted his browsing session. Pausing the video, he leaned over and checked the caller ID, then almost overturned the bowl of food on himself in excitement.

Yoongi hastily wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, patted his hair and straightened the collar of his shirt. Finally, he took the phone call.

"Lisa, hey!" he said cheerfully. "Missed your oppa so much?"

There was silence on the other end, although Yoongi could hear the sound of someone breathing. His brows furrowed.

"Who is this?" he said, his voice turning stern. He knew right away this was someone different--Lisa would usually giggle or start talking right away. "Where's Lisa? What do you want?"

"I should probably be directing the last question back at you, Suga-ssi. Or should I say," rasped a reedy, male voice, "Min Yoongi."

Yoongi scrunched up his nose. The voice sounded familiar but he couldn't quite place it. He was more preoccupied with Lisa.

"Who are you? Where's Lisa?" A sudden thought made his blood run cold. "Are...have you...have you kidnapped her?" he gasped, sitting up straight. The bowl tipped in his arms but he barely noticed the hot liquid splashing over his arm.

"Goodness, no!" A thin laugh. "My dear boy, you certainly jump to conclusions very quickly regarding your...ahh, _girlfriend._ "

His blood turned to ice. _Who was this man?_

"If you haven't kidnapped her then who are you? Why do you have her phone? What do you want from me?" His knee was starting to bounce with tension.

"You haven't recognised me?" The man sounded disappointed.

"Should I know you?" Yoongi responded boldly. It was rude, he knew, but he was impatient--what if Lisa was in trouble and needed him right now--

"Well, I should hope so, considering you're dating an idol signed with my agency."

_'...signed with my agency...'_

_HOLY CRAP_

"Yang sajangnim?" Yoongi gasped. "What the--"

"Annyeongasheyo, Suga-ssi, I wish I had been greeting you under more pleasant circumstances," Yang drawled, "but as things stand, we have a grave problem on our hands right now."

Yoongi mustered the strength to say something, anything. "Lisa?" he finally asked weakly, "is she there? Is she okay?"

"You really do seem concerned about her. To set your mind at rest, she is fine, and unaware that I am talking to you at the moment. Her manager came to me this morning, bringing her phone with him and he confessed to helping you two get together. He seemed guilty for hiding from me. He also confessed to asking for your money in return for setting you up with Lisa. Needless to say, he will be dismissed for betraying the company's loyalty and allowing for this situation to arise."

"No!"

Yoongi remembered Lisa's eyes shining whenever she talked affectionately about her manager oppa, remembered how the man routinely helped them meet up, and how he refused to take anymore money for his troubles.

"You can't do that man! I, I mean," he corrected himself, "With all due respect sir, you should not allow this particular situation to reflect on your employee's past work--"

"I will be the judge of that." Yang returned sharply. "All three of you were aware of the dating ban, yet you proceeded to flaunt the rules I set. The rules are there for a reason, Suga-ssi. I don't want to risk a major coup d'etat within my company because someone decided to rebel. I wish to deal with this situation swiftly, as soon as possible. When are you free for a meeting?"

Yoongi's mind was working very fast and he could barely keep up with the thoughts in his head. "Meeting? With you?"

"Yes, with me," Yang sighed.

Yoongi could practically see him roll his eyes and his dislike for the older man grew. "I need to investigate and discuss with you further regarding the nature of your relationship with Lisa."

_The time had come. This was it--the next step in their relationship._

"I will be free in two days," Yoongi said. This was the rational part of him speaking (it had mercifully taken over),"shall I come to your headquarters or...?"

"Not the most ideal of days," YG grumbled,"but I suppose it will do. Yes, please come to YGE, incognito naturally. Be there at nine sharp. If you wish to have your CEO accompany you, or any member or your staff, please feel free to bring them along."

"Thank you for the offer, sajangnim" Yoongi said politely, teeth gritted,"but I am the one responsible for this state of affairs and I shall carry that burden myself. I'm sure we can reach an amicable agreement together."

"You sound optimistic, Suga-ssi," Yang commented.

Yoongi suppressed a wry laugh. _That was new._

"I'll take that as a compliment, sajangnim."

"One last thing," Yang said,"you are not to contact Lisa in any form, nor any of Blackpink's members or their staff. If you fail to follow this order, there will be harsh consequences."

It was on the tip of Yoongi's tongue to inform Yang that _he_ had no authority to order an idol out of his agency's domain. But then he remembered Lisa was effectively trapped within that dungeon, and if Yoongi stepped out of line, _she_ was going to be the casualty in this battle.

And Yoongi would never forgive himself if that happened.

_Just this once, step down, Min Yoongi._

_For_ **_her_ ** _sake._

"Very well," Yoongi conceded, his mouth very dry, "I won't contact anyone."

"Good. I'll see you soon, Suga-ssi."

And the line went dead.

Yoongi's phone dropped from his hands and he leaned back against the headboard, his head spinning.

He sat in bed, very still and white and thoughtful, his mind spiralling into turmoil.

_Was this really going to be over? Would he never get to speak with his star again?_

At one point, his face cracked into a painful grimace.

"I basically asked him if he missed his oppa..."

_Min Yoongi, you pabo._

*

D-Day came all too quickly for the young general to come up with a sound tactical defence strategy, although he had roped in two advisors, Jin and Namjoon, to prepare for this momentous dispute.

Then again, he was kind of regretting involving them at all.

Jin was a nervous wreck, fussing over Yoongi's appearance, fretting about what colour of shirt his dongsaeng should wear and _no Yoongi you have to make a good impression in front of your future father-in-law_ which made Yoongi choke.

The thought of having to address Yang with some sort of family honorific made him gag.

He didn't particularly hate the man but the fact that Yang didn't seem intent on making his relationship with Lisa an easy one caused for Yoongi's animosity towards him to grow.

(He also remembered he had as yet to meet Lisa's actual parents and vice-versa, but that was another problem for another day.)

Namjoon on the other hand had written a few points--no, _whipped up a two-page speech in ten minutes_ \--and ordered him to memorise it.

Yoongi read the first two sentences and gave up.

Although he knew his leader meant well, there was no way he was going to strut into YG and impress the CEO by quoting half a dozen philosophical arguments to base his claim for dating Lisa.

He would do it the Min Yoongi way: _Speak fearlessly._ _Speak from your heart._

And if that wasn't enough to convince Yang, then he never deserved Lisa in the first place.

Yoongi wasn't one to believe in hope as such (unlike Hobi who paraded this concept in his own name) since he subscribed to the notion of working to make your own luck.

But these last few months getting to know Lisa, he had learned a thing or two about hope.

Or rather, she had given him back the meaning he had forgotten....

_"Oppa look at the cherry blossoms! Waaahh so beautiful..."_

_"Go on, I'll take a picture." He laughed, noticing her wistful expression._

_She clapped and skipped underneath the tree, looking up dreamily at the branches._

_During their dates, it was common for them to_ _routinely pause for a mini photo shoot here and there. Lisa also made it a point to have him pose in return and he willingly obliged to be her muse._

_"Yoongi come see this!" Lisa gasped and pointed up. "Look look, it's a little nest!"_

_"Yeah?" he asked excitedly, joining her side and squinting up._

_Sure enough, nestled high up amongst the branches was a little mesh of sticks, dirt and leaves. As they watched, a small dark-brown bird hopped over to it with a tuft of grass in its beak and added it to its home_.

_"Oh he's still building it! I hope he finds a nice wife!" She whispered giddily, eyes shining._

_"Sure he will, if he puts effort into making it nice and cosy," Yoongi assured her."You needn't hope for that so much."_

_She giggled. "But it's good to hope, oppa. Hope is what pushes you on sometimes. Hope is that little light you give yourself when everything is too dark to see, when you're lost and all alone."_

_She let go of his hand and skipped along the path, laughing. "Hey, you coming, old man?" she teased._

_He was still staring at her, wondering how she could shake him up like that with just a few words._

_"Yeah yeah, I'm coming..."_

"Yoongi, we're here."

He was jolted from his reverie and his hands immediately flew to his tie beneath his dark coat, which seemed to be strangely tight round his throat. He huffed, wishing he could just tear it off.

On the verge of a hysterical breakdown, Jin had run to Taehyung (who also brought in Hoseok) for help on styling Yoongi's attire. And thus, the rest of the boys learned of his imminent stand-off with YG.

"It's like you're facing off the evil dragon to save your princess!" Taehyung gushed when they learned of the meeting.

"Or like Super Mario facing Bowser to save Peaches," Jin offered, eyes still twitching nervously.

"Or facing the Final Level Boss in an RPG!" Jungkook put in, his eyes shining.

"Or like Napolean marching into the Battle of Waterloo--wait no, that's not a good comparison," Jimin said hastily, retracting his comment at Yoongi's glare.

Needless to say, all the extra attention got on his nerves but he bit his tongue and kept mum--he knew the boys meant well.

He managed to politely talk his way out of wearing one of Tae's Gucci shirts because he was terrified of staining it and facing the maknae's wrath later.

Thus he settled for a simple white button up and black tie (that Hoseok lended him) over black pants and his black coat to hide everything. Thank goodness it was chilly weather outside.

He now glanced up at the famous YG building which his sunbaes BIGBANG had practically built. It was intimidating and exhilarating at the same time. He pulled his beanie down low.

"I'll be going in then," he muttered to the two boys waving at him from the car. Namjoon gave him a thumbs up, while Jin mimed at him to pat his hair.

The boys had prepared meticulously in advance together with YG staff, lest they'd be spotted by fans. It would raise quite an uproar if Yoongi was caught outside YG headquarters. They had informed Bang-PD of Yoongi's situation and although his CEO offered to mediate on the affair, Yoongi declined: he was going to fight for Lisa on his own terms.

As arranged, YG staff bowed Yoongi into the lobby and led him to what he presumed was Yang's office.

He took the opportunity to glance around as they marched briskly, feeling warm at the thought of stepping in the ghostly footprints of his girlfriend that had probably traipsed all throughout this building.

_This_ would be the dark stairwell she mentioned running quickly down with Jisoo in the early hours, the one that gave her goosebumps.

Oh and _that_ would be the famous YG canteen, even though T.O.P sunbae had claimed that it wasn't all that good on national TV. Lisa however had nothing but praises for the food served there. He would have to sample some for himself to find out.

_This_ would be the hateful black door she said she kept stubbing her toe on, the second door on the left, just on the third level landing.

That would be _the hell room,_ as she called it, a.k.a the practice room, where she and the girls slogged and sweated it out on a daily basis.

And _this_ door would be her CEO's office.

_Oh wait it_ _was._

*

"And how exactly did that happen Suga-ssi?" Yang demanded, leaning forward on his clasped hands. Yoongi was glad there was the desk separating them because he was increasingly fearing for his life as the interrogation proceeded.

The man had quickly skipped through the formalities and went straight to grilling him. He had the same maniacal glint in his eye as his hyung when he was searing the beef in the pan, the orange flames shooting up into the air.

Yoongi took a deep breath, keeping firm hold of the chair beneath him. "It was after the first performance after the...the scandal broke out, sajangnim. I...I had taken an interest in her since debut but that day I saw her crying and I just...I wanted to comfort her, somehow. So I followed her and spoke to her...."

"And then how did you move on to...ahh...date?"

He patiently answered Yang, who fired missile after missile, bombarding Yoongi ceaselessly. The gunfire didn't let up even once, but Yoongi countered the attack grimly, refusing to buckle under the pressure of the titan in front of him.

"I'm still not convinced," Yang sat back in his chair, folding his arms. "Out of all idols, Lisa caught your eye. Why?"

"Well, she is indeed eye-catching--"

"I'm sure many people share that view, Suga-ssi," Yang interrupted. "You need to come up with something more convincing."

"...eye-catching, in both personality and physicality," Yoongi continued, as though he hadn't been interrupted, "but...I think I was taken by how much passion she displays for her craft. You can feel the emotions she conveys: in her rap, in her dancing, in her singing, the way she interacts with the audience. In short, she's a very charismatic performer."

"That is called admiration. Surely, you would know the difference between admiration and infatuation no? Besides there are other talented performers in the industry, within her own group no less."

Yoongi exhaled slowly. "Sajangnim, I-"

"Moreover, what do you expect from her? And don't tell me it's not sex, son--at one point or another, you're going to do it. Don't play innocent. And what if Lisa finds herself in a compromising situation, hmm? You know what I mean. And don't give me bull about protection--there's always the chance of mistakes."

Yang's brows furrowed beneath his peaked cap. "Suga-ssi, I know. I know what your're thinking. You're thinking, _what a jerk_. You're thinking, _he doesn't understand_. But I do: I _do_ understand.

I saw Lisa grow up. I saw Lisa fight against her fatigue to perform the monthly evaluations. I saw Lisa cry. I saw Lisa stay behind in the dorm while everyone else went home or on holiday. I saw her watch as one by one her friends left. I saw Lisa debut.

She is finally living her hard-earned dream. And for you to come and tear down her dream through irresponsible actions would be such a pity. She has a bright future."

Yang leaned forward. "Suga-ssi, I really don't think you'd be of benefit to the girl. If anything, it's the opposite: you would only prove to be a distraction, a liability and possibly even an embarrassment. I'm sorry, but that is the truth."

Yoongi was sinking fast: he was up to his neck in a treacherous quicksand, his chest being sucked dry of air.

Bullet holes riddled his body, invisible machine guns chattering as they pumped him full of metal, blowing him apart piece by piece, destroying him.

He was pathetically flailing around like a hapless fish on the brink of death.

All the questions, all the doubts, all the insecurities he had locked up at the back of his mind after taking the plunge: they had now burst out of their cages and reared their ugly heads, shrieking in a horrible cacophony.

They assaulted him mercilessly as he tried in vain to seek cover from the onslaught. It was however a losing battle; he might as well have tried walking in the rain without an umbrella and expecting to remain dry.

"Sajangnim please, hear me out." _Pathetic._ "I am aware of all the issues you mentioned--"

"Yet, you still persisted. Thought you'd push with your luck eh? Thought you'd be the underdog so that you could boast to your friends of ---what's the word you young people use these days? _hooking up_ _,_ with the desirable Lisa of Blackpink. So that you could boast that you managed to acquire one of YG's treasures without anyone knowing."

Then Yoongi felt it--a spark of rage, a burst of fury-- brewing a storm deep within him.

He found himself once again facing those thugs in the back alleys of Daegu as they surrounded him and pulled at his clothes, demanding his hard-earned cash. And when they took what they wanted, they pushed him to the ground.

**_It's over for ya, loser_** _,_ they jeered.

Their faces suddenly morphed into Yang: multiple Yangs sporting the same cap and wearing the same sneer.

Yoongi wiped his wet cheeks and slowly climbed to his feet, fists up as he glared straight into their taunting eyes.

_No_ _it's not over_ , he gritted, _not while I'm still standing. Not while I'm still fighting._

_Not yet._

Yoongi jumped up, startling the CEO.

"Sajangnim," Yoongi said, still polite, "will you please hear my side of things and then speak your mind again? I wish to explain my reasons for dating Lisa but you are not giving me the chance."

And then Yang gave him a strange smile, if you could call it that. It was more of a satisfied smirk. He tilted his head. "Hmm.... I apologise: Take it away then."

Yoongi sat down and steeled himself. He was going to pour his heart out, bare himself in front of this stranger about his feelings for a girl. Feelings that were so fragile and vulnerable, they still had as yet to blossom.

But Yoongi had decided he'd speak truthfully and now was the time--he would have faith in Lisa, in himself, in their trust for each other.

He would give himself some hope.

"It's true that there are other charismatic performers," he began slowly, "but for me Lisa stands out. There is something about her that draws you in.

And in these past months getting to know her, I am still learning. I am still questioning why I am so attracted to her. Believe me, Yang-ssi, I had my moments of doubts, and some of them will never go away..." He paused, swallowing.

"Was I only seeing Lisa because of my admiration for her? Were these feelings truly because I liked her? Would these feelings die and wither away eventually? Does she even like me the same way? And what if she is only using me to become more famous?

Questions like these crowded my mind for a long time sajangnim, and some of them I still don't have an answer to. Others I am still afraid to consider as well. In time, I hope I will have a solid answer to give you."

"So you don't really love her." That short statement, uttered so impassively, so simply, hurt more than Yoongi expected.

It was like a punch to his gut leaving him winded.

Yoongi bowed his head. "It's...it's too early to say....I don't want to rush headlong into a relationship and end up potentially hurting her...and myself. I...I want to get to know her better."

"Oh?"

The CEO sounded mildly surprised and Yoongi picked up right away.

"Yes. Surely you know...something important as a relationship takes time to grow and must be nurtured accordingly. I like Lisa. Very, very much. However, I do not intend to repeat mistakes...I am still in the process of deciding whether I love her or not. And she needs to find out the same for herself. Otherwise, if the feelings are not mutual...the relationship would soon turn into a bitter poison and possibly even...ruin us."

"Dramatic," Yang clicked his tongue, "but I believe I see your point. That's quite wise." He leaned forward again, lowering his voice ominously. "And what if, say, Lisa finds out that she doesn't feel the same way about you? What then?"

He stiffened immediately. Yang was eyeing him like a hawk.

Yoongi tried to breathe normally.

Ever since he started seeing Lisa, it had become his primary fear--the fear of being rejected and abandoned, discarded like a pair of worn socks, once again.

Lisa's happy face popped up in his mind.

_Was she really happy with him?_

_Was it all an act she put up?_

_Did she really like him for who he was: a shy, somewhat taciturn rapper with an unrivalled passion for music?_

_Or did she like the glitz, the glamour, the grandeur that came along with his name?_

"She...she likes me..."he blurted uncertainly.

"Does she really Suga-ssi?" Yang looked at him with a stern expression. "Have you asked her directly?"

No he hadn't, but he had _observed_.

_Her smile_ : shy yet trusting when he unexpectedly held her hand during their second date, squeezing his fingers tightly when people passed them by. Her smile was a permanent fixture on her face from there on, accompanying his daydreams and chasing away any negative clouds that threatened to overshadow his day.

_Her laugh_ : Loud, bubbly and extremely contagious. He remembered the first time she laughed openly in front of him was when she had devoured so much food on their date he had been genuinely horrified, concerned that she was being kept starving. She guffawed so loudly even passers-by turned their heads.

_Her pout_ : concerned and anxious whenever he told her he hadn't yet eaten during their nightly video calls. Those were perhaps the only times she had looked upset, and the only times she had threatened she wouldn't respond to his calls unless he ate. Sustenance was an extremely important issue for Lalisa Manoban, more so after she came to know of his past.

_Her reprimands_ : firm but gentle, reminding him to not dwell on his insecurities, because he was so much _more_. Offering consoling words and hugs whenever they met up after a heavy conversation because, to his amazement, she actually _understood_ about doubts and insecurities to some extent, and it was like a breath of fresh air.

_Her admiration_ : once he had shyly offered to play _any_ Disney piece she requested on the synthesizer during a Face Time session in his lab and her awe-struck expression after he finished made him feel like the most accomplished musician alive.

(She clapped gleefully like a kid, yelling so loudly for an encore that her members barged into her room to shush her and Yoongi could only look on in amusement as they tackled Lisa to the ground. They were such an adorable mess.)

So was all that just a facade?

Weren't all those tender moments they shared proof enough that she liked him, that she cared about him?

_Not enough,_ whispered the malicious voices, _maybe she only sees you as a one-off fling, a guinea pig, before she moves higher up the ladder and leaves you behind for more attractive prey._

_Maybe she merely pities you._

_Maybe she sees you as something broken, something that needs fixing : y_ _ou_ **_are_ ** _damaged after all._

_Maybe for her, you're just a charity case._

Yoongi's head was starting to ache. Raising his dull eyes, he saw Yang drumming his fingers impatiently on the table.

"Well?"

"I...I think she...likes me..." he repeated.

Yang sighed. "And if in reality, she doesn't? What will your reaction be?"

Yoongi chewed on his bottom lip. "I...I...let her go," he choked.

Even the thought of seeing her laughing with some other man hurt, his heart torn apart by a thousand needles. He swallowed hard, summoning his last shred of pride.

"I will always cherish her as an important person in my life, sajangnim, no matter how our relationship turns out...even if you intend to end it all. My feelings for her, although still undeveloped, are _real,_ and you cannot tell me otherwise. She...makes me so happy. I can just be myself with her, she doesn't expect me to be _more_.

And in the last few months getting to know her...she...she taught me new things...reminded of important things as well. If you intend to stop us from being together, I am afraid that I am going to fight back, because I am selfish, and I don't, _don't_ want to let go of her.

But...if she doesn't want to commit to a relationship...to _us_...then...I will try to respect her opinion. If it makes her happy...I'll do it..."

Yoongi didn't know where the strength to say all that came from. He felt strangely weightless, his body light and devoid of sensations.

His mouth had moved of its own accord: the words spilling out sounded foreign to his ears.

It had been a fairly steady stream of consciousness, pouring out directly from his soul.

He felt drained: talking about his emotions always had that effect on him.

More than anything right now, he wished he was in the backseat of that small, unpretentious vintage cinema he and Lisa had discovered, munching on snacks in the practically empty, dusty auditorium as the black and white movie played out in front of them.

It was almost like they had stepped into the past, where they could pretend they weren't idols restricted by the industry, but two young people on the verge of falling in love.

A distinct low whistle interrupted his train of thought and he looked up at Yang.

To his shock, the older man in front of him was clapping slowly, his face breaking into the first, genuinely warm smile since Yoongi walked in.

"I'm impressed Suga-ssi," Yang complimented. "Many people say you are a cold, unfeeling person. But now I'm starting to wonder if anything they say about you is true..."

He regarded the frozen boy in front of him. "Suga-ssi, I may not be an expert, but I do recognise when a person is speaking sincerely, from the heart. And that's what you were doing. _That's_ what I was looking for: your raw, honest thoughts on this whole affair, on your relationship with Lisa. Thank you for sharing--it mustn't have been easy."

Yoongi dared to hope, dared to light himself a little candle, the tongue of fire blazing in the dark. "Sajangnim...?"

"In my book, you passed the test," Yang said casually, as if those mere words didn't have the power to make Yoongi's insides explode into a blazing inferno of joy, his heart pounding at a dizzying pace, the ground falling away from his feet as he hurtled into outer space like a rocket and touched the sun, dancing amongst the swirling galaxies.

Amidst all the chaos taking over his brain, he faintly registered Yang saying: "But we don't know what Lisa thinks about all this."

Yoongi fell back to earth, slamming so hard he jolted in his chair.

"Uh...yeah...true..."

"Would you like to know?"

_Very much,_ Yoongi almost shouted. In reality, he managed a small nod.

The CEO once again smirked, as if he had been waiting for Yoongi's reply all along. He stood up, with Yoongi following suit.

"Well then that's perfect. I shall interview Lisa in the same manner as I have done to you to discern if she is as committed and devoted to your relationship as you seem to be. And you, Suga-ssi, will be watching it all from the security room."

"You planned this all along, didn't you, sajangnim?" Yoongi said shrewdly. The older man nodded.

"First and foremost, I care about my artists. I care about their career. I want to make sure that important decisions are taken with full awareness of the implications and consequences...Lisa must understand what she is getting herself into. If she is not strongly convinced of her own decision...well...let's just say the house with solid foundations can withstand the storm far longer than a wooden hut built on sand."

*

He waited, the previous elation from his victory over the enemy ebbing away as he watched Lisa enter Yang's office and sit down, her hands on her lap.

This was entirely her battle now.

All he could do was watch, and hope. He disliked having to depend on such a fragile, flimsy and vague concept but it was all he had: it was all Lisa gave him.

She looked nervous, pressing her glossy lips together into a thin line. She didn't have eye-liner, which probably meant she had just woken up. He had seen her without eye-liner before. He found it cute since she looked so much younger and vulnerable.

Briefly, he mentally thanked YG for the excellent quality of the security cameras he was currently monitoring together with other staff.

Yoongi had jammed the earbuds into his ears and cranked up the audio since without microphones, he obviously couldn't hear clearly.

But that cunning man took care of this detail as well, asking Lisa to speak up because he had an ear infection and thus couldn't hear clearly.

Yoongi had to smile when Lisa's brow creased in concern.

"Sajangnim, are you sure you cannot wait to see me? Maybe when you're feeling better..."

"I'm not dying yet, Lisa-ya," Yang chuckled and Yoongi immediately felt that petty jealousy rearing its head when she smiled back, pearly teeth showing.

"Well, let's get down to it then. I called you in here to discuss something important..."

Yoongi watched the interrogation, his eyes glued to the blonde. Although she had stiffened in surprise at first, she admitted to dating Yoongi right away. Her voice quivered slightly, her answers laced with wariness.

Yang asked her more or less the same things he had asked Yoongi, gradually proceeding towards the more weighty questions.

"So Lisa, I know this will be hard to answer but I want you to think hard and assess your feelings very carefully regarding Suga." Yang told her, leaning forward "do you think you love him?"

Yoongi cringed at the frankness of the question, slightly irked that Lisa has to undergo such intrusive questioning by a man she clearly respects.

For himself, he couldn't care less if it meant winning the battle--he didn't care if it meant stripping himself down to the core, for her.

She shifted in her seat, hands tucked underneath her thighs, like a schoolkid awaiting a scolding.

"It's...early days," Lisa said shyly,"but...I like him very much, sajangnim. Sometimes, I still can't believe someone like him would even look at someone like me and...and consider me worthy enough to date."

"Lisa..." His fingers trailed over her figure on the screen, saddened at her words.

_Why couldn't she see that she was so amazing and beautiful and deserved all the happiness in the world, something he was still unsure he could give her?_

_Doesn't mean he wouldn't try though._

"Hmm... you were aware of the dating ban, correct?"

"Y-yes sajangnim..."

"Why did you break it then? Was it your manager? Did he coerce you to accept Suga's offer for a date?"

"Oh no! Manager oppa has nothing to do with this!" she protested,"please, don't fire him or anything...he's a really good friend to me and puts up with everything I do. Please sajangnim...."

"He broke the rules of YG, _my rules_ , Lalisa. As did you, but let's leave that aside for now. Your manager is an employee in my company, and he disobeyed my orders. How can I guarantee your safety and care under such an employee? He must be disciplined one way or another."

Lisa looked at her boss beseechingly. "Sajangnim...I understand your reasons but...I will only say this: he meant well. He was...the best manager I could have had and he always tried to be accommodating, for my sake. It's my fault he'll lose his job. If there's anything I can do to overturn your decision..."

Yoongi gritted his teeth. _No, don't take the blame, Lali. It's my fault, you idiot._

"My my, that was quite the passionate outburst," Yang chuckled. "When did you become so vociferous? A few months ago, you could barely look me in the eye without stumbling over your words."

Her lips quirked into a broad smile.

"Yoongi," she said simply.

Yoongi's breath hitched in his throat. A deathly silence blanketed the dark, puny room as they waited for her to elaborate.

"Yoongi always says to speak fearlessly, from the heart," her hand slid over her chest to illustrate," especially about things and people you care about. He says that way, even if you end up losing in the end, you went down fighting for those you love and proved to the world that you care, even when everyone says otherwise."

She gave another small smile. "I guess I'm trying to follow what he says."

Yoongi tried to play it cool as the staff around him burst into admiring whispers.

He tried to act nonchalant, as though he had been expecting her to freaking quote him word for word and face down her boss _like that._

Yet it was humanly impossible to ignore the frenetic pounding of his heart and the stupid stinging in his eyes.

"You learn a lot from him?"

"Yes sajangnim," Lisa replied eagerly,"He's really cool and does what he sets out to do. People think he's cold, but they're wrong...he's like Jennie unnie...introverted. Plus he's not too comfortable with crowds invading his space.

Once you get to know him, he's this sweet, kind man who is always putting me first....although I don't like him doing it too much, in case he forgets to look after himself.... and he's such a good musician too, he is really passionate about music. And he's always fighting himself to be a better person, to leave his insecurities and doubts behind. I really admire him for that, he inspires me. Oh and when he smiles, it makes you soft for him. And oh, his laugh..."

Lisa clapped a hand to her mouth to stop herself, her eye widening in embarrassment as her boss chuckled.

Yoongi had practically turned into a statue, transfixed.

_Did she really think about him like that?_

"Sure sounds like somebody is smitten to me," Yang smiled and Lisa blushed.

"But, Lisa-ya," her boss said soberly, "what does _he_ think? Does he think of you the same way?"

She scratched her head. "Ummm...we never really spoke about it...but...maybe? He wouldn't be still going out with me if...if he didn't like my company...right?"

Yang shrugged. "I wouldn't know. When was the last time you spoke with him? This morning?"

Yoongi scowled, balling his fists.

_What was Yang planning?_

"Uh...two days ago..." Lisa said uncertainly. Her brow furrowed. "I've been trying to contact him but he hasn't replied. And neither has he seen my texts.It's a bit strange...."

"Indeed," Yang cooed, feigning sympathy.

Yoongi felt like reaching through the screen and choking the man.

"Yeah..maybe he's a bit busy...or his phone died..."

"Or maybe he's started to grow tired of you," Yang suggested casually, "It's how a relationship starts to crumble you know...especially with you idols having such hectic schedules that keep you apart. The first signs of someone getting cold feet is the reduced amount of contact in between the couple."

Yoongi growled deep in his throat as Lisa's face creased in bemusement.

"I'm sure that's not the case, sajangnim..."

"How can you prove that?"

Lisa bit her lip. "I can't....unless he contacts me..."

"And if he says that his phone died? Will you believe him?"

"Umm...sure? What reason do I have to not to?" she asked, dumbfounded.

_You tell him, girl!_ Yoongi seethed, dreading the direction this discussion seemed to be headed.

"Hmmm..." Yang mused,"what if you find out that he's cheating on you? What would your reaction be?"

Yoongi choked on his tongue. Lisa looked stupefied.

"Sa-sajangnim?" She squeaked. "That's a bit..."

"Out of the blue? Yet nonetheless, still very plausible and should be considered. People are not always strong enough to stay faithful and loyal to their partner, Lisa-ya. This goes for both him and you. And so I ask you...what would your reaction be if you catch him cheating on you?"

Yoongi gnashed his teeth in rage. _How come Yang hadn't asked him anything like this? Why was he pushing Lisa? Leave her alone!_

At the same time however, a part of him was curious to learn her response.

Lisa fidgeted with her fingers.

"Well...I...I guess...I won't be happy," she said quietly. "But first, I'd want to know why he cheated on me...it might help me...move on? I don't know..."

"And if he avoids answering you?"

"Yoongi isn't like that sajangnim," she answered softly,"at least, not the Yoongi I've come to know. He would own up when in the wrong. I'm sure of it. He'll face the consequences...because that's in his nature."

"You've only known him for a few months and you can vouch for how he'd hypothetically behave?"

She hunched her shoulders. "I just know he's not the type of guy to just... suddenly change his mind about something." She looked her boss straight in the eye. "I trust him. I trust him to tell me straight to my face if he wants to break up. He's not a coward, he wouldn't resort to something as low as cheating behind my back. I'm certain of it."

Yoongi was acutely aware of the hushed murmurs in the background as his attention remained glued to the screen. He felt the faint bubble of irritation rising in his throat: this was personal. All the people he was stuck with in the tiny security room shouldn't be here, eavesdropping on Lisa's private thoughts.

"Hmmm....then what will your reaction be if he asks to break up because he's met someone else?"

She chewed on her bottom lip. Yoongi realised she had picked up the habit from him.

"I suppose...I would...try to be happy for him," she managed a wan smile,"even if I wouldn't want us to end...depends on the situation I guess...but I'd really like to at least remain as his friend...he's very dear to me and taught me a lot. I'd like to think I'd be...mature enough to respect his wishes and...let him go. He's a reasonable man and won't just decide we need to end things overnight just for the sake of starting over with someone else."

She exhaled. "But, I hope it would never come to that."

"That's assuming I would let you continue seeing each other Lisa," Yang said gravely making the girl's eyes widen.

Yoongi stood up, towering over the monitor. The staff next to him flinched and slowly backed away, foreseeing an imminent eruption.

Yoongi was breathing heavily. _Why that treacherous little sna_

"Sajangnim?" Lisa said in a small voice. "You're...you're asking me to..."

"Like I said before, you broke my rules," Yang began," The dating ban, although many deem it unrealistic and cruel, is to protect you for as long as possible. I am most definitely not against any of you dating, this is not a cloister, although right now it may feel like one.

But consider the public backlash from the press and all the immature fans cancelling on both you and Suga-ssi. Aside from the individual hate you will both receive, it will also affect your respective groups. It is also an unfortunate phenomenon that the female idol will receive more hate than the male idol.

Would you be able to cope with that amount of negativity directed at you on a daily basis?

Not to mention your other members. In this scenario, I believe Suga will escape unscathed--BTS have a drastically larger fan base than Blackpink's. Losing some fans won't really affect their popularity. But you and the girls are still trying to break even, you are still trying to cement your place in the industry. Not to mention those stupid rumours last year--Blackpink has suffered a big hit but miraculously, you managed to stay on top.

However, I feel it would be risky for another 'scandal' to emerge merely months later. Fans will cancel on your concerts and music show appearances, boycott your fansigns and generally drag you down. And that's without including the amount of damage the press can do when they find out that idols from the two hottest groups in the industry are dating.

Do you think it's really worth it, Lisa?

Your career is on the line here. You worked for almost six years, just to debut. I watched you grow. And in my opinion...it's foolish to hang on to a person, when both of you will most likely grow apart after a few years...you are still so young.

I would perhaps wait until around Youngbae's age to settle down for a serious relationship: you would have spent several years in the industry, and gotten more experience on handling the press."

Yoongi blinked, shaking his head as if he had just surfaced from deep underwater.

What Yang said made sense.

Too much sense.

And he hated to admit it.

_You selfish pig, you never really thought about how Lisa would be affected if your relationship was revealed did you?_

_You just assumed everything would work out somehow, because you were too cowardly to even think of letting her go._

_Despite all you said, you're just a coward._

_You pathetic, selfish piece of--_

"Lisa, I know this will be hard but I will have to make you leave Suga-ssi." Yang sighed, "unless of course you prefer to leave Blackpink, but I don't think that would be a very feasible option. Nevertheless, if you do choose Suga-ssi, I will do everything in my power to support you, perhaps you can turn to full-time modelling..." he paused, eyeing the silent girl in front of him before picking up again:

"But, personally, I think it would be selfish to leave your other members...Blackpink without Lisa, Jennie, Rose or Jisoo wouldn't be Blackpink."

The little snake was right and Yoongi was in agony.

Lisa stood to lose too much if her association with him continued to grow and blossom.

What's the use of fighting anymore?

She wouldn't choose him--her members are far more important. He understood that perfectly.

What would have been his answer if the question had been directed at him?

_BTS or Lisa?_

He didn't know either.

He didn't want to think.

He wasn't the hero Lisa thought he was.

He was just a pathetic snivelling coward.

Yoongi slumped in his seat. Any moment now, he would have to raise the white flag and surrender.

The war was over.

He had lost.

He was completely and utterly crushed.

The bitter tears of defeat threatened to drop from his eyes and since he was past caring whether anyone saw, he didn't react or move to prevent them from falling.

But wait a minute...

_Wait a minute, Min Yoongi._

_Didn't you say you'd fight Yang if he was going to stop you from seeing Lisa?_

Where had that confidence gone? Was he really going to give in like that?

Why couldn't he be... greedy?

Why couldn't he have both Lisa _and_ BTS? Same goes for her...they could have the best of both worlds.

Maybe he was being selfish...but then again, sometimes, hanging on to something precious warranted being selfish.

He was certain that nobody, _nobody,_ could replace Lisa. The girl with the sunny smile had changed him in ways he never expected.

To hell with all the fake fans, _they_ didn't need them.

He could make it work. _They_ could make it work.

Commitment to _their_ relationship would be the key ingredient to drive _their_ success.

Yes. He could do it. _They_ could do it.

_**...it's good to hope, oppa** _ **,** _Lisa said,_ _**Hope is what pushes you on sometimes.** _

**_Hope is that little light you give yourself when everything is too dark to see, when you're lost and all alone._ ** ****

Yoongi blinked, the tiny candle-flame blazing in the yawning dark, newly restored.

He turned his attention back to the screen, focused. _Trust in Lisa._

The battle was not over.

_Not yet._

"Well, Lisa? What's your decision?"

She lifted her head, her expression dazed. "Sajangnim...could I have some time? I...I would like to talk this over with Yoongi first before--"

"I want to hear _your_ opinion Lisa, not some consensual decision you both agree on. I want to know what Lalisa Manoban thinks, not what you and Suga decide is best. And I want to hear it _now_." Yang added, lacing his fingers together and resting his chin, observing her from beneath his peaked cap.

Yoongi saw her swallow, closing her eyes momentarily.

"I...I don't want to leave Blackpink...they're...they're..." her voice lowered into a soft mumble that he didn't catch.

"Louder, Lisa. Remember I can't hear well." Yang reminded.

"I said Blackpink...the girls....they're my sisters, my family. We basically grew up together as you know. I love them and...I can't imagine a future without them," she said brokenly," and like you said Blackpink wouldn't be Blackpink if the group's missing a member. I can't do that to my unnies--they gave up on pursuing more steady careers, and I can't let that go to waste..."

Yoongi squeezed his eyes shut. _Not yet not yet not yet_

"Well then, the choice is easy enough-"

"But I don't want to give up on Yoongi either." she interjected.

Yoongi opened his eyes.

"Why not? If you're truly certain of your mutual devotion for each other, then it wouldn't be a problem to wait for a few more years, right?"

"It sounds like a good idea sajangnim," Lisa conceded," but don't they say ' _out of sight, out of head'_?"

"You mean ' _out of mind_ '?" A smile tugged at Yang's lips, amused by the girl's slip-up. "But yes, you have a point, that is indeed the saying."

"We haven't been dating each other for long," Lisa continued,"I'm...I'm afraid the inevitable...cooling down would happen, if we were to take a break and focus on work. And I don't want that. Yoongi is important to me, and I barely have scratched the surface of who he really is. I'd like to get to know him more before I can truly say that yeah, I want to be with him forever. I don't want to lose the spark we have right now, when...when things are just starting out....if that makes sense?" she finished hesitantly.

Yoongi could only stare in open-mouthed amazement.

Just who was this wise, eloquent stranger with the same body and voice as the giggly, playful and mischievous girl he thought he knew?

"Don't you think you're being greedy wanting both things? You wouldn't be able to handle juggling your relationship and your career."

Lisa suddenly leaned forward, her brown eyes fierce, all traces of submission gone.

"Wouldn't I?" she asked.

Yoongi thought his jaw had dropped somewhere near his knees. Judging by the collective gasps behind him, he wasn't the only one taken aback by her challenging question.

Yang however, remained frustratingly impassive. "Elaborate on this point then. _Convince me_ that dating Suga isn't a ticking time bomb, liable to destroy all that you have worked for these past years."

Lisa took a deep breath.

"Sajangnim, I know it won't be easy," she began, her voice gradually growing stronger," I'm not that naive to implicitly think that there won't be obstacles in our way. But I want to take that risk. I want to...because my members and Yoongi are both close to my heart, and I want them both. Don't you think that sometimes, you have to be selfish to keep precious things from being lost?

I know the negative impact a dating revelation would have...also considering that many fans would prefer I had chosen someone other than Yoongi, I don't think many would be comfortable with us...but provided both Yoongi and I stand together, I believe we can get through the storm..."

"My unnies and I talked about this."Lisa added after a pause, "we agreed to support each other once we eventually become involved in a relationship, even if it means the possibility of Blackpink's decline in popularity.

We all agreed that even if all the fans leave us, and only one Blink remains, we will still gladly perform for that one true fan who stood by us, respecting our choices just like any other human being.

Blackpink means a lot to me, to us: it's our life. But our individual happiness is important too: Jisoo unnie says the important thing is to be mature about our choices and and not rush things, but let Time take its course."

"Oh she did, didn't she?" Yang muttered darkly. "Of course she did, I'm not even surprised...she was basically encouraging you...I'll have to have a word with that girl..."

He turned back to Lisa and Yoongi leaned forward eagerly, still breathless after her speech.

She had been so brave and calm and collected, standing up to her boss. She shone like the star she was.

He waited in apprehension as Yang made a show of considering her answer, humming and frowning, prolonging the torture.

Lisa had reverted back to her previous tense posture, uneasiness clear in her darting eyes.

"Well Lisa-ya, I'm impressed by your mature responses. It is evident that you are aware of the implications your relationship with Suga can have on your future. Yet you still are adamant on seeing him...I'm afraid I will have to withhold my answer to your request indefinitely, for the time being. And in the meantime, you are not permitted to contact Suga-ssi in any form or you will face harsh repercussions," Yang said sternly.

He watched Lisa wilt in her chair, her eyes swimming in the pooling tears.

"But sajangnim, I thought--"

"Lisa-ya, I will let you off just this once with a warning. Until we speak again, please try to stay out of trouble. You are dismissed."

Yoongi's heart was skittering all over the place.

_That's it?_

_After all he had said, that heartless snake was still going to plough ahead and ignore Lisa's impassioned arguments?_

"Sajangnim.... what about my manager?" Lisa pleaded, now clearly distressed. Her knuckles could be seen whitening as she gripped her phone tighter.

Yang threw her a quick, nonchalant glance as he stood up, gathering a few papers on his desk.

"Oh, I'll probably dismiss him soon. Rules are rules you know."

Yoongi ripped out the earbuds and ran.

*

Feet pounding towards that snake's lair, he ignored people's questioning stares, too angry to think of taking the elevator.

His lungs burned from running up stairs but he didn't give a damn right now: that snake was going to pay for betraying him and trampling all over him and Lisa like that. Yang was going to pay, oh he was definitely going to make that hateful son of a--

His phone buzzed, and he was going to ignore it but it kept ringing incessantly until with a snarl, he brought it out and swiped to take the call.

"WHAT?" he bellowed, "I don't have time--"

"Suga-ssi" said Yang calmly.

Yoongi braked so hard he almost slipped down the staircase.

"You..you...you lied!"Yoongi growled, panting as he held on the bannisters. "You lied about everything!"

"On the contrary, Suga-ssi, I was merely testing Lisa and testing _you._ " Yang returned, "seeing you so concerned for Lisa, as well as hearing her views on this affair...I think you two have won today, congratulations. You will find Lisa just down the corridor from my office, she has just left. Maybe she needs a little cheering up--"

Yoongi practically _flew_ up the remaining flights of stairs, light-headed with the lack of oxygen. Or was it euphoria?

Whatever it was, it spurred Yoongi on until finally, _finally,_ he burst onto the landing of the seventh floor.

And there, walking down the corridor, was the hunched slender back of a familiar tall girl.

She turned when she heard the thundering footsteps behind her. Her red-rimmed eyes grew round as saucers.

"Lisa!"

"Yoongi?"she gasped as he rushed upon the stupefied girl.

He snatched her up, laughing and whirling her in the air as she squealed.

"Let me down! Let me down! Am I dreaming? Let go!"

He eventually did let her down, his legs trembling with exhaustion and adrenaline such that he had to hold on to her shoulders.

"Yoongi? It's really you? What happened? What are you doing here?" Lisa asked dazedly.

He simply hugged her close, too overwhelmed to explain. She melted into his embrace, her lean arms curling tightly round his back.

"You," he said hoarsely, drawing back to cup her face," you were brilliant..."

Her brows knitted in confusion but she soon closed her eyes as he stroked away the wet trails her tears had left behind down her cheek

"Someone's gonna see us," she whispered,"sajangnim...."

But she didn't back away from Yoongi.

"Let him," Yoongi answered with a smirk and she gazed back in confusion.

"Oppa, how did you--"

"Ahh there they are!" exclaimed a familiar reedy voice.

They turned in unison, with Lisa jumping in front of Yoongi as Yang himself appeared together with an army of his personal staff accompanying him.

"Sajangnim, I can explain," she began, her voice trembling. She was pushing Yoongi behind her as she spoke. "I just called him to meet him here before--"

"Lisa," Yoongi whispered, taking her hand and squeezing it, "it's okay. We're okay. Look."

Yang was shaking his head at them.

"I suppose this was bound to happen one day," he said wryly. "Lalisa, it's alright. I was testing you and Suga-ssi to determine just how committed you are to your relationship. I think it's suffice to say you both passed the test."

Lisa stood and gaped at her boss. "But...but..."

"Your manager will be disciplined, but not dismissed from the company. He shall carry out his duties with you as before. And I apologise for forbidding Suga-ssi from contacting you...it was a precaution in case you tried to prepare for the interrogation. He was watching over you the whole time I was interviewing you as well, after I interrogated him. Now with that said...I, Yang Hyun-Suk, hereby give you, Lalisa Manoban, permission to date Moon Yoongi."

"It's _Min_ Yoongi, sajangnim," hissed a harried-looking secretary from his right, blinking rapidly behind her glasses.

"That's what I said." Yang rolled his eyes. "We can sign the papers later. For now, I believe you have some catching up to do? Lisa, why don't your show your new beau around?"

"Yes, sajangnim," Lisa said shyly, snapping out of her stupor. Her face broke into a toothy smile and she bowed. "Thank you for listening to us, sajangnim."

Yoongi hastily followed, bowing so low his nose almost touched his knee. "Thank you sajangnim. You won't regret your decision." he said fervently.

"That will do, Suga-ssi....or shall we call each other more informally now? I won't mind being called abeonim, what do you say?

Yoongi went off into a fit of coughing as Lisa thumped his back, almost throwing him to the ground with the force of her hand.

"I will see you around. And please behave!" Yang called over his shoulder as he walked past them, followed by his staff and disappeared round the corner.

The boy and girl glanced at each other, a slow grin spreading across their faces.

Lisa was the first to crack up laughing, joined by Yoongi soon after.

*

"Ok, stay there, I'll go get some!" Lisa chuckled and ran away to the serving table. Yoongi smiled fondly as she skipped up to the serving staff, chatting happily with them.

She had taken him to the canteen after he bashfully asked if they could maybe check that out. She laughed after hearing his stomach growl and dragged him down to the place.

There were thankfully few people dining: he didn't feel like being under scrutiny again, like some exotic specimen in a zoo.

Lisa had quickly led him to an isolated part of the canteen, next to a high black wall with water gushing down the side like a waterfall, creating soothing background noise.

She also brought them a tray piled with food and then cutely fed him, occasionally going 'ahh' when she held up the chunks of meat clamped in between the chopsticks.

"Is it good?"

"It is," he grinned, swallowing "but with you, everything's good."

She chortled. "You cheeseball!"

"Where do I get some water?"

"Ok, stay there, I'll go get some!"

He remembered he had still not called the boys to announce the wonderful news, so he picked up his phone and dialled Namjoon's number.

"Hyung! How did it go?" Namjoon asked eagerly when he picked up.

Yoongi suddenly heard muffled gasps and then crashes. He narrowed his eyes."What the hell is going on there?"

"Yoongi hyung! Did you win? Did you beat him?" Jungkook yelled.

"Did you guys kiss?" Taehyung demanded.

"Shall we come to pick you up? We're on standby," Jin informed.

"Did he say anything about the tie? We should have chosen a brighter colour, black was too boring" Hoseok muttered.   
"For goodness sake hyung, get your priorities straight!" Jimin bawled.

"How can I get my priorities straight when I'm not even straight myself?!"

"What"

"What"

There was a stunned silence and then Yoongi cleared his throat.

"Umm...is this a good time to say that Yang is cool with me dating Lisa?"

Another silence. Then--

"YOU DID IT HYUNG!"

Yoongi held the phone back at arm's length as a thunderous din emanated from the phone's speaker.

"You told your members?" Lisa grinned walking back to their table. She chucked a water-bottle at him and he caught it.

"Yeah, they're pretty excited. Taehyung thought I was too stuffy and boring to actually date so now that we have permission, it's really huge news for them."

She snuggled against him, stifling a yawn. "It's really huge news for me too. Oh and don't mind me if I sleep, I had been sleeping in--it's our off day."

"Hyung!" Namjoon gasped. He suddenly seemed to be in a quieter place and judging by his heavy breathing, seemed to have run a marathon.

"What happened Joon?"

"Nothing, I just ran to shut myself in my room." Yoongi heard a squeak as Namjoon plopped himself into his swivel chair. "So...you and Lisa huh? Congratulations. I still can't believe it."

"Me neither." Yoongi absently ran a hand through Lisa's hair and she hummed contentedly.

"It feels like...like..." he glanced down at the girl trying to find the right words to describe his happiness. "It feels like..."

"You're on top of the world?" Namjoon supplied. "On cloud nine? In heaven? Hang on, let me remember how that author described it exactly-"

"Heaven..." Yoongi said wonderingly.

_That's it._

"Joon, it feels like I'm in heaven," Yoongi smiled. He sensed Lisa's hold on him tighten.

"Oh? I thought you didn't really believe in heaven..."

"Well...people change. Ideas change." Yoongi took a moment to press a tender kiss to Lisa's temple. "I think I found my slice of heaven."

"Wow...so that's what love does to you, huh?" Namjoon asked in awe.

"Mhm...and I think I understand a bit more about your argument...the one about appreciating Life's blessings?"

"Yeah?"

"Mmm," Yoongi hummed, "You asked if one can truly be justified to say that one appreciates their fortunes if they hadn't fought to keep them in the face of adverse circumstances. Now I think I understand..."

"Because you both had to fight for your relationship, in order to stay together" Namjoon realised, sounding impressed. "Yes, hyung... you finally understood. I'm happy for you."

"I'll get back to you guys later."

"Cool. See ya dude."

Yoongi ended the call and noticed Lisa was sound asleep on his shoulder. She slept peacefully like a baby, clinging to his shirt.

He quickly grabbed the opportunity to snap a few selcas of themselves, his smile growing broader after each snap of the shutter.

_When he was six he thought heaven was in the sky._

_When he was twelve he thought heaven was an indefinable mysterious place beyond the stars._

_When he was sixteen he decided heaven was not real after all._

_Now in his early twenties, he realised heaven wasn't a definite place, a religious destination or some ambiguous astral concept._

_Heaven could be a person you're willing to stand by for a long long long time, because they were the source of peace, the fountain of happiness._

_And maybe it was still early days, but Min Yoongi thought it was safe to say that he had found his heaven in the form of Lalisa Manoban._

Yoongi leaned down to brush another chaste kiss on her forehead.

"I love you, Lisa" he tested, immediately loving the ring of that simple sentence.

He didn't expect her to stir and turn her face up to meet his eyes but she did just that, taking him by surprise. His face ignited under her soft gaze.

"I know. I love you too, Yoongi" Lisa answered tenderly, intertwining their hands together.

And all Yoongi saw were the stars dancing in her eyes, growing larger and closer as he dipped his head and gently kissed her soft lips for the very first time.


	6. My Wish (Part 1)

One moment, he was pleasantly proposing to the girl of his dreams in a field of sunflowers beneath a bright, cerulean-blue sky.

"OPPA!"

The next, Yoongi fell out of bed with a startled squawk.

Groaning, he sat up, rubbing his head. "Wha-what?"

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Lisa descended upon her boyfriend, showering him with kisses and throttling him with a bear hug.

"Uh-Lis...air...choking-" he wheezed, tapping her shoulder frantically as his eyes bulged in his head.

He heard a series of clicks and looked up to see Taehyung and Jungkook smirking down on them. Taehyung was holding a Polaroid while Jungkook had his trusty camera, shooting the scene like an MV director.

"Oh yes hyung keep that nice expression, perfect...yes yes widen those squinting eyes, like that, oh yes!" Jungkook grunted appreciatively as he moved around the couple to get better angles.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Shooting for the new GCF!" Taehyung giggled.

"You better not be!"

Lisa raised her face from Yoongi's neck. Her tender expression was enough to flush away his vexation at having his beauty sleep interrupted. His surroundings seemed to melt into the background when her face broke into that dazzling smile reserved only for him.

"I'm sorry for waking you but we couldn't wait to say happy birthday to daddy. Isn't that right babe?"

Yoongi grinned when he spotted his dog Holly gambolling and playing on the carpet with his dongsaengs. He whistled and stretched out his hand for his 'son' to run towards him for a greeting head rub. Yoongi also turned to bring his and Lisa's foreheads together, savouring her quiet giggles as he nuzzled her nose.

"Don't forget we're still here," he heard Jungkook say, his voice rather high-pitched.

Yoongi sighed but grudgingly gave the two boys a good-natured smile, which he thought took a tremendous effort that they should definitely appreciate, because it wasn't like him to dole out smiles for morning greetings. He was usually a grouchy morning person and didn't speak until he tasted coffee.

Having Lisa around, however, made him act different ( _"Because you're still whipped as heck even after all these years, duh"_ , _"shut up maknae"_ )

"That was pretty effective," Yoongi chuckled, slipping an arm round Lisa's waist to pull her close and brush a kiss against her cheek. "I don't remember ever waking up so quickly...maybe only Major Lee's wake-up call can top that."

"Oh thanks hyung it was my idea," Taehyung was smug.

"Oh then it was a horrible idea. Honey, why did you listen to that insufferable brat?"

"Hey!"

They all laughed at Taehyung's indignation and then Jungkook dragged him out of the room to give the couple some privacy, Holly following and yapping at their ankles.

(Taehyung almost got a slipper to his face when he cheekily asked Yoongi to reserve some space in his stomach "for a proper breakfast with actual food later" but luckily Yoongi's aim was sloppy.)

Immediately after they left, Yoongi wrapped an arm round Lisa's back and hooked another arm beneath her bent knees to carry her to his bed. She didn't stop giggling as she clutched his T-shirt tightly, which made him grin too.

Yoongi snuggled up with his girlfriend, pulling the blankets up to her chin and absently tucking stray tendrils of hair behind her ear. His bed was still deliciously warm and he felt the remnants of sleep tugging at his eyelids. He fought the temptation to slip an arm around her waist and just fall asleep again with her firm body close to his chest, where she belonged.

Having her so close like this after a long time apart finally made him feel at ease: he was home now.

This little time they afforded to spend together before they went their ways for their respective schedules was a welcome pause, a break from the dizzying fast routines their lives had become and he didn't want to waste it by merely sleeping.

Blackpink were currently abroad, busy with their first world tour, already moving on to the European leg of their globe-trotting adventure after touring in Asia.

Yoongi had been just as giddy as (if not more than) his girlfriend when Blackpink announced the tour: Lisa's excitement to perform and travel to see their Blinks around the world was contagious. It reminded him of his own memories and experiences he had with the boys.

He was extremely proud of her for finally achieving yet another dream.

However, he also felt the pang of missing her when they were still hugging as he congratulated her: they would be seeing very little of each other, what with Lisa jetting all around the world while Yoongi was completing his military obligations.

Yoongi and Jin had already been enlisted in the military for a year when Blackpink embarked on their tour.

The two men were currently visiting their dongsaengs after being given leave, close to Yoongi's birthday.

After much public debate following the BTS debacle, dubbed by many as the 'Scandal of the Millenium', with even bigger coverage than Tablo's fall from grace, those 'phonies on their high chairs' (one of Jennie's kinder nicknames for the government authorities), had decided that the boys would not be exempted from military conscription after all, despite their unprecedented achievements and invaluable contribution to the nation.

This announcement didn't sit so well with Jennie Kim, who was first and foremost utterly furious on her boyfriend's behalf and his future, along with a number of other reasons that had her livid ( _"how am I going to survive when Yoongi leaves and I'm stuck babysitting Lisa again?!",_ _"I'm not a baby, unnie!"_ ).

Taehyung had a hard time placating her fury--she even used her emergency anonymous Naver account to vent her frustrations online, which lasted three consecutive days, breaking her previous two-day streak when K-netizens lashed out at Lisa for having the majority of lines in their recent songs, but failing to surpass the four-day record she set after Bangtan's scandal erupted.

*

In the aftermath of the devastating events that rocked the K-pop industry, the boys decided to embark on a mini-hiatus to enjoy some relatively quiet time out of the spotlight while working on their next comeback, which Namjoon wanted to be their best yet: they had to show the world that no matter what, Bangtan Sonyeondan would always bounce back better and stronger than ever before. It was all-hands-on-deck for the seven of them.

They wouldn't let this setback keep them from rising up once again, like a phoenix re-incarnated from the ashes.

Yoongi had been preparing the skeleton for their next comeback from months prior to the scandal coming to light, laying out the groundwork and gradually fleshing out the ideas alongside Hoseok and Namjoon, and obviously with major input from the other boys. In fact, Yoongi considered his work practically done: now all he needed was wait for the others to finish writing their songs so that together they could choose which would make it to the album.

Because Yoongi and Jin, the eldest members, had decided now would be a good time to enlist and get that out of the way just before their comeback.

It was a hard decision, but Yoongi was confident it could work: for the music production part, he knew Joon and Hoseok were more than capable to follow his line of work and carry off where he started. Once he was back, he would help out with the editing and finishing touches.

As for his and Lisa's relationship, he was certain his absence wouldn't change much (Jin and Jisoo had been dating almost as long as them, and declared they felt the same.)

They had been going strong for years: they watched each other grow, stumble and then swoop in to pick up each other at the right times. And over the years, Yoongi noticed how he and Lisa matured and aged in some aspects, like fine wine that acquires that notable, enriched flavour, exuding elegance.

He noticed how his insecurities shrank, how his demons gradually grew tame and settled, content to lurk in their cages inside his head for longer and longer periods instead of roaming freely and wreaking havoc.

He noticed how her doubts of being worthy or capable gradually wore down at the edges. But her burgeoning confidence never replaced her bright, humble personality: as she said herself, she would always be the little Thai girl who just wants to dance and make people happy.

For all this, Yoongi would be eternally indebted to his younger self for hustling tirelessly until they finally became a couple. Lisa had been his pillar of support in everything he had gone through, her light shining like a star to guide him through the worst crisis to hit his group since debut.

Had such a calamity hit before, Yoongi knew his younger, insecure self would have crumbled underneath the combined weight of false accusations claiming they tarnished the K-pop industry's international image, combined with the mass hysteria fuelled by the media.

Yoongi knew that his younger self would have despaired at the way their loyal fan base was ridiculed and butchered brutally on all fronts when ARMY's rose up in an attempt to protect the boys from the seemingly endless vicious attacks.

Antis clamoured for their disbandment, insisting that the boy group's days were numbered, and that their egos were preventing them from doing the right thing and moving out to let new blood take over. _It is their hubris_ , sneered the antis, _that is the cause of their downfall. Your oppas aren't so innocent after all, huh?_

His younger self would have been utterly crushed when the higher authorities, almost as though fearing a national revolt in the face of such a vehement and violent outcry, caved in to the demands of so-called 'justice-seekers'.

Antis rejoiced in their victory, watching on in gleeful ecstasy as the national awards, merits and privileges bestowed upon BTS in the previous years were revoked, even the medal for the Order of the Culture of Merit. The boys were promised that all would be restored once their names were cleared from the scandal (but almost a year on after the culprits handed themselves over, and BTS were still empty-handed.)

Yoongi knew that with all that burden to carry, coupled with the baggage he was already carrying around, his younger self would have drowned in misery. He would have gone under and sunken like the Titanic.

But he was different now.

He understood that popularity was like a wave--it swelled and swelled until it crashed down just as fast as it grew. The trick was riding that wave, balancing both the rise and fall by being prepared to face both, especially the fall part. If you survived a nasty fall, or rode it well enough, you would be able to catch the next wave and ride again, once more.

Over the years, Yoongi had observed just how volatile the industry really was through observing its various treatment of fellow K-pop idols and Blackpink themselves. This turn of events just proved that nobody was immune to the terribly misjudged harassment and attacks hostile netizens dished out to whoever fell out of favour with them.

 _Are you afraid?_ Lisa would whisper on late nights when she sneaked over to his dorm. He didn't have the heart to escort her back, not when her presence was a welcome boon for his brooding mood. It was definitely selfish: they would be in even bigger trouble if an idol was caught at Bangtan's dorm but Lisa made him want to be selfish.

He liked sleeping flat on his back. Then she would scoot close to his body beneath the blankets, seeking his warmth and snuggling up against his side until he felt her gentle breath against his neck. She cupped his face and turned him to face her. His troubled gaze collided with her doe-like eyes.

 _Are you afraid of being forgotten?_ she would ask again. She always had a knack for reading his mind.

 _Sometimes,_ he sighed in reply. It was easy to confess his doubts in the semi-darkness. _What if we're not popular anymore?_

This niggling doubt remained lurking in the dark recesses of his mind: Yoongi was only human--wanting to cling on to the popularity wave was perhaps a weakness he wasn't so ready to admit, because he knew it was petty and shallow, that it was an inevitable cycle of life. Other bands would come after them, perhaps be more popular than they were...

Despite all their achievements, despite him knowing the answer to that question he asked of Lisa, he still wondered what it would be like when one day, BTS was no longer in vogue.

But as always, Lisa was there, soothing his troubled mind.

 _That won't happen,_ she said firmly, sealing her answer with a kiss on his forehead. _You're not one-hit wonders....you're BTS. You will endure...you will always be iconic. I know it._

Each time, he smiled gratefully and pulled her closer to kiss her properly, because she was merely echoing the very words he told her himself. Hearing her say it in her own way, uttered so simply but with such absolute conviction, was a thousand times more reassuring somehow.

And he fell asleep cuddling up with her, the ghost of a smile on his face....

 _The real goal of any artist_ , he had often told Lisa, _shouldn't be just to be popular. The real goal should be...to be iconic. To be iconic and endure, for a long time. Endurance is what makes an artist: if he is constantly present in the general public's conscious...that is how an artist will live on forever, even beyond his grave. Think Michael Jackson, or even that crooner guy Elvis. That's what we have to aspire to be, just like our BIGBANG sunbaes...._

The reason why he didn't crumble or sink in the wake of the scandal was simple enough: Min Yoongi was older, stronger and wiser now. He had BTS, his brothers. He had Lisa, and the rest of the girls in Blackpink. Together, they were stronger than a fortress wall, they were a _family_.

Min Yoongi knew exactly who he is and what he is worth. Nothing could persuade him otherwise. There was nothing the boys could apologise for: the evidence exonerated them of any wrongdoing, it was there for all to see, for all those who cared to find the truth instead of believing malicious, loony rumours.

So rather than waste his time trying to mend bridges and attempt to convince the sceptical, judging public that they were innocent as his leader was still bent on doing months after the events, Yoongi merely shrugged and went back to working on his music.

Thus, the storm passed in over his head, much like Namjoon's philosophical ruminations, and Yoongi dropped the mic on their antis.

>

While Yoongi and Jin were drafted into the military, the rest of the boys were busy planning more additions to their discography as well as exploring their own individual interests. They kept their hyungs well-updated with their activities:

Despite their new-found notoriety, Taehyung was still very much in demand and sought after by variety shows directors and K-drama producers. He could always be spotted poring over scripts, mumbling lines to himself, acting out parts and reviewing his meme face in the bathroom, whilst also discussing photography and posing with Jennie for endless photo shoot sessions in the dorm.

Jimin lent his voice for a handful of OSTs, which he was thoroughly thrilled to do. But he preferred helping Hobi teach dancing to the newest batch of trainees at BigHit. 

It was something both boys were very passionate and enthusiastic about since besides having the opportunity to pass on the torch directly to young trainees, the future representatives of BigHit, it was also a responsibility handed to the duo by Bang PD directly. They wanted to show him that just as he never gave up on them, they weren't about to give up on him either ("You're gonna get better and we're gonna get through this, cos we're all here for each other. Fighting!" as Jimin said when BTS video-called their boss after he was hospitalised.)

The Golden Maknae had probably the most eclectic to-do list: Jungkook was teaching himself advanced videography while also subscribing to intense online courses in English; expanding on his music-writing and drawing talents as well as working tirelessly on his plan to dominate the gaming world with his skills ( _"You can stay in the army as long as you want hyungs, my Overwatch stats have never been better"_ ).

But, perhaps, the one who surprisingly seemed to be in a state of flux, according to the boys, was Namjoon.

Yoongi learned how their usually calm and unruffled leader had days when he paced restlessly, unable to sit down and pen lyrics as per usual; days when he crumpled up pages in sheer frustration, unable to write properly, until the floor around him was littered with little crinkled paper balls; days when he sat blinking at the screen of his laptop, at a loss on what to do next; days where, on his unrelenting mission to make sure ARMY's did not feel abandoned, he hosted hours-long vlives, ending up exhausted and even sleeping at his desk.

Then there were the messily productive days: the ones where he would take to writing furiously, almost desperately, in a bid to free the feverish thoughtS seething and clogging up his mind. Yoongi knew that Joon didn't just write songs but also essays on any topic that piqued his interest (Namjoon once showed them an essay on the Instrumental Value of Vine References in Today's Dynamic Geo-Political Landscape and Yoongi felt incredibly confused just by reading the title.)

Namjoon would scribble and scrawl, his pen practically flying off the papers as he worked to translate the words into ink, stamped and captured on paper. These instances could last for extended periods at a time, with his members checking in occasionally, and sometimes leaving him a plate of food on the floor inside by the door, which was rarely touched (Jimin once even stepped in a forgotten plate that was growing greenish fur). Namjoon would emerge from the writing vortex and from his room in a grumpy, hungry, sleep-deprived but wholly satisfied state, the ghost of a grin adorning his face as he collapsed on the nearest couch in the living room.

Then there were the days, as the other boys reported, where Namjoon wandered about in a daze, smiling as he gazed into empty space; days where he sighed dreamily as he sat with his chin tucked in the crook of his elbows folded over each other on the table and stared out of the window (Taehyung reported to once have glimpsed rainbows in his hyung's eyes but Yoongi didn't believe him); days where he spent most of the time on his phone, grinning and giggling; days where his eyes misted over and a perpetual soft grin graced his face when Blackpink popped up unexpectedly in conversations, on TV, in some CF or other news.

Upon hearing about the latter type of days Joon had been having, Yoongi merely smiled knowingly. He had known about these kind of days: they had already started to make an appearance ever since Namjoon had gotten himself a girl-

Yoongi was abruptly drawn from his quasi-dream state when Lisa shifted, her body bumping unceremoniously into his side and jolting him awake.

She yawned, her eyes fluttering like a newborn's. She looked like a baby herself. He reached out to stroke her cheek, her growing smile making his insides churn.

He still marvelled how she was able to affect him like this after a good number of years dating, and with the same unwavering intensity as when he first set eyes on her.

"I guess we fell asleep," he croaked and she nodded tiredly, burrowing into his chest.

"Sorry I woke you up," she replied, her voice just as hoarse.

He glanced over at the alarm clock on his dresser. _11:01_

"Can we sleep in all day?" she mumbled but her stomach seemed to have other ideas, punctuating the brief pause after her question with a complaining rumble.

Yoongi grinned. "How about we grab some breakfast first?"

Then a thought suddenly struck him and he propped himself up on his arm. "When did you get back?"

She looked so soft and sleepy, unlike the fierce persona she donned on stage. Only he got to see her like this on mornings, strewn across his pillow like she had always belonged there. He could only smile down fondly and thank his lucky stars for having her in his life.

"Did you come here straight from the airport?" he asked again, carefully leaning down to graze his lips along her cheek and down the slope of her neck, greedily snuffling the blanket aside to reveal more of her slender throat.

The feathery light kisses gradually evolved into open-mouthed caresses as he lingered over her milky skin, savouring the faint traces of her tangerine body wash overtaking his nose.

"Mmm yeah" she said breathily and tilted her head to give him more access, which Yoongi showed his appreciation for by laving her skin with his skilful tongue. Her eyes fluttered with barely concealed pleasure. "There was some turbulence just before we landed but it's all good..." She drew back a little to smile up at him. "Ain't nothing gonna stop me from wishing you happy birthday in person. I missed you." She wrapped her arms round his neck, hugging him close.

Yoongi felt a stab of guilt as realisation slowly dawned on him. _She had actually flown all the way back here to surprise him on his birthday?_

"You're the best present I could ever have, today and everyday" he whispered, touched. He smiled brightly as an idea popped into his head. "Hey you must be dead-tired. Tell you what, why don't you sleep while I go get you breakfast in bed, how about that?"

He threw off the comforter and was about to slip out of bed when lean arms snaked around his torso, pulling him back in with surprising insistence.

"Pabo it's your birthday, I'm the one who's supposed to spoil you, not the other way round," she muttered, eyes closed, but there was a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Also, you should sleep too...you won't get to sleep in when you head back to the army." She paused. "And that's an order."

He pretended to sigh as he pulled the blankets back up over his body and tangled their legs together beneath the bedclothes. "Ahh, you got me there."

"You got me there what?" Lisa inquired, wiggling her eyebrows. "Be more specific, Private Min."

Yoongi leaned in and paused, gazing into her starry eyes.  
Then he kissed her, soft and slow.

"You got me there, Sergeant Manoban."

>

"So nice of you to _finally_ join us," Hoseok called meaningfully when Yoongi strolled in with Lisa clinging to his arm like a koala. "It's almost lunchtime you two."

Yoongi blinked, taking in all the people occupying Bangtan's living room.

Jennie was casually sitting sideways on Taehyung's lap, both of them engrossed in a conversation that seemed to consist of few words but a lot of lips and tongues.

Taehyung broke off when he noticed the couple had entered, flashing such a smug smirk that Yoongi wanted nothing more than to slap it off his face.

"Hey hyung, still got room for pancakes? Jin hyung is cooking up some more. Man I missed that crazy hyung, always stuck in the kitchen..."

Yoongi tuned out his dongsaeng's babbling and took a seat on the far side of the sofa.

Low voices in the kitchen could be discerned to be Jin and Jisoo, being all domestic as always and probably making out in between cooking or washing the dishes (Yoongi had walked in on them countless times to know it was routine.)

Then there were the single men: Jungkook, Jimin and Hobi, sprawled on the fluffy carpet and laughing at some programme on the TV.

Yoongi sometimes felt apologetic that they had to endure the presence of the couples, especially with Taehyung and Jennie's PDA, even though the latter were both a bunch of hypocrites who cringed or gagged when he and Lisa exchanged a simple cheek kiss.

YG had relaxed the dating ban but not officially, so all of them still had to be extremely cautious. Over the years, there had been some hair-raising close calls with the press, mostly Jennie and Taehyung, who were quite daring in public.

Those two simply could not keep their hands off each other, even after being told off again and again. They had been together for a good couple of years now, but still acted as though they had just gotten together last week.

"Happy birthday hyung!" Jimin came to clap him on the back as did Hoseok. Jennie stood up to give him a hug too.

"Happy Birthday Grandpa Yoongi!" she said teasingly. Yoongi rolled his eyes when she and the rest snickered, even Lisa. They had taken to teasing him more frequently lately.

"Ha ha ha. Very funny. I almost busted an appendix" he deadpanned. "You're a bad influence on her, Tae."

"Oh yeah?" Taehyung said defensively. "Do you ever hear me complaining when Lisa disses me on karaoke nights? Well do you? And her disses really hurt you know."

"I learn from the best," Lisa shrugged as she took a seat. "And it's just about some clothes, lighten up."

"Gucci is NOT just 'some clothes', it's a way of life," Jennie gasped, scandalised, "where did I go wrong when I was raising you?"

"Oh they're here! I thought I heard the boys bickering again," Jisoo called as she entered the living room balancing plates of food, followed by a beaming Jin similarly laden with steaming dishes. "Happy birthday, Yoongi, now eat up. You too, Lali!"

They set the plates down on the coffee table, a delicious aroma wafting and filling up the space in no time.

Yoongi's mouth watered at the sight of the spread his hyung had prepared. He grinned and grabbed a fork to shovel scrambled eggs and pancakes on his plate, reaching out for the pot of coffee at the same time. "You don't have to tell me twice!"

 _"Me likey, me likey likey likey!"_ Lisa sang to express her appreciation. She threw a finger heart at her unnie. _"Heart heart!"_

Jimin and Hobi immediately stood up to dance to Twice's choreography, which evolved into an all-out impromptu dance-off. Even Taehyung strutted over to join them, ending up utterly demolished when Jimin and Hobi simultaneously tackled him to the ground, tickling him all over as he thrashed and kicked his legs helplessly. They rolled on the floor in a giggling heap like a bunch of kids.

( _"Sometimes I wonder if I'm dating a three year old, and that makes me feel uncomfortably paedophilic"_ Jennie said.)

After all the excitement died down, they settled to watch some random movie as Yoongi and Lisa dug into their breakfast. Holly waited patiently at Yoongi's side for tidbits.

The three couples occupied the sofa while Hobi, Jimin and Jungkook sprawled on the carpet in front of the TV.

"Where's Joon and Rose?" Yoongi asked at length when he started to slow down from pushing food down his throat.

"Banging again, most likely," Lisa yawned. She had curled up next to Yoongi to watch the movie after finishing her food but her eyes kept falling shut.

"I miss my hubby already," Jennie sighed, checking her phone. "Should we call them?...But Joon wasn't so happy last time and Chaeyoung-ah was miffed too. Which doesn't happen because my hubby is never miffed with me."

"What do you mean, your hubby? What am I then?" Taehyung said indignantly. Before Jennie could reply, they heard the click of a door opening.

Taehyung's mouth suddenly quirked up into a dangerous smile, a sign that Yoongi had learned meant mischief. He watched Tae signal at Jimin and Jungkook. The latter immediately picked up his camera and followed them out.

"I better go stop them...again," Yoongi sighed as he stood up. Jin chuckled.

"They can't let them live in peace huh?"

"You're so protective," Hobi smiled.

Yoongi grunted, extricating himself from Lisa who was dozing beside him. "Rose and Namjoon have been dating for months already, when are they going to leave them alone? I just know what it's like to be teased because I've been there, and it might make Rose uncomfortable around Namjoon. They're still in a delicate phase of their relationship."

"Oh listen to gramps being so caring!" Jin cooed and Yoongi shot him a death-glare.

"You should really try to rein in Tae more," Jisoo said to Jennie, who merely shrugged.

"What? It's just some harmless fun... nothing Chaeyoung-ah can't handle."

"Aiish you're too whipped!" Jisoo said exasperatedly. "You're all like ' _yes babe this_ ' and ' _yes babe that'_ , you're too submissive when you're around Taehyung!"

"Am not! I totally top when we have sex, I'm the dom--"

Yoongi made a quick getaway, hurriedly running out of the room before he could hear more torrid details.

He spotted the maknaes lying in wait for the unsuspecting couple who seemed to be finally out of RM's studio. They were peeking furtively round the doorway that led into the corridor leading to Joon's room. Yoongi could hear the murmur of low voices, which he recognised to be Namjoon's deep drawl and Rose's sweet tone.

A few months into their break, the boys together with Jisoo, Lisa and Jennie had noticed Namjoon and Rose often disappearing into his studio for long stretches at a time.

What the couple did in there, the rest could only guess.

Taehyung, however, left little to spare for the imagination with his speculations. ( _"Oh come on, they just started dating, of course they want to experiment and release all that pent-up sexual tens-"_ , _"Thank you Taehyung, now shut the eff up, it's 3 in the morning I'm trying to sleep."_ )

Both Namjoon and Rose dodged questions and only shook their heads sheepishly when pressed for answers. They didn't even flinch when their members played the guilt card ( _"I thought it was bros before hoes, hyung"_ , _"Chaeyoung-ah we're sisters aren't we? Don't you trust us anymore?"_ )

But their eyes were always sparkling when they emerged, their faces adorned with little smiles as they laced their fingers together.

Seeing his leader look so relaxed and content made Yoongi's thoughts about their hiatus and comeback momentarily take a backseat. When a hand slipped into his, he would turn to find Lisa gazing at them as well, her expression tender and he understood she felt just as glad he did.

With Namjoon keeping a tight lip on his activities in his (soundproof) studio, it was only natural for the maknaes' taunting efforts to double. Taehyung had recruited Jimin and Jungkook in his mission to tease the living daylights out of their leader the day Rose had confessed: Namjoon's reaction to her confession was too priceless to overlook and the trio felt the need to remind him constantly.

Yoongi could not fathom what was so entertaining about this pastime, but it seemed that Taehyung found it quite hilarious that his hyungs were dating ( Yoongi had it tough in the first few months with Lisa as well. However Taehyung strangely didn't kick up such a fuss when Jin got together with Jisoo).

As for the other two boys, Yoongi was relieved they took Rose's confession in stride: they had both crushed on her in the beginning, with Jungkook being the more vocal of the two, and Yoongi had feared tensions would boil over and affect both groups. He was actually proud that his dongsaengs were mature enough to accept the situation and support their hyung, encouraging him to just be himself with her.

They were, however, unfortunately not mature enough to leave the couple alone without teasing Namjoon when they saw them together.

"Maknaes!" Yoongi hissed. Taehyung whipped his head back and gestured with a finger to his mouth.

" _Come here_ " he mouthed with a wink.

"What?" Yoongi whispered. Taehyung beckoned him.

"You're gonna wanna see this," whispered the younger boy right by his ear.

Taken over by curiosity, Yoongi switched with Taehyung and peeked round the doorway.

"GOTCHA GRANDPA!"

Yoongi was shoved out in the middle of the corridor, landing splat on his face.

"What the hell?!"

"PUT ON THE BIRTHDAY SONG!" Taehyung bellowed.

Yoongi was suddenly surrounded by his members and the girls, all singing in chorus to that dreaded song that made him cringe to death:

_Happy Birthday to you!_

_Happy Birthday to you!_

Party poppers went off and confetti rained down on them. Even Holly joined in, barking up a storm. Yoongi desperately searched for a way out, clapping both hands over his ears as his face grew hotter and hotter.

But he was completely trapped as the circle of people's legs blocked all escape routes. He glimpsed Taehyung winking at him and Jungkook filming.

And then Yoongi understood everything: it had all been a ploy to corner him.

"BRING OUT THE CAKE!" Taehyung boomed, enjoying himself immensely.

Lisa appeared with a broad grin, bearing a cake decorated with sparklers and chocolate frosting as around them the swell of voices reached a crescendo ending with a deafening applause and raucous cheering.

"You were all in on this," he accused as they laughed at his indignant face.

"You always managed to slip away like a rat the moment we mentioned your birthday, but not this time," Taehyung grinned.

Namjoon beamed, his dimples etched deep in his cheeks as he held Rose close. "You got it hyung. Sorry but no regrets."

"Betrayal. From now on, you can face the maknaes by yourself" Yoongi informed then turned to Lisa. "Et tu Brute _?"_

Lisa shrugged. "How else were we gonna get you to celebrate such an important day?"

She sat down on the floor and held out the cake to him, the sparklers lighting up the stars in her eyes as she smiled.

"Make a wish, birthday boy" she said softly.

_A wish?_

A sudden hush fell on the spectators as Yoongi stared at the fizzing sparklers and the cake, then turned his gaze up at the expectant faces, girls and boys alike smiling broadly.

These were the faces of his family.

A family he had grown to cherish dearly as the years passed.

A family that helped him grow and evolve as a person.

A family that supported each other in times of crisis.

A family that never turned its back on its members.

A family that dreamed big and worked tirelessly to make them a reality.

A family that would, hopefully, continue to grow and flourish together in the future.

_A wish..._

"Uhh, hyung might wanna blow the candles now?" Jimin called, snapping Yoongi from his thoughts.

Yoongi smiled, making up his mind. He closed his eyes and inhaled.

_I wish..._

He blew with all his might, emptying his lungs of air.

None of the sparklers were snuffed out.

"Move over gramps, lemme teach ya how it's--"

Yoongi huffed strongly and this time blew out all the sparklers, thin spires of smoke curling in the air above their heads as everyone cheered.


	7. My Wish (Part 2)

"And then I was like, do you even know where your country is on the map, mate? And the stoned guy just stared at me and was like... duuuuuuude!"

"Yeah that was a laugh!"

There was much merriment, much reminiscing in the form of entertaining stories from the boys' seemingly bottomless cache of escapades and tour stories, mostly acted out by Taehyung and Jungkook.

"Ughh, I wanna go see Blinks, but I want to stay here with you Tae-tae," Jennie sighed at one point after a particular anecdote involving Jungkook, Taehyung and Jimin's encounter with an apparently possessed, evil floor mop had their audience holding their sides, tears streaming.

Blackpink had flown to Seoul for a short break spanning just four days for Yoongi's surprise birthday celebration, before they continued with the next leg of their In Your Area Global Tour. It had taken some persuading but YG finally gave them permission to return to Seoul for the brief stopover as a reward for their hard work.

All the of the gang were on high alert, taking extra precautions with their movements around Bangtan's dorm.

The press had already found it _interesting_ that the girl group had flown back such a long distance for such a brief time in the middle of a tour.

_What is YG up to? Is there something we should know? Is there something he's hiding?_

Speculations were rife, but at least no dating rumours surfaced. Blackpink were careful and vigilant to a fault, something Yoongi had to grudgingly credit their sajangnim for.

After the uproar Bangtan had caused almost a year ago, the media had become more sceptical of idols, questioning their every move, analysing their every word and inflection, stalking them more closely than ever, dishing out poisonous rumours on practically a weekly basis to feed the increasingly rabid netizens.

So all of the gang were on high alert except for...

"Maybe I'll catch a plane to your next destination and come visit you. Where is it you're going again, Amsterdam? Ah, we could have a date there as well...and go to Vondelpark or the Anne Frank House, yeah? Or museums yeah, I wanna go to Rijksmuseum or Van Gogh musuem! And I want to take pictures of the windmills too."

Jennie smiled and nodded eagerly. "That would be fun."

"Can us single people tag along?" Jimin asked.

"Yeah maybe you could hook up with some hot chick from the Red Light District hyung," Jungkook snickered, nudging him.

"Why not? We'll ditch you sooner or later anyways, Chim" Taehyung winked, "me and Jen go one way, you go find some girls the other way. We meet up back at the airport."

"Absolutely not!" Namjoon put in sternly. Jennie and Taehyung immediately pouted in annoyance.

"I mean it" Namjoon said grimly, "Are you guys suicidal or something? No running about with girls in public, it's only a matter of time before people find out about all of us. I know things have thankfully died down but it won't stay like that forever, we can't risk being complacent. You think they're all gonna welcome us with open arms? Tae, you think ARMY will accept you're seeing Jennie? I want us to be well prepared when that happens, so nobody is hurt," his arm tightened protectively round Rose as he spoke, "and I want us to reveal our relationships on our own terms. I want to be transparent and honest with ARMY...once we're ready."

"Jeez relax hyung," Taehyung rolled his eyes," I get it you and Rosie have only been together for a short time so you're still anxious to venture out properly but mark my words, you'll get used to the thrilling aspect of secret dating, trust me on this one, I'm an expert. And I mean look at Yoongi: you could tell he's whipped for Lisa from a mile away but he's still sashaying down Gangnam with the girl by his side like it's nobody's business."

"Because it actually _is_ nobody's business" Yoongi grunted.

"My point is, you need to loosen up Joon," Taehyung persisted, "just go out and enjoy a date for heaven's sake, you won't be young forever, you know. Time's a-ticking. Are you gonna huddle up in your studio till you're old and wrinkled? Girls like to gallivant you know! They like to go places and take aesthetic photos for Insta! You guys have never been on the classic coffee shop date since _forever_. I call that downright _pitiful._ "

Namjoon paused, glancing at Rose who seemed to be particularly fascinated with her fingernails, her cheeks tinted pink. He bowed his head like a wounded dog.

"Jeez give them a break!" Yoongi growled, irritation squirming in his gut. "Not everybody's an exhibitionist like you Tae, and besides, you're the one that almost got caught by Dispatch not once, not twice, but _four times_."

"What can I say?" Taehyung shrugged as he pulled Jennie flush against his chest, "me and Jen like to live dangerously..." he gazed down at her adoringly. "Ain't that right babe? You be the Bonnie, I'll be the Clyde."

Jennie smirked and cocked a finger gun at his heart. "Hit you with that ddu-ddu-du!"

They laughed and Taehyung raised a hand in farewell. "Well, if anybody needs us, we'll be in my room okay? Joon hyung, think about what I said, you still have a chance before the girls leave for...oh yeah, that's right, _some six months._ No breaks this time, YG only caved in to Lisa because personally, I think he is Yoongi-biased."

Yoongi spluttered.

" _...._ So like...no pressure or anything." Taehyung paused, a smile curving his lips. "That reminds me....Jennie baby we have much to catch up on..."

They chortled and giggled and nudged each other on their way to Taehyung's room, making Yoongi cringe. Lisa had passed out like a light during the heated conversation: she was snoring softly like a purring cat, asleep on a pillow next to his thigh.

In the wake of the awkward silence, Jungkook jumped up and proposed some dance practice to burn off all the cake they had just consumed. Namjoon, Rose, Jisoo and Jin declined but Hobi and Jimin quickly took up the offer and the three of them left the dorm.

"Yoongi, can you come help us please?" Jin called from the kitchen, where he and Jisoo were busy washing up.

Yoongi raised an eyebrow but complied, leaving a whispering Namjoon and Rose behind with Lisa sleeping on the couch.

"I know Tae meant well...but that was a bit too... _harsh_ , for my liking" Jisoo blurted at length while washing her third plate. "You know how Joon feels about the whole dating thing--you know how long it took for him to accept that Chaeyoung likes him. He just wants to be careful after everything that happened."

"Not to mention how sensitive he is on the whole 'not getting younger' crap," Jin added with a sigh as he passed the dishcloth to Jisoo. "He already strives hard for Chaeyoung...he might start feeling pressured to do rash things to prove a point."

"Why are you guys telling me all this?"

"Have a talk with him, Yoongi," Jin pleaded. "You know Joonie better than any of us. Find out if he's really okay. Talk to Chaeyoung too while you're at it."

"Excuse me, but since when have I been the group's designated couples counsellor now?" Yoongi quizzed. "And couldn't you talk with Chaeyoung yourself, Jisoo?"

Jisoo turned away. "I did. But...she didn't really tell me anything, other than that she supports Joon's decision to not go out in public, at least for now....I think she's...worried for him."

"Why though? She should be concerned for herself, Joon can handle antis fine." Yoongi pointed out.

"That's what I'd like to know."

Yoongi exhaled. "And you think they're gonna open up to me?"

"Well...I think your situation is quite similar." Jin mused as he listed off his fingers. "You and Joon are both quite older than than your respective girlfriends... your 'ship' isn't that famous nor approved much by international ARMY and Blinks alike, again because of the so-called 'compatibility' fans look for. That alone could help the lovebirds relate to you...you could be like a mentor in a way. Lisa could of course prove invaluable in this regard: she's the closest with Chaeyoung, she could help her deal with her insecurities if there are any. Maybe she already knows something..."

"Lisa would have told me if she did...." Yoongi frowned. "Remind me why I have to do this, again?"

"Namjoon and Chaeyoung won't be seeing each other for the next few months," Jisoo said patiently, "their relationship, as you yourself pointed out, is still in a delicate phase. And of the two, I feel Namjoon is the most insecure, which I'm afraid could lead to...consequences..."

" Consequences? Like the fact that they're banging every time you girls are over?"

"Nobody said they're banging!"

"Well, Tae seems to think so" Jin pointed out as though it settled the matter.

"He doesn't know everything! Chaeyoung-ah isn't like that!" Jisoo insisted.

"Well to be fair, Namjoon could even turn guys gay for him so I wouldn't be surprised if she went against her own values just so he could get in her-"

"For the last time, Chaeyoung isn't some whore who only lusts after Joon!"Jisoo was getting worked up: she had always been protective of her dongsaengs even if it meant clashing with her boyfriend. "She genuinely cares about him! She is always wondering if he's eaten, especially with him and his writing moods! And she's always worrying if he's slept enough! Or whether he's pushing himself too much!"

"Pika-Chu, I never said she only cared about getting in bed with him," Jin returned calmly, "I'm just saying, it's only natural for attraction to blossom into something _more._ And you have to admit, them being so secretive isn't really helping to dispel our suspicions now, is it?"

Jisoo sighed. "Yeah...I wish I knew what was really going on...before they get hurt somehow..."

They were talking in such a foreboding manner, their voices hushed as though something terrible was threatening to happen, that Yoongi couldn't bear it.

"Cut it out, you guys are creeping me out!"

"I'm just saying...they need our support, now more than ever, especially with Blackpink being the centre of the world's attention" Jin said seriously, "I know we preached a lot about self-love and all that jazz before...nonetheless, being in a relationship can bring all those ugly doubts back to the surface, because of Rose, I mean they're both human, you know--"

"Hey don't blame her!" Jisoo interjected sharply.

Yoongi rolled his eyes. _Here they go again...they bicker like some old married couple already._

"I'm just...telling it as it is...Namjoon often says he never imagined someone like Rose would even spare him a glance, let alone fall for him." Jin scratched his head. "Don't you remember him saying no celebrity whatsoever lived up to his expectation of what an idol should be? Well, that changed when he got to know Chaeyoung. Don't you remember how out of depth he was around her in the beginning, when you girls started visiting the dorm? I just...don't want him to lose himself and be a whole new person in an effort to please her or something."

"That would be too cliche, even for Namjoon."

"Oh trust me, he's a sucker for the cliche--living with Yoongi for so long rubbed off on him."

Yoongi groaned and held his head, feeling a headache coming. "If you're both so concerned why don't you interrogate them yourselves? I never thought so far...I thought they were okay."

Jin exhaled in exasperation. "They _are_ okay! At least I hope they are.... But they might not be if this continues, if Tae keeps on provoking him, if Joon gets some idea in his head that unbalances the status quo he imposed on himself!"

Yoongi shrugged. "Joon isn't an idiot. He won't do anything reckless or stupid that would hurt him or others, as you're implying."

The older man clutched at his hair.

"Don't you get it? _He's in love_ for god's sake!" Jin practically screeched and Yoongi was glad he had closed the heavy kitchen door behind him, "That alone changes everything! You think _you_ haven't changed since you hooked up with Lisa? You think I'm _still_ the same person after I got with Chu here? Hell, even Tae became a 110% more hyper when he got together with Jennie!"

That made Yoongi pause.

"Yoongi, all we're asking is for you to have a little heart-to-heart chat with Namjoon and check how he and Chaeyoung are doing. Nothing more, nothing less. Just some...bro talk," Jisoo added, earning a weird glance from Yoongi and Jin.

"Jisoo I'm pretty sure 'bro talk' isn't in the dictionary" Yoongi said dryly.

After some thought, he finally let out a sigh.

Talking about relationships wasn't really his cup of tea: emotion-wise, he wasn't sure he was the best person fit to deal with such things. And besides, Joon and Rose seemed to be doing pretty much okay.

But deep down, he had to admit he also noticed Namjoon's wistful expression whenever Taehyung bragged about his latest date and showed them pictures, noting his quiet sigh and subtle glances at Rose next to him.

Or the way his voice cracked when he declined Rose's invite to join her for a quick trip to a corner store for groceries.

Or the way he turned down Taehyung's offer for a double date, Yoongi's offer for a walk in the nearby park with their girlfriends (double date #2).

Or the way his shoulders tensed when some news involving the k-pop industry, BTS, or their CEO came over on the news.

Or the way he seemed to hold Rose so carefully when they hugged, as if he was afraid she would shatter in his arms (Yoongi had even heard him raise his usually mild voice when the maknaes were boisterously chasing each other and Jungkook happened to speed past Rose, bumping into her in the progress. Although she had insisted she wasn't hurt, Namjoon glared daggers at the poor boy as the latter apologised profusely.)

_Perhaps Joon could do with a little chat after all._

"I'll see what I can do..."

>

Lisa was curled up on the couch next to him, and he was trying to focus on the programme playing on TV. They had spent a relaxing two days in each other's company, just snoozing, cuddling, eating, catching up with each other, playing with Holly, watching movies, more eating and more sleeping ("B to the O to the R-I-N-G" Taehyung booed.)

The couple were currently in the living room together with Namjoon and Rose, who were both cuddled up next to each other, with Joon stroking Rose's hair as she slept on his broad chest, beaming down on her like a radiant sun.

Looking at them, Yoongi couldn't help the fond smile taking over his face.

They had come a long way from the awkward fumbling greetings they gave each other in the beginning.

Truth be told, Rose had been shy and soft-spoken around all the boys of Bangtan, which Yoongi supposed resulted from her background of little close contact with boys. Yoongi found her shyness endearing, and he was sure the rest of his members did as well.

But surprisingly, Namjoon-- their outgoing, charismatic leader who braved ignorant foreign interviewers and addressed a UN General Assembly with only a slight tremor of the hand giving away his nervousness--Namjoon stuttered and stumbled over his words around her when the girls' presence became a more common occurrence at the boys' dorm.

He bantered with Lisa, face palmed with Jisoo when Jin caused yet another chaotic mess and earnestly discussed the ins and outs of the music industry with Jennie (Yoongi tried not to feel offended that Jennie warmed up to Namjoon quicker than she did with him.)

But with Rose, Namjoon was a tongue-tied, blushing mess. He could only manage a nod and very small talk accompanied with the most timid of smiles. According to Lisa, Chaeyoung had even expressed her concern that the lanky rapper didn't like her.

Yoongi smiled and merely reassured his girlfriend that it wasn't the case--he asked her to give the two some time to warm up to each other.

Music was what brought Namjoon and Rose closer and closer until their paths crossed and finally intertwined.

Jennie smugly claimed credit for bringing them together: she used to include Chaeyoung in her discussions with Namjoon and then gradually slip away to leave the two still talking animatedly about music. They eventually branched out to talk about their own lives, literature, favourite cities, their hobbies, likes and dislikes, their pet peeves, their pets, their favourite and least favourite foods, deep philosophical discussions....

Yoongi, quietly observant when he wasn't lavishing all of his attention on Lisa, caught encouraging signs of development between the two: stolen glances; soft smiles; quiet laughter; tentative and fleeting grazes of the hands; complimenting each other's English; Rose gazing up admiringly at the tall man when he spoke; Namjoon sliding down the couch to be level with her when she was speaking, his gaze attentive.

Namjoon was the first of the boys to ask Rose to sing for them, encouraging her when she at first shyly declined. He even went as far as to bring out an electric guitar a fan had gifted him and her eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

At first she wouldn't touch the instrument, terrified she'd break it, to which Joon heartily laughed and said he hadn't broken it yet which meant the guitar was pretty hardy. After blessing them with her angelic voice, he was the first to burst into loud applause, startling her. Rose blushed a pretty shade of magenta, hiding her face behind her hands as the rest of her audience followed suit and clapped, with Jungkook and Jimin clamouring for an encore.

It was an open secret that the two younger boys crushed on Rose--they vied for her attention like two playful puppies, with Jungkook being the more vocal of the two.

But, like a piece of iron attracted to a magnet, she gravitated inexorably towards Namjoon.

Rose gently turned down Jungkook's offer of playing with him and Taehyung on the Wii (the few times she played she had impressed them with her prowess) when she spotted Namjoon sitting by himself on the couch and instead went to sit beside the man lost in his thoughts.

She sweetly declined Jimin's invitation to sing during some karaoke nights Blackpink and BTS held in Bangtan's dorm when she noticed Joon wasn't around. Yoongi noted that more often than not, she quietly left the party to visit Joon, who was usually shut up in his room since he wasn't really keen on karaoke. ( _"Rose doesn't like seeing anybody being left out"_ Lisa commented once when she and Yoongi watched her leave the raucous living room.)

And when Blackpink came over, the first person Yoongi noticed her searching for was the tallest boy amongst them, usually standing at the back. Rose's eyes always lit up, reminding him of Lisa whenever she saw him waiting for her on their dates.

When Yoongi turned to follow Rose's gaze, he was always met by a blur that rushed passed him as the man in question eagerly went to greet the girl, taking her hand. It was quite a sight to see Namjoon towering over Rose: a gentle giant smiling bashfully down at his ethereal princess, who smiled back radiantly. Joon's dimples seemed to be permanently embedded in his cheeks when Rose was around.

They were obviously smitten with each other but neither made a move. When quizzed separately, both admitted they liked the other, but insisted it was on a platonic level.

Their respective members managed to collectively agree to let Time take its course and allow them to realise their mutual attraction by themselves (Yoongi considered this a miracle, because Taehyung had been planning a whole elaborate scheme to force the two into a confession which thankfully even Jennie shot down, disagreeing with her boyfriend's flights of fancy, for once.)

Things changed during some of the darkest moments in Bangtan's recent history.

Although they were unpleasant times that Yoongi preferred not to remember much, those days were tinged with a golden splash of pure sunlight.

*

BTS had just been stripped of their recent twelve Inkigayo crown haul because of some stupid accusations of vote-fixing.

At the time, nothing concrete had been unearthed but the news caused such an uproar amongst K-netz who accused BTS of being cheaters and usurping other groups of their deserved wins that the music industry's head authorities decided to invalidate BTS's wins on every show in that comeback period.

Namjoon rallied the boys and their fans to stay strong because justice would be served once the truth came out after investigations. _It would be sheer folly for Bangtan to try and dabble in such things,_ Joon argued, _BTS would never stoop so low just to maintain their popularity. They weren't cheaters or sore losers. BTS stood for hard work and hard-earned achievements._

Alas, Joon's moral compass did not seem to extend to the group of zealots operating just under the radar.

The indisputable truth soon emerged: BTS were indeed not involved in personally tampering with voting data, but four white hat hackers at BigHit were.

Working under the delusion that BTS must not lose their divine right to rule the charts, the investigations revealed just to what lengths these sasaengs had been willing to go.

The young men, fresh out of college, confessed to looking up to BTS as their saviours and merely wanted to do their part as gratitude for their idols. The police found blueprints and journals chronicling the group's movements, much like a cult organisation, with hierarchal structures in place, and plans to introduce new recruits to the ranks of the group as well as intensifying hacking efforts to ensure BTS were not toppled from their throne.

The hackers explained how they had discovered the flaw in the digital voting system changes implemented recently.

Using their expertise, they managed to work the flaw in their favour, corrupting the code to divert more online votes to BTS, thus ensuring a wide vote margin over other 'second-rate copy-cats who don't even deserve to be on the same show as Bangtan, because Bangtan are above everyone', according to the speaker of the group.

They also admitted to have been planning cyber attacks on other companies to bring them down from within with security leaks, leaving them vulnerable and defenceless to hackers lurking on the Dark Web. In this way, the speaker explained, other groups would be forced to disband, but BTS would rise above them all, the true gods of the generation.

Yoongi was almost physically sick when all the facts emerged. Never had he experienced betrayal of this degree: to think it had been inside people, who had been hired on a basis of being in a family, that had the audacity to commit such treachery...

His blood ran cold at the possibility of having Blackpink's relationship with them exposed, and he understood for the first time just how vulnerable and incredibly naive they had all been.

During that terrible week of self-imprisonment, Yoongi had nightmares for the first time in a long time: he dreamed that an angry mob was chasing Lisa, throwing rocks and jeering at her as she ran, crying. He always woke up with the vivid images still playing in his head, the turmoil in his mind only calming down once he saw her face to face on his phone.

Everyone was naturally horrified by all these revelations, except for Antis of course: it was just the kind of breakthrough they needed to raise their ugly voices of contempt.

The culprits were immediately fired from BigHit and mercilessly ripped to shreds online by millions of enraged ARMYs. BigHit's image also took a hit, suffering from the low blow dealt by supposedly one of their own. Stocks and shares of the company slid worryingly fast, making antis crow out even more loudly.

But that wasn't the end of the bad news: Bang PD was then hospitalised. It seemed the whole affair took its toll on his ageing body and he was found collapsed by his family in his home office.

The boys had stayed in almost all the time during that horrible week, huddled together, bewildered and dazed. The management hadn't allowed Blackpink to visit so Yoongi had to make do with Facetime calls, which still weren't enough.

When the girls finally came over, Lisa didn't even utter a single word: she crossed the room to reach Yoongi and wrapped her arms around him. He sank into her embrace, feeling relief flood his body. He had felt like a floating blob of consciousness in the days since it all started, roaming around like a mindless zombie.

He spied Taehyung and Jin in much the same position as him, with Jennie sagging beneath Tae's figure. Jisoo's face was scrunched up tightly because Jin was hugging her too hard, but she didn't say a word, only wrapping her arms round his back to pull him closer.

The single men were however huddled to the side, seemingly staring into space.

Yoongi followed their line of sight and drew a breath.

Rose was looking at Namjoon with a conflicted expression. He stared back, his eyes unusually dull.

"Joon..."

He shook his head and took a step back, turning away. "Why are you here?"

A flash of hurt crossed her face.

"I'm...I'll be okay," he managed to let out, his voice hoarse. He turned on his heel. "I'll be in my room."

"Joon..." Rose reached out to him, gently, "come here..."

"I don't need your pity!" he snarled out of the blue, swatting her arm away. He held his head. "Leave me alone, please!"

And then in a despaired whisper, but still loud enough for Yoongi ,who was standing closest, to hear: "You can't see me like this..."

Rose reached out and pulled him in a hug before he ran, hanging on tightly when he tried shrugging her off. But his attempts were weak and soon juddered to a halt.

"Rose, please..." he pleaded.

Yoongi wondered why his leader was acting so out of character. When was the last time he saw Namjoon break down like this?

By now had everyone had grown aware of the commotion and they watched with bated breath.

"No," she shook her head earnestly, "I'm not going anywhere." Her hands trailed up his face, gazing at him tenderly. "Joon, I don't want you to keep your emotions locked up. That's not what you taught your fans....what you taught the world...what you taught _me."_

 _"Rose"_ Namjoon's voice cracked.

"None of this is your fault," she whispered shakily, as though out of breath, "None. Of. It. You are not accountable for what your fans do. They are people, with their own minds and own reasons. You are not your fans..."

Yoongi's breath hitched when he saw Namjoon's eyes filling.

_Impossible._

_Had he been so wrapped up in his brooding he didn't notice his leader was hurting?_

_Had Joon really been blaming himself all this time?_

_If it came to that, were his members really okay after all?_

He glanced at the boys now and saw them in a similar state of shock at Rose's words.

_And how did Rose know?_

Yoongi felt incredibly ashamed: how could he have not noticed his leader's silence as guilt? Looking beyond all the encouraging words and reassurances he had been constantly showering his members with, Namjoon had been hurting just as much as them, if not more.

Yoongi assumed that because they had been cleared of the false implications, there was nothing to feel guilty for.

He had been so terribly off the mark.

"But I'm their idol" Namjoon swallowed. "They look up to me. If I had done the decent thing and tried to stop this ridiculous idea of us being always on top of the charts since it started--"

"--there would always be fanatics who go to extremes" she interrupted, "and you know that. There's nothing you could have done to stop them. Namjoon, you owe those kind of people _nothing._ Not your apologies, not your hard work, not your kindness, not your sweetness...nothing."

A sniff, accompanied by a nod.

"Joon..." Rose was smiling, her eyes filling as well, " you're not alone, you're never alone, okay? Your brothers are here, and the girls. And...." She hesitated before she cupped his face, gently brushing his wet cheeks with her thumbs. "...and me. You will always have me," she whispered, "so practice what you preach Kim Namjoon, and don't lock yourself up to us."

A solitary tear at first, then two. Another great sniff. Then the tears were rolling down his cheeks.

Namjoon's mouth stretched into a tiny smile, the first genuine one in ages. Yoongi wanted to cheer, because it was like the sun emerging from behind the dark clouds for the first time after a storm.

"I won't," Namjoon said gruffly and crushed Rose in a hug, lifting her up on tiptoes as she linked her arms round his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. He swayed with her in his arms, eyes pressed shut as the worry lines in his forehead melted.

Someone wolf-whistled loudly, shattering the spell.

Rose and Namjoon pulled back from each other as though electrified, their faces flushing a dull red.

From the corner of his eye, Yoongi saw Jennie whacking Tae's head.

"Namjoon?" Jimin piped up. "You okay now, hyung?"

Namjoon glanced at Rose who was bashfully avoiding everyone's gaze. But her hand clung on tightly to Namjoon's sleeve.

The tall rapper turned on Jimin and beamed. "I will be. We will be." he said confidently. "I just...forgot about speaking with you guys. It's been...quite a week."

"Indeed," Taehyung drawled, "thanks to you Rose, for helping our leader realise he doesn't have to blame himself each time something happens."

"Oh it's nothing, Tae--"

"One wonders," Taehyung interrupted, "how is it that you knew what Namjoon was going through while we, or at least I, was oblivious to his real feelings?"

Yoongi sensed a hint of jealousy in Tae's voice and couldn't help but smile.

"Oh!" Rose fiddled with her fingers, suddenly flustered. "I...I...just saw him looking sad...and...and..."

"I told her I was tired," Namjoon came to her rescue. "I talked to her last night."

"And she knew exactly what you meant by that? Nice" Taehyung drawled, savouring the revelation. He was eyeing Rose closely. "My, my, hyung, you are really lucky to have such a _good friend_ in our Rose. Seriously, the boys and I have our work cut out here trying to keep up with her."

Yoongi saw Rose's fidgeting double.

"Uh, yeah, yeah she's a good friend," Namjoon said uneasily, "I don't know what I would do without--"

"Namjoon?" Rose said in a small voice.

He turned in surprise. "Yes? What is it?"he asked softly.

She had let go of his sleeve, and locked her arms behind her as she shuffled her feet nervously. Her gaze was pinned to the floor.

"I...I...was thinking...we..."

"We?" Namjoon glanced at the rest of their friends with a puzzled expression then turned back to Rose attentively. "Yeah, we?"

Rose's throat bobbed up and down. She took a deep breath and looked directly in his eyes.

"We...couldbemorethanfriends." she gabbled in one breath then buried her face in her hands.

Namjoon peered at her in concern. "Huh? What was that? Rose?"

Lisa turned her head to giggle into Yoongi's shoulder as Yoongi also suppressed a smirk watching a clueless Namjoon standing and looking very confused when Rose refused to look at him.

"Rose I didn't quite get that--"

"Oh for heaven's sake, I just about had enough of this nonsense!" Hoseok suddenly exploded, startling everyone. He stood up and pointed at Namjoon.

"Get this, dumbass: she--"

"I like you!" Rose squeaked in panic. "Namjoon I like you!"

She clapped a hand to her mouth, her eyes widening as Namjoon stilled.

"I'm...I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed, distressed, "this isn't the proper time but...I wanted to be the one to tell you. And if you can't answer me right now it's alright I--"

"You... like...me?" Namjoon repeated slowly as if he had a hard time processing her words while pointing at himself. He shook his head in disbelief.

Shyly, she tucked light strands of hair behind her ear and nodded.

"I do. I like you. Very very much." she said sweetly, her voice low but certain.

The silence after her confession was absolute: they could hear everyone's suppressed breaths in the room and the distant gurgle of plumbing.

Yoongi, standing the closest to Namjoon, saw him stand motionless, the colour draining from his face. Without warning, Namjoon's eyelids slid shut and he swayed.

"Hyung!"

"Joon!"

"What the fudge--"

They caught him before he crashed to the ground, staggering beneath his weight as they helped him lie down on the sofa.

"Congratulations," Taehyung puffed as Rose looked on dumbfounded, "I think Namjoon is officially the most whipped out of all of us."

"He actually fainted!" Jin chortled, unable to contain his glee, "he fainted because a girl confessed to him!"

"Not any girl" Namjoon pointed out from beneath them. Everyone immediately crowded around him, fussing and laughing in relief.

Namjoon's eyes searched for Rose as she peered anxiously down at him and when he found her amongst the other concerned faces, he beamed and held out his hand.

"Not any girl," he said again as he lay back to sleep, holding her hand tightly in his fist. 


	8. My Wish (Part 3)

"Yoongi?"

He started. A shadowy figure was leaning over him. Before he could yell, long fingers cupped his cheek.

"Hey hey, it's me," Lisa said gently. "I'm gonna go help Jennie cook ok?"

He noticed the TV set was off. Namjoon and Rose were nowhere to be seen.

Yoongi groaned.

Dang it, he had fallen asleep again.

"Yah, I promise I won't burn anything, I've been learning you know," Lisa laughed, thinking he had groaned because of what she said.

"Nah it's not that babe, I just needed to talk to Joon and Rose but they probably went to bang again or whatever" he huffed, frustrated.

"Oh. Well, they'll come back later, so you can talk to them then, yeah?" She paused thoughtfully. "What did you want to talk to them about?"

"Relationship stuff." Yoongi pulled a face which made her laugh. "Jin hyung and Jisoo ordered me to."

"Oh come on, you should be flattered, you're practically an expert by now." she teased then kissed his cheek, ruffling his hair. "I walked Holly earlier okay? So you can sleep again."

"Why didn't you wake me up?" he asked, miffed.

She shook her head fondly as she straightened, giving Yoongi the full view of her slender dancer's body. "I didn't have the heart to wake you up, you're too cute when you're sleeping, a perfect model. Catch you later... _oppa_." she winked and skipped to the kitchen.

"Aiiish," he chuckled. She had this way of calling him oppa that he knew he was never gonna grow tired of, not even when he hit seventy.

>

"Is this a bad time to be calling?" Yoongi leaned forward in his seat.

"Never a bad time for you, _grandpa_ ," grinned the chubby faced older man, his eyes twinkling behind his spectacles. He turned to mark a notch in a chart by the bedside table, looking very pleased with himself.

Yoongi groaned. "Not you too, Bang."

His CEO chuckled. "Taehyung said he'd send me a year's supply of my favourite snacks if I kept it up with that moniker."

Yoongi snorted. "I'll send you a _lifetime's_ supply if you don't, dang it!"

Bang laughed again. "Sorry, but a deal's a deal. So...how are you and the boys since you called...two days ago?"

The younger shrugged. "Oh we're good I guess. Blackpink came over for a break as you know, and they've been hanging out at our dorm for the past two days, they're flying out again the day after tomorrow."

"That's nice. I hope you're taking all the precautions--"

"Don't worry, it's just the usual staff that hang around the dorm, we got it all under control."

"I meant bedroom precautions as well--"

Yoongi choked and quickly changed the topic. "So uh...how are you Bang-nim?"

He observed the older man who shrugged.

The CEO looked decidedly better after that nasty heart attack: his face, which had sagged after weeks in the hospital, was finally filling out and his colour was returning. A faint pink scar on his temple was the only remaining token of that harrowing episode. The sparkle in his eyes had returned as well. He looked quite relaxed as he sat in the white hospital bed in his nightgown.

"Been better, obviously, but we're getting there. I can't wait to get back to work properly and thrash the antis!" Bang smiled. " I'm guessing you didn't call this late in the afternoon just because you're missing me?"

Yoongi chuckled wryly. "I was wondering if you could...give me some...couple advice? Like tips and punters?"

"For you and Lalisa?" Bang looked surprised.

"No...it's...Namjoon and Chaeyoung." Yoongi paused before picking up again, trying to word his sentence carefully. "Nothing seems to be wrong, but Jin and Jisoo want me to have a talk with them...they think it would benefit them."

"Oh?"

"Yeah...they think Joon and Rose could relate to me and Lisa in a way."

"Hmm...and what led to this...ahh, scenario of you discussing their private issues?"

Yoongi rubbed his chin. "Well, a number of things, I would say. I think Namjoon is still holding back in the relationship because he's scared and extremely protective of Rose."

"Anyone would be, she looks so fragile," Bang nodded.

"But that's the point," Yoongi argued, "Chaeyoung is not just a doll. I know that for a fact. She's strong and smart and can stand up for herself. Namjoon is only being suffocating while she, for now at least, is going along with his wishes."

"You're making it sound like he keeps her cooped up in a cage."

"He's keeping _both of them_ cooped up in a cage." Yoongi corrected. "He's really scared, Bang, he doesn't even go with her outside for fear of her being attacked by antis if they're seen. Taehyung is always taunting him. Jin is worried both Namjoon and Rose might hit a breaking point and end up hurt in some way or another."

"This sounds more serious than a drama," Bang mused. "So...you want my take on this?"

"I guess? I don't know what I'm supposed to talk about exactly."

"Well, you spent time with Joon the longest so you know how he thinks."

Yoongi shook his head. "He's changed a bit. He's a lot more secretive now....they both go in his studio for hours on end and never say what they're doing. Tae thinks they're...doing stuff."

Bang was shaking his head fondly. "Ahh, weren't you a little like that, Yoongi? Don't you remember how coy and sparse with details you had been after your first few dates with Lalisa? How is my beautiful daughter-in-law by the way?"

"If Tae hears you, he might not send you those snacks after all," Yoongi grinned.

"How is my beautiful _breakdancing_ daughter-in-law by the way?" Bang amended.

"She's good. We haven't been out much either, just sleeping in."

"You found the perfect match."

"I must say I have," Yoongi smirked and Bang chuckled.

Yoongi felt at ease talking to his sajangnim as their conversation deepened. He had gotten the idea of discussing his upcoming task with the CEO because the older man had always been open to help him with relationship problems, like a father.

"....well, I think the best thing to do is to straight out tell him your concerns and let him hear his side of the matter, without pushing him. Rose is his first girlfriend in a long, long time, and I am aware he is very much in awe of her so perhaps, he's scared of messing up and also trying to be the guardian of the relationship. And as you yourself pointed out, they are still very much inexperienced, still building foundations. Helping them ironing out any insecurities will surely help them be more mature about things." Bang concluded.

Yoongi nodded, mulling it over. "I think I can work with that. Thanks a lot, Bang-nim."

"Of course, _grandpa_ ," Bang smiled and ended the video call.

>

"Hey Joon, are you free at the moment?"

Namjoon glanced up at Yoongi. "Sure, come in, hyung." He sat up on the bed. "What's up?"

"Nothing much, just your hyung checking up on ya," Yoongi said gruffly as he sat on Joon's squeaky swivel chair and started spinning.

"Hey stop it, you're gonna make me dizzy," Namjoon laughed, "now out with it: what do you want to talk to me about it?"

Yoongi stopped abruptly. "Is it that obvious?"

"Well, you're frowning, which is what you do just before you dive into some serious conversation."

"Huh, you read me well."

"Yeah now stop stalling: what's on your mind?"

"You and Chaeyoung," Yoongi blurted out.

Namjoon blinked. Whatever it was that he was expecting Yoongi to talk about, his relationship was definitely not on the list.

"Oh..."

"Yeah..."

"What about us?" Namjoon asked cautiously.

Yoongi shrugged. "Is there anything you wanna talk about with me? I could help or something."

_You idiot, Min, you gotta play it more subtle!_

"I mean, Tae was being pretty vicious recently so I wanna know if you and Chaeyoung are really okay or not, in which case I'll have a little chat with him...and possibly hide his precious Gucci spring-summer 2016 collection."

"Ah haha," Namjoon laughed uncertainly at his hyung's impassive face," that's uh...a little unnecessary?"

"Are you and Rose ok?" Yoongi said solemnly, prodding at his dongsaeng's foot. "Is there anything bothering you guys at all?"

"We're quite fine, hyung, thank you for asking," Namjoon said firmly, with a tone of finality.

"Yeah? Then why do you disappear in your studio for hours on end? Are you guys hiding from us or something? Hiding from Taehyung because he's always teasing?" Yoongi was growing slightly agitated when Namjoon's face remained as blank as a whiteboard. Things weren't going to plan and he didn't know how he was going to broach the topic from another angle.

"We aren't hiding hyung. We're just...doing things."Namjoon muttered.

"Yeah? Like banging? Is the sex really that great?" Yoongi persisted, throwing caution to the wind.

Namjoon's eyes grew round. "Hyung! You actually...you guys actually thought that?"

"Don't blame me, Tae was the one who said it first!"Yoongi protested. "And you were always so secretive, what else could you possibly be doing? Watching porn together?"

Namjoon held his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking.

Yoongi cursed inwardly.

_Had he set Namjoon off? What was going on?_

"You guys are...unbelievable...." Namjoon chortled as he raised his face, laughing. The dimples were etched deep in his cheeks.

Yoongi felt stupid but he barged on. "Well, what are you doing in there then?"

Namjoon shook his head, smirking. "Why is it so important you know?"

He didn't remember his dongsaeng being this infuriating. Curiosity was slowly taking over his system and Yoongi was growing more impatient by the minute.

"Because we're worried about you, damn it!" he burst, "we're worried because you guys are not experiencing a normal, healthy relationship out in the open like me and Tae and Jin have. You're always stuck in here like a dungeon just because you're being over-protective!"

He heaved, panting to catch his breath as Namjoon eyed him in silence.

"We're not having sex," he said at last, "firstly, hyung, she's a devout Roman Catholic, and they believe sex is a precious gift, something only husband and wife should have after marriage as a coronation of their love for each other."

Yoongi's mouth dropped. "But--"

"Yes, I'm an atheist," Namjoon explained patiently, "but I respect her and will wait until then."

"Secondly...we're doing fine. She understands my fears and also wants to take it slow. Believe me, I want to tell the whole world that Park Chaeyoung is my girlfriend and that I'm the luckiest man alive to be with her. But..."

"But?" Yoongi probed.

Namjoon shifted on his bed. "I'm scared for her hyung. Once the fans get to know we're together...they will attack her."

"She's a strong woman, Joon. You're undermining her resilience."

"I want to protect her," Namjoon said stubbornly, "I don't want her to be exposed to Antis that could hurt her. They can attack me all they like...but not my Chaeyoung."

"Joon that's admirable...but impractical," Yoongi said quietly, "she's not a fragile butterfly that you keep in a bubble...she will want to stretch her wings and fly."

"I'm trying to delay that moment as long as I can. Hyung, can't you understand that?" Namjoon gripped on Yoongi's arm. "Don't you feel that way about Lisa? I heard you talking in your sleep sometimes: you were always muttering about protecting her. So don't tell me what to do!"

"Namjoon..."

"Hyung, I know what I'm doing. We...we just have to wait a little longer..." Namjoon sighed heavily before reaching under his pillow and pulling out a vintage music cassette tape.

"Here," he grunted and pushed it into Yoongi's hands.

"What's this?" Yoongi asked turning it over in his hand. It looked quite new. He noticed the take-up reel on the right was almost full, meaning it had been played quite recently.

The cassette tape had a title scribbled on it with a black marker: **_Rec Mensa_**

" _Mensa_ is mind in Latin, I think," Yoongi's brow furrowed, "as for Rec....rec....record?"

Namjoon nodded. "I'm not entirely sure about the Latin conjunctions but I suppose this title works for its English translation: _**Record of Mind**_."

"Hmm...and you're showing me this because...?"

"Why don't you have a listen to it?" Namjoon suggested pulling out a battered cassette player from a drawer.

Yoongi was intrigued: his dongsaeng had never mentioned this interest in vintage audio analogue products before.

"Chaeyoung loves listening to LP's," Namjoon said by way of explanation, as though he read Yoongi's mind. He slipped the cassette into the cassette player and snapped the lid shut. "She introduced me to the 80's music culture. And we watched that American movie Guardians of the Galaxy? The hero likes to play music on mixtapes like this one, he called the collection Awesome Mix Vol 1. The mixtapes are cool, and I kind of have started collecting some."

He pressed some buttons as he spoke, and the spools of tape in the cassette started whirring.

"Here, listen through the headphones," and they shared an earbud each.

Yoongi started when he heard RM's voice, rapping to lyrics he had never heard before, his tone low, flow smooth.

When the song finished, Yoongi was about to open his mouth but Namjoon signalled him to keep silent.

And then Yoongi heard it: a low melodious, familiar voice gracing his ears and making goosebumps rise all over his body.

" _You collaborated with Rose?"_

Namjoon didn't say anything until the song finished then carefully plucked out the earbud from his ear and took Yoongi's as well and set them aside.

" _Rec Mensa_ will be my next mixtape," he began, "I want to release it either ahead of our comeback, prior to it, or alongside the comeback. I don't care if it sells," he added, "but I want to accomplish two things with this collection: announce that yes I collaborated with Rose because she has the most beautiful voice and is my choice artist for a collaboration, and also yes, she's my girlfriend and I love her, so deal with it."

"And the second?" Yoongi was smiling now.

"As its name suggests, Record of Mind is a record of all the thoughts in my head,"Namjoon went on, "while I'm still around, I want to leave a record of all the things I deem important enough to be addressed: happiness, love, insecurity, loneliness, the trappings of fame, society's superfluous connections...and other issues...."

Namjoon beamed. "Chaeyoung really helped: she wrote lyrics for her parts and even put in chords. We're still recording and choosing what's going into the mixtape but I couldn't resist putting together a demo. My mom knew a guy who knows how to convert CD to cassette and well...here it is, the rudimentary version."

"Your baby, in a way," Yoongi said and Namjoon nodded enthusiastically.

"Exactly!"He laughed before falling quiet. "Rose and I wanted to do this to surprise you guys and also as a present for Bang. I wanted to show him that despite what happened, I'm staying true to myself and to what I am and what I want." He held the mixtape up. "Once I release this, there's no going back. I'm preparing for the aftermath once it's dropped."

Yoongi smirked. "Like the fact that YG will skin you alive for not taking his permission to collaborate with his treasure?"

Namjoon's mouth dropped. "Oh sh--"

"Joonie?" Rose peeked around the door. "Oh hey Yoongi."

"Hi, we had just finished talking, I'll be going now."

"No no it's ok I only stopped by to get my book. I gotta pack for tomorrow." she explained.

Namjoon leaned over and handed her the novel sitting on his desk. She said a quick thanks with a big smile and disappeared again.

Yoongi exhaled. He was quite relieved after talking with Namjoon but still felt something was not quite right between the two....

"We argued, last night, when you and Lisa fell asleep in front of the TV." Namjoon said suddenly. He looked thoughtful.

Yoongi felt his gut squirming.

"And...?"

"It's nothing serious," Namjoon chuckled, "but she's still upset with me."

He sighed. "I don't know how to make it up to her."

"What did you argue about?" Yoongi just had to ask, apprehensive about the answer.

Namjoon sighed again. "Whether pineapple on pizza should still be presented on menus."

"WHAT"

"Yeah, she's pretty stubborn on that," Namjoon chuckled. "But honestly, should it even be considered a food at all? I mean think about it, it's such a chaotic concept. You're mixing together a tropical fruit with an intrinsically Mediterranean staple food: the concept of such a fusion is really not that--"

"Why don't you take the opportunity to treat her?" Yoongi said loudly over Namjoon's rambling. "And hear me out just this once: you'll be killing two birds with one stone. You'll be treating her out to a proper date, making it up to her AND sending her off on the tour in high spirits until you see each other again."

Namjoon was about to shake his head but Yoongi stopped him again, hurriedly pressing on with his argument.

"Joon, you're stubborn too but I'm afraid Tae is right on this one. The girls are going to be away for some time. Do something memorable for her. Just this once. She...you and her both deserve something like going on a date...." Yoongi suddenly brightened. "That's it! We could ask Jin's brother to reserve a special area just to host you two in his restaurant! You'd have all the privacy you ever need."

Namjoon actually looked interested now, but Yoongi could still see doubts lingering in his eyes as he glanced at the door.

"Namjoon, if you don't take these baby steps, you won't be able to handle the big reveal," Yoongi said softly. "Go for it. You don't have much time."

"I just want to keep her safe for a little longer hyung..." the younger said sadly, "people are so cruel...even people from her own fandom attack her when all she's ever done was be the most angelic human being."

"So you're just gonna keep yourselves locked up from the world? That won't do," Yoongi said firmly, "listen, I was scared too at first. But Lisa showed me she's willing to stand by me through the whole storm we're gonna face once people find out about us. I'm certain Rose feels the same about you. So just trust her more and take a risk: disguise yourself well and take all the precautions. But on top of that...go have some fun."

He waited as Namjoon sat deep in thought, mulling over Yoongi's words. The older could practically see the cogs and gears turning in the younger's head.

"I'll do it," Namjoon said suddenly. His eyes shone fiercely. "Tell Jin to phone his brother, and I need Jimin and Hobi here ASAP to see what I'm gonna dress."

Yoongi grinned. "Leave it to me. Go get your girl."

>

"Now that we're all gathered here, we must celebrate this momentous occasion!" Taehyung intoned, "ladies and gentleman: Namjoon has finally gone out on a date, and with the veritable Park Chaeyoung aka our Rosie, no less!"

"Cheers to Namjoon and Rose!" Jimin said cheerfully holding up his champagne flute. The others followed suit, clinking glasses and laughing.

"Cheers!"

"Cheers to them!"

"I'm happy for Chaeyoungie," Lisa smiled, "she has been so patient and respectful."

"He probably kept her happy by giving it to her in the studio--"

"Taehyung!"

"What?!"

Yoongi hid a smirk. He had decided not to spill Namjoon's secret out of respect for his dongsaeng's initial idea of surprising them all with his collab.

Namjoon and Rose had already been out for two hours and were probably heading back to Bangtan's dorm by now.

"Do you think he's finally relaxing? Maybe when the girls come back from the tour, they could go on nice little picnic dates. Joon was so uptight about going out..."

"Well you can't blame him, he knows all eyes are on us now more than ever before--"

Lisa's phone buzzed. Still laughing, she took it out and checked the caller ID.

"Oh it's Chaeyoungie!" she said brightly. She took the call and put it on speaker. "Hey girl! You're on speaker, how's it going?"

"Lis...." Chaeyoung breathed, her voice crackling, "Lis... _they caught us_."


	9. My Wish (Part 4)

"Lis... _they caught us._ "

Silence in the living room, except for Chaeyoung's ragged breaths over the line.

"Wh-what?" Lisa said stupidly.

"We...were walking..." Chaeyoung mumbled, "and I think some fan and her friends recognised Namjoon, they called his name. We ran away and got rather lost. Joon lost his phone--"

Yoongi, Hobi, Tae, Jimin, Jin and Jungkook snorted in unison.

"-- but we still managed to call Joon's driver with my phone. But then...well we're currently pressed up against the wall...Joon is shielding me with his body because well um...the cameras found us. They're everywhere, guys...we're surrounded."

"Look!" Jennie had been scrolling up Dispatch's social media and immediately in the breaking news section she found a clip. The others crowded around her as Lisa urgently talked with Chaeyoung, telling her to keep her head down no matter what.

The clip was barely a minute long but it was enough: Namjoon stood pushing on a wall with his broad back to the cameras, head down, as though he was awaiting a lashing. The camera moved, jostled by other reporters as agitated shouts filled the air. A new cut showed the tall rapper from the side, face hidden by a black face mask and a person clinging to him, slightly hidden by his long billowing coat. Her long legs were the only things partially visible aside from strands of stray hair blowing in the breeze.

And as Chaeyoung said, they were completely surrounded: Yoongi watched in dismay as the reporters grew bolder and edged in closer to the couple, like vultures homing in on their dinner.

At intervals, Namjoon raised his head, yelling at the reporters to back off but they didn't really listen to him.

"Shit" Taehyung said, holding his head. " _Shit."_

"Where's the staff?" Jin said in panic. "Where are they?!"

"Someone call Bang!"

"We have to go get them!" Jennie cried, jumping to her feet and heading for the door. Taehyung caught her from the wrist.

"Baby, I love you very much, but are you nuts?"

"Tae, they're out there, alone! We have to do something!" Jennie was shaking like a leaf in a gale and Taehyung caught her up in a tight embrace.

"Tae please, we--"

"Just this once, baby," Taehyung said sorrowfully, "just this once, I have to refuse you. There's...nothing we can do."

Jisoo and Jin looked similarly helpless, phones in hand as they tried to reach the two CEO's.

Yoongi felt Lisa stand behind him and turned.

She already had their face masks in hand. Wordlessly she held it out to him and he took it, covering his face.

"Uh hyung? Lisa? What are you--"

"Distraction," Yoongi said shortly.

"We're going to be the bait," Lisa added, just as shortly.

And they ran out.

>

"Let's stop here, we're pretty close to their last reported location," Lisa muttered and pulled her cap lower over bangs. She leaned forward to instruct the cab driver and they got out, taking off at a jogging pace into an alley.

"I just hope Namjoon can hold out for a little longer," Yoongi said, scrolling through his phone for updates when they stopped every now and then.

During their drive towards the location shown in the clip, updates informed them that Namjoon and the mysterious female person with him had suddenly broken through the line of reporters and made a run for it. The action had been so sudden and swift that the reporters hadn't managed to snap a good picture of them.

Yoongi and Lisa were constantly refreshing their social media for updates about Namjoon and Rose's whereabouts.

Their plan was to protect their friends by briefly appearing and distracting the reporters and then making a speedy getaway before they could take a closer look. They hoped the distraction would work long enough for Namjoon to escape with Rose.

Then if worse came to worse, both Yoongi and Lisa had agreed they would reveal themselves, shifting the attention away from Namjoon and Rose.

They had talked about this scenario many times in the past at night, before they fell asleep. Having spent the most time in a relationship out of the rest of their members, Yoongi and Lisa felt a responsibility to look after the rest of them when it came to relationships.

They were ready to sacrifice the comfortable privacy they had enjoyed for so long for the sake of protecting their friends, if needs be.

"Says here they're quite close," Lisa said as she peered at her phone in the gloomy alley, "if we run two more blocks, I bet we can find them before my battery runs out."

"I told you to charge it once it hits 10%." Yoongi shook his head and rejected Jin's tenth call. "Any luck with Chaeyoung?"

"She's not picking up," Lisa frowned. She shrugged and pocketed her phone, blowing on her fingers before pulling her mask up again. "Shall we?"

He pulled the beanie low over his brow. "Ladies first."

They emerged from the shadows and took off.

They kept up well with each other: although Lisa had long legs, Yoongi was a speedy runner and they kept a steady pace.

"Lali, can I just say something?" He puffed as they stopped briefly to hide behind a wall next to dingy dustbins and angry graffiti decorating the bland surroundings.

"Hold that thought," she panted, peering out from round the corner, "there's our lovebirds."

Yoongi followed her pointer finger and sure enough there was Namjoon's unmistakable lanky figure, hiding somebody behind him as he faced the flashing cameras. They were pressed up against yet another wall, trapped.

"I don't think Plan A is gonna cut it," Lisa mused, chewing on her lip. Her voice was tense but her gaze was steely when she glanced back at Yoongi.

"We're really doing this huh?" She tried to smile, tried to steady her trembling hand that went up to Yoongi's cap sitting on her head and removed it. Golden, tawny locks of hair tumbled down past her shoulders.

Yoongi thought she never looked more beautiful and brave. Even though it was March, and the weather was quite nippy, she was wearing just a green flannel shirt over a t-shirt and cargo pants. She looked just as gorgeous as the moment he first laid eyes on her. He wanted to commit her image to memory, just before they took the leap into the unknown.

"Lali, do you remember my birthday, three days ago?

She raised an eyebrow.

"Uhh... what about it?"

"You guys gave me a cake and sang that stupid song and then I had to make a wish?"

"....yeah?"

"Want to know what I wished?" Yoongi stepped closer.

"You're not supposed to say, otherwise it won't come true" Lisa told him when he was in front of her.

He slipped a hand round her waist. "You know I don't believe in those childish superstitions. You either make things happen, or you don't."

"Yoongi, this isn't the right time--"

"Please, just listen," he said earnestly, "my wish...was that me and you...we stayed together. I wished for everyone to stay together too. As a family. That's my wish...that I get to keep you all as my family and we'll grow old together and face the world together."

"Oh..." Lisa whispered, her eyes round.

He connected their foreheads. "Today, what we're about to do...it will change things. But...no matter what happens, I'm hanging on to you. I'm never letting you go. Lisa, you're my family and I love you to pieces, with all that I have."

"Yoongi..."Lisa leaned into his embrace, overwhelmed. He heard her whisper back next to his ear, soft and certain: _I love you too._

He bent down to press a quick kiss on her lips. "Okay, let's get going."

She took his hand. "Together."

He grinned. "Together."

>

Hand in hand, they stepped out of their hiding place and strolled over to the crowd.

But before Lisa could holler to grab their attention, the person with Namjoon suddenly stepped out from behind him and ripped her mask off.

The crowd gasped, the cameras flashing crazily.

Rose held Namjoon's hand, lifting it up for everybody to see.

"My name is Park Chaeyoung.... Rose of Blackpink," Rose said, her voice ringing clear and strong over the hubbub of the crowd, "and I'm in a relationship with my boyfriend, Kim Namjoon of BTS."

That sent the crowd in a frenzy as they surged forward to interrogate the couple.

But Namjoon moved quicker, stepping in front of Rose and staring down the reporters with a stern gaze.

"Well there you have it," Namjoon said at last and incredibly, a smile broke over his face. He slipped an arm round Rose's shoulder and even turned to press a kiss on the top of her head.

"I only ask that you respect our feelings and our privacy. We have been waiting to share this incredible news with you, with the release of a new mixtape that we're currently both working on but circumstances notwithstanding, we are officially revealing the nature of our relationship today..."

Namjoon smiled as the crowd started murmuring, the volume increasing rapidly. He stepped aside to reveal Rose again, interlacing their fingers together.

"Namjoon and I understand that many people won't be happy with us dating," Rose said. Yoongi marvelled at how the crowd fell silent to listen except for the incessant cameras flashing. He glanced at Lisa who was watching with her jaw hanging.

"We understand...and we apologise," Rose smiled unapologetically, "but we're not going back on our decision just because of what people think. My Blinks, I'm sorry if you're disappointed, but I'm in love with my Joon." She leaned against him, serene. "He makes me happy and comfortable and supports me a lot. I'm not giving up on him just because people will be against our relationship...oh and yes, Yang-sajangnim approves of him," she finished with a chuckle.

Next to her, Namjoon's chest was puffed up with pride as he gazed at her adoringly.

"The same goes for me," he said, his sonorous voice making the crowd hush up, "ARMY, all I ask is for you to respect this remarkable woman standing next to me. She is very dear to me and I love her. I have nothing to apologise just for loving her: she is my anchor, my beacon of light, my..."

Yoongi could have sworn Namjoon's eyes singled him out from amongst the other people in the crowd. He saw the younger man's lips quirk before finishing his sentence.

" _My star,_ " Namjoon concluded.

The reporters were going crazy after the couple's address, shouting questions and yelling at them to turn _this way_ and _that way_ and _over here_ and--

"Yoongi, they're not gonna get out of here alive," Lisa muttered, eyeing a sizeable swathe of shrieking fangirls losing their minds just behind the rows of reporters onsite.

Yoongi huffed in frustration. _Where had the staff possibly gone?_

"Let's go in as well," Lisa said abruptly.

He glanced at her. "You're sure?"

She shrugged. "Might as well, huh? They were so brave...we can't be cowards about this...we knew this day would come eventually."

But Yoongi wanted to be sure and took both of her hands. "We can always wait a few more days if you need--"

"Right now is perfect ," she smiled, before pushing forward with Yoongi hot on her trail.

They broke through the ranks to make it next to a surprised Namjoon and Rose.

"Lisa!"

"Hyung? Why did you come out here?"

Lisa and Chaeyoung hugged each other while Yoongi merely bumped Namjoon's shoulder with his fist.

"I'm proud of you," Yoongi said gruffly.

Namjoon blinked and spared a glance at the crowd which was going berserk with the additional revelation of the new couple.

"But...what are you doing here?" he asked again.

"Because we're a family," Yoongi replied and slipped a hand around Lisa as they stood next to Namjoon. "And family sticks together."

"S'CUSE ME! OW! COMING THROUGH! Oh hey nice tie, but it's not Gucci. OUCH! OW! SORRY!"

Yoongi recognised that deep voice and immediately sought its source. He couldn't help grinning when he saw Taehyung powering through the sea of people jostling each other.

"I brought reinforcements!" Taehung announced as bodyguards surrounded them and pushed the crowd back to give the couples some much needed breathing space.

"Jennie unnie?" Lisa and Chaeyoung exclaimed in disbelief. Jennie engulfed them both in a hug.

"Jisoo and Jin are here too--"

"Sorry we're late to the party," Jisoo called as they joined the group with the rest of the boys.

The girls pulled her into their hug, laughing and crying (Yoongi wasn't sure why they were crying. Girls...)

"Tae, why did you guys come here?"

"Same as Yoongi: we couldn't just let you face them alone dude." Taehyung scratched his head. "I realised...I called you a coward so many times but I was chickening out when push came to shove."

"You overcame it though," Yoongi pointed out. Taehyung nodded gratefully.

"I was scared for Jennie too," he admitted, "she's tough, yet fragile on the inside. But if anybody dares hurt her... I'll just have to kill them, won't I?"

Jin laughed as he turned and waved to the crowd, blowing kisses. "Well as for me and Soo, we decided we should take some action for once, instead of sitting back and leaving others to do the work. I must admit this is almost as thrilling as the time Jisoo showed me this _amazing_ set of black lacy lingerie--."

"And me and the maknaes are here for the support!" Hoseok interrupted loudly. Namjoon smiled at them all, his eyes shining.

"We're a family, hyung," Jungkook piped up, "we'll always face the world together, no matter what comes our way."

"Sounds good to me," Jimin agreed with a grin, "but should we do something before our poor bodyguards are trampled in the stampede?"

"Sejin said they're on their way with the van, we just have to hold out a little while longer."

The girls had finally finished hugging it out and came to stand next to their boyfriends. Lisa slipped a hand in Yoongi's. He squinted at her through the blinding flashes, black spots dotting his vision.

"What are you up to?"

He knew that sultry smirk she was giving him, and he could almost guess what she was going to say.

"Well now that we've come this far," she purred slowly, "might as well go all the way and give them what they came here for."

"Which is?"

She could be such a tease sometimes, a world apart from the innocent Lalisa everybody else knew. Lisa sidled up close to him, smiling as people screamed when her hands draped casually round his shoulders.

"Kiss me?" she said, tilting her head, "oppa?"

"How can I say no to that?" he smirked before pulling her closer from her waist and pressing his lips to her soft ones.

If the crowd was wild before, they went absolutely crazy now.

"Hey, we can't have the old man upstaging us!" Yoongi heard Taehyung exclaim, "Jennie babe, let's show them how it's done!"

Louder screams had Yoongi breaking their intimate moment in time to see Taehyung sweep Jennie off her feet and kiss her full on the mouth as her fingers dug into his hair.

Jimin and Jungkook whooped at the top of their lungs to drown out the roaring audience behind them and Hobi clapped his hands raw.

Yoongi thought that by now the whole world probably knew about them. He could just imagine the headlines: "BTS-Blackpink: Rise of the Superstar Power Couples."

"Well, me and Jisoo have nothing to prove to these peasants and--mpffmpfff!" Jin was cut off when Jisoo pulled him down from his shirt and their lips smashed together. He relented without much force, actually responding to Jisoo's kiss with so much enthusiasm he lifted her right off her feet.

"Joonie go!" Hobi encouraged. "This is your time to shine! Come on!"

"Yeah let them know she's your girl hyung! No guy will dare lay his eyes on her again!"

"Namjoon and Rose are sitting in a tree!" Taehyung chanted, joined by Jennie, "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

"Real mature guys," Yoongi muttered and he glanced anxiously over at his leader who was standing bashfully next to a similarly shy Rose. She was hiding her face behind her fingers, with only her eyes visible.

"Chaeyoung?"

She turned towards Namjoon, like a sunflower turns towards the sun. Her cheeks were dusted an endearing shade of pink. But her smile, oh Yoongi knew that smile: it was reserved for one man, and one man only: the same man standing in front of her.

Yoongi realised that this was the couple's very first public moment, in front of their own members even: Joon and Rose had always been far more reserved than, say, Taehyung and Jennie.

He didn't remember ever seeing them kissing. _Was this all moving too fast for them?_

Yoongi took a step forward but Lisa held him back from interfering.

"But they're not ready!" he protested anxiously, "they only just went out on a date and now the whole damn world knows and they're being pressured--"

"Look" she smiled.

Yoongi looked.

Namjoon was cupping Chaeyoung's face, his eyes locked with hers as his head slowly bent to meet her tilted face. Their eyes closed simultaneously when their lips finally met in the most gentle, tender kiss Yoongi had ever witnessed. Namjoon's hands slid down the small of her back, pulling her flush against his chest as their kiss deepened and Chaeyoung's fingers trailed up his sideburns.

They would all be trending on Twitter in just a few minutes, Yoongi could just visualise the chaos taking over and he grinned at the thought.

_Total anarchy--he loved it._

"Well dayum, hyung's getting it tonight," Taehyung muttered as Namjoon and Rose's grips on each other tightened and they swayed.

Yoongi spotted BigHit's black van finally drawing up and signalled to the others, who all heaved a sigh of relief: the crowd was getting too much to handle.

"Joon, we gotta move!" he called hesitantly when he saw no sign of slowing down from the couple making out in front of him.

"Well, that's all folks!"Hobi called cheerily when the boy and girl finally pulled apart, gasping for air, "And don't be so sad, ladies and gents: these two handsome lads and I are still very much single and ready to mingle!"

"Also I'm the manliest of them all!" Jungkook smirked, flexing his muscles.

"Heck no, you still drink your banana milk every morning and knock yourself out after two glasses of beer!"

"Jimin hyung!" Jungkook groaned as his friends laughed.

More bodyguards surrounded them and escorted the whole group into the van. They all tumbled in, giggling like kids who just stole candy from the store and were making a quick getaway.

>

"Well, safe to say, we broke the internet just now," Jimin grinned as they drove towards BigHit, leaving the crowds behind. "Well done to us!"

"Antis will be livid," Namjoon chuckled, garnering everyone's surprise at his relaxed demeanour.

He raised an eyebrow at them. "What?"

Yoongi smiled. "A date and some PDA was all it took for all the worries to wash away?"

The other boys snickered and nudged each other but Namjoon shrugged and cuddled up with Rose in his seat. The girl was already leaning against his chest, face mask back on as her eyes shut tiredly.

Yoongi smiled and hugged Lisa closer as well.

"Oh shippers are going crazy too" Jennie put in, scrolling through Naver. "Haha, they're the most happy with the visual couple: Jinsoo, congrats you two!"

"Eh what can I say? We were just meant to be," Jin smiled airily as Jisoo snuggled against him. "That'll teach that Jinyoung to stay in his place while I'm away."

"Yeah, or that Hanbin giving eyes at my girl--"

"Tae I told you, he never even talks to me--"

"I wonder if Yang will call us to his office now?" Jisoo wondered out loud. "If anybody gets his message, remember what Seungri said: drink water and remember to pace your breathing."

"The more important question is if we'll still get to continue our tour now?" Lisa said soberly. "I hope sajangnim won't chicken out."

"Maybe he'll postpone it?" Hoseok suggested.

"Yeah whatever," Jennie and Lisa yawned in unison.

Jisoo smirked. "Lisa was really about to jump Yoongi out there, I saw her face."

"Oh look who's talking, you weren't so far from doing the same yourself, unnie," Lisa retorted sluggishly and the others laughed when Jisoo merely shrugged and settled in her seat next to Jin.

"Well, I'll be having some shut-eye so shut up, okay?" Taehyung announced, pulling down a pair of shades over his eyes.

The rest agreed it was a good idea to catch up on some sleep since they had around another hour to reach BigHit. Sleep was a precious commodity that shouldn't be wasted.

"Ah, I'm getting old, all that running and excitement has me drained" Lisa complained. "I wanted to practice some dancing," she added with a pout.

Yoongi patted her head soothingly. "Don't worry, you're amazing babe. Just one day of missed practice won't be the end of the world."

And like magic, her pout disappeared to be replaced with her bright smile.

"I'm tired too. Snacks and chill tonight?" he suggested. She burrowed her head against his chest.

"Sounds perfect, grandpa."

" _Oh for the love of_ \--"

"WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT SHUTTING UP?!" Taehyung yelled exasperatedly.

"Nothing relevant, just like your Gucci specs," Lisa shrugged before Yoongi could come up with a snappy comeback.

" _OOOOOOHHH_ ," yelled the rest of the boys, laughing at Taehyung's offended face.

Yoongi grinned proudly and nuzzled her forehead. "I couldn't have put it better myself, love."

"I learn from the best," she winked before settling to sleep against him, with his cap perched on her head and a smirk on her face.


	10. You Never Walk Alone

Yoongi poured himself a glass as distant fireworks exploded over Seoul's skyline.

"Happy New Year..." he whispered to the dark and empty hotel room.

He took a sip of the whiskey and choked.

>

He woke up next morning to the sound of buzzing angry bees. He covered his head to get away from the swarm but the annoying noise didn't go away. In a huff, he threw off the covers, blinking around the room looking for the bees that had somehow invaded his room.

It was only when his eyes fell on the vibrating phone on top of the dresser that he realised somebody was calling.

_Could it be..._

Fumbling for the call button, he held it up to check the caller. Blearily, he made out the name _Annoying Brat #2._

_Oh. False alarm._

"Morning Tae..." Yoongi grunted.

"Hyung, I can't talk right now, Jen's getting the kids ready--"

"Why are you calling then?" Yoongi yawned.

"To wish you happy new year of course! You didn't think I'd forget right?" The man on the other side sounded offended.

It brought the ghost of a smile to Yoongi's face: he wasn't one to waste an opportunity to tease his dongsaeng.

"Oh I wouldn't know...up all night getting it on with the wifey to welcome in the new year might have messed up with your addled brains. Who's to know if you don't forget my name entirely by next year since, and I quote ' _Jennie screws me up so good_ '?"

"Yoongi!" Taehyung complained, "cut the crap, it's New Year's!"

"Yeah. Like I care." Yoongi said bitterly, the momentary playfulness forgotten as reality sank in.

His hand unconsciously slid across the mattress, pausing when it approached the cold, empty spot next to him. His heart clenched tighter as his fist curled in the sheet.

"You should go. Your family's waiting for you," Yoongi said finally when he heard children's voices clamouring for Taehyung's attention.

"Yoongi wait."

Yoongi stilled when he heard Jennie on the line. "Oh...hey, Mrs Kim."

He could practically see her rolling her eyes and it made him smile a little: she didn't appreciate the formalities.

"Yoongi, why don't you come over for lunch? We're getting together, all of us."

"Even Joon and Rose?"

"Yep. They're supposed to land in fifty minutes, Tae and I will be picking them up."

"Mmm."

"Come on," Jennie coaxed, "it's not everyday that the whole gang meets up. Your nieces and nephew miss you. And I mean, Kookie is even bringing his new girlfriend! He'd be thrilled if you were to meet her, he wants to introduce her properly to us....cos we're family."

_Family._

Yoongi gritted his teeth. "I see..."

There was a pause before Jennie spoke again, more softly. "Yoongi, I know you might not be in the mood but...it would be good seeing you. We haven't met up in a while-"

"I have plans," Yoongi said abruptly, "I'll text you if I change my mind."

He hung up and let the phone drop on the bed as he fell back on the pillows.

The ceiling was so bland and boring and pointless.

_He could relate._

_All meaning drained from his life after what happened._

Yoongi covered his face with an arm, suppressing the urge to scream.

********

He had grown to loathe the clean smell of hospitals.

Firstly, because of his own personal experience when he and Taehyung had been hospitalised during their concert.

Secondly, because of Lisa's horrifying brush with death.

Thirdly, because of...

"I'm sorry Mr Min. We couldn't save the baby."

Yoongi stared at the sorrowful doctors, a tennis ball lodging in his throat.

"My....my wife?" he choked out.

"She's okay. You can go in see her."

Lisa was marble-white when he walked in, lips clamped shut and her eyes glossy with tears.

"Yoongi, our baby..."

He enveloped her in a hug, crushing her fragile body against his chest as she cried into his neck. He felt the stabbing pain penetrate his heart, disappointment and grief for the child he would never get to see grow up washing over him like a tsunami.

_Don't cry._

_don't cry._

_not now._

_not now._

_focus on her._

_she's ok._

_she's alive._

He held her as if he was the one going to break instead of her. She wrapped her arms around him just as tightly, pressing their foreheads together as they mourned for the child that was so cruelly wrenched out of their eager hands.

"I wanted him to have your nose," she chuckled tearfully as she booped Yoongi's nose. "All the girls would fall for him if he had your cute nose."

Yoongi chuckled as well as he wiped away her tears. "I wanted him to have your smile. He would have been able to make anyone happy...with just a smile..." he covered his mouth to stop the sob from escaping him: right now he had to be stoic and console his wife. She needed him to be strong.

He had to be there for Lisa.

"Yoongi, it's okay, don't bottle it up. Cry with me," she whispered, cupping his face.

Still he stubbornly held on and avoided her gaze, refusing to divert his focus from Lisa's grief towards his own melancholy.

But Lisa was just as stubborn and pulled him close, his cheek resting against her thudding heart.

"I can't do this on my own. It was your baby too, and you were there for him just as much as I was. He knew his Papa even though he was still inside of me....You have the right to cry just as much as I do... I'll hold you like you held me...."

And that was all it took for Yoongi to unleash his pain and howl in utter misery.

>

The whole k-pop community was naturally devastated when news of Lisa's miscarriage came out.

Yoongi was furious that such sensitive information had been leaked to the media, practically frothing at the mouth that his family's privacy had been breached by those notorious paparazzi vultures Dispatch, especially that now they had retired from the spotlight to focus on smaller projects.

He had expected for the reporters to leave the former kpop superstars out of their click bait articles but that seemed to be only wishful thinking.

Lisa managed to talk him out of carrying out a repeat of 'Bangtan ending Dispatch party' when the gossip site had revealed Hoseok's apparent affinity for men.

Despite BTS's strong fandom, many Anti's had attacked Hoseok, with strangers even harassing his family and breaking into his apartment. The news raised an uproar amongst the western fans who rose to the challenge to defend Hoseok online from homophobics.

Yoongi and the rest of the boys had literally raised an army of ARMY's to gather outside the Blue House and demand that Dispatch be cancelled for intruding on the privacy of people for far too long. Although it hadn't produced any fruitful results, at least Yoongi felt partially vindicated for the hate the younger man had to endure.

"I actually am rather thankful," Lisa admitted, "so many fans from all over the world are sending me consolation messages. It's helping me to move on," she smiled gently.

Yoongi humphed and decided to leave it at that.

"But the moment people get too personal or say bad things, just say the word and I'll march into Dispatch and break their necks with my bare hand--"

She chuckled as she stood in front of the mirror, holding up shirts for their dinner with Jennie. "Forget about them. Let's get ready--I can't wait to see the twins again."

Yoongi paused, noticing her wistful expression.

Lisa loved kids.

Predebut, she would play with Jisoo's nephews for hours on end and nowadays, she would practically beg Jennie to grant her longer babysitting hours. She had also often looked after Jisoo's daughter, who was apparently fascinated by Lisa's flexibility and studied her dancing aunt with the attentiveness of a scientist seeking to unravel Life's mysteries.

Yoongi and Lisa had put off having children after their wedding until Yoongi had settled in as BigHit's resident producer for their first girl group. BTS members were all out doing their thing: the maknaes had completed their military obligations and were exploring other options now that Bangtan's contract had finished.

Jimin and Hoseok continued with their work as BigHit's choreographers and part-time music-writers. Jungkook took up the mantle of videography director for BigHit's girl group, while also contributing to Yoongi's compositions, just like old times.

Yoongi always asked for input from his ex members: even if they weren't officially in a band anymore, they would always be his brothers.

Blackpink's extended contract had also ended, leaving them free to do whatever they pleased. Lisa stayed on as choreographer at YG, devoting her time to raise the next generation of YG's Crazy dancers.

Jennie settled for a quiet domestic life with Taehyung, giving birth to a pair of adorable twins who were just as pretty as their parents. They moved to the countryside as per Taehyung's wish, although Jennie had to go through hell to adapt to all the new changes.

But still, Jennie Kim being _the_ Jennie Kim rose to the challenge and overcame her morbid fear of the outdoors and its various array of horrors ( _she smashed a cockroach to a pulp using my Gucci belt the other day. That's what you call character development,_ Taehyung narrated fondly, oblivious to the horrified expressions of his audience.)

Jisoo, when she wasn't working on her second novel, helped Jin with running his restaurant together with his brother and expanding the franchise to rival their sunbae Seungri's ramen chain. She had a daughter, now approaching seven years, pretty and precocious.

The girl had inherited her parents' charms but contrary to them, Jisoo's daughter was solemn as a meditating monk of the mountains, observing the world around her with unbridled curiosity and an unquenchable thirst for knowledge.

Namjoon and Rosé had set off on a world-wide travelling trip for their honeymoon and all they seemed to be doing (at least according to the photos they sent to the gang) was basically guzzling any food they came across. They had been travelling for almost two years ( _that's one heck of a honeymoon,_ Taehyung commented), just globe-trotting freely without a care in the world....

Yoongi glanced back at his wife, who was lost in her own thoughts. "Honey?"

She shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself. "I wonder if the twins are feeling better now--unnie said that they had pretty bad colds, poor things..."

Yoongi walked up to Lisa and wrapped her in his embrace without a word. She relaxed and hugged him back, swaying them gently in the middle of the room.

It had been four weeks since Lisa lost the baby.

She seemed to be recovering pretty well: Yoongi had been on the alert for any signs of depression. Although there were times when she was quiet and sad, she always smiled and reproached her husband's affections when he attempted to distract her.

Her unnies hadn't left her side all through the first week and Rose had been adamant about cancelling the rest of her honeymoon to come home to Lisa. But Lisa stopped her, reasoning that all she needed right now was a little time alone with Yoongi, until she bounces back like before.

Time heals all wounds, so they say.

Yoongi cuddled with her whenever possible, spoiling her. He only relaxed whenever he heard her chirpy laughter had returned....

"I was so scared of losing you as well..." Yoongi had confessed, hugging her fiercely. "They said there was so much blood..."

"You can't get rid of a Manoban that easily," she quirked her eyebrows.

"That's a Min for you now," he corrected with a fond kiss and she chuckled. He felt content that he was able to make her smile again.

"I know you're trying to be brave, and I'm so proud of you for holding out like this," Yoongi whispered now in the emptiness of their room as he nuzzled her nose, "but I want you to know that it's okay to be sad. I won't be disappointed or upset if you need to be sad, even years from now, so don't push yourself okay?"

"Is it because I mentioned Jennie's kids?" she asked shrewdly and was answered with his arms tightening around her waist.

"And because I love you," he muttered, feeling the all-too familiar heat scaling up to his head as though he were still just confessing his feelings for the first time.

Lisa kissed his cheek. "Thank you, for being the best husband" she said affectionately, stroking the top of his head, "I...I only wish..." she looked away, "I wanted to make you happy as a father and...I failed..."

"No. These things happen," he insisted, concern seizing his heart like a creeping vine when he spotted something broken in her dull gaze. "Lali..."

He cupped her face, making her look directly in his eyes. "I...it's true I'd like to be a father," he admitted, "but if you die during childbirth, it would all be meaningless. I...this is going to sound callous but...a...a baby can be replaced. But I could never replace you, with all the memories and experiences we have had together. So...I prefer the way things have turned out....we...we can always try again. Together."

Her lips trembled. "How can you say that? Yoongi, it's a life we're talking about--"

"A blank, empty life," he tried again, biting his lip, "Lisa, you're far more important--"

"That's what a kid is to you? Just some trivial object that I shove out of my vagina? Yoongi, it's supposed to be about our love for each other!"

He was surprised at her sudden outburst. "Honey--"

"Don't you honey me!" she growled, shaking his arms off, "a baby is supposed to be...meaningful..." her anger faded as quickly as it had risen: now she was standing just out of Yoongi's reach, looking for all the world like a lost and confused little girl.

He shuffled towards her, tentatively opening his arms and she fell back into his embrace just as naturally as the sun rises each day.

"I'm sorry," she sniffled, "I'm a mess, I'm so sorry..."

He kissed the top of her head. "No it's alright. I get your point...maybe I was too flippant. But it's because...I'm so dang scared of losing you..."

She seemed to have accepted his answer, letting him rock her. They started when both their phones rang simultaneously. Yoongi answered his first.

"Hyung can you please drag yourself out of bed for once? I know snuggling is a very addictive past time but the kids are driving me crazy they want to see their samchon--"

As Taehyung yakked on, Yoongi saw Lisa talking to presumably Jennie, assuring her that they were on their way.

"Yes unnie, no unnie....yes, yes...of course...no of course not...yes...yes..yes....no."

"Well, seems we're running a bit late," Yoongi remarked when Lisa hung up. She smirked.

"Who cares? We can just diss Taehyung if he says something about tardiness, I already have thought up some new roast lines--"

"I'm still here!" Taehyung's tinny voice squawked from Yoongi's phone.

Lisa burst into giggles as Yoongi fumbled to hang up.

"Did you leave him on the line on purpose?"

His wink had her giggling once more. He smiled to hear her laughter.

_Everything would be okay._

Yoongi kissed her gently, cutting her off mid-laugh. Lisa quickly recovered and kissed him back, sliding her fingers up his nape.

"We're okay?" he asked when they parted. He rested his forehead on hers.

"Always," she affirmed, her eyes shining brightly. She rolled up on her toes to kiss him again.

>

"We're okay?" he asked, exactly like a year previously. But this time her eyes were shiny with tears.

"Not right now," she mumbled. She was on the floor next to her suitcase, sifting through her clothes. Moments earlier, he had walked in on her curled up like a fetus.

With a flash of pain, Yoongi once again recalled the exact moment the bloody remains of his second child emerged into the world, limp and lifeless.

Lisa's agonised screams when she came to still tormented his dreams.

She had cried so hard this time, jolted and thrashed on the bed so violently to get to her dead baby that she had to be sedated.

Her wild, grief-stricken eyes frightened Yoongi. They were the eyes of a feral animal who had nothing else left to lose: desperate, wounded and broken beyond repair.

"She was incapable of sustaining a baby because of her weight...she is severely underweight for a pregnant woman, Mr Min...." It was the same doctor as before that delivered the terrible news, raising his eyebrows in what Yoongi took to be thinly veiled disapproval. "Surely, your obstetrician pointed this out..."

"Yes..." Yoongi said faintly.

But they couldn't blame Lisa's metabolism. She had done everything she could to bring her body around the approximately optimal weight for her pregnancy and at first, it seemed like it would be smooth sailing.

All their naive hopes and efforts proved to be for nothing.

Lisa was inconsolable this time, she couldn't stop crying. She refused all the girls' pleas to stay with her, locking herself up in the bedroom to cry. Yoongi took time off work even though a much anticipated comeback had been in the works. Right now, Lisa needed him most.

But the problem was that she didn't seem to need him as much as he thought.

She watched k-dramas and listened to music for hours on end, binged on ice-cream, and generally avoided Yoongi with red, puffy eyes.

Even when he tried cuddling up to her at night, she kept stiff and icy.

One day, Yoongi confronted her about it.

"Lis, everyone's worried about you. Baby, you promised not to bottle things up, so talk to me."

"Talk? What is there to talk about?" she said dully. "I'm a failure."

"No--"

"Yoongi, I want to raise a family with you, I want that so badly. I want to be able to hold our child and rock them to sleep and feed them and watch them grow up and venture out into the world...I wanted to do my part in crowning our love for each other...you don't know how much it breaks me that....I just can't..."

She covered her face. "Is it so much to ask? Why did I have to have such a weak body? I'm depriving us both of parenthood, my god Yoongi, you have no idea how it kills me each time I--"

"NO!" Yoongi shouted, grabbing her arm, "snap out of it! This isn't you...this...Lisa please...I still love you, I will always love you, regardless if I get to be a father or not--"

"We talked so much about having our own little family," Lisa wept. "Like Jisoo unnie or Jennie unnie. Why not us? Why Yoongi? Why?"

She hammered against his chest as she sobbed and he let her, feeling helpless and weak.

"There's always...adoption...." he said faintly. But from the small shake of her head, he understood that he had never truly realised the extent of his wife's desire to be a mother.

Or maybe it was something inane to all women that he would never truly grasp: a biological child was treasured far more highly than a stranger's offspring, although Yoongi considered adoption as a very noble act.

"Yoongi, we...we should take a break..." Lisa said suddenly, wiping her face dry of tears.

His heart dropped in the pit of his stomach.

"What?"

"I'm only holding you back from your work with my moping and depression. I need to give myself some space...give _you_ some space...before everything falls apart--"

"Lali no," Yoongi whispered. The dormant demons stirred at the back of his mind, their interest piqued as he desperately fought to quash their resurrection, "I don't care about my work as long as you're safe and happy, we'll get through this--"

She kissed him, the first time in days _(or was it weeks?)_ and he didn't bother finishing his sentence, focusing instead on the sensation of her fruity scent engulfing him, the aching in his heart immediately subsiding at her touch.  
Even Lisa's tense posture melted against him, her arms circling around his neck as he deepened their kiss.

He grew alarmed when he looked down properly at her and realised just how much weight she had dropped.

"Oppa," Lisa mumbled softly, "have you looked at yourself lately? You have bags under your eyes and your cute puffy cheeks are gone. I'm the cause of that."

"No," he insisted, "Lisa, don't put the blame on yourself. It's just...I just..."

"You've been worrying and worrying about me," she finished for him.

The ghost of a smile crossed her face when he stared. "You thought I wouldn't notice? I felt guilty for putting you through this when the first time we managed just fine but I can't shake off this funk. I love you for putting up with me, for holding back on your work to make sure I'm alright. But I can't forgive myself for caging you like this Yoongi."

Lisa turned away to gaze out of the window. " I...I was thinking of going back to Mom's...at least maybe until the New Year passes...."

Yoongi's fingers tightened around her wrists. "I'll go with you--"

Lisa shook her head. "No. I need space, I need to clear my head and get away from this place...all the things we bought...the nursery...I have to go."

Yoongi felt his world crumbling. It sounded like she was saying goodbye.

"But you'll come back...?"

Black fathomless fear gripped his whole being, making him shake. "You'll come back to me?"he pleaded again.

"Yes," she said firmly, the old familiar gleam in her eyes restoring some semblance of hope in Yoongi: even when the situation seemed dire, Lisa was still fighting. He inwardly cheered.

"This isn't a goodbye: I need a break to help reset myself and get back on track. I don't want to drag you down with me in the meantime. I want to be a good wife and take care of you. With my current self, I won't be able to do that. You should go stay with the other boys ok? I'm sure some breathing space will be good for the both of us..."

Jump to him watching her pack some of her belongings from the doorway after she had gotten off the phone with her mother. He stood with his arms folded, helplessness stealing over him when he realised that she was really leaving.

"We're okay?" he asked at length, hesitant of her answer.

He had to know if she was mad at him. The shame within him grew: he felt frustrated for not realising just how deep the hurt and blame had pierced, forever changing the girl he loved.

"Not right now," she mumbled. "But...we will be. I'm not giving up on us if that's what you're thinking...."

She stepped out from amongst the clothes pooling at her feet and pulled Yoongi in for a hug.

"Wait for me?" she asked, rubbing circles down his back. "I'll come back better than before, I promise. Trust me."

Letting her out of his sight was top on Yoongi's list of fears, right after dying, but maybe she really did need this time alone to recollect her thoughts and move on from the tragedy.

And he did trust her.

"Of course," Yoongi said quietly, his heart giving a twinge of pain. "I'll wait for you if it takes years..."

They shared a tender kiss, soft and slow and innocent as their first.

Because to Yoongi, it also seemed like their last.

*******

He walked out of the hotel that had been his home for the past two months since her departure and wandered inside the nearby park, shuffling aimlessly beneath the bare trees.

The hotel staff had all gotten used to him: he'd wake up, grab a bottle of water, check for any mail from Thailand (specifically Bangkok) as he passed on his way out of the lobby to work, come back around five, go to the gym room for the free wi-fi then trek back up to his room, call for room service to order dinner, tip them, call them back up to clear the plates and then settle in for the night.

Dispatch had also gotten wind of Lisa's suspicious absence but Yoongi didn't care what the public thought: all of their friends and family were aware of the circumstances behind Lisa's decision so anyone else could just go drown in the ocean and leave him alone.

He couldn't bear to stay in their empty house: staying in a hotel, although frowned upon by Jennie because she deemed it to be an exercise in temptation ( _I know you love Lisa but there are so many hoes ready to fling themselves at you and you're not in your best state of mind right now_ ), was to Yoongi a way of coping.

He could pretend it was like back in the days when they had both been active in their bands and travelling constantly, without seeing each other for weeks on end.

But this time, not even hurried phone calls or even a brief text message came his way: it was absolute radio silence from Lisa's end, with occasional reassurances from her mother when he phoned because he couldn't bear the silence anymore.

Although his relationship with Lisa had a rock-hard foundation, he still couldn't help the doubts that started germinating and sprouting in his mind like weeds.

He knew she was purposely keeping silent and out of contact from him and the rest of the gang just to get better. But what if she couldn't shake herself out the vicious cycle she was stuck in?

_What if she thought that coming back to him would only trigger worse things?_

_What if she.... met someone else..._

Yoongi shook his head.

No, he couldn't think like that.

She loved him. She was doing this because she loved him to the point of realising just how much he was suffering as well. She was doing this because she didn't want to lose what they had.

_But was it really the right choice, being away from each other?_

He longed for his wife like he longed for the warm spring day after a cold, harsh winter.

He was lonely without her presence, slipping dangerously back into his ruminating and self-deprecating tendencies.

Min Yoongi missed his wife, missed all the sweet moments they shared together as a couple: Lisa had been his ray of sunshine, his star.

_Why couldn't he be Lisa's own star?_

_Wasn't he....enough?_

He plunged himself into work, forcing himself to write and compose and produce as a distraction from the grey stagnation he was going through.

Hoseok, Jimin and Jungkook would often pull him out of the studio and march him to the canteen because otherwise he'd stay in his office till the agency closed its doors. Yoongi offered very little resistance whenever the three men stormed in with their single-minded mission to fatten him up.

"Lisa's instructions" they sang each time and Jimin even unfurled a list entitled _Babysitting Yoongi_ in Lisa's unmistakable handwriting, detailing the finer points to handle ' _my cute little meow meow_ ' and Yoongi's mouth quirked up a bit as he allowed them to pile food on his plate.

_She thought of him enough to make a little game out of it._

The thought warmed his heart, laying his doubts to rest for a while.

Bang-PD also warned Yoongi to look after himself, as did the rest of Lisa's ex members. Jennie and Jisoo often invited Yoongi to stay at their place together with their families. Rose texted him often, checking up on him in her caring manner.

Yoongi rarely accepted Jisoo and Jennie's invites, especially if their kids were going to be around: much as he adored playing with them, watching his friends lead their hectic but cheerful domestic lives with their kids reminded him of the reason for Lisa's self-imposed exile....

Yoongi stopped underneath a familiar Yoshino cherry tree, his gloved finger stroking the weathered bark fondly.

This was _their_ tree.

They had their first secret picnic date here, and after Yang had given them his blessing, Yoongi took Lisa to this tree in the evening, when there were few park-goers, just to cap off an exhilarating day filled with tension and joy.

"I don't want today to end," Lisa sighed against his shoulder. She snuggled under the blanket Yoongi had draped over them as they sat beneath the blossoming tree.

"Me neither," he grinned, brushing a chaste kiss against her temple, just because he could. She was really his and it was still sinking in that he could now date Lalisa Manoban.

"But we have lots more days to look forward to," he continued, "so I can't wait for tomorrow either."

And Lisa had thrown her head back, her rich laughter echoing around them. "You're right."

"Of course." he said, smug.

Her eyes glittered mischievously.

"Don't," he warned, "don't say it."

" _Min Suga genius_ ," she giggled, " _those words should be enough._ "

He cringed and his fingers shot out to tickle her as revenge. "You won't get away with this!"

"Ahahaha Yoongi stop stop!"

He chuckled before hauling her close to his chest again. "Hey, let's come back to this tree again another time? This is like...our tree now."

"And carve our names on it!" she clapped enthusiastically.

"That's cheesy," Yoongi declared.

"I thought you loved cheesy," she teased.

He grinned. "Heck, we'll even do our names in a heart if you like. I'll get cracking and practice on my carving skills..."

 _What an idiot,_ Yoongi sighed now as he took off his gloves to run his hand across the bark.

 _My idiot._ It Lisa's answer whenever his comments turned self-deprecatory. She had a knack for redirecting his wry pessimism.

His fingers delicately examined the wonky engraving in the tree trunk as though he had just discovered a prehistoric cave painting.

He had located it instantly: the initials L + Y enclosed in a form that supposedly resembled a heart but looked more like two diamonds fused together and meeting at one end.

He still recalled the surge of elation that crossed his face when they finished carving their initials like two rebellious high school sweethearts, giggling and glancing back furtively lest they were caught by park wardens, paparazzi, or tree-huggers (aka Jisoo and Chaeyoung.)

It had been a while since they visited the tree together, what with Life being busy throwing its many unexpected surprises in their faces.

_He missed her._

He had sent her regular texts about his day and where he was staying and all that jazz. He waited and waited on New Year's eve, hoping she'd surprise him and show up all happy and rejuvenated, ready to continue walking along the flower road with him.

But that was just a little wishful fantasy he told himself.

Despite the odds of it ever happening, Yoongi declined all of Jennie's invitations to spend new year's eve with the rest of the gang in the faint hope that Lisa might come back.

He ignored the persistent gut feeling telling him that Lisa wouldn't show up: not so soon after the tragedy anyway. She might need more than a good few months to recuperate.

He felt pathetic waiting and hanging on to a shred of hope that she would manage to spring the most delightful surprise ever and come back home to her husband.

But nonetheless, he waited the whole day, watching the hands on the clock crawl round and round and round and round, over and over.

When the clock struck a quarter to twelve, he gave up and poured himself a shot of whiskey. He continued drinking as crowds thronged the streets beneath his window in a celebratory mood. When fireworks erupted in the distance and shouts reverberated through the night, Yoongi simply toasted another glass all by himself in the dark room and then fell asleep by five past twelve.

He didn't like this new year already.....

Yoongi sighed as he put his gloves back on, Jennie's words from her phone call earlier replaying in his head.

As always, his thoughts drifted back to Lisa. He imagined her pouting at him now and wagging her finger.

 _I didn't tell you to cut yourself off from people now, did I?_ she asked.

Great, he was starting to imagine her voice too.

He sighed again, shoulders slumped, and toddled off to the nearest toy store hoping that it was open.

>

"Oh...Yoongi?" Jennie said as she opened the door.

"Samchon!" squealed the twins as they tumbled past Jennie's legs to greet their uncle.

"Samchon look look I'm a big bear RAWWWRRRR!" said the boy in an adorable bear onesie. He had his father's wide smile, showing two missing front teeth.

"And I'm a baby shark! du-du-du-du!" squealed the little girl with her puffy mandu cheeks that Jisoo loved to pinch.

Yoongi laughed as the brother and sister crowded around his ankles and pulled at his arms, clamouring for his attention. They were a boisterous duo, forever bickering but sticking together like glue when they come up with their latest mischief, showcasing puppy eyes when caught in their naughty acts. The household echoed with their excited voices.

"Uncle Chimmy bought us airplanes!" the little shark announced importantly.

"Yeah and it's sooooo big!" her brother concurred, flapping his arms as he waddled around Yoongi.

Yoongi's eyes widened and he hurriedly glanced up at Jennie. "He bought them private jets? They're barely past six!"

Jennie chuckled. "Toy airplanes Yoongi, jeez."

"Come see it I bet you have never seen an airplane like mine!" the shark tugged impatiently at Yoongi's hand.

"It's just an airplane Taehee, he's been in thousands before, appa has been with him too!"the bear scoffed.

"Yeah so what but mine can make beeping noises too!" Taehee pouted.

"No no I want to show him my Transformers!" her brother retorted.

"Alright alright, pipe down and take his coat--no I didn't mean wrestle it off him Yoonho!" Jennie reprimanded as the little bear jumped on Yoongi's back and clawed at the heavy coat.

"Uncle uncle what presents did you get us? Uncle Joo-joo and aunty Rosie got us a little icicle from Bubai!" Yoonho bellowed in Yoongi's ear.

"It's bicycle you baby!" Taehee sneered as she snatched Yoongi's bags and started emptying them in the middle of the hall.

"Taehee Anne Marie Kim where are your manners?" Jennie scolded as she immediately made her daughter pick up the contents again. "We don't just grab people's bags--"

"Icicle!" sang Yoonho from his post on Yoongi's shoulder.

"Bicycle!" Taehee fired back.

"Icicle!"

"Bicycle!"

"Icicle!"

"Bicycle!"

"Icicle!"

"Bicycle!"

"Meanie!"

"Baby!"

"Samchon tell her it's an icicle!" Yoonho bawled but he soon started whooping as Yoongi grabbed on securely to his legs and started bucking and cavorting around pretending to be a horse. Taehee clamoured to have a ride as well.

"Oh dear lord," Jennie sighed as the man collapsed in a laughing heap underneath the two bouncing baby animals. "TAEHYUNG!"

"You rang, love?" Taehyung popped his head out of the kitchen, wearing a greasy apron and a chef's hat. "Oh I see, grandpa trouble. Say no more."

He tossed the hat aside and barrelled down the hall. "TANK ATTACK!"

The twins squealed and backed away in time for Taehyung to leap and land on Yoongi, squashing him flat.

"Well done, my accomplices! We have our quarry!" Taehyung chuckled, "now it's time for...?"

"PANCAKE TIME!" Yoonho yelled ahead of his sister.

"TEN POINTS TO RAVENCLAW!" Taehyung shouted in answer. Yoonho pumped his fist in victory as Taehee stomped sulkily.

"Come on then, let's make human pancakes!"

"Tae!" Jennie said stricken as the twins giggled and balanced on top of Taehyung, flattening themselves like pancakes and spreading their arms wide.

"Jen, get a photo of this quick!" Taehyung laughed, "come on, before Yoongi runs out of breath! He's an old man after all."

"I'll kill you, you brat," Yoongi promised, his voice muffled from underneath the apron that had flopped over his face.

"Okay kiddos, go on ahead and take care of our guests back there, mommy and I will deal with this one," Taehyung winked. Taehee and Yoonho waddled out, squabbling and pulling at each other's onesie as they left.

"And you wonder why the kids are so hyperactive," Yoongi commented dryly to a sheepish Jennie who was dusting him, "really, it's not like their father is a mysterious sperm donor who we have no clue about."

"Enough with the crankiness, hyung!" Taehyung sang, slapping Yoongi heartily on the back (Yoongi felt his soul briefly leave his body.) "The others are all here. Jen will take you, I'll be along soon, the chicken is still kinda frozen--"

"What?" Jennie said sharply.

The temperature of the room fell several degrees.

"What do you mean _still kinda frozen_?" Jennie glared, hands on hips. "You said you put it in the oven an hour ago. Isn't the burner working?"

Taehyung suddenly looked very interested in his fingernails. "Ah...ahm it just seems that I, uh...may or may not have forgotten to actually switch on the oven--"

"KIM FREAKING TAEHYUNG!" Jennie screeched as she stormed away into the kitchen, "YOU HAD _ONE_ JOB!"

"Better stick to playing with the kids, man," Yoongi laughed at Taehyung's crestfallen face, "nice beard by the way, you look like a real farmer now."

"Pisssh, you're just jealous that look manly!" Taehyung said smugly as he sauntered away, leading a faintly smiling Yoongi to the living room buzzing with voices.

>

New Year's lunch, although late, was a heart-warming affair with all the gang gathered to make it the usual rambunctious atmosphere that Yoongi secretly missed--he was glad he took up Jennie's offer for once.

It was family time and although he felt the pang of Lisa's absence, being surrounded by the rest of the people he loved and that loved him back honestly helped. It helped disperse some of the black clouds that lately couldn't seem to clear away.

He didn't regret accepting Jennie's offer for o: nobody spoke about Lisa, knowing it was a sore point for Yoongi and he preferred it that way. There was a slight hiccup when Yoonho asked about aunty Lisa's individual present (as was her usual habit) and while Jennie was scolding him for being greedy, Taehee wondered out loud when aunty Lisa was arriving.

"Oh no kiddo, she's too busy this year. Maybe next year." Taehyung said nonchalantly as he hauled her in his lap. The people nearest to them held their breath as Taehee frowned and opened her mouth to ask something else.

"But hey, samchon is here. Surely, you didn't forget to tell him all about the adventure you and your brother had just yesterday chasing after that little robin?" Taehyung asked with widened eyes. And little Taehee hastily assured her father that she hadn't forgotten and launched into her story.

Yoongi gave Taehyung a brief grateful nod, to which Taehyung merely winked back.

Besides the twins taking up nearly everybody's attention with their antics, there was the usual rounds of story-telling. Namjoon and Rose especially had many stories to tell about their travels. Everyone also wanted to know more about Jungkook and his new girlfriend, Chou Tzuyu of Twice no less.

"I haven't been in touch with Nayeon for a while, how's she doing?" Jennie asked and the rest of the girls joined in with their gossiping and pondering on who was a couple and who was breaking up and who was doing what and who was having kids--

"Speaking of which, Chaeyoung, are you...?" Jisoo said slyly as she nudged the younger girl.

Rose reddened but nodded. "I'm three months in." She rested her hand on her slightly bulging belly, fondly stroking over the area. "Joon and I were thinking of settling back here soon as well."

"Ah so the honeymoon has officially ended?" Taehyung snickered and Jennie hit the back of his head. "What?! It's a legitimate question, isn't it?"

"Yes, Tae," Namjoon nodded, "we're looking to purchase a house down in Busan by the sea, or else emigrate to Australia altogether."

"Oh Busan is the best option!"

"For sure!"

"Have I ever mentioned how top-notch the quality of seaside properties is?"

"Or the affordable prices?"

"And the views, man the views!"

"Oh don't forget the food, Tzuyu's crazy about it, tell them Tzu!"

In the midst of Jimin and Jungkook's excited chatter, Yoongi quietly slipped away from the dinner table, mouthing 'toilet' at Jennie before padding away into the hall past the restroom to put on his coat and ease out of the door as soundlessly as possible.

Hearing about babies right now...he wasn't sure he could handle it.

He decided to walk to the little lake behind Taehyung' house, at the edge of a small thicket. It was peaceful when ambled on the little wooden pier jutting out unto to the lake, the sturdy planks creaking beneath his feet.

It was chilly, his breath foggy as soon as it emerged from his mouth and nose. He sat down letting his legs dangle over the water and pulled out his hands to blow some warmth on them.

He heard somebody click their tongue behind him and turned.

The first thing he saw was Jin's eyes.

Jin's little daughter stood behind him, her fingers forming a square as she squinted through the opening.

It looked for all the world as if she were taking a photo of him.

A wave of nostalgia washed over Yoongi as he watched her lower her hands.

"Did you want something, Jinsoo?"

Jinsoo shook her head. "I came to sit with you."

"Okay..." Yoongi said as he scooted aside to make space for her. "Don't fall off or your parents will kill me with a meat cleaver."

He didn't ask her why she had followed him: with Jin and Jisoo's daughter, you waited until the answer revealed itself in its own good time.

Yoongi found his niece to be peculiar in this aspect, quite mature and solemn compared to other kids her age. Her parents sometimes worried that she would be ostracised, but Yoongi often told them both that Jinsoo would find her own place in the world in her own good time.

Jinsoo was quiet for a few moments, swinging her legs off the edge of the pier, wrapped in a woollen scarf and tartan coat.

"Samchon, is aunty Lisa okay?"

Yoongi stiffened. "Of course."

He eyed the young raven-haired girl warily. "She's...busy in Thailand. She'll come here next year though."

He hoped that was true.

Jinsoo looked up at him. "You miss her right?"

Yoongi swallowed and looked back over the pond. "All the time."

"Then why did you come without her?" Jinsoo probed. "You're always with aunty Lisa. But this time...it's different."

Yoongi was silent for a few moments, thinking on how best to work around the question.

"We can't always be together," he said at last, "I mean, are your mom and dad always together? They both get busy sometimes and have to go without the other."

"But you and aunty Lisa usually always visit together," Jinsoo frowned, "it's like...like...like Dad's package deals? You get the chef's special ramen bowl, and you automatically get another bowl of standard ramen in the deal. I think you and aunty Lisa are like that, a package deal."

"Oh," Yoongi said, wondering about this unusual analogy. "But...people are different from set menus and package deals."

"Do they have to be?" Jinsoo asked solemnly.

Yoongi looked at her serious face, with the tiny heart-shaped lips. If he tilted his head, he could pretend he was talking to a young Jisoo. But if he squinted, Jinsoo suddenly looked like pre-pubescent Jin with long hair.

_Do they have to be?_

Yoongi pondered on this question.

"It's real life," he tried again.

"But you and aunty always made it. Or neither of you came at all," she replied, still swinging her legs, "Mom was forever complaining and saying that you and aunty Lisa were just impossible, stuck together like glue."

Yoongi was struck dumb.

After blinking for a few seconds he rushed to think up a counter-question, briefly wondering why he was stressing out over answering his niece.

"What if she was not feeling well?" Yoongi asked carefully, testing the waters. He saw her eyes widen.

"Then why aren't you looking after her?" Jinsoo frowned.

And when she said it like that, Yoongi's mind suddenly thrummed to life, reverberating with that single incredulous statement.

_Indeed, why wasn't he looking after her?_

_Why hadn't he been more stubborn and refused to leave her side?_

_Lisa wasn't thinking straight in that state, wanting to cut off from everybody._

_Giving her space and all that jazz aside, she couldn't go through this alone._

_That was utter bull._

_Had he really been so blind?_

"I...don't know," Yoongi said faintly.

They sat in some more silence, old next to the young, like an old master teaching the ways of Life to the apprentice.

Except their roles were not determined by age because right now, Yoongi felt humbled next to Jinsoo.

"You're an old soul in a young body, you know that Soo?"

Jinsoo cracked a smile.

"Aunty Lisa often tells me too. She says I'm smart like my mom and dad."

"She's right," Yoongi said.

Jinsoo perked up as quacking ducks emerged from behind some pondweeds. "Ohhh duckies!"

It was only then that Yoongi was reminded that the girl was barely eight. She hastily ran off the pier onto the lake's edge, eagerly waiting to meet them.

"Soo, careful there, you might fall in!"

"I can swim!" she said impatiently. "Over here ducks!"

Yoongi quickly followed her and took one hand. "I know you can swim but still... we have to be careful okay? The water's very cold."

She pouted but allowed him to draw her back and sit down on the grass.

"Samchon?"

"Mmmhmm?"

"You love my aunty a lot right?"

"Yes of course," Yoongi replied as he settled on his back. He placed a stalk of grass between his teeth, chewing on it.

"Then...why haven't you gotten a baby yet?"

Yoongi spluttered and shot up, coughing. "Huh...ah, grass was bitter sorry..."

Jinsoo hadn't even flinched, merely waiting for him to answer her question, her gaze curious.

"Why...why do you ask?" he said weakly.

"Well aunty Lisa had told me that when a mom and dad love each other very, very much, they have a baby after some time," said Jinsoo innocently. " Like Aunty Jen has Taehee and Yoonho, Mom and Dad have me...and now auntie Rosie is having a baby too..."

Yoongi held his head.

_Oh Lisa, you adorable klutz._

"I don't suppose she told you where babies come from as well?" he grimaced, bracing for the worse.

"Oh yeah," Jinsoo said brightly, "they're made at a stork factory like in the movie Storks! But I don't think they got the part on delivering a baby right since it grows inside the mom's tummy in the real world..." she frowned. "I don't know how that happens. Do you know uncle Yoon--"

"Nope, that's the job of a mom to learn when she gets to have a baby herself!" Yoongi jumped in hastily. He sat back with a sigh.

"Yes I love your aunty and...we'll get around to it...one day....we're just...busy..."he finished weakly.

The little girl didn't look very convinced by his answer but she shrugged. "Ok..."

Yoongi made a mental note to ask for a refresher crash course on acting from Taehyung.

Jinsoo turned away from Yoongi, watching the waddling ducks disappear into the forest. "Well, tell aunty Lisa thanks from me for the doll then, but I remembered her lesson so it's okay."

"Lesson?" Yoongi asked curiously.

He had bought the toy because he remembered his wife consoling the little girl when one day Jinsoo broke the walking doll and Lisa comforted her for a whole day while promising her that she'd buy another doll just like it.

Jinsoo clasped her hands around her knees. "Remember Taehee and me were playing house and I broke Yoona on my birthday?"

"Yoona is the doll you got that day," Yoongi nodded. He remembered the little girl's eyes lighting up as she unwrapped Taehyung's gift, and the way she had hung on to it with one hand even when she was eating.

"My favourite doll _ever,_ " Jinsoo emphasised. "She could talk and walk! And I was so sad and mad that I didn't feel like playing anymore with my old doll, Hana. But aunty Lisa told me that while it's ok to be sad, I shouldn't stop loving Hana just because I had lost Yoona. She told me that Hana had been with me for way longer and still loved me very very much, no matter if I had stopped playing with her for a while. She said playing and talking with Hana about what happened will help me to...well, feel better..."

"And it did?"

"It did," Jinsoo smiled widely. "So, thank you for the present uncle Yoongi, and thank aunty Lisa for me too."

"Sure..." Yoongi said dazedly, "I will..."

Later, as they made their way back to Taehyung's house, all Yoongi could do was stare at the little girl skipping ahead of him, and wonder.

>

"Yoongi you look like you saw a ghost."

Yoongi scratched his head. "I.... I better get going now. It was a delicious meal and I had a great time so thanks to you all, and Happy New--"

"Hold up Gramps!" Taehyung pulled him to sit down in front of the roaring fire place, "are you sure you're okay with going back to the hotel? We have plenty of room for you here. And the kids will be thrilled you're staying over."

Yoongi flashed them a small smile. "It's back to work unfortunately for me, Tae, but thanks for having me, I'm happy I got to see you all."

The boys frowned at him, seeing right through his excuse but didn't pressure him.

Jennie escorted him to the door and gave him a hug after he pulled on his beanie.

"Don't give up on Lalisa ok?" she muttered, "she'll fight for the both of you."

Yoongi returned the warm embrace. "Yep," he smiled, "it's just we could have gone about it in a better way..."

"You finally realised?" Jennie's lips quirked up. "About time you two idiots noticed that you're better off working on consoling each other...together."

"Wish me luck," Yoongi said as he stepped out.

Jennie sighed, shaking her head. "You klutzes don't need luck to get back together."

"You think it's that simple?" he raised an eyebrow.

"All you need is to grow a pair of balls and Lisa could do well with a few extra brain cells," Jennie informed, and shut the door.

_>_

His calls wouldn't go through. He decided to text Lisa all that he had thought about and the conclusion he had drawn from his musings: it was a wrong idea to be apart when they were supposed to help each other heal.

Yoongi mooched around town when he was done with his texts. He hoped that at least she was seeing his words and hopefully be motivated to rethink her decisions. He wasn't going to force her to come back.

But talking with his niece, and Jennie's remarks, had made him think on the manner with which they had dealt with this terrible loss.

Sure, the second time round was far more terrible, inflicting a deeper wound. But it didn't mean that he wasn't capable of looking after Lisa. He needed only to be allowed to do so by Lisa herself. She needed to realise that no matter what happened, he was staying by her side because he loved her, loved her more than he loved himself.

She needed to stop blaming herself and pushing to have a family because while yes, the idea of settling with playful kids like Taehyung's twins or bright little scientists like Jisoo's daughter sounded nice, he much preferred going without either if it meant Lisa would stay beside him unconditionally.

When his boots started crunching on dry leaves, he looked up to find himself in the park again.

He sighed. He was inevitably drawn to this place and anyway, he didn't have anything better to do so he shuffled on until he was in the eastern section of the park, where their tree was. Maybe he could spend some time reminiscing there before he headed home--

Yoongi paused.

Beneath their tree was a tall, slim woman with long hair cascading from a gray beanie.

She was looking up at the empty branches, hands in pockets.

Yoongi thought about waiting until she left, but she looked like she would be staring up for a while. Next he thought about passing her, doing a round at the other end of the park and come back later. He wasn't in any hurry anyway.

Just as Yoongi plodded forward, she turned.

Yoongi's heart jumped in his throat. Logic failed him. This didn't make any sense.

His eyes bulged in his head.

"L-Lisa?"

She tilted her head, a small, cautious smile adorning her face. "Oppa...I'm back."

"You...you..." Words deserted him: his chest was on the verge of exploding with joy. "Come here, you!"

He hurtled forward at the same time that she ran to him, laughing tearfully.

Yoongi caught her and whirled her in the air, her hands wrapped round his neck. He lowered her level with his face and hugged her tightly.

"Lisa," Yoongi muttered, " _Lisa.._ "

_This had to be the best late present ever: she was here once more in his arms._

"I'm back!" she gasped breathlessly, "And I'm never leaving, it was a mistake, I tried to work it out but I couldn't, I missed you too much, Yoongi I--"

He kissed her, letting all his longing and love and grief be translated in his touch as he carefully traced over her face, refreshing the memory of her soft mouth in his mind's eye.

He grasped her thigh, hoisting up her legs to hook them round his waist and backed them up until Lisa's back rested against their tree. He didn't stop kissing her all the while, fearful that she would disappear again. She kissed him back with just as much fervour.

He pressed his forehead to her in their old mode of communication, savouring her presence. She obliged, nuzzling closer to him. Her scent hadn't changed, it still gave him a heady rush. She clung to him like a baby monkey, as she always did, and her lips burned as they melded against his own.

They parted, smiled briefly then dived right back in hungrily, as if kissing each other would ensure they didn't die of oxygen deprivation.

Yoongi knew that they should take this make-out session somewhere more private and preferably warmer but he couldn't care less right now: his mind blocked out everything except _Lisa Lisa Lisa_.

"I saw your messages when I landed and then I ran out of battery," she said when they slowed down to catch a breath. He lowered her down carefully, reluctant to take his hands off her.

"And then I went to the house and the hotel you were staying at but you weren't there either. And then I remembered that Jennie usually throws a dinner today so I thought maybe you were still there. So I was just walking around..."

"You came to our tree," Yoongi smiled. She smiled too, her hand grazing the bark.

"Call me silly, but I could feel just a tiny bit closer to you in that way."

"No, it's ok...I visited earlier too...and it's kind of the reason I went to dinner at Jennie's because I know you wouldn't want me to be a hermit while I was waiting for you to come back."

She snuggled up against him. "I'm glad then. I wish I had some sense knocked into me sooner too..."

She took a deep breath, interlocking their fingers. "I was stupid for thinking I could deal with this on my own. I thought I'd be doing everyone a favour if I didn't burden them with my problems, most of all you. But....I guess I was wrong. Or maybe I'm selfish to expect you to shoulder the pain..."

"Nope," Yoongi told her and held up their joined hands. The golden rings gleamed in the weak afternoon sunlight.

"In sickness and in health, isn't that what we vowed? Well, I'm your husband and I'm going to be there every step of the way. I forgot my duties and I'm sorry for not fighting harder to stay by your side and helping you with coping...we...we both suffered and learned and grew after this tragedy...but maybe we could have done it in a way where we didn't have to be apart from each other..."

Lisa nodded. "I still carry much of the blame for pushing you away and I'm sorry. Jennie and the girls have been trying to knock sense into me ever since but....it only recently clicked..."

"Well, I only realised today that it's actually my duty to look after you but I was too scared you'd break if I tried," Yoongi stroked her hair. "And then I had an interesting conversation with my niece--"

"Jinsoo? Oh yes all discussions are interesting with her," Lisa giggled.

"Yeah telling her babies are made in a stork factory," Yoongi wiggled his eyebrows as Lisa gasped.

"Min Yoongi what on earth did you talk about ?!"

"Oh you know...," Yoongi said vaguely, "the usual things you discuss with a seven year-old ....and she told me a little story about the time you comforted her when she broke her dolly. Learning about what you said....I kind of related Jinsoo's situation to us...it was like an epiphany."

"Jin's epiphany" Lisa snickered and Yoongi pretended to sigh.

_She hasn't changed one bit._

"How did your stay go though?" he asked, arranging the scarf round her neck more snugly.

"Honestly? Pretty much same except....it was that little bit worse without you," Lisa admitted in a small voice after he finished. "But the pain of...the death...did fade a bit..."

"Maybe it would have been a little faster if I had been there," Yoongi said gently and kissed her forehead, "I'm sorry you had to suffer all alone."

"And I'm sorry for leaving you behind to suffer by yourself too. You did incredibly: you didn't drink or cheat or anything."

"This isn't some k-drama," he said gruffly, his ears turning pink, "I knew you were coming back one day, even though it was hellish...but I held out...somehow."

He turned away. "But...I'm not sure if I could have held out for a longer time..."

Her hand cupped his face, turning him to face her again.

"You even got your dear cheeks back too," Lisa said tenderly, pecking him on each side of his face.

"Yeah and you dyed your hair brown." he pointed out.

"I thought it would be good to change it up a bit," Lisa smiled fondly, watching him play with the strands. She leaned against him as he swayed them from side to side. The sky had gradually turned whiter and brighter, heralding an imminent snowfall.

"Hey, let's go grab you some hot chocolate or something? Where did you leave your luggage? At the house?" Yoongi said at length as his hands clutched hers and blew on the fingers to warm her up.

"Can we go to Jennie's? Maybe the others are still there?" Lisa said shyly as they walked out of the entrance gates hand in hand, "I wanted to see Kookie and Tzuyu, and congratulate Chaeyoungie on the little bun cooking in the oven."

Yoongi glanced at her. "You'll be...okay?"

She nodded firmly. "With you there, for sure. Besides, it will hopefully be another blessing to the world, considering the parents' genes, don't you think? I can't wait to meet her in person."

"You haven't even seen Chaeyoung and you're already assuming the baby's a girl?"

"We can bet on it?" she winked, "I guessed Jennie unnie's and I guessed Jisoo's so..."

He grinned as he gripped her hand tighter. Something wet dropped on his nose and he glanced up, blinking.

Soundless and white, it fell all around them, settling on their hair and shoulders.

"It's snowing," Lisa said in awe as she held out a hand to catch a snow flurry.

"The weather is welcoming back Blackpink's last member," Yoongi teased and ducked when Lisa swatted his arm.

"Do you think we can really get through this?" She asked seriously, evidently still cautious, "I can get...a bit too...sad sometimes..."

"I've dealt with those kind of bad days, and bad weeks, and bad months," he said confidently, squeezing her hand as they walked. "Just trust me, and let me help you. You helped me, and now...it's my turn to be your star."

She scrunched up her nose."That's cheesy."

"I thought you loved cheesy" he quipped.

Lisa's broad smile shone bright enough to stretch his mouth into a grin as well.

It was a reflex action to mirror Lisa whenever he saw her smile.

She reached up and gave him a quick kiss then took off running, scooping up fresh snow and pelting him with the white slush, giggling. He didn't back down from the challenge and gave chase, eventually catching her and whirling her in the crisp, cold air. Their laughter mingled as the world around them slowly turned white.

Soon a fresh snowy blanket would cover the earth, bringing with it the promises of new beginnings, just like new leaves growing on a cherry tree that would eventually blossom on a warm, spring day.


	11. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 1)

He watched with a quiet smile as the rest of their friends crowded around Lisa, cooing in delight.

"Oh my God, he's beautiful!" Jennie sobbed. "Please let me hold him, please!"

"No, I have to hold him first, I'm the eldest!" Jisoo retorted, not even bothering to wipe her watery eyes. "Look at him, the little miracle baby."

"Hey what about me then?"

The boys all clamoured to have a closer look.

"I'm gonna be his favourite samchon!" Jimin declared.

"You're already the twins' favourite uncle, lay off!"

"Hey thought I was the favourite!"

"No you're the piggyback uncle!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Oh yeah."

"Guys guys, we need to be united if we're going to go up against Jimin for the title of favourite uncle for the boys!"

"Oh yeah? I'd like to see you try Kookie, you can barely remember Taehee's birthday!"

"Can do! It's on the 18th of February!"

"That's _my_ birthday you doofus!"

"Appa I wanna see! I wanna see!"shouted the twins, bouncing up and down to get closer.

"Well, our newest maknae, welcome to the fam!"

"I already pity him, it's one crazy family..."

"We're all happy to meet you, little guy!"

"He and Matty are gonna be maknaes together like Lisa and I were," Chaeyoung said happily, cradling her own babbling infant busy exploring his mouth with his fingers.

"Not for long," Jisoo smirked and Jin patted her swollen belly with a smug grin.

Rosé laughed, her laughter tinkling like bells. "Okay okay unnie, but let us have our fun in the mean time."

She gently tucked the infant's fingers away from his mouth, replacing it with a pacifier that Namjoon passed her. Satisfied for the time being, little Matty now turned his attention to the source of all the fuss.

He peered curiously over his mother's arm, disoriented by all the noise from the grown-ups cooing over Lisa and her four week-old son.

"Meet your little cousin, Daniel-Lee," Chaeyoung smiled, already getting teary-eyed. "Lis, look at his tiny nose, and his fingers! He's just perfect."

Lisa nuzzled the sleeping baby in a red onesie and grey beanie, kissing his forehead. "Yep, he is," she smiled fondly, rocking him.

"I can see he takes after his father already: he likes his naps," Hoseok chuckled.

"But I heard he has a monstrous appetite like his mother," Taehyung put in with a grin.

"Can somebody slap Tae for me?" Lisa wondered aloud.

"Done and done," Jungkook smirked as he clapped Taehyung on the back.

"Kook what the fuuuuuuuuuuurrbabies," Taehyung hastily amended at a glare from Jennie. "Dude, I think you broke a rib, jeez!"

"Fuuuuuuuuuuurbabies!" Yoonhoo shouted jubilantly amidst the adults' laughter. Then he paused and looked up at his mother. "What's fuuuuuuuuurbabies Mom?" he asked innocently.

But nobody paid him real attention as the adults once more crowded around Lisa, begging for their turn to hold little Daniel.

Yoongi had been keeping back, enjoying watching his wife bask in all the attention.

Everyone was obviously making a big fuss because finally, Yoongi and Lisa had gotten lucky.

And Yoongi could now say that Life was truly complete.

>>>>>

After so many trials and tribulations, with Lisa near giving up and fearful of going through the same pain for a third time, they were able to cradle their little bundle of joy.

He would never forget Lisa's agonised cries, the way she ground her teeth and tears washed down her face as she strained and writhed on the white sheets. He moved to hold her hand but one of the midwives was quick to slap it away.

"I'm sorry, but we can't have an emergency trip to the casualty right now," she explained apologetically, gesturing to Lisa's hands that were squeezing the stress balls so much that he thought he thought her knuckles would break the skin.

Yoongi had to content with combing his wife's bangs out of her sweaty face, something she was too weak to counter—usually having his hands anywhere near her bangs would send Lisa into a veritable frenzy, but right now, she was past caring.

"Yoon..gi..." she moaned.

If they had been elsewhere, Yoongi might have flashed a proud smirk—he was the only one able to make Lisa produce such a hot sound.

But they were in a hospital, about to have their baby, and now was not the time to think of bedroom activities—the obvious pain laced in his wife's voice was enough to prick his worries. He returned to soothing her and rubbing her shoulder, his insides jumbled with anxiety.

"Breathe, baby, breathe," Yoongi encouraged helplessly when another contraction had her bawling at the top of her lungs, "the pain will pass soon. I'm here, I'm here..."

"Baby's crowning!" announced the midwife, "come on Lisa, come on, you're doing great. I want you to give me a push. Breathe in and push on my count okay?"

"And I thought period cramps were painful," Lisa mumbled weakly before she took a deep breath and strained, the vein jutting out of her throat as she screamed....

*

"Here you go, Yoongi Appa, a perfectly healthy little rapper you got there," said the midwife as she passed him the blanket-swaddled baby.

For Yoongi, the euphoric feeling that washed over him in consecutive waves seemed to be endless. His chest filled with warmth when he cradled his son close and when the little boy's lips parted for his very first yawn, Yoongi thought he'd pass out.

It was all too much to take in. He had to keep pinching himself while they ran tests on his son, his forearm littered with red marks.

 _He_ was a _father_ now. _They_ were a _mother and father_. _They_ had—no, _have_ — a _baby_.

"We did it," Lisa whispered with a tired smile. Yoongi turned his head and kissed her full on the mouth.

"Thank you, _thank you_ ," he said hoarsely, "I'm...so happy....so proud of you..."

Lisa wrapped her arms round his neck, pecking him absently.

"Thank you for staying with me," she whispered tenderly. Yoongi had a feeling she wasn't just talking about staying with her in the labour room whilst she was birthing.

Many times he had heard her sniffling in her sleep and when he cuddled her closer, she'd confess to her deepest fear: that Yoongi would leave her since she was unable to give him children. Each time, he would patiently reassure her that it would be madness to leave. And Lisa gratefully burrowed her face in his chest, her demons temporarily banished.

He sat on the bed next to her, both of them enchanted by the baby boy Yoongi held.

"I think he has your lips," Yoongi smiled as he pointed, stroking the baby's cheeks.

"Look at his tufty hair, there's so little of it. He's practically bald!" Lisa cooed, "that's exactly what you're gonna look like when you're fifty."

"Already you're back to dissing me?" Yoongi complained, smiling fondly regardless.

She giggled, wincing as she shifted in the bed. "Hey, maybe it's the anaesthesia, I do feel kinda....buoyant."

"They didn't give you any anaesthesia honey. It's just the hormones talking," her husband quipped, shaking his head.

"Well maybe birthing makes you lose your brain cells, I wouldn't know," Lisa shrugged. "And oh, did I mention—"

Yoongi kissed her again gently, and Lisa was quick to respond, pulling him closer from his nape and playing with the small hairs at the back of his neck, exactly the way he loved.

"You're tired," Yoongi chuckled when they parted, "that's why you're spouting stuff. Junior here doesn't seem to be hungry yet so I'll just take him back to the nursery and let you have your rest, yeah? Here, hold him a little more until you doze off."

Lisa glanced up anxiously then back down at the sleeping baby in her arms. "I... I don't want him to be swapped with someone else, like they do in k-dramas. Can't he sleep here with me?"

"You watch too much TV," her husband laughed, "Look, he's already got his tag, sweetheart." The bracelet round their son's ankle read _Min Daniel-Lee._

"Daniel-Lee...." Lisa smiled tenderly, kissing her baby's foot, "I just want to smother him with kisses and squeeze the life out of him."

"Oh no no no, not on my watch. Our son is _not_ Leo two-point-oh," Yoongi said firmly making Lisa giggle.

"Admit it, you want to do the same."

"No I don't, I'm a sensible man," he answered firmly but he couldn't help the quirk at the corner of his lips.

"Oh yeah?"

"Is that a challenge, Mrs Min?"

"It would seem so, Mr Min. I mean, you did marry a crackhead. Doesn't sound very sensible to me,"she reasoned playfully.

Yoongi's face broke into a smile. "You're irresistibly adorable you know?"he whispered as he leaned in to wrap his arms around her, carefully including Daniel in the hug as well.

Yoongi nuzzled Lisa's hair, both of them unable to tear their adoring gaze away from the baby sound asleep. They were completely under their son's spell, neither wanting to budge from this peaceful oasis.

Right now, Yoongi felt complete, the universe of his dreams was finally whole: every tear, every splinter in his heart, every sleepless night, every grey day was now healed and patched up, warm sunshine replacing the dreary rain.

Scars would remain, but Yoongi would treasure those painful memories that made him appreciate the blessings he receives in return.

"Well...seems like I lost this time huh?"he heard Lisa say ruefully.

Yoongi grinned. Lisa had guessed their firstborn would be a girl, while Yoongi had been confident the baby would be a boy. They had left it as a surprise until their child was born.

"I'm so glad we didn't bet on anything," Lisa added with a chuckle.

"I wouldn't have to ask for anything, except for you to be healthy and happy and the baby to be born healthy as well." Yoongi planted a kiss on the crown of her head. "I know I said this already but thank you, thank you, _thank you_ , you have made me...the happiest...and I'm so, so immensely proud of you."

Lisa snuggled close, her eyes clear and shining. "I love you."

"I love you too." he replied as she leaned comfortably against him, tracing Daniel's features with the lightest of touches.

Breathing in her warm tangerine scent beneath the lingering sweat and coppery traces in the air, Yoongi thought that maybe hospitals weren't such bad places after all.

"I suppose we should let the others know now huh? What time is it?" Lisa said at length.

"Leave that to me, they're gonna go ballistic."

"Absolutely." She softly prodded the baby's chubby cheeks. "He's gonna take after his appa for sure, look at him sleeping so well."

"Hey but that's because he was hard at work being born okay? That must have been pretty traumatic for him. He needs his beauty sleep," Yoongi protested to which Lisa giggled.

"Oh I just thought—our members are gonna tease you like crazy. I mean, Daniel-Lee? I'm your wife and I really don't mind— I actually like the ring of it—but honey, the name just screams 'fanboy'."

"Lay off, you!" Yoongi laughed, rubbing his nape uncertainly. Lisa flashed a wicked grin.

"You basically pulled off a Harry Potter. You know, naming his poor kid after his teacher."

"Lisa! I'm gonna tickle you!"

"Uh uh uh, I have the baby," Lisa laughed but was abruptly cut off when she strained her abdomen too much. Yoongi reached out in concern but the way she smirked up at him made him realise she was about to deal the killing blow: he was doomed.

"Why don't you just go ahead and tell your idol that your son is officially named after him?" she teased, "And while you're at it, maybe ask him if he'd like to be godfather too?"

"I'd be murdered by my members if I did that," Yoongi sighed defeatedly, "but Tablo being the godfather would have been kinda awesome."

Lisa's laughter finally woke up Daniel who started bawling his head off, majorly irritated by his annoyingly loud parents.

Both young adults panicked, rushing to pacify him as Daniel's face turned scarlet when he tipped his head back.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I won't laugh so loudly next time, I'm sorry honey, it's your appa who's to blame, he makes me laugh too much." Lisa mumbled as she rocked the baby.

"Hey!" Yoongi said with mock indignance.

Lisa stuck her tongue out at him as their son quietened and settled to sleep again.

"I was right, he does love his naps. He's just like you," she whispered, giggling.

"Excuse me, but last time I checked you slept for a whole day on your off," Yoongi whispered back and Lisa chuckled under her breath.

"Hey, Yoongi?"

"Mmm?"

"We'll be okay right?" she asked shyly. "I mean, as parents."

"Sure, we'll do it together, like always," he responded.

She fidgeted with Daniel's blanket. "I just...do you think I'll make a good mom? I get scared sometimes...look at him, he's such a defenceless, helpless little roly-poly... he's gonna depend on me, on the both of us, so much...."

"You're gonna be a wonderful mother," Yoongi reassured confidently and kissed her temple as he stroked Daniel's head, "trust me..."

>>>>>>

"Hyung do you think I'll make a good father?"

Jin turned from the plates he was scrubbing in the sink. His dongsaeng was leaning at the counter with his brow furrowed, chewing on his bottom lip.

"Where did that come from?" Jin asked, raising an eyebrow. "You seem to have settled into your new role pretty well."

Yoongi shrugged. "It's pretty straightforward right now. Daniel wakes up, eats, cries because he needs to burp, poops and sleeps a lot. Repeat. Honestly, Lisa is the one doing most of the work right now. Of course I help out but....I feel like I don't have much to do....like I haven't really started doing my actual job, you know?"

Jin turned off the faucet and dried his hands before turning back to the younger man. Laughter and squeals abound from the living room where the rest of their members were still congregated, catching up with each other and laughing with their spouses and children.

Although they had retired from the public eye, the former superstars still led quite hectic lives that often times had them too busy to meet up as frequently as they would have liked to.

Thus, any time they could get away, the whole gang would take a whole week off (or more, if they felt like flaunting their superstar status to be let off the hook) and stay at a member's house in turns.

More often than not, they preferred to stay at Taehyung's idyllic and spacious cottage in the countryside, on the edge of the woods. The children had more freedom to run around too.

"Well you're right I guess," Jin began, "right now, it's the easiest thing ever. A little crying and cleaning up nappies is peanuts compared to what you're gonna face later on."

Yoongi chuckled uneasily. "Ahh hyung, you make it sound....daunting..."

"Because it is," Jin sighed. "Look, you had Holly to look after so you know you have to look after their material needs. But you know, animals are pretty simple and straightforward. You feed them, you groom them, you make sure they exercise, you play a bit with them....a baby is different.

It's a unique human being that comes with its own complex set of personality, moods and emotions...and you have to respect that. You have to cultivate it delicately, with a lot of care. You have to walk a fine line between dominating them and letting them grow to explore and develop into decent human beings.

It's not exactly the same like taking care of pets, where they are wholly dependent on you. I mean sure, children are wholly dependent as well, but it's your job to teach your child how to be...well, an independent person as they navigate the world. Manners and such...making sure they can integrate well in society...to be accepted..."

Yoongi frowned, confused. "Are we still talking about me, hyung?"

Jin smiled faintly. "Well, I suppose you can worry about that when Daniel grows up a bit more..."

"Seokjin, is everything alright?" Yoongi asked in concern when the elder lapsed into silence. He couldn't remember the last time his cheerful hyung was this absent-minded and distracted.

Now that Yoongi thought about it, Jin hadn't even cracked one of his awful dad jokes since they arrived at Tae's the day before.

"Yeah, I'm good, don't worry. It's just....a little tension Jisoo and I have....because we don't always understand what's going on through Jinsoo's mind. And we wish we did. We want to be there for our baby but...she keeps so quiet these days," Jin confessed heavily.

"Soo tries so hard to be there for our little girl, tries to talk to her and get down on her level. But Jinsoo.... she's different from me and her mom and...well, we're still learning I guess... but it's not easy."

"Oh," Yoongi said, because he didn't know what else to say.

"Yeah...and Soo's with child too, we're kinda apprehensive about it, to be honest."

Yoongi blinked. "Why would you be? Isn't...isn't it what you guys wanted?"

"It is, it is," Jin reassured with a familiar smile, "believe me, I was thrilled. I went straight home form the restaurant just so I could hug her and I got a speeding ticket for my troubles but I couldn't care less.... I don't think Jinsoo is as excited though...."

"How would you know?"

"Just a feeling," Jin said darkly, "she doesn't talk..."

"Hey, she's just a kid. Maybe she doesn't really understand what's going to happen exactly," Yoongi reasoned.

"We did explain..."

"Give her some time, maybe she will warm up to the idea of having a little brother or sister."

"Maybe..." Jin said doubtfully.

"She's still a kid, Jin, don't be so hard on yourself." Yoongi reasoned.

"You know...assuming just because they're kids they won't understand is demeaning." Jin told him. "They can understand some things about their surroundings better than you can."

When Yoongi reflected on this statement, he had to admit it was true.

_After all, wasn't it Jinsoo who made him realise his mistake when he and Lisa had decided to take a break after her miscarriages?_

A few seconds of silence blanketed them, with Jin gazing steadfastly down at the floor, gripping tightly to the edge of the sink behind him as Yoongi wracked his brains for some platitude he could reassure his hyung with.

"Well...I think you're a great Dad to her. She's a good kid, sensitive and mature for her age. Most of the other children are spoiled brats with phones and the latest padded jackets already."

Jin gave him a grateful smile. "Thanks, but I'm not sure Jinsoo would agree."

"That she's a good kid?"

"That I'm a good enough father for her...."

Jin seemed to rouse himself from his brooding. "Enough about me. Yoongi, just be yourself. You and Lisa love each other. I would say, love your son the same way you love Lisa. Show him how to respect people and how to love himself, how to love people and the world. If you do that, I think you would be doing more than enough. The rest will come to him, so just enjoy your time with your family."

"Oh, okay...thanks hyung. I'm sure things will clear up with Jinsoo soon," Yoongi said uncertainly.

But Jin had already left the kitchen.

>

Yoongi was pondering over Seokjin's unusual words when a shadow fell over the music sheets spread out on the coffee table. When he looked over his shoulder, Jisoo was smiling down at him as she held a fussy Daniel.

"The girls are going to start cooking. Lisa is asking if you want extra cheese in the sauce?"

"Yes please, like approximately two extra handfuls, but go easy on the salt and on no account should she add more than one clove of garlic. _One clove_. Also tell her to be strict with timing: it should simmer for no more than ten minutes at most, seven minutes at the very least. Tell her not to forget the timer," he replied and held out his hands to take his son.

When he noticed Jisoo's blank face he chuckled. "What? I cook a lot when I'm at home, you know?"

"So Lisa says," Jisoo laughed now as she passed him Daniel. "It's never too late to join the restaurant as our in-house chef. It would be good publicity anyway."

"I'll get back to you on that," Yoongi grinned as he blew a raspberry on Daniel's stomach, making the little boy giggle. "And oh, you shouldn't be lifting stuff around, this little guy already weighs a couple kilos."

"I'm not a vase, grandpa, I know my limits," Jisoo chuckled, "but thanks for your concern."

She lingered nearby, smiling softly as she watched the father nuzzle his son's nose. Daniel's face scrunched up when their noses touched, his tiny starfish hands opening and closing like clams.

"I miss doing that," Jisoo said at length, "just playing around you know? Enjoy it while it lasts, because they grow up too fast, it's like a dream. And before you know it, you have a cranky tween on your hands."

Yoongi raised his face, turning serious. "Soo, is everything okay with you guys? Jin talked to me a bit and...I don't know, if there's any way we can help..."

Jisoo sighed as she took a seat next to him, lowering herself carefully with a hand over the noticeable swell of her belly.

"It's nothing too serious really. At least, I hope it's not. Just regular parent versus children tensions. At least Jinsoo doesn't throw tantrums very often. She's just a very questioning child and sees the world a bit differently from her peers..."

"She's more advanced," Yoongi agreed.

"Mentally, she's like ten. Her father and I are still learning about parenting as we go along and the fact that she's growing up so fast can be a little difficult to adjust to, especially when we treat her like a child...." Jisoo shrugged. "Balance is everything. Jin and I try to draw from our own experiences from our individual childhoods, but it doesn't always apply to how we are raising Jinsoo....everyone's different after all, and that can lead to clashes."

She patted Yoongi's shoulder. "Think of it like teething problems, only on a more severe level. If on a scale of one to ten teething problems are like eight, then dealing with kids age nine up is like eighty-six."

"I don't even know what you mean by the severity of teething problems!" Yoongi said in dismay.

Jisoo gave him a sympathetic smile accompanied with another pat on his shoulder as she stood up. "You'll find out soon enough."

>

"Oh there you are my darlings," Lisa cooed as she walked out of the kitchen and found both Yoongi and Daniel sleeping on Taehyung's couch. Yoongi was sprawled across the entire length of the couch, an arm behind his head and the other protectively holding the sleeping baby on his chest.

Music sheets littered the coffee table which Lisa immediately started clearing up with a sigh—sometimes she wished Yoongi wasn't such a workaholic. Taking a break now and then wouldn't be of any harm but her husband was just as stubborn as he was hard-working, and he insisted on bringing his work here to Taehyung's.

Out of habit, she couldn't resist slipping out her phone to snap pictures of her two most favourite persons in the world ( _there are two now_ , Lisa's heart fluttered at the reminder).

Peaceful and oblivious, Yoongi slept on, snoring gently. His broad chest was vast as an ocean beneath the small body of the baby resting on it. The contrast had Lisa fighting the urge to squeal out loud.

Yoongi as a father was just as adorable as Yoongi the husband and love of her life.

He would wake up to heat the formula milk when Daniel woke up at night.

Yoongi would cuddle with her whenever she was feeling frustrated.

He'd spoil her with kisses and encouragements, complimenting her newly slim figure and remarking how lovely Daniel looked and smelled.

He lovingly gave her massages whenever she felt too tense after Daniel had a cranky day and wouldn't stop crying.

He would bounce and rock his son endlessly, with infinite patience, to soothe him.

He would quietly do the laundry and wash up whenever Lisa was feeling overwhelmed.

All in all, he helped Lisa to settle into her new role of motherhood, easing the transition as much as possible. Lisa woke up every day and went to sleep every night thankful to have Yoongi by her side every step of the way...

She had initially come back to take Daniel for feeding after she and the girls finished preparations for the evening's dinner. However, father and son both looked so peaceful that Lisa decided it would be a pity to wake them from their slumber.

With nothing else to do (everyone else had retired to their rooms for the afternoon, and for once even the boisterous twins were on their best behaviour) Lisa took the remote to switch on the TV and browse around. Bored, she squatted on the carpet in front of the couch and pressed the power button. The screen flickered to life.

" _HERE I COME KICKING THE DOOR—"_

Lisa scrambled to lower the volume, glancing back in apprehension as her son shifted and his eyes flickered open in fright at the blast of sound.

Yoongi simply slept on without even stirring. Years of living with six other chaotic boys had him acclimatised to sudden loud bangs, crashes and smashes.

"Please be a good boy and don't wake appa," Lisa pleaded softly as she took her baby in her arms.

Daniel merely let out a grouchy-sounding complaint, as if he were grumbling at his mother for waking him up. But Lisa's warmth soon lulled him back to a good mood. She sat him upright in her lap as he gazed curiously at the moving bright smudges on the screen.

"Oh yeah, that's me,"Lisa chuckled, raising the volume to hear the rapline spit fire in KTL. "That's your auntie Jennie, the one in that se—I mean hot dress, see? She's really pretty huh? I wonder what this programme is, I haven't seen KTL on TV in so long...."

Soon enough, Lisa realised it was a countdown reel highlighting her group's and Bangtan's MVs before the actual programme started. Lisa smiled when she saw the title of the re-run show that was about to air: _BLACKBANGTAN IN CONCERT!_

"It was called the event of the century in K-pop, and frankly, all over the world," Lisa told Daniel with a chuckle, "'cos as you might have guessed by now, your appa and I were pretty famous with the rest of the fam a while back."

The memories of that incredible night on stage with the two groups had Lisa reliving the same giddy excitement all over again.

"It was after we announced to the world that all of us were in relationships," Lisa reminisced fondly, "your aunties and I were still doing our tour, but people were immediately clamouring for this collaboration to happen. It was a dream come true for many ArmyBlinks...." her smile faded. "Although of course, there were always the antis ready to bring us down. But, at least, the fanwars died down somewhat."

She chuckled and kissed the top of Daniel's head. "You'll understand better when you're older, my little dumpling," she said softly. He glanced up at her with wide eyes, the exact shade of his father's and tried to cling onto the strands of hair dangling from her forehead, just out of his reach.

Lisa tickled him on the nose with the end of her ponytail—she had been growing it for ever until it was past her shoulders— making him scrunch up his nose. He fell back in defeat, unable to sit straight for long. Lisa giggled and kissed his forehead before she helped him sit up again.

She made little Daniel clap along to the intro of the concert as it played out on the screen. Lisa remembered the grandest event of her life like it was yesterday. The adrenaline rush, the nauseous feeling that rushed through her body when she saw the massive crowd, the deafening roar of the spectators in the stadium...

Namjoon made good on his promise to deliver the ultimate K-pop collab stage, a concert like no other: the day after the idea for the concert was first floated, proposals for collaborations from famous songwriters and performers the world over poured in endlessly. Yoongi and Jin finished their military duty and the rest of the boys' enlistment was delayed and pushed back.

The boys helped produce new tracks with additional input from the girls. Jennie had been increasingly improving with her experimentation on track producing, under the boys' tutorship. She helped the rest of her members prepare their own set of songs and arrangements they would perform alongside the boys.

As Taehyung put it, the planned event was a veritable BlackBangtan Bonanza, with original solos and group songs, co-ed sub-units, dance covers and group mashups.

It had been one unforgettable occasion, and with all the adrenaline rushing through her system, Lisa thought she would pass out before they even stepped out on stage.

All her unnies were just as nervous to stand next to BTS, wondering if they would be booed off the stage by the more rabid ARMY's, despite the boys' countless reassurances and security entourage stationed around the stage.

It was one thing to reveal their relationship and then disappear into the safety of their dorms, but an altogether very different issue to withstand a crowd of that magnitude (they were performing in the Michigan Stadium, the second largest stadium in the world with a capacity for 113, 065 people) for hours and hours.

Lisa clearly remembered the small meeting the girls held backstage, minutes before it was time.

"We'll show them what we're made of," Jisoo had said determinedly. "A famous person once said: _I'm not scary."_

She smirked, throwing up her hands in a what-you-gonna-do-about-it fasion as the younger girls whooped and cheered.

"We're Blackpink," Rosé grinned putting her hand out on top of Jisoo's.

"And we're Queens,"Jennie added, "haters gonna hate but you know something? We're the ones going out there, performing with their oppars, who are our boyfriends by the way so.....I'll just leave it out there."

"Ayyyyy Jennnnaaayyy," Lisa cheered and Jennie tossed her hair with a smirk.

"We'll kill it," she added and placed a hand on Rosé's. "Won't we, Lili?"

Lisa flashed her own winning smile. "Absolutely!" she laughed as she slapped her palm down on Jennie's.

"HANA, DUL, SE, ho!" and their arms dropped.

"We should really come up with a better cheer you know—"

"Really Rosé? Right now?"

"Are you ladies done with the pep talks?" Taehyung appeared, rather exasperated. "The tech team said we're on in 2 minutes!"

"Coming coming!" they laughed. Taehyung ran away to take his place with the boys.

She spied Yoongi standing in his place, stoic as always, looking pretty swag with a red bandana tied round his head, complimented with his head of silvery-grey hair—a throwback to the _Mic Drop_ era. He glanced back at her and flashed a gang sign, which she returned with a smile.

And then the boys were ascending to the stage on their platforms, and the crowd was was losing their mind as the powerful speakers echoed:

**"HELLO WE ARE BTS!"**

Then they started to introduce themselves, the audience screaming in between every boy's introduction as they joked a bit amongst themselves and reminisced about their journey. The girls watched and waited for their turn, smiling as the boys interacted with the audience and addressed the spectators.

Deciding who would take the lead for introductions had been a hot issue for the whole gang:

"Chaeng, it's _ladies first_ not the other way round," Namjoon insisted. "You should go first."

"For the love of fish, we are _not_ having this conversation right now, Joonie." Chaeyoung was adamant that Bangtan had to go first.

"But you're not just a supporting act, you're standing next to us as equals. You should go first," Jungkook retorted.

"Chivalry is not dead," Jin butted in, "it's a matter of being polite—"

"Oh ho you're sure that's your intention? Or maybe you want the spotlight all to yourselves?" Jennie shot back, "you think you can sneak that past me, huh?"

"What the— I didn't even remotely mean that!"

"Give my man a break, 'kay Jen?" Jisoo said mildly.

"Well tell him to change his toxic mentality!" snapped the younger tersely.

"The only toxic mentality is you twisting words and jumping to conclusions!"

"Ladies please, take your catfight to another room—"

"Hobi, just shut up and carry on eating Jimin's face ok? We got this, thanks for your input," Jennie growled.

"Dayum, well somebody's on edge—"

"I am calm!" Jennie insisted not calmly, very much á la Taylor Swift. Taehyung wrapped his arms around her.

"Jagi, Jin was trying to be a gentleman. We respect you a lot, you know that?" he told her gently, nuzzling the crook of her neck. "You can take the stage first or second, I don't care."

Jennie wilted, rubbing at her temple. "It's just...I want this to be perfect. All eyes will be on us what if we mess up and ridicule ourselves? There will be definitely tons more of your fans, it might seem like we're edging you out if we go on first. What if they don't like us? What if they boo us off the stage? What if—"

"What nonsense, your fandom is almost as large as ARMY." Taehyung scoffed. "And they won't, they will love you. They already do."

"Actually, maybe it might make sense if _we_ do go first," Yoongi piped up.

"Sure, because ARMY will for sure scream the place down once they see your face," Jennie muttered venomously, "you don't have to be so obvious: we get it, you like the spotlight, Min."

"Jennie, seriously. _Chill._ "

"She's on her period," Taehyung explained chirpily. "Bear with it, it's only the second day. If you would like to appease her, just get her some Nutella bread sticks, or star rings, those work a treat."

 _"Taehyung!"_ Jennie shrieked as she chased him around the room.

"On it!" Jimin hopped off Hobi's lap and dutifully made a beeline for the kitchen.

"Well, at least you two can now contribute to the discussion," Jungkook said dryly and Hobi's ears reddened.

"Oh yeah like you're one to talk, you and Tzu were snogging each other in the middle of the—"

Yoongi cleared his throat. "If you please?"

"Yes grandpa," Jungkook and Hobi said immediately, making the others snicker, even Taehyung and Jennie who had finally stopped running.

Yoongi sighed. "So...think of it this way. It's like when you hold a concert and a smaller artist opens for the actual idol, like Shawn Mendes opened for Taylor Swift's tour. If we go on first and then introduce them, in essence, the girls will be the actual headliners. See?"

He smiled tenderly in Lisa's direction. "I'm not demeaning my—our— name in any way, but you girls deserve no less. You're our Queens after all. And a King should be the one to introduce his Queen to be worshipped and adored by the masses, you know?"

The boys were nodding along vigorously.

"Well, seems like Grandpa Yoongi still has a few working brain cells left," Jennie grinned, satisfied with the compromise.

"Does Satan still need the Nutella breadsticks I bring as a peaceful offering?" Jimin piped up timidly.

Jennie's eyes grew round, pouncing on poor Jimin. "Hand them over, NOW. Thanks."

And that was that.

 **"LADIES AND GENTLEMAN"** Namjoon's voice boomed around the stadium. His dimples were etched deep in his face as he practically jogged around the stage in long strides. **"It is with great pleasure that I introduce to you, your QUEENS— give it up for..."**

 **"BLACKPINK!"** shouted the boys and the crowd roared back.

Lisa's eyes were watering as she watched their younger selves rise up on the platforms and take the stage, their eyes blazing with fire and brimstone.

**"BLACKPINK IN YOUR AREA!"**

The boys looked on fondly, seasoned veterans that they were performing in front of such large crowds. They had respectfully taken a step back to allow Blackpink their moment in the spotlight.

Jennie walked forward to speak with all the confidence and swagger she was famed for, her arm behind her back being a trademark pose. But Lisa knew that Jennie kept her arm in this way to grip tightly onto her shirt and anchor herself in the moment, hiding her intimidation of their largest audience ever.

Jisoo and Rosé, professional as always, delivered their cheerful greetings with stable and thrilled voices.

And lastly herself squeaking out a **"** _ **And I'm Lisa**_ **"** before the stands erupted in thunderous cheers.

"I would say it's the crowning achievement of my life," Lisa smiled now as she glanced down at her son, "but having you, my precious little bear, is a very close contender for that spot."

Daniel broke out into a gummy smile, exactly like his father's, as though he had understood Lisa's words. It made her squeeze him tighter until he was squirming and whining in protest. She couldn't help but chuckle, pulling back to stroke his soft downy hair and peppering his scalp with kisses.

"Mommy and Daddy love you so much little guy," Lisa said quietly, "you have no idea....I kinda don't want you to grow up...so that you stay safe."

She started when a pair of hands slid over her shoulders, relaxing into the touch once she recognised them as Yoongi's hands.

"That wouldn't be very fair though, you know? He wouldn't have a life," Yoongi mumbled sluggishly.

"Yeah but still...I just want to protect him from all the bad things...and you know he'll have more pressure as well? The son of two famous idols...I worry about his future classmates..."

She heard him sigh and stand up, one arm sliding beneath her knees and the other winding around her lower back.

"Hang on to the baby," he whispered in her ear.

"Yoongi, your back!"

On instinct, her arms gripped Daniel more securely and next second, Yoongi hoisted the both of them on the couch, curling up with his wife and son in his lap.

"Stop doing that, you're not eighteen anymore, you're gonna seriously hurt yourself!" Lisa fretted.

Yoongi simply hugged her closer, resting his chin on the top of her head. He let out a little yawn, his eyelashes fluttering.

"We can worry about that when the time comes," Yoongi answered her previous question, making her pout for ignoring her worried reprimand. But she knew he wouldn't talk about it again, just something he brushed off despite her repeated pleas to watch out for his back.

He reached out and pulled down the blanket draped on the couch's arm to wrap it around the three of them.

"I'm sorry I woke you up," Lisa leaned against Yoongi's neck, nuzzling into his shirt. His scent had such a calming effect on her, she need only cuddle up with him to feel safe and tranquil, her worries effortlessly held at bay.

"S'alright," he grunted, "what are you watching?" He squinted at the screen, his eyes widening.

"Wha-what—"

"My favourite part is coming up very soon," Lisa giggled. Yoongi groaned and covered his eyes before he covered his son's eyes too. Lisa immediately brushed his arm off their son's face.

"Can't you switch channels?"

"No."

"Lower the volume?"

"No."

"What was I thinking?" Yoongi lamented. "You're such an idiot, Min Yoongi."

"Oh come on, it was so romantic, you sap, admit you enjoyed it," Lisa giggled as she turned her focus on the screen again, a mischievous smirk adorning her face. Her eyes gleamed with mirth, sensing Yoongi's embarrassment.

"I don't even like PDA, if it weren't for Tae pushing me I would have—"

"Says the guy who let me kiss him in front of the cameras just to let the world know we're together."

"Well, excuse me but you had me in shock, I mean you were so skittish when we started out, remember me trying to hold your hand at the market?"

"Ssssh!" Lisa hissed, "me and Daniel are trying to watch!"

Yoongi sat back, resigned to relive the next few moments in mortified silence with his eyes closed and cheeks flushing a slight pink.

"Your appa is a very bad liar," Lisa whispered to Daniel, "watch and tell me if he looks like he isn't enjoying every second."

"Honey, he won't understand your babbling," Yoongi said, eyes still hidden beneath his arm.

"Ssssh!" Lisa scolded gleefully, raising the volume slightly more, "this is the good part."

It had been the end of an extremely successful concert—they had pulled it off without a hitch: no wardrobe malfunctions, no mic problems.

The audience had been interactive and engaging, lapping up every performance—from the two groups' repertoire that now featured new voices, to the sub-units: the rap line in either group teaming up for a rap battle and the vocal line blessing the ears of the attendees with heavenly vocals, as well as the experimental mix of vocals and rappers from either group.

A particularly crowd favourite requested on polls previously during the preparation phase was when Jennie and Lisa rapped to Ddaeng and Padolgangsan, hyped up by their respective boyfriends and the rest of the members.

Both girls had practised their asses off to live up to Bangtan's rapline smooth flow and although Lisa felt like her lungs were on the verge of collapsing after she finished both songs, Yoongi's proud smirk made it all worth it.

Another twist on a classic that had the audience bawling appreciatively was when Bangtan sang Blackpink's ballads and vice versa, heavenly vocals of both groups intermingling and fitting together like puzzle pieces.

Lisa really let loose in the dancing department when she joined the boys to dance to some of their choreos. Hobi had mentored her for many long hours in preparation and she strived to please her teacher. His brilliant smile and the awed faces of the audience coupled with Yoongi's proud grin made all the bruises and long hours put in worth it a thousand times over.

A thrilling, nail-biting time for all was guaranteed when Jennie and Yoongi's rap combo devolved into a steadily more savage battle of chicken or verily, a contest of who would back down first, out of breath and defeated (still relatively tame compared to karaoke nights at the dorm).

And not to mention all the shenanigans that went on during the performances—it wouldn't be a BlackBangtan concert without including some sort of chaotic mischief during the show.

Various members slipped and slid and split on stage, sometimes purposefully ( **"show-offs!"** Namjoon exclaimed), the rest clowning them by attempting to re-enact their falls dramatically (a few bruises were the outcome).

Everyone fell about laughing when Jungkook quipped: **"Now y'all know who he thinks of!"** during Taehyung's usual sensual performance with the clothes-hanger in Singularity. The camera immediately panned to a smug Jennie Kim who stuck her tongue out.

Suffice to say, Jennie was wilding and loving it. Lisa couldn't be happier to see her unnie let go of all her fears and just enjoy herself.

Further teasing abound, the initial promise to keep things kid-friendly practically thrown to the wind. Jennie grinded on a very pleased Taehyung in her one piece, earning screams from the crowd and comical reactions from the boys as they immediately started grinding on Taehyung once she moved away.

But the joke was on them once the girls started dancing with one another and flirting shamelessly as payback, laughing at their boyfriends' indignant expressions (Jungkook, Hobi and Jimin were unbothered and merely egged the girls on.)

There were also romantic moments as well: Namjoon desperately chasing after a hyper Rosé to hand her a plushy—his face cracked into a smile when he succeeded, watching her bounce away giddily.

Hoseok slinging his arms around Jimin and hugging him tightly (they had recently started dating privately but wanted to wait a little longer till they announced themselves to the public.)

Jungkook (who had recently started seeing Tzuyu of Twice) greeting his **"beautiful girlfriend back home".**

Jisoo running after Jin to hand him a water bottle and a kiss on the cheek.

Jennie and Taehyung twirling each other on stage....

Come to think of it, only Yoongi hadn't done anything remotely romantic aside from the brief smile or side hug he gave out to everyone near him.

It had been the only low-point of the entire night but Lisa wasn't really bothered—maybe her boyfriend was trying to concentrate on the concert. He showed her plenty of affection in private but seeing her unnies laughing and being all lovey-dovey out in the open did sting a bit.

Lisa wasn't one to keep grudges and she soon forgot about her little disappointment as she was swept up in dancing, singing and bantering.

All in all, they had had fun—the stage was their personal playground that they commanded with dexterity. It was their stronghold, their safe place that allowed them to soar. And in case they stumbled and fell, the whole gang would be there to catch them.

Then as Lisa walked towards the centre of the stage for what she thought was the ending bow, she noticed her unnies keeping to the side alongside the rest of the boys, except for Yoongi.

She threw the girls a quizzical look, one which they returned with mysterious winks and thumbs up.

She was about to turn to her boyfriend to ask what the hell was going on when Yoongi stepped forward to address the crowd.

 **"Well, everyone, in the name of Bangtan and Blackpink, I want to thank you all for a successful concert that helped us unite two groups of people, two fandoms, as one. Music, as my friend Rosé once said,"** he cast a smile back at the said girl, **"I think we've all seen how music can bring us together as one, no matter the language barriers, race and country or fandom. ARMY, and now you Blinks as well, I am so thankful to have all of you supporting me, my brothers and the girls. You, all of you, are our wings and, so once again, thank you...."**

Lisa had been trying to edge away, thinking Yoongi needed the stage for some last-minute speech but the rest of the gang were shaking their heads and urging her back to the front.

**"Army and Blinks, you are our family. We share our successes and our failures with you, we laugh and cry together, we raise each other up and we support each other, no matter what.**

**And so tonight, I want you all to experience with me a very important event in my life, a special occasion that....well even I am a little nervous of how it will turn out. It will surely be an important milestone but...it all depends on what my better half has to say about it..."**

Lisa titled her head curiously as he turned to smile at her.

**"I have another song I'd like to share. May I?"**

Lisa smiled sweetly. **"No you may not."**

Their members burst out laughing, doubling up and hanging on to each other like drunkards as Yoongi mimed huffing and folding his arms while the crowd whooped and wolf-whistled.

 **"I wasn't finished!"** Lisa laughed as she went up to her boyfriend and back-hugged him close. **"It's not a question of asking permission from me. You have to sing, always and forever, got it? I love hearing you sing."**

That was enough to melt the spectators' hearts and make their members groan in disgust.

**"Whipped!"**

**"Ughhhh my ears!"**

**"No smooching!"**

**"Keep it PG grandpa!"**

Yoongi laughed before settling down on one of the stools the staff had brought out for them. He guided Lisa to sit next to him, holding her hand. **"So, the song I'm going to sing has been sitting amongst my files gathering dust for a long time before it finally saw the light of day. It's a ballad, dedicated to my beautiful girlfriend Lisa...I hope you will all like it."**

The lights dimmed and the spotlight focused on them both.

Lisa could feel the searing heat of the hot lights on her cheek, hear the low murmur of the crowd through her in-ear as music started playing.

Her heart was humming in her chest—that's how fast it was beating. Lisa couldn't discern a heartbeat from the next. Or maybe Yoongi's gleaming eyes were to blame, they were too distracting when coupled with that adorable gummy smile.

Yoongi sang, a sweet soulful ballad that had her hold up her arms and waving them in time with the melody from side to side for their audience to follow.

The sea of pink pyong-bongs and ARMY bombs had her smiling widely, her cheeks hurting from the strain but Lisa didn't care, not when Yoongi was serenading her so quietly, so beautifully.

**_They say_ **

**_I will die for you_ **

**_but you know? (you know)_ **

**_I say it's harder to live_ **

**_for somebody (somebody)_ **

**_So I, (ay, ay)_ **

**_will be your hero (love)_ **

**_and live (another day)_ **

_**no,** _ _**the rest of my life** _

**_I will live the rest of my life (my life)_ **

**_just to wake up_ ** **_each day_ **

**_next to you_ **

**_(you)_ **

The song came to a close, the resounding cheering echoing around the stadium. Lisa clapped too, awestruck.

 **"I think it's my new favourite,"** she chuckled. **"What do you think guys? My man can be romantic after all."**

 **"You thought I wasn't?"** Yoongi furrowed his brow.

 **"Well you were kind of...distant on stage?"** Lisa bantered.

**"I'm sorry...I was trying to concentrate...and you weren't helping."**

**"Oh? Let's put it to the test. Guys, do you think my boyfriend has reason enough to be distracted by me?"**

The resounding **'YES'** startled her, making her hold her heart in astonishment.

 **"That's a rhetoric question baby,"** Yoongi smirked before he turned to the front with a frown, **"but yah, you guys! Stop checking out my girl like that!"**

That elicited another ripple of laughter, with Lisa joining in heartily.

 **"Well, it's going to be the last time I am distant from you, alright?"** Yoongi told her. His face was shiny with sweat and glowing almost golden. But to Lisa, he looked like a god, her god.

 **"Remember what I said about an important milestone just a few minutes ago?"** Yoongi asked when the cheers had died down.

 **"Yeah, what's that about? What have I got to do with it?"** Lisa asked curiously.

Yoongi's smile was huge, taking up all of his face as he stood up. **"Glad you asked."**

He went down on one knee.

Lisa clapped a hand to her mouth in shock, her surprise mirrored by the screaming audience watching the scene unfold on the big screen **.**

A small ring nestling within a velvety cushion in a small ring box appeared in his outstretched hand.

Her brain short-circuited, spitting up random images from the past as a wave of emotion rolled over her like a tsunami.

Yoongi's million-dollar, hopeful smile and his eyes shining like stars was all she could see.

She started laughing hysterically, choking on her happy tears.

**"No way! This isn't happening, you're not..."**

**"I am,"** he affirmed, **"but that said, I don't want you to be pressured,"** he added hastily, **"although what was I thinking of course you'll feel pressured I'll kill Taehyung, the little motherfu—"**

Lisa saved him by slipping down on her knees in front of him. **"I'll always say yes Yoongi."** she told him with the brightest smile she could possibly muster. Her hands clutched his wrists. **"Always."**

 **"You didn't let me propose,"** he laughed. His voice shook slightly, nearly drowned out by the screeches and screams.

 **"I'm waiting,"** Lisa smiled softly, her eyes watering. A glance back at her giggling unnies confirmed her suspicions—they had known about it all along.

 **"Lalisa Manoban,"** Yoongi whispered into the mic but it was enough to send everyone into a frenzy as it dawned on those present that the proposal was happening, live, right in front of them.

 **"A few years ago, I spoke to you for the first time, backstage at that awards show. I never could have dreamt that it would lead to this moment, in front of all these people..."** Yoongi gestured to the audience, **"I consider you all my extended family. With you I have shared practically my blood, sweat and tears, my successes and happy moments. And now, I wish to share how much I love this incredible woman in front of me. Words won't suffice to describe her. But I hope my actions will speak for themselves....**

He unhooked the ring from the cushion and held it out to Lisa. **"With this ring, I promise to stick by you till the end. I love you Lisa, and I wish for you to understand this by asking you to become my friend, my lover, my star, for life.**

**Lisa, will you make this idiot the happiest man alive...and marry me?"**

He winked. **"No take-backs okay?"**

Lisa was full on crying now, tears spilling down her cheeks as she furiously tried to stop the deluge. Thank goodness for smudge-proof make-up.

 **"Yes,"** Lisa said joyfully, **"Yes you big sap, a thousand times yes! If you will marry me too?"**

 **"That's kind of a given....but of course I will,"** Yoongi laughed and lowered the microphone to slip the ring onto her dainty finger. The stands erupted in raucous cheers when Lisa pulled Yoongi up to kiss him passionately on the lips, holding him tight from his shirt.

 **"Welp, cut the cameras!"** Taehyung could be heard shouting, **"cut the—"**

Fireworks exploded and confetti rained down on the couple as they parted and laughed out loud, eyes sparkling, before being mobbed by their members and hoisted high-up on shoulders. The cameras panned out, gradually widening the shot and leaving the stage as it hovered above the stadium like the triumphant ending to a movie.

And then the programme abruptly cut straight to a commercial.

Lisa blinked, as though waking up from a deep, dreamy sleep. _And indeed it had all been so fantastic, just like in a dream._

She smiled to see Daniel had nodded off but her husband was as awake as ever, a tiny smile curving around his mouth as he peeked from beneath his forearm.

"Well, it _was_ a grand romantic gesture I guess," he admitted.

Lisa yawned and stretched as best as she could, holding on to her baby. "It was the best."

"Oh? So you received other proposals before me?" he frowned.

"Yoongi, you literally signed a marriage certificate once, don't act so surprised," Lisa chuckled and leaned up to peck him. "Tuck Daniel please? I think the girls and I will be starting cooking soon."

"Anything for you," Yoongi grinned sleepily and opened his arms to take the sleeping boy. He shuffled up to their room, with Lisa following close behind, having collected her husband's precious music sheets.

Yoongi tucked up the baby in the little cot that had once belonged to Taehee, making sure to cover him cosily because it was still quite chilly out.

"I'll be going down...you carry on sleeping I'll come up for you later."

"Mmm," he hummed, rubbing the back of his neck. He spied the papers in Lisa's arms and moved to get them. "I should probably finish up some work—"

But Lisa was quick to drop them on a table and stand in front of it (she had learnt he would merely tickle her till she was screaming for mercy if she held the papers so it was safer to deposit them on the nearest flat surface.)

"Yoongi, you are not going to work, you are going to sleep and be lazy," Lisa said firmly, "we're here for a holiday not an extension of your regular workday, got that?"

When he bit his lip she added: "For me please?"

And then going in for the ultimate strike, with puppy eyes: " _Oppa_?"

Yoongi laughed, defeated. "Arrrghhh why are using that on me?"

" 'Cos it makes your heart melt," Lisa smirked mischievously.

"Fine," Yoongi relented, "but only if I get a reward in return."

Lisa quirked an eyebrow. "A reward?" she repeated warily.

She should have seen it coming, the quick smirk he flashed just before he seized her up in a bridal lift and tossed her on the bed, as easy as if her were throwing driftwood.

"Yoongi your back!" she squeaked as he crawled up on the bed.

He ignored his wife's concern, hovering over her and gazing deep into her eyes.

"Did I hurt you?" he questioned instead, stroking her hair absently.

Lisa's heart fluttered and she slipped her arms behind his neck.

"More like startled me," she muttered.

Yoongi chuckled as he bent to kiss her. "You'll live."


	12. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 2)

Yoongi collapsed into bed, grunting in approval when Lisa slipped in next to him and wrapped her arm round his waist. Her loose hair tickled his throat when she sidled up close, snuggling into the crook of his neck.

"How do you even do that?" she yawned. "They say Jungkook is the golden maknae but you know what, I'm gonna be telling them that my husband is the golden one around here."

"I can't say I'm not flattered to hear my wife praise me so highly," Yoongi chuckled, "but all I did was make the baby burp."

"It's the little things Yoongi, the little things," Lisa mumbled into his neck.

Yoongi managed a sleepy grin that would have rivalled the Cheshire Cat's infamous toothy smile, before his eyes were sliding shut.

"Hey, hear that?"

Yoongi's eyes snapped open. "What what?"

"Relax, it must have been old Yeontan," Lisa said, "I thought I heard something bump in the kitchen."

"Or it's a ghost," Yoongi said casually. "Maybe someone that was murdered a long time ago in the woods. Tae told me about—"

"No it isn't, I don't wanna know!" Lisa whisper-yelled, clinging closer to Yoongi, exactly as he had intended.

"Sorry, you weren't close enough," he smirked. He chuckled low in his throat when she batted his shirt.

"I'll revoke your husband points!" she threatened.

"I'll leave burping Daniel to you then," he returned in jest. He could practically see the pout form on her mouth, in the darkness.

"Mean!"

"Don't you mean Min?" Yoongi was enjoying himself too much—he half feared their son would wake any moment with the racket they were making.

Lisa must have come to this same conclusion because she gave a low huff and dropped her chin on his collarbone in defeat. Yoongi stroked her shoulder as consolation, inwardly cooing at his wife's dramatics.

Daniel had quite an appetite, he had already fed three times, and for those three times Yoongi woke up to help Lisa, because they didn't want to wake the others.

See, Daniel always got a massive case of wind after guzzling greedily on his mother's milk. He would end up crying as Lisa frantically thumped his back. Yoongi, however, effortlessly relieved his son's discomfort. Lisa marvelled at his ability to manage their infant's (not-so-little) problem.

"Matty is a really quiet baby huh?" Lisa murmured. "I'm so jealous of Chaeyoung-ah. You don't hear so much of a peep from him. It must be nice to feed him and then fall asleep almost immediately. I forgot what that's like. I wish Daniel was as quiet as Matty."

"Wait until your nephew starts singing at three in the morning like his mother, and then we'll talk about who's quieter," Yoongi grinned, well aware of Rosé tendencies when the girls lived together in the dorms—it wasn't uncommon for Yoongi to be up late working and then suddenly receive a phone call from his then-girlfriend at four in the morning, grumbling about her best friend's singing.

"Maybe he'll only inherit her drawing gene," Lisa giggled. "Hey, wanna bet—"

"We're not making bets," Yoongi said firmly, "you bet Matty would be a girl. After that, you bet they would name him Lany or something and that failed spectacularly. We are not having round three."

"Technically it would be round four," Lisa pointed out as she propped herself on her elbow to face Yoongi. He sighed fondly, gently brushing the silky strands that framed her face behind her ear.

"There's round three already? How come I don't know?"

In the darkened room, he could still make out a small smile playing about her lips. "The girls and I talked about whether any of our kids will fall for each other."

"Lisa they're just children!" Yoongi spluttered. Lisa shrugged.

"It's a mother thing, you know? Having little daydreams about what your kid is gonna do and who they're gonna marry. I wouldn't mind Daniel getting hitched with Taehee or Jinsoo. Or if he decides he likes boys, I'm cool too. Think about it, either of the unnies and I could be really related one day, you never know."

Yoongi had to bite back his laughter, swallowing his guffaws.

"And Jennie was cool with having my kid paired up with one of her offspring?" he said in amusement.

He just had to ask, already imagining Jennie's horror at having to be associated as an in-law of the Mins'.

"Welllllll....about that," Lisa said hesitantly, "unnie kinda declared that she would blacklist such a relationship. I told her, _what if they elope_ and she was like, _over my dead body_. But I'm sure she'll come around and warm up to the idea, eventually."

Yoongi snorted. "This is so ridiculous—they're barely out of diapers! Let's just sleep, we need to wake up in another three hours."

"You're not a girl, you wouldn't understand," Lisa retorted as she settled against him once more.

"You do realise you sound like the more deluded section of our fandoms, right? Next thing you're gonna be telling me is you already have ship names!"

Yoongi closed his eyes, surrendering himself to sleep as Lisa, oblivious, prattled on.

"As a matter of fact I do, and I wanted to ask your opinion too. Do you think—"

But Yoongi's gentle snore cut her off mid-sentence, making her sigh.

"Oh honey you have no idea what's coming for you," Lisa grinned sleepily as she too drifted off to dreamland in Yoongi's arms.

>

"I _AM_ CALM!"

Yoongi jolted awake when he heard the shouting, blinking in confusion once he saw that all was still in their room.

Lisa was sprawled next to him on her back and Daniel was motionless in his cot. The weak light of dawn illuminated the room in grey, casting penumbras in every corner. He almost fell back to sleep, chalking up the realistic noises to a simple dream when the strangled voice screamed again.

"HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO CALM DOWN?!"

For a moment, Yoongi thought a stranger was speaking but then he heard Jin's low voice.

"Jagi, please..."

"She's gone Jin! My baby..." sobbed the first voice.

Yoongi snapped into action—he rushed out of bed, wincing at the cold seeping into his soles as he padded out of the room. Along the way he met Jimin and Hobi.

"What's going on?"

"Are they fighting?"

"Heteros..."

"Jimin!"

"I'm just saying..."

The three men trooped down to the living room, meeting up with a baffled Namjoon, Rosé and Jungkook along the way.

They were startled to find Jisoo bawling and hunched up on the couch, with Jin sitting close. He was holding on to her with something akin to desperation in his eyes.

Yoongi's heart twinged uneasily. Seeing Jisoo cry was like seeing the sun shining at night—utterly wrong and terrifying.

If memory served him right, Jisoo had never cried in front of them— she was always the calmest, most stoic person of the group, perhaps shedding a couple tears at particularly emotional events, like when Dalgome passed away.

"Hyung—" Jungkook began.

"Jinsoo," Jin cut in tersely, "she's run away."

"She what?" everyone cried.

"So that's who I heard moving around last night. I told you it wasn't Yeontan!" Jennie reproached Taehyung, who had just entered the room after his wife.

"Unnie?" Rosé said, dumbfounded. "But how did...why—"

"We have no idea how long she's been gone," Jin's voice was brittle, "we need to search for her, immediately."

"Wait but hyung, are you sure?" Yoongi stepped in. "Have you searched the house? Maybe she's hiding in someone's room, playing a game—"

"She left a note," Jin told them stiffly, "her backpack and her old doll are gone. There were pillows under the sheets on her bed to fool us when we woke up."

"Oh shoot—"

"Yeontan didn't hear her go out?" Hobi asked, disappointed.

"Tan is old now you know, hyung...hard of hearing and all that..." Taehyung said sheepishly by way of explanation.

"Unnie unnie, we'll find her, it's going to be okay," Rosé said gently as she went down on her knees in front of Jisoo. "Unnie..."

"What if she gets hurt?" Jisoo's voice betrayed her panic, rising steadily as she went on: "What if she's all lost and cold and gets pneumonia? Oh my god, what if some wild animals get her?"

Jisoo blanched. "Or a kidnapper! Or some pervert...they're out there Jin, they're always following, what if they get their hands on my little girl? I'll kill them!"

Her voice bordered on the hysterical—it cracked and broke as she hid her face in her hands.

"Why would she do this?" Jisoo asked weakly, her voice turning small and vulnerable. "What...what did I do wrong?"

"We'll worry about that later. For now, we need a plan."

"I say we all go out and search. My bet is she went into the forest." Jin said as he stood up from beside his distraught wife.

"What about the children? We're gonna lug them out there with us?"

"I can stay with unnie and babysit the kids," Rosé offered, taking a seat next to Jisoo. But the older girl looked at her like Rosé grew an extra head.

"Are you crazy? I'm going out there to find Jinsoo!"

"I forbid that," Jin said sharply.

"You're not the boss of me Seokjin!" Jisoo snapped, standing up to face him. She wobbled with the sudden position change before catching herself and straightening. Her glare was mirrored by Jin's own hard gaze.

Yoongi fidgeted uncomfortably, as did the rest of the people gathered. Seeing one of their own argue was painful. Especially seeing Jin and Jisoo—the eldest, the caretakers, the peacekeepers—snarling at each other like feral dogs.

"We're not having this conversation. It's unsafe for you to go out right now," Jin insisted.

"Unsafe? I can handle myself perfectly fine!" Jisoo growled, "no pervert or animal will dare mess with me or I will tear them apart with my bare hands!"

"Jisoo," Jennie called timidly, "unnie, please, he's...I think he's right. You're pregnant and all—"

"That's not going to stop me!" Jisoo said determinedly and made to move past all of them.

Jennie stepped in front her friend to block the way, standing her ground even with the cold glare Jisoo shot her.

"Unnie, this is my house, I make the rules," Jennie said bravely. "So while you're under my roof, you listen to _me_. Please, control yourself. Panicking won't help. We're all worried for Jinsoo, trust me—"

"Then act like it," Jisoo spat venomously. "Now move!"

Jennie flinched at her sharp voice but didn't move.

Rosé got up to take Jisoo aside from her arm. "Unnie..."

Everyone was taken aback when Jisoo roughly shoved the younger girl's hand away.

"Don't touch me!" she spat.

Rosé pressed her mouth into a thin line, shooting a warning glance at Namjoon who seemed about to intervene. She glanced at Jennie who was still standing in between Jisoo and the door.

"Jennie Ruby Jane Kim, I don't give a crap about what house I'm in right now," Jisoo said in a terrible voice. "What I care is that my daughter is wandering in that goddamn forest all by herself and it's barely even morning. Now move out of the way you stubborn bi—"

"Watch your mouth around my wife, Jisoo." Taehyung's voice was dangerously quiet.

"It's alright, I got this," Jennie said softly. She shivered in her nightdress, hugging herself, but she reached out to take Jisoo's clenched fist.

"Unnie, please. Let's all work together to bring Jinsoo back as quickly as possible okay? Please..."

Yoongi shivered. He had never been remotely intimidated by Jisoo— her goofy behaviour had him rolling his eyes but he appreciated her motherly tendencies. He admired the calm, gentle and smart woman who loved his hyung and made Seokjin feel so comfortable expressing himself.

But this Jisoo standing in the middle of the room right now was a hostile stranger— a wounded, cornered animal liable to attack at a moment's notice.

The glint of loss and desolation in her eye was strangely familiar.

Then the epiphany hit him.

 _Of course—_ he had seen that same desperation before, twice: it was the same glazed look Lisa had in her eyes when she miscarried.

It was a wild, haunted gaze of sheer desperation.

_Losing a child must be the most traumatic thing to ever happen to a mother, a true nightmare that revealed a whole other side to their personality._

But just as quickly as she exploded, Jisoo's anger faded, cooling over like a volcano. She sank back into the couch to hide her tears behind her hands.

"Why? Jinsoo...my baby..." she wept brokenly.

"Soo-ya," Jin's voice turned soft as he knelt down level with her. "Soo-ya, please try to take this rationally. You're under a lot of stress right now. Your system is all over the place. Please, if anything...think of the _other_ baby. Our _other_ little one."

He rested his palm over her belly, a tiny smile taking over his face as he felt the slight kick against his hand. "Kim Junior is worried about his sister too but I promise, I'll bring our little girl back. I promise Pika-chu. But...I want you to stay here, where you're safe. I want you to wait for me. Can you do that?"

Jisoo's shoulders slumped in defeat. "I...I have to be out there..."

"Soo, look at me," Jin said as he cupped her face. He brushed her tears away with the pads of his thumbs.

"I get it. I'd be raving and raging too if I was told to stay in here. Wondering about my child. Wondering what the hell is going on out there. Unable to keep an eye on things...I get it. But right now, I'd rather have you be safe here then worry about something happening to you and Kim Junior too. Do you understand? I promise, we'll keep you updated."

He looked up. "Phone signal works in the forest, right Tae?"

"Oh, oh yeah...but if you go in too deep it starts cutting off," Taehyung warned.

"We'll wing it," Jungkook put in, "alright, let's get ready. And I say we go in teams or at least pairs."

"Please hurry," Jisoo mumbled, "I don't know how long she's been gone and where—"

"Once we find her, we'll let you know."

Jisoo gave a tiny nod and Jin kissed her forehead lovingly.

"I love you," he told her gently. She leaned into his chest but everyone heard her reply loud and clear: " _I'm sorry. I love you too."_

Everyone heaved a sigh of relief when Jisoo curled up with Rosé, resting her head on the younger's shoulders as Rosé rubbed her back soothingly.

"Alright, go suit up people. We have a runaway kid on the loose," Namjoon said briskly with a clap of his hands.


	13. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 3)

Lisa was, incredibly, still sleeping despite the commotion downstairs. She must have been tired out— truth be told, he had been well rested from the previous day, he had slept more than she had.

For a moment, Yoongi debated waking her up to inform her of what was happening.

But he was in a hurry.

He grabbed the closest clean clothes from the pile—his old LA Dodgers shirt, black pants and black jacket. He also grabbed his sneakers but couldn't bother with socks or the insoles, even though Lisa nagged him to wear the insoles because otherwise his back always ached slightly afterwards.

But it was tiresome having to stuff insoles in his shoes so he just skipped them.

Lisa needn't know.

Daniel was lying wide awake on his back, kicking his legs energetically but thankfully completely silent. The infant's eyes widened, his mouth dropping open once his father's face appeared over the side of the cot, seemingly out of thin air.

"Your Mom's not the only one that can do magic here," Yoongi grinned as he gathered him up in his arms. "We'll let Mommy rest okay? Aunty Chae will look after you, and you like Matty don't you? You do, right big guy? Yeah? We're going to see Matty, yeah yeah."

So mumbling and jogging, Yoongi arrived in the living room. Matty was sleeping in a makeshift bed on the couch, swaddled in one of Namjoon's gigantic shirts.

"Hi, mind looking after one more?" Yoongi asked Rosé breathlessly, "Lisa's still sleeping and I didn't wanna wake her."

"She'll be mad at you later," Rosé smiled as she held out her hands to take Daniel. She turned him on his stomach in her hand and inspected his diaper. "Oh you're still clean, what a good boy!"

"I'm the good boy," Yoongi muttered, "I was the one who changed his last diaper."

"Fine you big baby, you're the good boy," Rosé laughed cradling Daniel to her chest. "Go, the others are outside."

Yoongi loitered by the door. "Jisoo will be okay, right?" he asked hesitantly.

"Hopefully." 

A much calmer Jisoo came out of the kitchen nursing a cup of something hot and aromatic. "Take care of yourselves too, alright?" she added anxiously, "we don't need extra complications....we'll be waiting."

Yoongi nodded and shut the door, running down the porch to meet the rest of the gang in front of the house. Beyond the yard, the imposing forest loomed over them with grim branches reaching out like spectral fingers in the grey dawn.

Yoongi tried not to let it spook him too much—if a kid could go in there in the dead of night, then so could he. He faintly regretted teasing Lisa with ghosts of murdered people lurking in the woods.

"Game plan time,"Namjoon said grimly, stepping into his leader role. He squatted down and shone his phone light on the ground as he drew figures and shapes with a stick in the mud.

"Okay so the woods are like ten miles across North to South, six miles East to West. I think we can divide it into four quadrants and cover more ground that way. Taehyung?"

"Very good hyung." Taehyung turned to all the assembled parties. "So, we're all seven of us guys, plus Jennie, Taehee and Yoonho. And Yeontan," he added after his dog let out a hoarse bark.

"Wait the kids are coming?" Hobi said incredulously, "but they're kids!"

"They know these woods better than you think," Taehyung reassured him, "and they're really great trackers—they know how to find their way around, I guarantee it."

He flashed a smirk. "They learned the ways of nature pretty darn good, like their ancestors."

Jennie was nodding along, smiling rather proudly. "But they keep bickering when together so I suggest one group takes Yoonho, one takes Taehee."

"Yoon and I play in the forest all by ourselves every day!" Taehee proclaimed proudly.

"And we're not even ten!" bragged her brother.

"Is that even legal?" Jimin whispered.

"Do not question the yee-haws," Jungkook said wisely. "You're on yee-haw land, we follow yee-haw rules."

"Anyway we'll be keeping in touch, everyone's got their phones," Jennie said.

"My phone's almost dead," Yoongi informed them. Everybody groaned as he shrugged."Just thought you should know."

"You're turning into Lisa," Jennie sighed.

"Put it on aeroplane mode hyung," Namjoon advised, "why do I have a feeling that somebody's gonna get lost today..."

"Let's not go there," Jungkook said hastily, and the others swiftly agreed.

"Also, if your GPS doesn't work, you can follow the sun's path across the sky, you'll be able to find your bearings that way," Jennie added, indicating the sky. "You know how the sun moves westward so...figure it out from there."

"That was really helpful—"

"You're welcome—"

"I was being sarcastic."

"As always, Min, as always." Jennie sighed, "in fact, I couldn't believe that you were serious about marrying Lalisa when you came to ask me. Now can we get a move on?"

>

"Seriously hyung, was the dog really necessary?" Jungkook asked as they trudged through the undergrowth.

"It's all good Kook, he's not heavy at all, just a puffed-up ball of fur." Yoongi huffed.

He was cradling Yeontan in his arms to be able to keep up with Jungkook's powerful strides. The dog was in his twilight years, spending most of his time waddling around on Taehyung's farm—trekking in the forest in near darkness was beyond what his short stubby legs could do.

"Yeah but still, Yeontan won't be much help," Jungkook said bluntly. He himself was carrying Taehee piggyback fashion.

"It's fine Kook, it's fine. Besides, you never know...."

But Jungkook didn't hear, too busy marching ahead.

"You okay back there, Taehee?"

"M'fine uncle Kookie," she chirruped.

"Good, let's keep calling for Jinsoo then," Jungkook decided. The others agreed and soon the forest rang with the echoes of their combined voices.

"JINSOO!"

"UNNIE! WHERE ARE YOU?"

"IT'S YOUR FAVOURITE UNCLE!"

"Seriously Kook?"

"JINSOO!"

The forest was otherwise silent as they marched on, save for some falling branch or twigs snapping. Taehee warned her uncles to stay vigilant and steer clear of sick-looking, dead trees because a falling branch could hurt.

At intervals, Taehee also instructed her uncles to make a notch in a tree or pull off some bark and leave some of the trunk exposed (not too much or else it would kill the tree.)

"It's like a signpost," she explained, "pebbles and bread don't work."

Birds flocked into the air, disturbed by the noisy band. It was steadily growing lighter, with the sun's weak rays filtering through the tree boughs and branches.

"This isn't gonna work," Yoongi said at length. "I say we split up again. Kook, you and Taehee search this area in a radius, I will try to head in deeper into our quadrant."

"Hyung but you'll be alone!" Jungkook said anxiously.

"I have Yeontan," Yoongi reasoned, "and besides, there's no real wild animals anyway. Right Taehee?"

"Yep!" the little girl nodded vigorously. "Yoonho and I have seen lynxes, but they're very shy! Appa says there might be snakes though, the bad kind."

"Venomous...got it," Yoongi swallowed. "Well, hopefully we won't meet those. See you later Kook—and whatever you do, don't lose Taehee—"

"Yeah yeah Jennie will kill me," Jungkook replied.

"No, actually it's because you wouldn't be able to make it out of here by yourself."

"Hyung!"

"Samchon, don't forget to leave signposts!" Taehee reminded.

But Yoongi had already stepped away into the trees with Yeontan in his hands.

>

"Okay buddy..." Yoongi said as he put Yeontan down. "We're gonna search for Jinsoo, yeah?"

The old dog waddled and snuffed at the ground paying no attention to Yoongi, who sighed.

_Maybe the others were right, maybe bringing the dog was useless._

He had hoped Yeontan would be put to good use in sniffing Jinsoo's scent but in hindsight, he hadn't thought this through—the dog had no means to deduce who exactly they were looking for.

Yeontan was just happy he was finally able to sniff around and relieve himself against the nearest tree. Yoongi sighed and shook his head, glancing at his phone.

Seeing that a little signal was available, he took the opportunity to phone Jin.

"Any sign of her?"

 **"We found nothing,"** Jin said tiredly. **"Not even footprints, or broken branches or anything..."**

"Don't give up—before the day is out, I'll guarantee we'll have scoured this forest and found her, just you wait," Yoongi vowed.

**"Yeah..."**

"Have you called Jisoo?" Yoongi asked quickly, unnerved by Jin's hopeless voice.

**"I was going to wait a little longer...maybe we'll find Jinsoo...I don't want to call Soo and frighten her further..."**

"Okay, I'll keep searching. Call you later."

**"Yeah. Careful out there..."**

Yoongi ended the call, frowning a little. _Think Yoongi. Think._

_If I were Jinsoo, where would I go to avoid being caught?_

Yoongi trudged on, lost in thought as Yeontan shuffled behind him.

_Why did Jinsoo run away in the first place anyway?_

"Were the tensions Jin mentioned a possible cause?" Yoongi thought aloud to dispel the heavy silence.

_Snap!_

Yoongi immediately looked up, turning on his heels. "Who's there?" he called out, raising his arms. Yeontan pushed past his legs, unaware of why Yoongi had abruptly stopped.

Nobody responded except for distant birdsong—the forest was silent, the air heavy and humid with moisture from the early morning.

 _Must have been just a falling branch,_ Yoongi shrugged as he walked on, fighting the niggling paranoia that inevitably creeps up on a person in empty, silent places.

He fought the urge to check over his shoulder, suppressed the rising tightness in his chest that urged him to break out into a run, much like panicked horses do.

Years of being hounded by the media didn't help—they only cemented his discomfort when out and about on outings with Lisa or the rest of the group.

Yoongi forced himself to take firm, measured steps, focusing on the occasional flower and how Yeontan was just waddling around, unbothered.

In the distance, he thought he heard the faint, far-off whistle of a train.

He remembered that a quaint train station— straight out of a countryside scene in anime, or Bangtan's Spring Day MV—was actually situated nearby, just a few miles north of the woods—

Yoongi's heart missed a beat as a sudden thought flashed in his head.

_Jinsoo wouldn't....would she?_

She had been gone for hours....what if she managed to go through the woods and had reached the station?

_Jinsoo was smart, she would do it._

In terrible haste, Yoongi immediately fished out his phone, praying that a signal was still available so he could get his bearings and directions via GPS.

Okay North, he had to keep pressing north, good he was on the right track now to call Jin and let the rest know of his theory—

_Crrrrrrrack!_

He was too late—Yoongi spun on his heels just as something heavy dropped on his head with a terrific thud.

The world went black.


	14. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 4)

**"What do you mean, you're not with Yoongi?** " Taehyung demanded. Taehee had called her father on Jungkook's instructions.

She held the phone next to her uncles's ear while he walked.

Jungkook sighed. "Look, he's not a baby. And he was speaking sense—we were walking the both of us together in just a linear fashion, without searching around us. In this way, I can actually search more carefully. Taehee is safe with me."

**"Where did he go?"**

"Well, he headed north, towards the train station."

 **"The train station?"** Jennie interrupted. **"Oh my.....you don't suppose..."**

Jungkook cottoned on quickly. "I thought about it just now too. What if Jinsoo headed that way?"

 **"You suppose Yoongi thought of this too?"** Taehyung said thoughtfully.

**"We need to send more people there! Tae, call Jimin—their group were searching in that area closest to the edge of the forest near the station."**

**"Maybe we better head there too?"**

"There's still a possibility that she might just have...I don't know, holed up in a tree?" Jungkook said, "we need to keep searching here too. If Jimin and Hobi go to the station, it will be more than enough, for now at least."

**"Yeah, you're right. She might be building a nest or something—"**

**"Taehyung!"**

**"I'm just saying! Kids don't understand that it's impractical!"** Taehyung argued.

"End the call," Jungkook said to Taehee.

"Bye Eomma! Bye Appa!" Taehee said gleefully.

**"No wait Taehee—"**

**"Young lady—"**

But Taehee dropped the call.

"Atta girl!" Jungkook grinned. "Now—"

"For Narnia and the North!" Taehee giggled as she threw up a fist.

>

_**"Appa."** _

_Y_ oongi gazed around him in confusion. _Strange, he couldn't seem to recognise his surroundings._

**_"Appa."_ **

He spun around, seeking the owner of the voice. _Who was it? Where they talking to him?_

_**"Appa."** _

Finally he spotted an extremely short figure sitting in front of him.

_Had he been there the whole time?_

Yoongi squatted to get a closer look.

**_"Daniel?"_ **

His son was sitting up unsupported, his eyes trained on his father. They were the same colour as Lisa's, and the same shape too.

Daniel opened his mouth. _ **"Hyung do you think I'll make a good father?"**_

Yoongi frowned. _**"What?"**_

Daniel's voice sounded just like....Yoongi himself. The words sounded familiar....where had he heard those words before?

When he looked up again Daniel had vanished.

 _This is a dream,_ Yoongi realised, _but was I doing something important? Do I need to wake up?_

He turned around to find himself at the edge of the forest.

_Oh right, they had been searching for Jinsoo, he needed to wake up._

_Something that will startle me awake...._

Although he tried to drop to the ground nothing happened—he was not in control.

Yoongi felt helpless. _How long was he gonna stay trapped in his head?_

_Wake up! Wake up!_

He tried running into the nearest tree but again, nothing happened.

_Was he supposed to wait until his body booted up again? And how had he fallen asleep?—_

A bucket of water fell on his face and Yoongi spluttered, waking up to a wet tongue licking his face insistently.

"Off, Tan, off," Yoongi ordered, relieved he was back in the real forest.

The relief lasted for a few seconds until Yoongi tried to sit up. A jolt of pain slithered through his skull and he groaned. He noticed the branch lying next to him and put two and two together.

"That was a heck of a knock," he grumbled, rubbing the back of his head. "How long was I out?"

To his horror, he saw that the sun had travelled quite a long way, the shadows had grown longer. If he was judging correctly, he'd say it was mid-afternoon, around three.

_That meant he had been out for all morning and noon! The others must be worried...._

To his dismay, his phone wouldn't light up as he frantically pressed buttons, praying there was at least enough charge for a phone call. But the screen remained dark—the battery was flat. He recalled having switched off aeroplane mode just before the branch knocked him out and in that time span, the battery had dried up.

Yoongi clicked his tongue as the throbbing at the back of his head didn't ebb. He could also distinctly feel the sore area swelling slightly.

_What now?_

Yet another discovery had him sighing out loud—he had forgotten to mark the trees. He was utterly lost, clueless, hungry and parched.

"Well, Tannie, seems like our best bet is to find the station and hopefully find a phone. Or more conveniently a plug, preferably a working one," he told the dog briskly when he stood up. "Understood? We have no time to dawdle—full speed ahead northwards. Quick march."

He paused, shaking his head. "I'm talking to an old dog AND I'm turning into Major Lee....fantastic."

>

"Jinsoo......Jinsoo...."

His voice was raw, something that hadn't happened in a long while since their last concert. He had lost all sense of direction—the more he walked, the more dense and tightly packed the trees grew, almost blocking all the sunlight from reaching down to the ground.

Small animals skittered quickly into the undergrowth once they heard Yoongi's hoarse shouts.

_Just how big was this forest? He had grossly underestimated its size, or maybe it's because he was hungry, grumpy and thirsty._

"Jinsoo, it's me, your samchon..."

_He was starting to hear the hushed dark voices in his head, telling him it was pointless. Jinsoo probably caught a train long ago. Give up._

Yoongi shook his head violently to rid himself of the voices. "JINSOO!"

A branch snapped, making Yoongi flinch.

Yeontan suddenly raised his head, staring intently and sniffing the air. Without warning he started waddling briskly away from Yoongi, heading towards the place where the branch had fallen.

"Tan? What is it? What is it boy? Did you smell something? Is it her?" Yoongi said excitedly as he hurried after the dog.

Yeontan paid him no attention as he padded on. Eventually, Yeontan stopped at the foot of a tree and looked up, tongue hanging as he panted and looked up expectantly.

Yoongi came to stand next to him, squinting up through the branches. There was nothing out of the ordinary as far as he could see. Had Yeontan's senses tricked him? Was the dog confused?

"Jinsoo?" Yoongi called out hopefully. "Are you up there?"

And then he saw it: a very faint shivering of a bough, even though there was no wind.

"Jinsoo?"

"Not here!" said a tiny voice. It was the only confirmation Yoongi needed and his heart swelled with relief, only for it to plummet a second later.

_What if she fell out of the tree..._

"Soo, it's okay. It's me, uncle Yoongi. You don't have to be afraid."

"Go away!" said the voice, sounding distressed. "Leave me alone!"

Yoongi frowned. "But we're all missing you Soo. You can't stay—"

"I can!" Jinsoo said shrilly, revealing herself as she glared down at Yoongi. He almost laughed—her pout was identical to Jisoo's but even from this far down, he could still sense her red-hot anger aimed at him.

"You're not going to make me go back, because I'm not!" Jinsoo declared, clinging tightly to the trunk and hiding her face. "I'm staying right here!"

Yoongi rubbed the back of his neck, brow furrowed. He needed to keep calm and refrain from forcing his niece. He needed to be careful not to upset her by ignoring her pleas and just dragging her back home.

What he knew for sure was that he needed to talk and find out more about why she was downright refusing to go back.

"So....so you won't come down and talk to me?" Yoongi called.

"No. I'm sorry samchon, I know I'm disrespecting you as my elder but I know you'll just grab me and take me back," Jinsoo said, "and I can't go back. I don't want to!"

"You'll...you'll be okay here, out in the wild?"

"Yes!"

Yoongi let out a sigh under his breath before glancing up at the determined girl clinging grimly to the bark.

Without another word, he grabbed the nearest branch overhead, testing its strength before, grunting and puffing, he hoisted himself up.

"S-s-samchon?" Jinsoo stuttered.

"I got tired having to look up to talk to you so I'll just sit next to you, like we usually do yeah?" Yoongi tried to smile even though his hands had started to shake slightly.

"No you're coming up here to take me down!" Jinsoo cried and madly scrambled upward like a squirrel.

"Jinsoo, don't you trust me? I promise, I'm not going to do that," Yoongi said, wounded. "I only want to talk to you—"

"Leave me alone!" she cried, "I'm running away forever! Nobody wants me and that's fine! I don't need anybody!"

Yoongi sighed and cautiously pulled himself upwards, praying that nothing happened to Jinsoo on his way up.

If she fell out of the tree at her height.... she was a good two storeys up...

He shook his head, glancing back at the ground. He was only perhaps half a storey up.

Although fear of heights had never really been his problem, Yoongi had to admit he felt uneasy—he was no longer the young sprightly youth who climbed trees on a dare to impress girls.

If Lisa saw him climbing trees now, he'd be in for a good scolding, like a little boy.

He understood her fear though—years of hard falls and complex dance routines, coupled with his military exercises, affected his body.

Although he worked out and was quite fit, there were days when strange constellations of sores and pains made themselves known. Consulting with a professional, Yoongi was told that what he was experiencing was universal and irreversible—his body was of course ageing, undergoing the process that all beings have to go through. Years of wear and tear were now gradually taking their toll.

Yoongi hated that as years went by, mortality made itself apparent in the little faint aches he felt deep in his bones, making him more cautious when it came to physical activities he didn't usually do, like standing on ladders for too long or kneeling on the ground when he helped out in the little garden they had back home.

"Uncle Yoongi, please stop," Jinsoo pleaded, "there's nowhere else to go..."

His heart clenched at her distressed voice. "Sweetheart, I promise, I'm not going to do anything. Your old uncle just wants to talk....you've been keeping away from everybody lately..."

Yoongi gritted his teeth when he almost slipped but he clung on grimly until he found his footing again. Perspiration ran down his back as he refocused back on his niece. Jinsoo's wide concerned eyes were on him.

"Uncle, you're going to fall!" she gasped, seeing him fumble with his grip.

"Nah, I'm good," Yoongi summoned a grin to reassure her.

_He was so rusty..._

_Come on Yoongs, like old times. Grab, steady, lift. Grab, steady, lift._

"Did I ever tell you that many people likened me to a kitten when I was still touring with your father? They called me little meow meow," Yoongi chuckled as he hauled himself up, "well, I'm older now, so that makes me a cat, right? And cats are good—at—climbing—!"

He miscalculated and slipped. But this time he wasn't quick enough to recover.

"Uncle!"

Yoongi crashed to ground in a flurry of snapping branches and leaves. He sprawled in the undergrowth, dazed. His head split open as the pain returned like a sudden thunderclap.

The world was still spinning and he had to blink several times until his vision steadied.

"Ah, maybe this cat is too old to be climbing trees," he sighed and winced when pain radiated around his ribs. Yeontan came up to him, barking hoarsely until he recognised it was merely Yoongi.

"Uncle! Uncle!"

Jinsoo scurried down the tree like a squirrel, scrambling frantically over to Yoongi.

"Uncle! Please don't die please, I didn't mean for you to fall, I'm so sorry!" she wept as she cradled his head.

He laughed and winced again. "No worries, I'm quite hardy you know. I slipped and split on stage more times than there is hair on your head. I'll survive."

Jinsoo stared at him for a moment before plopping back on her knees. He noticed she had a little backpack over her shoulders.

"What now?" she asked dully. She was wrapped up in a scarf and several layers of thick woollen clothes. How she managed to move around so nimbly was beyond Yoongi.

He tried to sit up only to fall back again with a grimace—the pain in his back wouldn't even let him stand. Before he could worry about never walking again or dying in the forest, he turned to Jinsoo.

"Say, this is going to be really selfish of your uncle but....I don't suppose you have food in there?" he said hopefully, aiming to distract her from his motionless body.

Jinsoo stiffened before her shoulders fell. "Yeah...I do..." she said reluctantly and slipped the backpack off her shoulders, opening the zip and turning it upside down to empty the contents.

A pen knife, several packets of crisps and sweets, a ziploc bag with slices of barbecued beef jerky, a water bottle, a box of matches, two books and her favourite doll Yoona fell out of Jinsoo's backpack.

Jinsoo picked up a packet of M & M's. "Is this okay? I want to save the jerky for later, sorry."

Yoongi's mouth had turned very dry. "You...uh...planned this all out huh?"

"Yeah...I followed the stars like Yoonho taught me. But you caught up..."

"Where you headed anywhere in particular?" Yoongi asked delicately.

"Train station," Jinsoo shrugged making Yoongi's blood run cold, "I thought I could sneak on a wagon, or pretend I lost my money. I sneaked some of Dad's beef jerky too, this morning, to eat on the trip," she added, popping the M&M's open and offering to Yoongi.

They were quiet for a while, munching on the candy in silence. It was nice but the little pieces of candy pieces only made him thirstier. Yoongi cleared his throat, dying to ask for water but resisted—it was enough that Jinsoo shared her food with him.

"Would it be okay to tell me why you ran away?" he asked softly.

When his niece didn't reply, he resisted the urge to sigh in frustration—it would only serve to push away Jinsoo and make her feel like a burden.

And yet, watching her steadfastly avoiding his intent gaze, Yoongi couldn't help but smile at the similarities: she was so much like her parents.

_They used to hide their feelings, guarding them behind happy smiles so as not to worry their members, until they learned it was so much better to share their burdens....._

Whatever caused Jinsoo to conclude that nobody wanted her needed to be addressed—he had to winkle out the reason from her in the gentlest manner possible.

"Are the others looking for me too?" Jinsoo asked, stroking Yeontan behind his ears.

Yoongi was thankful he had brought the dog along—aside from finding Jinsoo, he had sprawled next to the girl with his head propped on her lap, making her smile. Yoongi realised he hadn't seen Jinsoo smile properly in a while.

Since their arrival at Taehyung's house she had kept to herself too, barely interacting with her cousins, uncles and aunts.

"Yes they are," Yoongi answered truthfully, "even your little cousins. They're all worried about you."

Jinsoo fidgeted.

"I should get going then," she said shortly, "I don't want anyone finding me. They'll only be mad."

"Hey hey wait!" Yoongi said agitated, "I found you, and I wasn't mad, was I?"

"I'm not your kid, uncle Yoongi," Jinsoo said sadly, "my Mom and Dad will be mad. They'll think I'm being weird again, and they'll wish I wasn't so different. They always do."

_Ah, things were getting interesting...._

"Jinsoo, I know your parents—I grew up with your father," Yoongi said quietly. He was lying flat on his back, only able to swivel his head to look up at his niece.

"Parents mostly get mad because they care about you," Yoongi said, "sure, there are different ways to be mad, but it just shows that they don't take things lightly. They....they want you to be safe."

"Are you mad at me?" Jinsoo squinted at him. "You don't look mad."

"I'm not," Yoongi said honestly, "I'm happy you're safe and sound. And trust me, your mother and father will be too."

"I'm not going back," Jinsoo reiterated defiantly.

Yoongi pursed his lips. "Why?"

His niece shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes. "They...they don't love me."

"How do you know?" Yoongi said gently.

"I...I just...," she sniffed, rubbing her eyes furiously, "I just do okay?"

"Okay..."

They fell silent. Yoongi attempted to sit up again but it was no use—the searing pain that flashed up his back made him groan.

_Was this the end? Was he never going to walk again?_

He glanced over at the quiet girl silently stroking and playing with Yeontan's fur. The dog looked like he was enjoying the attention.

Yoongi wondered if they would be still here come nightfall. His mind churned with anxiety—would the others call the police? Maybe they should...

"Uncle?"

"Yes?"

Jinsoo hesitated. "Am I a bad person?"

"Because you ran away?"

She nodded, eyes glued to Yeontan in her lap.

"Not at all," he replied, making her look up in shock. "Namjoon ran away from home for a day when he was twelve."

"Uncle Joon?" Jinsoo gasped. "But...he...he..."

"Quite unbelievable right?" Yoongi laughed.

"Why did he run away?"

"I forgot. But you know, we all feel like running away sometimes," Yoongi told her, "running far, far from everybody because we feel like everyone hates us and we can't be happy. Every single one of us."

"You and aunty Lisa?"

"Yep."

"Uncle Tae and auntie Jennie?"

"Everyone," Yoongi nodded.

"Even...even Mom and Dad?" Jinsoo whispered.

Yoongi smiled. "Would you like to hear some stories? Maybe it will help you see that it's okay to feel like running away. Why, I felt like running away when I was older than you! But thankfully, I met all your uncles and aunties—they helped me keep my head in the game."

"Run away...run away from home like me, you mean?"

"Not necessarily," Yoongi explained, "but the feeling is there and it can be harmful even if you don't act on it. That feeling of needing to escape can eat away at you, making you unable to care about the people that love you and want you to be safe. Honestly...even if you don't physically run away, mentally running away can be just as...worrying, for the people that care about you."

Jinsoo was staring at him, open-mouthed in amazement. He smiled but didn't bother to simplify his reasoning—he knew Jinsoo was smart enough to follow what he was saying.

"Who should we start with then?"

"Uncle Kook?" she ventured. "He's always so happy, even in the videos. What would he want to run away from?"

Yoongi smiled faintly as memories flooded his mind's eye. "Kook it is then..."


	15. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 5)

"No sign of either Jinsoo or Yoongi," Rosé sighed as she got off the phone with her husband. She glanced at the two silent woman sitting on the couch, her heart aching for them.

"We...we should inform the police so they can search for them," Jisoo said slowly, "we should have done that from the beginning!"

"Unnie wait a little longer," Rosé said weakly, "it...it will only reflect badly....people will ask questions—"

"To hell with everyone!"

"It might be harder for Jinsoo to handle if she's found and people keep pressuring her to find out why she ran away," Rosé said softly, "let's wait a little longer. Taehyung said the only real threats in the forest are those snakes. With the weather being chilly as it is, I doubt they'll be out and about much."

She sat in between the two women and squeezed Jisoo's hand. "We can only hope and wait. Namjoon said that if nobody finds either Jinsoo or Yoongi by sundown, we'll call the police."

She glanced at the Lisa who was holding on to her phone like it was her lifeline, waiting for the call that would end her worries.

Lisa—although miffed for not being informed of the impromptu search-and-rescue mission—was quite fine with staying with Jisoo and Rosé looking after Matty and Daniel.

But it all went downhill when Namjoon called to inform them that Yoongi wasn't picking up—her husband had either run out of battery or he got lost and he had no signal.

That had been hours ago, almost since the morning. As the shadows darkened, so did Lisa's optimism.

Surely by now, they would have had found some sort of sign?

She leaned into Rosé, feeling her chest squeeze tighter even as Rosé wrapped a comforting arm round her shoulder.

"Hang in there, Lili," Rosé murmured.

"What if he got hurt? What if he's out there, all alone...." Lisa closed her eyes, banishing the worst scenarios from her head.

That stubborn idiot, why did he have to leave Jungkook and play the hero?

Rosé tightened her hold, bringing Jisoo into the hug as well. Lisa closed her eyes, gripping her phone.

"Please," Lisa whispered, "please call....please be safe...please..."

>

"....who's next?" Yoongi croaked. He had been going through the members one by one, talking about their hardships and how each and everyone of them, at some point, felt lonely and wanted to run away.

"You and my parents," Jinsoo said promptly.

"Alright, who should we do first?"

Jinsoo tilted her head in thought. " You....and then....eomma and appa...." she said quietly.

"Ahh me," Yoongi said sagely. "Let's say, difficult times had me sinking to deep, dark, scary depths that I hope you never ever get to go Jinsoo."

"Why?"

Yoongi hesitated, cautious on framing the next few sentences without frightening her. "Because in such places, you feel like the whole world hates you, you feel worthless and you think nobody loves you. Not even the people close to you and begging to be let in stand a chance, because you erect a high wall that shuts everyone out."

"Why do that?"

"An unhealthy behaviour the brain thinks will help it to get better," Yoongi said, "when it's sad, the brain will either make you go find people to be comforted or do the exact opposite and push people away. This happens a lot when you believe to be unworthy of being loved, incapable of doing remotely anything, for a long time."

"Depression?" Jinsoo asked shrewdly. Yoongi bit his lip.

Had he gone too far? Was talking about such a thing to a child....wrong?

"A girl at school said her Mom told her you had depression," Jinsoo said, "her Mom said you always used it as an excuse to get away with things and become famous because people would pity you."

Yoongi smiled bitterly. "Persons like your little friend's Mom are the reason people don't express their real selves. I spoke about it....because I didn't want people to feel alone. Because feeling alone in a crowd is possibly one of the worst feelings ever. I spoke about it...so people would have comfort. They would know I have got their backs, through me and the rest of Bangtan's music."

Jinsoo was quiet, churning over Yoongi's words. "Did it make you want to run away?"

"Yes. Run away and hide from people so I don't get hurt even more."

"You didn't though, did you?" Jinsoo sounded downcast. "You were good and didn't run."

Yoongi chewed on his bottom lip. Aside from being unable to find out why Jinsoo ran away, it was getting steadily darker.

He was cold, hungry, thirsty, frazzled and back hurting. He worried about Lisa, worried that Jinsoo might bolt, worried the others won't find them before something happens...

"Uncle Yoongi, what is it? What's wrong?"

"What?" he asked perplexed.

"You're crying," Jinsoo whispered.

Yoongi blinked as a single tear dropped down his cheek. He turned away in shame, appalled at himself.

"I'm sorry, I...give me a moment...I'll be okay," he choked. He had lost control and allowed himself to be overwhelmed.

He was supposed to be strong, to give Jinsoo the impression of protection. Instead, he was out here, injured and defeated. Alone with a little girl and no way to contact home.

Yoongi felt helpless.

"Tell me about Mom and Dad?" Jinsoo said timidly. Her little hand slipped into his own, giving him warmth.

"Yeah..." Yoongi collected himself. "Jisoo....and Jin....the oldest, and the most underappreciated. They were known for their visuals, but mostly stopped there. Both of them worked hard to please their fans and meet high standards.....even if they weren't always treated so well, by both fans and their company. They just....tried their best.

They were both bashed and insulted, called the least talented or just viewed as pretty faces...it must have hurt. I know it hurt Jin, even when he shrugged it off. But he had immense pressure to prove himself—he didn't even know how to dance or sing in the beginning. At night, we often heard him apologise in his sleep, saying sorry for messing up, and he practised many long hours. He always hid his insecurities behind a smile and his goofy behaviour.

Lisa told me how your mother felt the pressure to dance better and sing better aside from speaking English, because all three of your aunties could speak it well. Their old boss also didn't push her promotions all that much, in comparison to others. Your mother always took such good care of her members but never really shared her burdens, preferring to save her pains and tears for her pillows, just putting on a smile and making people around her laugh...." Yoongi trailed off.

"They didn't run away...." Jinsoo said slowly.

Yoongi closed his eyes. "No. No they didn't."

They were quiet once more. Yeontan had gotten up to sniff around, chasing after some wiry small forest creature before coming back and plopping himself in Jinsoo's lap.

"Mom and Dad think I'm too different from them," Jinsoo said finally, startling Yoongi. "They don't like me."

"What did they say exactly?"

"That I don't act like a kid at all. And they don't know how to deal with me. They said I wouldn't fit in."

"They did?" Yoongi frowned.

That didn't sound like them at all....they never once tried to fit in with the crowd....

Jinsoo nodded. "I can't—"

"I FOUND THEM!"

"OH MY GAWD!"

"YOONGI HYUNG!"

"AND THAT'S JINSOO!"

Yoongi was suddenly blinded by powerful lights shining in his face as the whole forest seemed to come alive with the cacophony of powerful voices deafening him. He sensed Jinsoo leave his side as Yeontan barked up a storm.

"Jinsoo no!" he croaked out, "don't go—"

Through the roiling mass of legs and bodies stampeding around him, he could make out a tall, broad-shouldered figure crushing Jinsoo in a tight hug with another tall shadow breaking through the trees and stumbling towards the group.

"What...what's happening?" Yoongi gasped weakly. He shielded his eyes from the harsh glare. "What—"

"Hyung oh my goodness!" Taehyung's face appeared over him as he threw himself next to Yoongi. "Oh gawd! Yoonho, my man, I need you to find me sticks! We need to light a fire immediately! Jump to it!"

"Sir, yessir!" His son saluted before scurrying off to carry out his order, only to be stopped by a hand on the scruff of his shirt.

"And just exactly why do you need sticks, hmm, Taehyung?" Jennie's sarcastic voice cut through the great hullabaloo disorienting Yoongi.

"For a sacrifice to the Old Gods! We need to give them a blood offering so they'll return Yoongi's mobility!" Taehyung said in such a serious voice that Yoongi's eyes widened.

"And just who will you be serving up?"

Taehyung paused. By the torchlight and shadows splashing on his face, Yoongi could see his brow furrowed in thought.

"Yoonho?" Taehyung ventured, like an uncertain student answering in class.

"I'm afraid no child of mine will be participating in any sacrifice today—you'll have to find some other way," Jennie said calmly.

"Are you guys serious right now?!" Jimin asked shrilly. "Yoongi's hurt and Jinsoo is...Jinsoo is..."

"She's okay, Jin has her," Namjoon loomed over Yoongi. "Hello, hyung."

"You, calm down your screaming boyfriend and my husband, they're giving me a headache. And you— call Jungkook and get Taehee on the line with Yoonho, he'll guide her here," Jennie ordered with a toss of her head. "I'm calling Rosie."

Jimin scuttled to pacify a screaming Hoseok as Namjoon dialled Jungkook's number.

"Yoongi! Oh my gosh is he dead? Is he breathing? Somebody do CPR! YOONGI! oH MY gOd whAT IS thAt mONSter neXt to HIm geT IT AwaY GEt IT awAY!!!"

"Hobi please, calm down that's just Yeontan—"

"Guys," Yoongi croaked, "guys—"

"He's alive oh thank goodness!" Hoseok threw his hand up to the heavens, where the first stars could already be seen peeping out to see what was going on down below.

"What happened? How did you hurt yourself?"

"How did you find Jinsoo?"

"Is she okay?"

"Shut up he can barely speak—"

"Do you think we can move him?"

"Should we?"

"Maybe we better call a doctor—"

"Oh for my sake!" Jennie snapped as she got off the phone with Rosé, "SHUT UP."

Her voice rang out over the men's, immediately making them fall silent as they glanced up at her.

She sighed and shone her light at the contents of Jinsoo's bag before picking up the bottle of water.

"Yoongi, can you sit up?" she asked gently.

Yoongi stared at her in shock—hearing Jennie speaking softly to him was alien. Usually, she addressed him sarcastically.

Maybe the fall messed with his head.

"N-not really. I think I pulled some muscles. No broken bones—I felt my ribs."

"Help prop up his head," Jennie instructed. Someone cradled his head in their lap (Yoongi suspected it was Jimin, because of the firm thighs) before Jennie held the bottle to his mouth and carefully tilted it to allow him to drink, cool fingers massaging his scalp.

Yoongi drank greedily, eye fluttering shut in contentment. He didn't stop until he had drunken every last drop.

"He looks like a baby," Yoonho giggled making everyone chuckle.

"Alright, now we have to figure out how to take him back. We can wait for Jungkook to meet us up, more man-power," Jennie decided before turning her attention to Jin and Jinsoo.

Yoongi also looked over, trying to figure out what Jennie was saying over the hubbub of the rest of the boys trying to talk to him. He saw Jennie speaking with Jin as he held Jinsoo close. She was curled up in her father's arms, her face buried in his neck.

"Jin will be taking Jinsoo," Jennie reported once she finished speaking with him, "I'm going with them to guide them back and I'll be taking Yoonho. Tae, you think you can manage? Don't leave before Jungkook and Taehee find you."

"Wait but Jinsoo—Jen she didn't want—you can't force her—" Yoongi said desperately as he attempted to sit up. He gnashed his teeth, ignoring everybody's protest and grabbing onto the nearest shoulder for support. His eyes met her resigned gaze.

"Jinsoo, are you okay with going back yet?" Yoongi asked softly. "I know you said no but...your Mom missed you so much. Your Dad, he missed you too."

"We all did," Jimin stepped in as every person nodded in agreement.

Still Jinsoo remained silent, the tension growing thicker until Yoongi felt it crush his lungs. He glanced at his eldest hyung, who had his eyes squeezed shut. Yoongi couldn't bear to think what Jin was feeling: holding on to his child who still wasn't sure if she wanted to return.

What would they do if she didn't?

The answer—taking her back anyway and treating the whole situation like one does with a kid's tantrum—seemed wrong and inappropriate because Jinsoo's reasons ran deeper than what kids usually rebelled against.

"We couldn't go watch the martens today....maybe we can tomorrow?" Yoonho piped up hopefully. "You like the kits, right noona? I know a litter that was born just a week ago, I wanted to show you!" he added cheerfully. "And we can name them like we usually do! Whaddya say?"

Everyone held their breaths expectantly.

Jinsoo cast about her, looking at her concerned aunt and uncles in turn before finally switching back to her cousin. She gave a great sniff and rubbed her eyes furiously then nodded as she broke out into a small smile.

"Yeah, that would be cool."


	16. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 6)

"Incoming," Taehyung muttered once they emerged from the woods.

Yoongi lifted his head—his neck giving the slightest tweak of pain—to see all the lights blazing on in the house. Two dark figures emerged from the back door, running full tilt to meet them.

"JINSOO!"

The shortest of the two figures was running surprisingly fast even though heavily pregnant, hair streaming behind her as she stumbled and nearly tripped in her haste to reach her daughter and husband.

Jin was leading his daughter hand in hand, letting go of Jinsoo and watching as she ran to her mother. Everyone gave them a wide berth with Jimin, Hobi and Namjoon walking next to Jungook who was carrying Yoongi. Taehyung and Jennie were walking ahead with their children. Without meaning to, everyone had stopped, mesmerised y the scene.

Yoongi watched as Jisoo opened her arms and caught Jinsoo, squeezing her close as she rocked her daughter. By the light of the round yellow moon that had fully risen in the sky, Jisoo's face was clearly wet and shining with tears. Jin joined his family, kneeling down and covering both girls with his long arms. His relieved sobs rang clear into the night.

"Yoongi..."

He noticed the taller figure had gradually come to a stop several feet away, panting. Her features came into sharp focus beneath the moonlight—tired, relieved eyes; dishevelled hair, trembling lips, shaky arms and knees.

He answered the question before Lisa even spoke it. "I'm okay love. I'm okay. I'm sorry for worrying you. Forgive me?"

Lisa's eyes swam in happy tears. "Just get him over here Kook, and lemme kiss him! I can't even feel my legs right now."

>

All was quiet in the Kim household.

It had gotten late. They had taken Yoongi straight to bed and put him on his stomach, much to his chagrin because he never liked sleeping on his stomach. They placed heated pads on his back to help alleviate most of the pain and hopefully speed up the recovery process.

Namjoon feared a haemorrhage or a concussion, given the dark shade of the bruises coupled with Yoongi's light-headedness after they learned he had also been knocked out with a falling branch.

As a precaution, Taehyung had phoned the village's doctor to come over for a quick check-up and thankfully, nothing serious beyond over-extended muscles and nasty bruises had been diagnosed.

Jin and his family had disappeared into their room, presumably to talk and cuddle. Jisoo hadn't lifted her hands off her daughter.

Yoongi caught Jin's wrist before the latter followed his wife out of the living room, where everyone had congregated.

"Hyung, listen to Jinsoo without judgement. Please." Yoongi pleaded.

Yoongi's wandering thoughts returned to the present when he spied Lisa move into his line of vision as she rocked Daniel, kissing his tufty hair and laying him down in his crib. She sighed, shoulders sagging as the tension seeped out of her.

Lisa turned around slowly to meet Yoongi's gaze. He allowed himself to—for the umpteenth time—admire his wife's beauty.

"Come to bed," he called softly, "you must be tired."

"I am," Lisa admitted as she slipped in between the sheets and scooted closer to him. For one long moment, nobody said a word. Yoongi let his eyes flutter shut when Lisa leaned closer and rested her forehead on his. It was when he felt her soft bangs tickle his forehead that he allowed himself to fully relax.

_They were safe. They were together._

He heard her small giggle.

"What?"

"Nothing," she chuckled, "you're here."

"Of course," he said quietly, "at the end of the day, I'm always going to be here."

Her laughter died out as the troubled expression from before reappeared. It pierced Yoongi's heart—he never wanted to see such a heartbreaking expression on Lisa's face ever again.

"Yoon—"

Ignoring the strain in his neck, Yoongi reached forward and kissed Lisa, sweet and slow. Something wet dropped on his cheek but he didn't open his eyes to see her tears, not until the tear drop had dried on his skin.

"I was scared," Lisa said quietly, "I thought....I thought..."

"I know. I thought about you and Daniel too," Yoongi said hoarsely. He shifted and brought out one hand to clasp their fingers together. She squeezed tightly.

"Did you have a hard time with him when I wasn't here?" he asked.

"Today he was an angel, just like his father," Lisa smiled fondly, "only his father is this stubborn idiot that I really want to shake sometimes, for putting himself in danger and making me worry....but then I want to smother him with kisses too, because he's the best. And I can't imagine living without him."

Yoongi smiled sheepishly. "Come here and smother me then."

"I can't hug you right now. I don't want to hurt you."

"Just do it lightly. Rest your hand on my back," Yoongi said invitingly. "I missed your hugs."

"Okay...." Lisa followed his instructions carefully. Yoongi savoured her fingers tracing timidly down his spine.

"I'm glad Jinsoo is okay..." Lisa said at length.

Yoongi didn't reply immediately and Lisa nudged him.

"Hmm?"

"What's worrying you? She's safe now. Right?"

Yoongi hesitated. "Lali...it's just....Jinsoo isn't your typical kid...she...had reasons for doing what she did. It wasn't like Joon's case...a matter of throwing a tantrum and thinking you'll punish your parents by disappearing..."

"Then what?"

"I don't understand all of it..." Yoongi said in frustration, "but I've been thinking and thinking. I'm trying to piece things but there's bits of information still missing..."

"Yoongi. Hey. Look at me."

His agitated eyes found her calm gaze. She retracted her arm from over his back to stroke his face.

"Why are you so invested in trying to understand?" she asked softly. The pad of her thumb brushed over his cheekbone. "It's in Jisoo unnie and Jin's hands now."

"But..." Yoongi couldn't even understand it himself. But maybe it was Jinsoo's effect, her habit of questioning that made Yoongi reflect and search for the hard answers to difficult questions.

"I see something of myself in her. It's haunting," Yoongi said, "and....and I see her all confused and I remember how I used to be something like that and....I think...what if Daniel was in her place? Would I be able to answer? Would I be a good father? Lisa, what if it was Daniel who ran away today? I'd....I'd feel like a failure."

He went on before Lisa could interrupt. "I'm preparing myself to be a father, this is training. I'm trying to understand and solve this issue...in case something similar ever occurs. I can't risk not knowing, just fumbling around in the dark. I want to be a good father and recognise the signs and be able to give answers."

Yoongi drummed his feet on the mattress in frustration, burying his face into the pillow. "I hate not knowing! I feel so stupid and powerless! I kept talking to her but I couldn't change her mind, or learn just why she ran away! I was trying so hard to be patient but still....nothing...."

He sighed and fell silent, turning his head carefully to the side to see Lisa's expression. She bit her lip and ran a hand in his silky hair, lightly avoiding the swelling at the crown.

"You won't always know the answer," Lisa told him quietly, "but not knowing doesn't make you a bad father. If you try, with utmost patience and love, to just understand, even if you don't really find an answer....I know Daniel would feel that, and he'd be more than grateful for your effort—after all, that's what everyone wants, isn't it? To be understood."

"I suppose..."

"You understood me way back," Lisa smiled, "so I'm sure you can always try to get on Daniel's level and understand him. That's love at the end of the day, you know? I'm certain that he will appreciate your efforts. And together with him, you would be able to find the answers, or something close."

She leaned in to give Yoongi a soft kiss. "No matter what, I just know you'll make a great father. Trust me."

"How can you know?" Yoongi said miserably. "You're just saying that because I'm your husband and you're supposed to boost my ego."

"I just have a hunch."

She watched him furrow his brows and sighed. "I didn't manage to convince you, did I? I suppose I will have to let Time prove me right, then."

>

The next morning, after Jennie had gotten a tray for Yoongi to have breakfast in bed, Lisa helped him to turn to the side and prop his head to feed him. Earlier, she had helped him get to the bathroom with some difficulty, although he was moving a little easier today.

After a somewhat successful breakfast (Lisa had managed to feed him almost forty percent of it without spilling) the bed was cleared and Lisa brought Daniel over to their bed for some quality time to play with his father.

"He does look like a roly-poly," Yoongi commented as Daniel flapped his hands and legs helplessly on the mattress.

"Did you hear him? He's dissing you already!" Lisa gasped as she poked at Daniel's tiny starfish-hands. "I hope you have some rapping skills in you, you're gonna need them if you want to keep up with your appa!"

"Excuse me, but you called him roly-poly in the first place!"

Lisa stuck her tongue out at him and went back to tickling Daniel.

Yoongi couldn't be more content right now, watching Lisa caress their son's head and kiss his nose, making Daniel's face scrunch up as she giggled and nuzzled him. She suddenly stood up and darted to her purse, grabbing the camera and snapping pictures of them, cooing in delight.

Yoongi smiled when she handed the camera over to him to photograph her and their son together.

He had never given much thought to the domestic bliss touted by many families as the pinnacle of happiness of married life. Yet he would count himself a fervent believer nowadays, especially when witnessing small moments like these.

Small beautiful moments that completed his life.

A knock on the door had Lisa sitting up. "Come in."

Yoongi's back was to the door so he assumed Jennie had come back for the tray. She had greeted him softly in the morning, like last night. It was decidedly nice and he hoped this phase of 'sweet Jennie' would last longer—everyone needs a break from sarcasm every once in a while.

"Oh Jisoo unnie—and Jinsoo?"

Yoongi's head shot off the pillows, grunting at the slight pain that slithered like lightning up his neck.

"How are you Yoongi?" Jisoo came to his side and sat down on the bed. "Oh hey Daniel's here too, Jinsoo!"

Yoongi watched as Jinsoo joined her mother, glancing shyly at Lisa for permission to sit on the bed. Lisa nodded the go-ahead.

"Would you like some space? I can take Daniel, I was going to feed him soon." Lisa said.

"No hang on. Would you like to hold him Jinsoo?" Yoongi asked the girl, noticing her fascination with the infant. "I don't think you got to see your cousin yesterday."

Jinsoo glanced at him uncertainly, then at Lisa and her mother. "Umm...okay."

Jisoo reached out and took Daniel in her arms, pressing a thumb to his mouth. The boy immediately latched on and started to suckle, thinking it was a teat. It made the grown-ups smile.

"Someone's starving. He certainly carries a trait common to all of us," Jisoo teased. Yoongi noticed dark circles under her eyes. But the eyes themselves were, in contrast with yesterday's wild and haunted glaze, clear and bright.

"What's he doing Mom?" Jinsoo asked curiously.

"He thinks he's going to get his mother's milk," Jisoo chuckled, "lean against me and hold your arms like I'm doing. Like that...okay steady...there we go. He's a big boy huh?"

"He's heavy," Jinsoo giggled. She freed a hand from beneath the infant to wave at Daniel. "Hi! I'm your cousin Jinsoo. I'm sorry your appa got hurt because of me but I came to say sorry, okay?"

She looked up at Yoongi. "I'm sorry you got hurt samchon," she said contritely. "I'm sorry auntie Lisa. And I'm sorry I caused you all to worry."

Yoongi glanced at her mother, relieved to see her quietly playing and combing Jinsoo's raven strands as she rested an arm over her belly.

They seemed to be on good terms with each other again.

"It wasn't your fault," Lisa said softly. She came to sit on the edge of the bed as well.

"Actually it is auntie. I was in the tree. Uncle was trying to talk to me so he tried to climb after me....and he fell."

Yoongi's mouth ran dry when Lisa raised an eyebrow at him.

"You didn't mention Jinsoo was in the tree."

"I...I didn't want people to blame her," Yoongi mumbled. "She has to deal with enough as it is."

"We've been going around apologising to the others for the trouble we caused. You're the last ones," Jisoo put in.

"Is...is Jin okay? And you and the baby? And you Jinsoo?" Yoongi asked.

"We talked a lot, didn't we?" Jisoo asked her daughter, who nodded fervently, "her father and I....maybe we were being a little too...over-bearing. Trying to compare her to ourselves...."

"Mmmm..." Yoongi said.

"Yoongi's trying to understand," Lisa chimed in suddenly, "he's been concerned—"

"No I wasn't!" he muttered, "just...hoping you're all okay and everything..."

"I'm not blind Yoongi," Jisoo said gently, "I can practically see the gears turning in your head. You're trying to figure out why everything happened right?"

When Yoongi didn't say anything, Jisoo picked up again. "Jinsoo told us about your conversation, yesterday."

Yoongi stiffened. _He was in for it now._

Lisa looked on curiously—he hadn't really spoken much about the incident the other night, too tired to stay up.

Jinsoo was oblivious as she giggled and played with Daniel. Jisoo watched them fondly before turning her attention back to Yoongi.

"Thank you, for telling her," she said quietly. "You helped her, and us, a lot. You have no idea."

"I....I did?" Yoongi was perplexed while Lisa simply looked triumphant as she mouthed ' _I told you so.'_

"Jinsoo, can I tell him about what we talked yesterday?"

Jinsoo nodded her consent.

"Actually....would you rather you told him yourself? Is that okay?" Jisoo asked to Yoongi's surprise.

Jinsoo nodded again and passed a grizzling Daniel to Lisa who stood up.

"I'll go feed him, give you time to talk," Lisa said with a smile and left.

Jinsoo fidgeted with her fingers, seemingly uncertain.

"I don't know where to start," she blurted out.

"Maybe you could start by telling him the reason why? Don't worry, I will explain my side too," Jisoo said encouragingly.

Yoongi watched their interactions closely, satisfied by the affinity he was observing between mother and daughter. Where before there had been tension, there was now comfortable, absent touches and caresses. He hoped Jisoo wouldn't get carried away and become over-protective as a result of this incident—it was still too early to say.

But judging on how she was handing over the reins to her daughter, Jisoo didn't seem like she would be in any danger of turning into an overbearing parent.

"I ran away because...eomma and appa thought I was weird and different. They think I'm not like other children. The way they talked to me...I thought they didn't really love me because they were always telling me to be like other kids. And...and I couldn't...."

Jinsoo fidgeted with her hands. "When they told me I was going to have a baby brother or sister, I thought....that's it. They have grown tired of me. I thought, I wasn't good enough for them, they had to get someone else to be better than me. I thought they would forget me....like how everybody else forgot when Matty and Daniel were brought here. I thought...they don't want me anymore so....it's better if I go far away, and try my luck out in the world in some new city..."

Yoongi was at a loss for words when Jinsoo's explanation came to a close. Her mother patted her head.

"That was great, honey," Jisoo said softly, "I'm gonna talk with uncle now. Do you want to say anything else?"

Jinsoo shook her head but then stilled. "Oh wait, yeah!"

Her eyes, sparkling like Jin's, hovered over Yoongi's face. "Thank you for talking to me uncle Yoongi. I won't run away anymore."

She pecked him on the cheek and skipped out of the room. They heard her calling Yoonho's name, her voice lighter than Yoongi remembered.

"I....I...had no idea...." Yoongi began brokenly.

"Neither did Jin or I." Jisoo's shoulders sagged. "It hurt to hear her say we didn't love her. But I understand her. I know why she thought so. She may be justified to think like that, with all the signs we wre giving her—children are observant and take things to heart.

Jinsoo is at a delicate phase, besides being rather mature for her age which complicates things. But Jin and I talked together last night, with her. We promised to be more accepting, and to stop comparing her with us. And she promised to talk to us more."

"That's good..." Yoongi trailed off. "But....did you really call her weird? Soo, you and your husband aren't exactly on the normal wavelength...."

Jisoo looked away. "It's different...."

"It is?" he questioned, genuinely curious. "Why is it any different?"

Jisoo gave a heavy sigh. "Yoongi, she's the daughter of two famous superstar idols besides being quiet and solemn, almost like a little adult, which makes her stand out from the other kids....outcast. Her teachers tell me she doesn't mingle much..... always stuck in her little world..."

She fixed her strong gaze on Yoongi but her voice trembled. "I...Jin and I....Yoongi, you know how much the haters attacked me and Jin, sometimes for no reason at all. We could laugh it off, sometimes. And other times, it was too much to bear alone. I guess...I know we were all for being yourself and being self-confident. But I think...well, we were over-protective.

Yoongi, haters can attack me all they like, but I can't take it if they attack my little girl. What if she gets bullied? What if they pick on her because they see her as an easy target, since she's....different?"

"Jin and I went about it the wrong way, I see that now," she went on. "But we wanted her to be like the other kids, to blend in and be as normal as possible. Average. Just your typical, happy kid that runs around and makes mud-pies and plays with toy cars and dolls..."

"And deny who she really is?" Yoongi said indignantly. "Deny her identity?"

Jisoo didn't flinch but her voice was sad.

"Yes. We thought we'd be protecting her. We were wrong and even harsh about it. In my mind...I was hoping she'd never go through what Jin and I went through...but she ended up feeling rejected by her own parents. I never regretted succumbing to my fears more than now Yoongi, because look what happened—she thought we were replacing her. If it weren't for you, Jinsoo could have...she could have—"

"But she didn't. It's okay, she didn't, she's safe now," Yoongi comforted. "You meant well. I think...I'd be scared for Daniel too... I don't know what I would have done... what I will do when he grows up and meets people..."

They lapsed into brooding silence until Jisoo cleared her throat and picked up again.

"I never saw Jin cry like that before," she said in hushed tones. "He kept saying he was a failure. He's taken it badly. I know things haven't been the smoothest but I also know just how much Jin loves her. He just can't look beyond this incident...it's like he's forgotten how much she adores and looks up to him—Jinsoo is daddy's little girl through and through...."

Jisoo smiled. "You know she said she wanted to go to the same college he's been to? And she wants to be a detective, like he wanted to be when he was young. I'm just hoping...with time, they'll find their way back to each other. I'm hoping Kim Junior here," she patted her belly, "will be of help."

"Did hyung talk with Jinsoo?"

"We did," she nodded, "almost all night. He even wanted her to sleep in between us, like when she was little but...there just isn't enough space. So he woke up during the night and checked on her now and then..."

"He's a caring dad," Yoongi said proudly, remembering the times when his hyung looked after them.

"He's the best...I only hope he remembers that."

"And...how's Jinsoo? You think...she understood your side? That you were trying to protect her?"

Jisoo nodded. "That's where you come in. You think you might have not affected her in any way but she listened to you and she told us....everything. Everything you told her, about us and the others. It helped her a great deal. Didn't you see how much more open she is now? She told you what happened all by herself."

He had to admit that Jinsoo did indeed talk more freely than the previous day but he was still baffled.

"But...what did I do?"

"You told her about us," Jisoo said simply, "you told her about the group's hardships. You told her how everyone, absolutely everyone, has days when they feel like running away instead of standing up for yourself and facing your doubts and fears and talking about them.

She understood that Yoongi, and she promised she'll open to us in the future. It's all I could ever ask—to be there for her whenever she needs me. And to do that, I need her to be open and receptive. I need her to communicate with her father, me, or even her aunts and uncles."

She smiled. "So thank you for telling her about us—you don't know how much help it is."

Yoongi was still staring in a daze when there came a knock on the door and he heard his hyung's tired voice calling Jisoo.

"Soo-ya? Lunch will be ready soon."

"Come sit with us," Jisoo called to him. Yoongi heard the door close and footsteps shuffled towards the bed until Soekjin's tall broad frame ambled into view.

"Morning Yoongi. How's your back?"

Despite his handsome features, Jin looked downcast, even when his mouth quirked up in the all-too familiar plastic smile he donned for stages.

"Could have been better. You?"

"Could have been better," Jin replied gloomily. Jisoo tugged at his arm, making him plop down next to them on the bed.

"We told him about it," Jisoo said, running a tender hand through Jin's hair. He sighed.

"Well?" he asked Yoongi. "What do you make of it?"

Incredibly, Yoongi smiled. "You're not a failure hyung."

Jin didn't say anything and Yongi took it as a cue to continue.

"You're not. Stop seeing it that way. There are always going to be fall outs, some more severe than others. What matters at the end of the day is that you talk it out and listen to each other. And you accept your shortcoming and then move on, making sure to always be there for your kid....nobody's a perfect parent, Jin. We're all learning. Heck, I'm terrified I won't be a good father. But...it matters that you put effort into trying. They can feel that."

Yoongi took a deep breath, remembering what Lisa had told him. "At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that you got together as a family and talked about it. Something good must have come out of it because Jinsoo talked more—I can already tell the difference. And she wouldn't have been able to do that were it not for your understanding and patience.

Hyung, you told me I will be okay if I show my son how to love himself, the people around him, and the world. That is honestly the best advice anyone has ever told me about parenting so I will say the same things back to you, even if you already know them.

Teach Jinsoo how to love every aspect of herself despite the hate she might get, teach her how to accept her enemies without being a doormat for them, and teach her that although the world can be a harsh, cruel place, like it's always on the point of crushing you....well then, show her how to turn it into a happy oasis. I know you can—you used to do it with us, ARMY, and Jisoo."

Jisoo was nodding in agreement while Jin looked positively flabbergasted, with his jaw hanging low. It made Yoongi snort.

"Hyung, you look like you saw a ghost."

That elicited a chuckle from Jin. "I guess you could say I was...spooked."

All three of them laughed.


	17. The Most Beautiful Moment in Life (Part 7)

So I'm assuming we're back to normal?" Jennie asked much later in the afternoon. The whole gang was currently meeting in Yoongi and Lisa's room.

It was a tight fit but everyone adapted—Jimin sat in Hoseok's lap, Yoonho and Taehee sat on either of Taehyung's knee, Jennie leaned against the wardrobe, Jisoo sat on a chair while Rosé sat on the desk as she cradled Matty with Namjoon leaning against the door frame. A whiny Jungkook sat cross-legged on the floor next to Jimin and Hoseok (he was missing Tzuyu —she was busy on a modelling schedule overseas). Lisa and Daniel sat on the bed with Yoongi while Jin had Jinsoo sitting in his lap next to Jungkook.

"Pretty much," Jisoo shrugged. "I know I apologised already but sorry for acting crazy yesterday. It was out of line."

"You seriously scared me. I thought you were possessed or something—"

"You've been watching too many horror movies Hobi—"

"Oh so that screaming wasn't actually you guys having s—"

 _"There are children here."_ Jennie glared, making Jungkook wilt. "Yoongi, how does your back feel?"

"Been better, but it's on the mend, thanks for asking," Yoongi replied as he held up a thumbs-up.

"Good, because by the end of the week I was thinking we could all go for a picnic or something, before y'all clear off back to the city."

"That sounds great," Yoongi said, "but I wonder why we're all sitting in my room to decide that?"

Jennie visibly drew a deep breath and exhaled, closing her eyes in the process. " _Because in this family, we discuss plans and outings together Yoongi."_

"How touching," Yoongi teased as around him people tittered and looked on in amusement, "does this mean that you've come around to the idea of our children possibly....getting together some time in the future?"

"Don't push your luck," Jennie gritted, "I told myself I'd be nice to you because you got hurt but I'm starting to regret my decision. Hurry up and get well, being nice to you is making me sick."

"Oh but don't you think it would be sweet if say, my kid got together with one of your kids?" Yoongi asked as people openly snorted and snickered. "Why, Lisa here even made up ship names—"

"MIN YOONGI THE KIDS ARE RIGHT HERE!" Jennie yelled.

"Why is Mom shouting at uncle Yoongi?" Yoonho asked in confusion.

''Why is Mom _always_ shouting at uncle Yoongi?'' Taehee wondered.

"What, you mean I never told you?" Taehyung gasped with eyes round as saucers. "Most grievous indeed," he muttered, stroking his beard.

"Never told us what?" asked the twins.

"Pay very close attention, my children," Taehyung said solemnly, with the air of a wise old man of the mountain. He patted their backs. "Here we are witnessing the remnants, the echoes if you will, of The Epic Rapper Showdown, a historic event that happened long before you two were just twinkles in your mother's eye. It will go down in history as the day the great spitfire Jennie Kim lost to the tongue technology genius Min Yoongi—"

"I DIDN'T LOSE!" Jennie bellowed. "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THAT? I STUTTERED FOR ONE NINETIETH OF A SECOND, NOBODY NOTICED! "

"Okay Jen we get it, you didn't lose." Jisoo had her lips clamped shut tightly and she wasn't the only one struggling to contain her mirth.

"WE CAN DO IT AGAIN ANYTIME! ANYTIME, I SAID!" Jennie insisted, eyes bulging in her head.

"No grudge, no hard feelings?" Rose's eyes glittered mischievously.

"NONE WHATSOEVER!"

"—as you can see, she's clearly _still_ salty about it. She never recovered—it was a huge blow to her honour—"

"I AM NOT SALTY."

"And that, my children," Taehyung intoned, "is why to this day, the children of House Taennie are forbidden from ever mingling with the children of House Yoonlisa, on pain of death or worse, disownment."

"Taehyung what the actual fuuuuuuuuurrrbabies," Jennie amended hastily at a pointed look from her husband.

"Fuuuuuuurrrbabies again!" Yoonho crowed gleefully.

They all burst into laughter, many doubling over in hysterics with tears streaming as Taehyung smirked while a dejected Jennie shook her head. She was actually trying to keep a straight face but even she conceded with a shrug upon seeing her children and the rest of the group guffawing.

_Jennie Kim knows how to take a joke, alright?_

Yoongi laughed along with the rest, savouring the best kind of happy sounds from the people he loved most in the world. He sat back in his bed, like a king surveying his kingdom (even though Lisa had protested, he wasn't about to lie on his stomach and have people check out his backside.)

A moment such as this one would be stored away in his memory to join his other collection of snapshots of beautiful moments. And with every new addition, it was always getting that little bit harder Yoongi to pick out the most beautiful moment of his life.

Because performing on a stage in front of thousands with his family brought an exhilarating dizziness, a rush of pure adrenaline-induced euphoria, as did Lisa's proposal and then the birth of baby Daniel.

But here, lying in bed with a hurt back and surrounded by laughing faces lined with the ghosts of weariness and worry, happiness took on a new form—it was intimate and private, away from the prying eyes of the public. It was the comforting sense of people close to him being okay together and looking towards a hopeful future, making his chest flood with light. It was the inane sense of security and warmth that radiated from each person's face.

Yoongi closed his eyes...

>

Everyone had left the room after some more light bantering and reminiscing. Yoongi was cuddling with Lisa in their bed, watching her trying to smooth the stubborn quiff on top of Daniel's head.

"Yoongi?" Lisa said in his ear.

"Hmm?"

"Is your back hurting? You're getting....teary-eyed..."

"No, I'm fine. I'm fine," he whispered. "I just...I'm happy. Everyone is here and happy... so I'm happy too."

He glanced at Lisa, mirroring her tender smile as he tucked a strand behind her ear then redirected his gaze at his son. The little boy looked up at his father with wide eyes.

"One day, your mother and I might not be there for you," Yoongi told him quietly, "although I hope that time won't be until much, much later. And when that time comes...I hope you will remember the things I taught you. I will do my best to prepare you."

He locked his pinky finger with Daniel's tiny pinky and solemnly decreed: "Pinky promise." It made Lisa giggle.

Yoongi grinned likewise and kissed his son's tufty head, but he wasn't finished.

"The most beautiful moment in life hasn't yet happened," he said, eye flickering up to meet Lisa's, "I can't decide which it is, even after all this years because every time I say _this is it,_ something bigger and better comes along. So right now, I have a collection...a constellation of bright and beautiful moments that light up my life. I suppose I'm waiting for the next one to come along..."

"Moments like those will come," Lisa reassured as she snuggled closer, "I'm sure of it. Your collection will only ever grow. Why settle on one absolute single beautiful moment? Why not hang on to each every one? They all have different meanings, different types of happiness."

Yoongi's smile slowly broadened. "I'm so lucky to have married a wise wife."

Lisa smiled, her eyes shut. Yoongi nudged her.

"Aren't you going to say something back? A thank you perhaps? Anything?"

"I'm asleep." Lisa retorted, eyes still closed.

Yoongi huffed. "We were having a moment."

"We were? We have many moments, I lost count." Lisa teased and pressed her index finger to his lips before he could utter another word. "Let's sleep, Yoongi. Look, even your son got bored."

And indeed, Daniel was soundly asleep.

Yoongi grunted. "He's yours too."

"Yeah I know, I pushed him out of my—"

"That means you're partially to blame for his sleepiness, he got the sleep gene from you."

"Are we really having this discussion right now? Because it's on—"

"I'll drop it and forget everything if you call me _oppa._ " Yoongi smirked.

Lisa groaned, turning pink as she buried her face in the pillow. "Really?"

"Yes really," he teased. "Come on, you called me that the other day."

Lisa groaned again and Yoongi smiled wickedly.

The others used to tease her tendency to affectionately address him as 'oppa' when they were younger but nowadays, Lisa avoided using the title, claiming she was all grown-up and mature.

Lisa's hands snaked around Daniel's ears and covered them. Yoongi waited, smirk growing wider and wider as Lisa bit her lip.

"O _ppa_...." she squeaked.

"Hmm? I think I'm getting hard of hearing. Could you speak a little louder, jagi?" Yoongi asked.

Lisa glowered, but there was no real malice in her tone. "Oppa," she said quietly. The tips of her ears reddened.

Yoongi nodded in satisfaction. "Gosh, that takes me way back..."

He threaded his hand in Lisa, eyes softening. "We've come a long way huh?"

"Still got more to go," she replied and squeezed his hands.

"Hey Lali?"

"Mhm?"

"I still think Daniel gets his sleep gene from you."

"You're lucky your back's hurt."

"Why?"

"I really really want to flip you off the bed right now Yoongi, even if it will land you in hospital this time." Lisa turned away from with a faux huff.

"Why don't you?"

"I don't want to be murdered in my sleep by ARMY, thanks."

Yoongi grinned and carefully scooted closer without squashing the sleeping boy in between them. He craned his neck, ignoring the pain, until he rested his chin on her shoulder.

"I love you," he whispered in her ear, barely able to hold his chuckle

"Go to sleep, you clingy baby," Lisa scoffed with her eyes closed. 

She was smiling. 


End file.
